Second lesson was finished finally and I made my way over to the great hall for lunch. Remus was right, perhaps eating something would make me feel better? A growling in my stomach confirming his concern, warning me to try and at least shove down a bread roll.

As I walked in I noticed how it was almost half filled with students instead of what it was like during dinner last night. The rumbling of my stomach seemed to die down a little with nerves, making me feel as if, if I ate something it might return again an hour later.

I shoved the thought out of my mind repeating what the kind boy had said to me.

"Eat, you'll feel better" I repeated over and over again in my head until I approached Lily, Marlene, Alice and the same boy Alice was paired with earlier today in Herbology. Awkwardly slipping down next to Lily I spoke.

"What's on the menu?" I joked...not funny Arty, not funny. I mentally cursed myself. Thankfully Lily laughed, though I couldn't help but worry it was only because she was nice.

"Only stress sandwiches" she smiled looking pleased with herself.

"You two are honestly pathetic" Marlene started "We all know the only thing that's actually on the menu is the smell of B.O and the taste of obscenities" she said with a poker face. 

I didn't quite understand until-

"THANK FUCK I AM STARVED" someone shouted, slightly stinking out the place like Marlene had suggested, she gave me a light nod as if to prove her point.

"Quidditch really is a beautiful sport" James sighed lovingly. I turned to face James who was flushed in the face and in robes that were on backwards.

"Shame you don't shower afterwards" Lily pinched her nose. James whipped his robe up and hid her face underneath it, finally turning it around the correct way so she could escape.

"Merlin's beard" she choked on his stench. Dramatically gagging and gripping onto the table as if she needed support.

"What you don't enjoy the smell of a musky man?" He budged me out of the way to sit next to her, gaping at her with a fake hurt expression.

"I don't enjoy the smell of a sweaty stalker, no" she laughed, gaining a proud look from Marlene.

"Oi and you two" Marlene spoke up gaining the attention of Alice and her close friend "Stop with the PDA ok, I'm gagging enough over here with smell, I don't need a disgusting sight as well!" she grimaced noticing that they were holding hands and giggling flirtatiously with each other.

"Frank, I mean it" She warned and they both laughed at her.

Suddenly a pair of arms snaked around Marlene's neck and I saw Sirius kiss her dramatically on the cheek, leaving a glossy pink mark.

"What the fuck Black?" she wiped her cheek down, removing the stickiness of the gloss onto his robe.

"Don't you think it suits me?" he puckered his lips showing off the pink tint. 

Sirius had always been really uptight and wouldn't dare stepping outside of the box at home; perhaps it was with fear that his father would punish him? he wasn't even allowed to participate in dressing up games, if he did he'd receive a slap around the head and shown to where boys should play.

 So, seeing him so freely express himself like this was strange...Everything had changed about him and I no longer recognised him for who he was when I knew him.

"Actually I love it, would you be curious to try out eyeliner next?" Lily spoke up swatting James' head away so she could take a good look at Sirius wearing lipgloss.

"If you're offering to teach m- What are you doing here?" He finally noticed me, wiping off the remaining lip gloss instantly and tensing where he stood. Panic quickly flashed in his eyes but was replaced with a look of manifested disgust. I quickly looked down at my lap, his gaze reminding me a little too much of his Fathers. 

"I- I can leave?" I asked, already grabbing a sandwich in front of me but fumbling and dropping it on the floor with nerves "Sorry." I whispered feeling a little chaotic.

Before I could properly untangle my legs out of the position behind the bench a soft hand gently pushed me down again.

"You're okay, you can stay. He's just joking, right Sirius?" Remus sat down next to me and handed me another sandwich from the plate I originally reached for. He gave Sirius a look and the angry boy sat down, clenching his jaw tightly. 

Peter followed shortly behind him and sensed the tension straight away, sitting next to a Frank who had finally let go of Alice's hand (Probably because Marlene wouldn't stop teasing)

"Who's died?" He spoke with wide eyes, shoving at least two sandwiches into his mouth.

"Remus and I's friendship" Sirius locked eyes with Remus, who was struggling to hide a smile, standing from the table to confront him. 

"Stop being dramatic you prick, you're probably just suffering with a case of hanger, nothing a nice slice of goose pie can't solve. Sit back down." he rolled his eyes, grabbing himself a chocolate muffin, not at all intimidated by the wild look Sirius had in his eyes.

"That may be true Lupin, but I'm also suffering from a case of 'Imma kick your ass tonight' so watch out!" He snarled, but listened to his calm friends request to sit down and eat, locking eyes with me and grabbed a chicken wing and tearing into it, sulking. 

"Make sure you keep it down the both of you though, yeah?" James sighed "I'm not sure I can cope with being woken up another night from you crying Sirius, pathetic really!" he and the rest of the boys laughed muffled by the sound of them eating.

"Me?! Crying? What are you talking about?" Sirius got defensive, whacking the half-eaten sandwich James held onto the floor.  James simply stared at the food on the dusty floor for a split second and then went into grab another one like nothing had happened. 

"Well we all know when you try to challenge Remus, suffocate Rem with pillows to get his attention or think giving him facial fur is a fun way of revenge for something that's mildly upset your ego, you're the one who always ends up sniffling in your bed like snivellus" He chuckled. 

The other boys laughed but looked awkwardly towards Lily, coughing to play it off.

"Hey..." Lily sighed as if they had insulted someone close to her, whacking James lightly on the arm. 

*

I zoned out of the conversation a little too aware that Sirius started ignoring my very existence, and everyone else seemed to follow his lead. Except the boy next me.  I finally looked up at him and absorbed his appearance. He was smiling softly observing his friends around the table, listening to every word they playfully spat at each other.

He had a slightly pink coloured scar on the side of his cheek, like it was freshly healed. Paired with more healed looking ones running across his nose and slitting through his eyebrow. I wonder how he got them? Is he clumsy? Did someone hurt him? A pang hit my chest thinking about how someone could hit such a warm smiley boy...but again I suppose physical discipline isn't uncommon at home, right?

His hair was a soft brown colour, slightly turning a red, golden brown in the specs of sun that shone through the windows. His eyes matched the colour of his hair almost perfectly, only slightly darker in it's chocolate shade, with specs of green circling his pupil. His face was speckled with freckles varying in shades of brown and soft orange and his lips were a soft pink colour and subtly pouty looking, with a thin scar running through the right side- barely noticeable if you weren't staring and-

"You alright, Arty?" Remus smiled at me showing off his teeth, noticing one small tooth slightly rotated compared to the rest and a small dimple popping out of nowhere on one cheek. 

I nodded furiously, feeling a little embarrassed that I had been caught so intensely staring.

"Just feel a little out of place" I whispered, trying to laugh as if it was a joke, shocking myself with how truthful I was being with a complete stranger. 

He sadly smiled and passed me a small muffin from out of my reach, which I accepted thankfully.

"He'll come around." His eyes darted to Sirius, who was aiming grapes into Peter's gaping mouth.

"It's not just him who doesn't want to be involved around another family member, I'm uncomfortable too" I mumbled, picking apart the chocolate chip muffin slowly. Shock registered in my face when I realised I had just made a petty comment about his friends "I'm sorry." I smiled and straightened up my posture.

"It'll just take some time" He smiled, hunching over slightly to meet my gaze "I'm glad you came and ate something" he chuckled, shocking me as he stuffed the muffin in my face, softly and playfully. 

I laughed genuinely for the first time since arriving at Hogwarts...some time, that's all it's gonna take.