***FIONNA***

Alex's words still have me laughing, but behind that, I want to cry ugly tears. Sure, we played it off like it was a joke, but I think when he said he regretted not losing his virginity to me, he meant it. To be perfectly honest, as glad as I am to have given mine to Kensi, I feel the same way Alex does sometimes. I'm taking it to mean he's never fallen out of love with me. Because even though he never said it while I was alive - and he claimed he hadn't been my boyfriend long enough for his feelings to reach that level - I know he did, at least subconsciously.

And now it's got me wondering - did I fall out of love with him? No, I don't think so. I mean, sure, I'm with Kensi now, and Kensi's amazing. But I think the reason why I was ever interested in her to begin with...no, it wasn't because we were put together as Guardian partners, even if Russell seems to have enjoyed playing "fucking matchmaker," as Gabe apparently said when he and Harris first met in Russell's office. (I've only heard secondhand accounts.) No, it's because Kensi, in some ways, reminds me of Alex. They're both emotional creatures, big-hearted and barely able to cope when someone they love is hurt.

Or killed, in Alex's case.

I've never told anyone what it was like to die. Russell encouraged me to talk about it to Jasmine over the summer - she was going to Heaven to work as a counselor at Balthazar, to keep an eye on Alex and all his angel friends, and she needed the practice - but I wasted that opportunity. I didn't want to relive that, as it were.

I couldn't.

I'm forever merciful that even though I couldn't avoid feeling every agonizing second, the last thing I saw was a faint vision of Alex, covered in rain, incoherently crying and screaming, begging me to stay with him.

Between then and me waking up vomitously in the Terminal - in a room somewhere off this hall, though which door leads there, I couldn't say - it was an eternity of dark, unending terror. Pure sensory deprivation as my soul floated around without a body, and only memories to keep me anchored. I struggled to keep my grasp on all the happy memories - first day of school; birthdays; first honor roll in grade school; playing with Kevin when he was a baby; meeting Gabe, kissing Gabe; meeting Kelly, kissing Kelly; meeting Alex, kissing Alex - but instead, the only memories I could really hold on to were the freshest ones.

The ones of Elijah projecting into me, forcing me to burn myself and make it easier for him to stab me and cut out my heart.

Jay, when Penner controlled his mind, called it rape. In a sense, it was. And I know exactly where he's coming from, more than I should.

I was only the last of Elijah's victims, but every last one of them was violated, body and soul. To me, he's a monster.

I don't know how I got onto this tangent, but it's time I got off it, because I'd rather talk about catching up with Kensi and taking her hand as we return to the Terminal. "Good as new, right?" I say, feeling the bones in her hand.

"No, better." She tightens her grip, then pulls away and ambles over to Grace's desk. "Wanna arm-wrestle?"

"Maybe later." She pouts at me until I sigh and kneel in front of the desk. "Fine. Do your worst."

"Sure, sure..." She slides past Grace and gets into position on the other side. "And as soon as we find a place to crash, you'll do the opposite of worst."

I turn around and give the room at large a bashful smile. "Sorry you had to hear all that TMI crap."

"No worries," says Gabe.

"Come on, Kensi," Jay says. "Take her down!"

"Why are you rooting for me?" she asks.

"You knew my girlfriend back home, that's why."

I raise my eyebrows and push my hair behind my ears, then lock hands with Kensi. Our left hands. This'll be a challenge, non-dominant arm-wrestling. "He's got a point."

"That he does, Fíli. That he does."

She destroys me because I'm too busy laughing at the nickname she's come up with. Only Alex ever shortened my first name to "Fi" - Mom tried it for a while, but Dad thought it was too Burn Notice, so she stopped - and Kensi's just taken it to the logical next step. Sure, I don't exactly look like a Tolkien dwarf, but it's a sign that I again picked my lover well.

Alex comes back into the Terminal at this point and says Ty will be along soon - he just has to undergo some final tests to make sure he's not concussed or anything. Then I turn my attention back to the Black Mirror, which sits idly by on Grace's desk. "So what's the plan?" I ask. "Have Jay use it right here?"

"If we can confirm that he'll be able to talk to his own past self, and not his angel's past self," says Annie. "Which he should, given that his angel is still alive." Her phone rings, and she steps aside to accept the call. "Harlan, we're about to do the Mirror thing, so make it quick...wait, what? You're shitting me! They're...no, yeah, it was the boys helping lift the corpse. Yeah, Alex too."

