He was, in all-together, a perfect chaos of lust.

✘✘✘

Present day

My entire body was drained and I felt like Blue drugged me with something called tiredness.

Throughout the entire life of living with insomnia and headache, this is definitely the worst I've ever been.

It has been a week since we got put into
isolation and may I tell you, every hour felt like years. If you think I'm exaggarating and being a drama queen, you can freely go fuck yourself.

For the past week, Atlas and I barely spoke to each other which has been driving me more insane than I already was. Instead of communicating like normal people do, he was simply staring at the ceiling and mumbling something in his chin.

The only time he actually talked to me was when I refused to take his food we had been given once a day. Since we got here, he hasn't eaten once, which made me very angry.

How could he care so little for himself? Does he think he can give me his food and that will make everything right with us?

Besides the uncomfortably disgustung enviroment we were forced to be in, the stinking air and lack of daylight has been killing the life inside of me. I don't know how he managed to do it before without completely losing his mind.

As I was leaning against a dirty and wet wall, a loud clatter on the outside snapped me from daydreaming. From earlier experience, this only meant it was time for lunch and another fight with Atlas.

Without entering the small cell, a guard pushed inside two plates of inedible food. Don't get me wrong, I am not a greedy person, but if you actually saw the 'food' they fed us with, I think you would throw up.

I instantly looked at Atlas and our eyes locked, his glare warning me not to start it again.

I got up from the filthy floor and crossed the room in few steps. I picked up both of the plates and put them in front of him, signaling him to eat it all.

"What did I say to you yesterday?" he asked me with raised eyebrows and stiff body. "Just like every other day this week," he added and pushed the plates in front of my legs.

"You have to eat or else you'll starve to death!" I yelled in defence and pushed the plates in front of him again.

He stood up and crossed arms on his chest. Just by his look, I could tell he was furious and it wasn't something you could see every day. I'm used to him being mad at Gage or Jesus, but not at me.

"Did I tell you something or are you deaf?" he said through clenched teeth while looking at me with rage and spite.

I would've been lying if I said he wasn't terrifying, but besides that, I had to do the right thing. I had to make him eat or else I wouldn't be able to forgive myself.

"I don't care what you say, Atlas. You have to eat," I said in defense, narrowing my eyes. "You have no right to put the burden of your life on my back."

He let out a bitter laugh, followed by him punching the food to the other side of the cell. I winced and widened my eyes in shock, completely surprised by his sudden act of violence.

"Do you really wanna keep up with your stupid bullshit?!" he raised his voice, superiorly towering over me.

Earlier this day, I wanted to tell him something that had happened before we got caught, before we kissed. Now, I was so terrified simply of his look, I couldn't even properly stand on my feet.

"I hate you," I told him before I turned my back on him and sat on the other side of the cell.

I guess I'll just have to distance myself from him forever.

✘✘✘

One week earlier

We have been walking for what seemed like an eternity. Although Jesus couldn't stop talking to distract me, the scene from cafeteria played in my head like a broken record. It was inevitable to even try and listen to his blabbering.

"Brandy! Are you even listening to me?" his concerned voice snapped me from drowning in those violent scenes. I looked at him with an apologetic look, interlocking our hands.

"I'm sorry, I zoned out," I told him and he flashed me a friendly smile.

It was absolutely crazy how a special person can make you feel better when you're down. Nobody has actually been able to make me smile when I'm sad or depressed.

Nobody besides Jesus.

"Ladies first," he told me as he opened the metal door for me, which led to our smoking spot. I laughed at his words and got out to be greeted by fresh, alleviating air.

I sat on the floor as my back crashed against the tall fence. Jesus sat besides me and pulled out cigarettes, offering me one. I took it and lit the tip of it, inhaling the calming nicotine.

"So, Brandy," he said, dragging the words. "I've been thinking about you, about us," he continued and swallowed a lump, looking into my eyes with nothing but attraction.

I raised my eyebrows and smiled, showing him I don't bite. If I'm right about where he was going with this, I want him to continue. If he says what I think he'll say, I feel the same.

I really like him.

"I wanted to ask you if you would like to be my girlfriend?" he asked shyly, continuing shortly afterwards, "I know we haven't been on any dates yet and I would love to take you on one, but I don't think it would be very romantic doing it in a juvie. If you don't feel the same-"

Before he could keep talking nonsense, I grabbed his face and pulled him in, kissing his soft lips with passion.

It didn't take him long to properly react to my actions, he simply hugged my waist and pulled me even closer as a soft smile imprinted into my lips.

This was, without any doubt, the best I've felt in a really long time. His touch sent shivers down my spine, his smell filled in my lunges like no other perfume could and his lips simply consumed me entirely. He was, in all-together, a perfect chaos of lust.

I finally, after what seemed to be ages, backed off, staring into his sparkling oasis.

"Jesus, I would love to be your girlfriend," I replied to his question from earlier and laughed, realizing how it actually sounded. It didn't take him long to realize the source of my outburst.

"I just agreed to be God's girlfriend," I chuckled and Jesus tilted his back as he laughed.

Although it was most definitely not the funniest thing I've said, it was ten times funnier when I saw him dying of laughter.

It was at that moment I realized he was the source of my happiness. From the start, he tried to be friends with me and welcome me the most comfortably he could. I wouldn't be alive if he hadn't approached me on my first day.

I glanced at him with a cheeky smile as he gently kissed my hand. "Thank you," I whispered.

He frowned and hugged me with one arm as he intertwined our fingers with the other.

"What for?" he asked.

"For everything you've done for me," I replied and leaned my head on his shoulder. I closed my eyes and inhaled his refreshing scent that reminded me of mint.

I quickly forgot about the situation we were in and everything that happened ealier.

There was only him and me.

✘✘✘

Present day

"Do you promise you'll stay calm?" I asked Atlas as he glared at me with anticipation.

"Do you think this is a joke? If you said it was important, why would you-"

"Jesus asked me to be his girlfriend," I interrupted him, saying the sentence in one breath. He stared at me with nothing I could see through and I shivered in fear.

He wore a look that could kill. He wore it better than the devil.

From one second to one hundrend, the silence stretched with neither one of us saying a thing. Although he didn't say shit, I could see everything he wanted to tell.

Hurt, anger, pain, sadness.

Confusion.

For the first time since we've met, I can finally see his feelings and it was the worst experience ever.

"What was your reply?" he asked in whisper, his voice monotone and hungry.

Hungry for blood.

"I said yes," I whispered so quietly barely I could hear myself. If we wanted to be honest, I was scared of him. Yes, I've seen him fight and beat people to death, but this was something else.

This time, the cause for the appearance of his emotions was me.

"What did you say?!" he screamed and crawled to my end of the cell, his asymetric eyes sparkling with rage.

Our faces were so close to each other, I could feel his jumpy breath bouncing off my skin.

I broke our stare and looked to the ground, feeling of shame overwhelming my entire body. He grabbed my cheeks and raised my head so I could look at him in the eyes.

"I said yes," I replied in a slightly louder whisper.

With that, something happened I will never be able to forget.

His glassy eyes searched through my face as a single, sparkling tear escaped from his right eye and dripped on my hand.

I just made Atlas cry.

✘✘✘