In respect to all of the things Leo had witnessed, this should have been the least strange. He saw me throw myself at his feet, begging him to take me when I clearly didn't want it. He watched me dance and sing in the rain as if possessed by the water gods. I had cowered in a puddle before him, so afraid of every man around me that I could barely speak. Yet, somehow, sitting in a quiet secluded forest and sharing cheese and wine was more uncomfortable. I nibbled on the snacks as daintily as I could, fully aware that there was nothing surrounding us to distract his eyes from me. 

"So Archer is good at archery," I said dumbly.

If Leo found it strange, he didn't let it show . "One of the best. It's rare that werewolves learn to defend themselves in human form as their wolf is more natural for them. However, if you've ever seen a dog play with a cat, going into battle face first isn't always the best option. They have come up with a new training program for their guards that make it easier to battle from a distance, even just adding a sword gives them an advantage."

"That makes sense," I mumbled, wishing I had something, anything, more concrete to add.

"He runs a pretty strict kingdom. This is the most relaxed I have ever seen him or his men and I'm quite grateful that I can learn from them."

"It's good to see that you two can be civil."

Leo took a hearty swig from the bottle of wine, glancing towards our horses that were tied to a nearby tree, drinking from a fresh water stream. "Unfortunately, I think that I was a big part of why we didn't have a relationship like this before. We were allies because of treaties, but my parents hated him, my brother hated him, and then, when it was time for me to take over, I hated him and his people. Not because of anything that they have done, but because we don't understand them as a species. They have all of these weird things like predestined mates and the ability to shift."

"It can be confusing," I agreed, pulling the wine bottle from his fingers. "But, at his core, he is good and that is what matters."

"I know that now," he sighed. A chunk of bread was in his hand, but completely forgotten as he watched me. "He kept alerting my parents and then my brother and then me about what was going on in Riverstead, but I did nothing."

"You didn't know."

"But I did," he argued. "I knew. Maybe I didn't know the extent of it, but I knew that men were targeting werewolves. I knew that it was a place of unrest."

"You did what you could once you saw how bad it was," I reasoned. 

His eyes darkened, almost as if they shifted from tropical waters to a stormy sea. His hands curled into fists, the crust of the bread crumbling in his palm. Frustrated, he tossed the brutalized food aside. "But it was too late, wasn't it? People had already been hurt. That child will be afraid of humans forever. And you...I was too obsessed the chase, as if catching the criminals were a game, and you got hurt. I let the woman I love fall into dangerous hands."

It was true. I knew that it was. I had gone after the crooks while they had finished off their beers, probably coiled with excitement over their future win. And because of that I had ended up covered in swamp water, scurrying away from the very man that saved me. But seeing him like that, tossing the bread aside, looking as if he hated himself, I only wanted to make it better. 

"Hey," I whispered, gently touching his wrist. His gaze flashed up to me right away as I flicked away stray crumbs. Then, my fingers were gliding up the inside of his wrist, tracing a vein beneath the skin. "I'm fine. You saved me."

His free hand moved upwards. A thumb brushed against my cheek and I watched his lips part once then twice before he was able to find the words. "I know that you might not believe me, but it's true. I love you. I didn't want to, but I fell in love with you so quickly, before we were even married. And I know that I was awful. I know that I let harm come to you, but I will never let anything happen to you ever again. I swear it."

The words came out of my mouth without a single thought. "I know. I trust you."

There was only time for a breathless laugh from Leo before he pressed his mouth against mine. At first, it was slow, like he was asking for forgiveness, trying to show me what he could be, all he wanted to be for me. I fell into him, melting to his wishes.

Shivers rolled up my spine as I felt his palms settle on my thighs, warm and strong, the fingers squeezing the skin there. My breath caught in my throat, but he only deepened the kiss and I couldn't resist the taste of him. It seemed impossible that I had spent time hating him, wishing that I was as far away from him as possible, when I only wanted more and more of him now. I gripped the blond hair that curled whenever we got close to the sea and moved until I was not only touching him, but on his lap completely. 

His talented mouth traveled to my neck and my whole body tightened at the contact, the skin so sensitive and his mouth so smooth that I could barely form thoughts. He, on the other hand, was speaking in full sentences. "I love you when you cut up all the fabric in your room. I love you when you sound out words you've never read before. I love you when you are holding a dagger."

Something heady and wild rooted itself at the base of my stomach, but all I could do was mew as I was laid on my back. Leo moved back for a moment and the thin tunic that he was wearing was discarded. Just running my eyes over his bare skin, taking in the pink scars, the fine hair on his chest, and the muscles moving, was enough to make me feel parched. 

"I want you, Em," he whispered, his voice raspy and rough. "When you look at me like that...fuck."

I had seldom felt like this, but with the ragged way my chest was rising and the pleasurable frustration that was seeping upwards, crawling up my chest and squeezing my heart, I knew I wanted him too. 

But when he sank downwards, letting me feel some of his weight, I suddenly couldn't breathe. I was still holding onto his curly hair, knowing that I was embracing my husband. And it was my husband that was touching me, the large hand curling around my breast. My mind didn't care. It was haunted by what had occurred before, when I was beneath another man, listening to the waves crash on the shore, hoping, praying that the ocean would save me from a fate I didn't want.

"Em?" Leo whispered and his weight left me.

I hadn't realized that I closed my eyes, but when they parted, I couldn't see through the tears. "I'm sorry," I blurted.

"It's alright, you have nothing to be sorry about," he murmured. He gripped one of my shaking hands and pulled me up into a sitting position.

What was wrong with me? I knew that it was Leo in my arms. I knew that I wanted him and whatever he was offering, that was why my body thrummed at the sight of him. Frankly, even if I didn't want him, it was expected of me, required. I should have been able to press through, if not for myself than for him. 

"I can do it," I choked out. "I promise, I can lay still and-"

Brow low and mouth turned down, Leo was completely unimpressed. "You're being absurd. I've told you before that I can wait until you desire me."

"It's not that I don't want you," I rambled, fumbling with my hands in my lap. "This has nothing to do with you. I have been afraid of men and their power for a long time, long before we even met. I want to be with you, I just...panic."

My hurried confession didn't relax Leo's expression like I hoped it would. If anything, he appeared more frustrated. My gut twisted. Had I said the wrong thing? Had I been foolish to tell him the truth? Maybe it was like the monthly bleed and we were simply not supposed to talk about it.

"Is this because of what those men tried to do?" Leo hissed. 

"No, not entirely. Like I said, the fear was in me long before I knew you."

The hands that had been gripping my thighs, making me catch my breath were running through his hair, his eyes distant. "And when I'm on top of you, you feel that way, afraid?"

"Leo-"

"Don't lie to me please. I'm mad, but certainly not at you. I need to know how to be a good husband to you. Do I frighten you when I make advancements like that?"

I was unable to meet his eyes, staring down at the dirt and grass around me. "Yes."

"I understand," he rumbled. Then he was on his feet, pulling his shirt back on. "Come, we should return."

"Leo," I whispered, feeling so close to tears though I wasn't sure why this time.

"It's alright, I'm not angry with you. I promise." His voice was steady and there was something sympathetic about his expression, but it certainly wasn't the way his jaw was set, his teeth tight. "We will figure this out together, just not today." 

~~~Question of the Day~~~

Have you ever had your heart broken?

I have, but it was a friendship-break up not a romantic one.