"What's going on?" Alex asks apprehensively.

Annie covers her phone. "Harlan says Freddie's body is getting eaten by necrophages. God, I should've told you not to touch him..."

"Can you stop it?" Alex looks freaked, and I don't blame him.

"We'll need Yash for that."

"He's still inside with Ty."

"Goddammit..." Annie walks away slowly, still talking to Harlan, but that particular conversation, I tune it out.

"Jay?" I wait for him to come up to the Mirror. "Okay, you know how it works?"

"Sort of." He brushes the Mirror's dials with his thumb. "Am I supposed to tune to Channel Three or something?"

"How'd you guess?"

He changes the dial until it reaches the number three. "Let's just say nobody else can reprogram the living-room TV to play whatever's on the DVD player like I can." He sits back and stares intently at the blank screen.

"Oh, sorry, that reminds me..." Kensi slide-leaps over the desk, not sticking the landing because she's a lovably clumsy fool like that. Then she kneels behind the Mirror and gets ready to power it up, the light shining from her fingertips and giving off small electrical crackles.

Careful where you stick those fingers, I think to her.

Oh, you know I'll give it to you without elemental toys. Never had that advantage on Earth, so I've learned to make do without it. She powers the Mirror, and the screen bathes Jay's pale face in its white glow.

"I'm not seeing anything but static and snow," he says. "Try another channel?"

"Try 'em all. You never know where you'll find yourself. Literally."

He keeps working the knobs, clicking back and forth. I think the Mirror only has thirteen channels - well, twelve if Channel One doesn't exist - but either way, it seems to only have a VHF dial. Don't ask me how I know what VHF is - or VHS, for that matter - despite having been born and bred in the third millennium. Benefits of being the product of people old enough to try and raise me on that kind of technology.

Finally, Jay finds himself. "Whoa, do I really fight like that?" he asks. "Like a g..." He stops himself just short of taking a swan dive into punchability territory. Not from me, because I'm shockingly mellow like that. But I wouldn't be surprised if Kensi were to lightning-punch him for finishing that sentence. "Like a goddamn dork," he amends.

"Talk to yourself," I urge him.

"I do that all the time anyway. I don't need anyone's orders for it." Gabe chuckles along with him - I hear him coming up behind me, his slim but tall form looming over me. He leans out behind me, trying to get a glimpse of the screen, but he might have to almost fall off the desk because I'm already leaning myself and probably blocking his way. Whoops, sorry about that.

It's okay. I feel his hand on my shoulder as he gets off the desk and kneels next to Jay. I'll just find another, better seat.

"Not this seat, please." Jay moves a few inches away from Gabe. "What if you give me interference?"

"Oh, sorry..." Gabe backs off and leans against the back of the desk, right underneath me. "Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm not used to being partners with a guy who's got a huge personal space bubble."

"And I'm not used to huggy dudes in general. Except my brother. Now hush, puppy." I'm not sure who's giggling more at this - me, Jay, or Gabe. But Jay soon returns to his intent, intense gazing into the Mirror. "So...what am I supposed to do, just talk to the screen and it lets me talk to myself? That's what you did, right, Fionna?"

"Yeah."

"Well, you didn't have to talk to yourself in the middle of a melee."

I risk interference on the screen by craning my neck, leaning over Gabe's sitting form, and looking at what Jay's watching. It looks like a Boomerang video on Instagram, looping the same one or two seconds of footage over and over, with Jay jumping in front of a big, shaved-headed dude as he attempts to kick Harris' leg - which is broken, and visibly so.

"Yeah, that's interference," Jay says. He swallows, growing paler than ever - sickly gray, even - as he watches Harris' leg flop around repeatedly on this bird's-eye-view. "Could you back away? Then I'll be able to see this thing keep going."

"Right..." I back away, almost bumping into Kelly, who's sitting behind Gabe. Ariel's the only one left who isn't gathered closely around Jay and the Mirror - he's keeping guard over the door back to the Second, pretty much. I'm not sure how much good a one-man army like him would do, but he could still surprise us all. He looks more than capable and badass enough. Basically, an Israeli Liam Neeson.

Jay returns his attention to the screen. "Okay, here we go..." He counts something on his fingers. "Okay, so it's playing the scene over again, like, from the beginning of where it came in before. If I watch this all again, I might be able to analyze it well enough that I could..." His voice trails off.

"You could what?" asks Kelly.

"Tell your past self where to attack?" Kensi cracks a smile at the thought.

"Where. When. How, maybe." Jay leans in closer, looking ready to singe his eyebrows off. Or, at least, he would if the Mirror radiated actual heat. I'm tempted to touch it and see if it's really as room-temperature as I think it is, but I could be wronger than wrong, and even if not, I might interfere too much with Jay's viewing. Because it's literally life or death, he needs to Zapruder the shit out of this footage.

"What happens when you pull this off?" asks Gabe. "Do you just vanish? And...and will Harris reappear in your place?"

"We'll just have to wait and see," Jay says through gritted teeth as he struggles to concentrate. A full minute later, he's ready to start. "On your left!" he yells at the screen. "Swipe right!" He actually makes this gesture, like he's holding some kind of lightsaber - or whatever weapon his past self was using. I couldn't get a good glimpse of it earlier, but it looked long. Maybe a staff, if not some kind of sword.

"Watch it!" I grab hold of the box, because Jay's coming close to knocking it over.

"No, no, no, no, no!" He waves me away. "Let go of it!"

I slide back, hoping I didn't wreck this simulation for him.

"Thank you. Okay...he's gonna hit Harris! Snag his leg! Snag it!" He rises onto the balls of his feet, crouching rather than sitting, then punches the air. "YES! YES! Take that son of a bitch down!"

I exchange glances with Kelly. It's like he's watching the Niners at the Super Bowl, she thinks. Or the Patriots.

Doubt that. Kensi shakes her head. I dunno about Hell, but on Earth, the Patriots are the team everyone hates, 'cause Tom Brady's a Republican crony, and Jay doesn't strike me as a Republican. He's not that uptight.

"I suppose I should take that as a compliment?" he scoffs. "No, no, no, he's...fuck! He still got Harris!"

"Well, you can still take him down, right?" I lean forward, almost falling off the desk. "Tell him to take that guy down!"

"I can't!" Jay twitches and wrings his hands. "I keep...I can't...I...every time I tell myself to do something, I keep...I keep trying to help Harris, and that's how I die!" He pants, rocking back and forth and flapping his wrists. "I don't wanna die, but...I can't leave Harris alone! I can't, I can't, I can't..." He buries his head in his hands, sobbing, his shoulders shaking. Even his wings start showing through the slits in the back of his hoodie.

"Jay..." I know I'm going to interfere with the Mirror, but he needs the hug I'm going to give him, and he accepts it. "Jay, it's okay. You can think of another strategy, can't you?"

"I..." He swallows, drying his tears. "I don't know. I think the best thing for me to do would be to not intervene. That's the only way I don't die right then and there...but I'll probably just die a minute later, if anything."

"Try that." I cross my arms. God, I think I might have had it really easy when it was my turn to fix my own death. Stephen King taught me once that the past likes to push back - is that what's happening now? The past got pissed and decided to really challenge us next time we wanted to make a change? Is it going to punish us endlessly until my human's death is made to happen once again, just like before?

Jay takes a stab at this, telling his past self to stay away from "Oscar," whom I'm assuming is the scary bald dude. Though when the sound is turned up - Jay actually hits the volume knob for this - we all still hear him, barking orders at his men in a rough, uncouth kind of English accent. What kind of jackass does this, attacking innocent children?

Wasn't just children, Jay thinks. "Behind you!" But me and my friends, we were all kids. They wanted us to fight them 'cause the adults who were supposed to... "Dark! Dark! Slick the floor!" They couldn't do the job. They chose my friends instead. And this little dude...what was his name...Henley? Anyway, he had these nanites that he was gonna use-

I gasp. "Did you say 'Henley?' Not Henley Rand?"

"Why, you know him?"

"That's my cousin's name!" And now, even with the official files still inaccessible to us, ideas start to crystallize in my mind. I saved my human's life, and now, Henley's human isn't there, on this night at the Ice Palace, to deploy nanites that might just save Jay's life. Why does my human living prevent Henley from being there, though? Unless he's just not reacting in time...?

"Was Henley there?" I ask Jay.

He shakes his head. "You mean at the Ice Palace? No. They just had his nanites. I sort of remember his mom brought them to Elena - oh wait, you wouldn't know who she is-"

I snap my fingers. "Whoever she is, tell her to release the nanites herself."

"You sure?"

"Yeah! Go!"

Jay swallows, then relays my words to his past self, who repeats the same orders on screen nine months ago.

We all lean in, waiting with bated breath.

Then we hear it. Buzzing, even louder than the recurring static we keep hearing from the Mirror. It almost sounds like a swarm of bees. Why do nanites always have to sound like bees? I see Gabe's on edge from that sound as it is, getting ready for fight or flight. He says he's been afraid of bees pretty much all his life.

It doesn't help that the next sound we hear is a spluttering, choking sound. I'm not watching, but I bet the nanites are interfering with Oscar's breathing, if not outright killing him.

"They're not gonna kill him." Harris leans back from the screen, brushing his hair back from his forehead. "They're not meant for that...although knowing Elena, I'm surprised she didn't."

That was it? Harris is instantly back, just like that?

No matter. I'm grateful it worked. And grateful for the chance to see Gabe crying out in surprise, tackling Harris to the floor, and kissing his face repeatedly. If he were wearing lipstick, he'd be leaving cartoony bright red marks all over the boy's face.

"Jesus H. Christ!" Harris pushes Gabe away gently, then sits back up. "Not that I'm complaining, but..."

"I'm sorry, dude. I just...I really missed you, you know?"

"Where've you been, Sweaty Elf Boy? I've never left!"

Behind us, there's a triple knock on the door - the one leading back to Bearville, I think, because Ariel reaches for the knob to answer it. "It's done, Annie," he says. "Harris is - wait, no, you can't come in here!"

Too late. I scream, as does everyone else who sees a curvy white woman who's way too tall to be Annie enter the Terminal and stab Ariel with a well-placed light blade that penetrates his entire torso, leaving bloody entry and exit wounds.

He falls to the ground with a heavy thump, and the woman steps over his body, her light blade retracting into her hand and the blood drops it picked up falling to the floor next to him. "I've been waiting a long time for that," she says in a voice tinged with hints of Penner's inappropriate cheer. "Gipsy Danger may have the most awesome sword in the multiverse, but this one's a pretty close second, I think."

"Alicia Wahlberg," Grace growls. "Great. More Peppermint creeps."

"Aww, and I was gonna introduce myself, but you stole my thunder." Alicia comes up to Grace's desk and pilfers the last of the cookies from her latest batch, gobbling it in one bite. "But that's okay. I'm not here for thunder. I'm here for some dark fire." She clicks her fingers at the Black Mirror, then zaps Kensi with a Penner-like Taser move until she lets go of it. "I'll take that." She picks it up. "And I'll take the McCallum boy too."

Gabe and I both jump in front of Harris. "Guess again, Ashleigh," he says.

"My name is-"

"Angelina, yeah, we get it, you're so jolie." She really is pretty, actually, but it doesn't make her any less evil.

"I hope you'll put up a better fight than those idiots in the morgue," she says. "Though considering they had to deal with a necrophage infestation, I don't blame them for not being on top of their-"

"Where's Alex?" Gabe yells.

"You'll see him soon. Once you give me Harris McCallum."

"We don't negotiate with terrorists," I hiss.

"Fine," Alicia mutters. "Playing hardball, are you? Have it your way. Rook...attack."

I turn around just in time to see Harris' eyes flatten, hardening into impenetrable stone, and his twin elementals roaring to life on both hands.

"Uh..." Gabe's no more willing to fight Harris than I am, but we have no choice. Maybe we'll have to let Alicia get away with the Mirror, but if we can get Harris to snap out of it first...

I do, however, spare the time to launch one last attack at Alicia while she walks away. Foolishly, she raises the Mirror to shield herself from my fireball, and the screen shatters, forcing her to bend down and pick up the pieces.

That's when Grace, Kensi, Kelly, and Ty strike, while I turn my attention to Gabe and how he's forced to use his ice to shield himself from Harris' fireballs.

No time like the present.

I jump in between them, ready to absorb whatever attacks come my way.