Third update of the week !

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2.1k words

"Real love is unconditional. Any love with limitations is as fraudulent as the person placing them."

Has anyone noticed the quotes match the themes of my chapters 🥺

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I've killed before, twice, in the line of duty.

I've killed to save my own life and the other lives around. But did that make the aftermath any more bearable? No. I always had to see one of the therapists provided when it happened because of the guilt it brought me. I took someone's son away and maybe someone's father—I wouldn't allow myself to dig further into their lives to know—and as someone who lost a parent, that thought haunted me. But I always recovered with time because I knew it was something I had to do.

But with Clovis... I didn't have to do it, in fact I didn't even mean to. I was only trying to knock him off of Ahsoka, hoping he would just become unconscious. But with the rush of adrenaline, I hit him a lot harder than I intended to and it was the first time I killed an unarmed man.

So that is why I was in the state I was in right now, because many might think that as a cop I might be used to something like this and not be affected by it. But that's not the case at all.

Anakin ran his hands through his hair as he looked down at Clovis after Ahsoka explained everything that happened. It was her who had to do it because everytime I tried to explain, I stumbled over my words, barely making any sense. She was still a bit shaken up and her voice was hoarse from the choking, but she was definitely handling it better than I was.

"He deserved it then," Piett spat onto the deceased body and turned to his girlfriend, his angered eyes glued to her bruised neck, "Are you okay?" He gently caressed his fingertips along the bruises, "Do you need something? Ice?"

"I'm okay, I don't need anything," She whispered, looking up into his eyes.

"Yes, he did deserve it," Anakin said lowly, never taking his eyes away from Clovis, "But he's still our boss's son, and he's going to kill us when he finds out about this."

Piett dropped his gaze to the floor and I could see the reality finally sinking into his thoughts now that they're not clouded over by anger over what happened to his girlfriend. Ahsoka too, she swallowed nervously as she looked down at the body.

"Anakin I'm sorry," I whispered with tears filling my eyes again, "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to do this," My voice cracked, "I was scared for Ahsoka and I was only trying to knock him unconsc-"

He was suddenly in front of me, his palms finding their way to my cheeks as he used his thumb to wipe away the tears I hadn't realized escaped, "I'm not mad at you okay?" He said softly, "I'm not mad at you at all."

I blinked in surprise, causing another tear to slide down my face, which he wiped away, "You're not?"

He shook his head, "No."

"But-"

"Stop. You saved my sister and yourself, you did what you had to do," He calmed me down enough to where I was no longer hyperventilating in-between sentences, "And don't worry, you will not be getting in trouble for this. I'll take care of everything, I promise," He dropped his hands down and faced his best friend and sister, "Piett, go erase any security footage that shows what happened—actually erase everything from today. Then call Rex and tell him we need him to dispose of the body. And the story to everyone else will be that Clovis left and we all saw him leave, didn't we?" His gaze shifted between all three of us and we nodded to show we understood, "Good. Ahsoka go to the kitchen and tell the staff to go home, and make sure they take the alley exit. We don't need them coming through here."

They both nodded and rushed to do what he asked of them, "What do you want me to do?" I asked quietly.

He eyed me up and down with an expression I couldn't read, "Go get cleaned up and change out of those clothes, we're burning them."

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I was able to clean myself up in the bathroom upstairs and bandage the large cut on my palm that had still been bleeding profusely - it may need stitches. And the clothes I had to wear were Anakin's that he keeps in his office for days he says he doesn't feel like going home. It was a large white shirt and a pair of plain black basketball shorts.

We didn't burn my clothes like Anakin wanted since it had started to rain outside, and not just a small drizzle either, it was pouring. So they were given to Rex after he wrapped the body and weapon in a tarp and placed it in his car, "Where do you want me to put it?" Rex asked as he tossed the bag of my clothes into his trunk and slammed it shut.

The rain poured down on all three of us, drenching our clothes and hair as we stood in the alleyway and Anakin turned to look at me, "You should go inside, you're going to get sick."

I shook my head as I got closer to him and linked our fingers together to hold his hand, "No, I want to stay with you."

Much to my surprise, he didn't put up an argument and gave his attention back to Rex. But not before squeezing my hand tight as his way of accepting my gesture, which I was worried he wouldn't seeing as he sort of dumped me mere hours ago, "Burn the clothes and put Clovis where he will never be found, he needs to remain a missing person."

The blonde man with a buzz cut nodded as he pulled his keys out of his pocket, "I know a good place, I'll call you when I'm done," He went to walk away, but paused and turned back around, "Also, I already took care of the blood too, just don't go near the area for twenty-four hours so the chemicals remain undisturbed. Not even a blacklight will be able to pick up that there was blood there when it's done." He said he was proud of his work.

"How many times have you done this before?" I asked without thinking. Both him and Anakin turned their gazes in my direction, and I was starting to regret asking, worried my question was too nosey.

Rex then smiled a half-smile, "I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you." He's joking, I'm convincing myself that he's completely joking.

"Rex," Anakin sighed with a head tilt, "Please go, and do what you said and call me when you're done."

"Yes sir," He saluted in a joking manner before giving me a wink goodbye and walking around his car to get into the driver's seat.

"He's strangely calm for doing what he's about to do." I mumbled. Makes me wonder how many times he's done this for Anakin specifically.

Anakin sighed again, "Yeah, he... nevermind, come on let's get you inside." He placed his hand on my back and touched the drenched fabric before leading me inside.

We walked quietly through the empty kitchen that was only half-way cleaned and he pushed open the revolving door that took us into a small hallway which led to the main room of the club. Once we entered, my eyes instantly went to the spot where Clovis once laid, and I felt the guilt in my chest returning.

He may not have been a good person, but I altered the life of so many others by taking away his — and that is where the guilt is the worst.

My attention was pulled away from it when I felt a grip on my wrist, and I looked over to see Anakin inspecting my palm that was wrapped in gauze, it was terribly done and looked like it had been tended to by a child. My hands were shaking when I put it on, so it wasn't my best work. And some of the blood was already seeping out of the sides of the fabric.

"Let's change this and I can take you home, or you can come home with me it's your choice," He said slowly as he walked me to the sink behind the bar. It was just him and I now too, since Piett took Ahsoka home not long after we went outside with Rex

He gently took the gauze off of my hand and tossed it in the trash before holding it under cold running water, "Anakin," I gained his attention since even though he was tending to me, his gaze and mind seemed to be somewhere else, "I just killed someone and you're acting like this is just a normal Monday," I whispered when his eyes were on me, "I feel like there's so much more to you than what you've been telling me." This wasn't the cop talking, not anymore. This was just a woman trying to understand the life of the man she's fallen so in love with.

He dropped his gaze down and took my hand away from the water before gently drying it and wiping away the dried blood from earlier, "You're not wrong (y/n), but the less you know the better." He whispered so quietly that if it wasn't already quiet enough in here to hear a pin drop, I wouldn't have heard him.

"I won't look at you differently," I reminded him.

"She did," He mumbled and paused in his movements when he realized what he said, "Um, I mean-"

"Padme?" There was no way he was getting away from this conversation now, and it was a good distraction for me too.

He closed his eyes for a second before opening them with an exhale and looking straight at me, "Yes, that was the start of the end of her and I. She didn't like or agree with a lot of things I've done and I didn't blame her, I still don't." He glanced down and added the ointment to my palm that was in the drawer next to him.

"I'm not her." I raised my other hand and caressed his cheek, making him sigh with contentment, "You can talk to me, you can tell me anything and I promise I can handle it."

He breathed a chuckle,"You say that now, but if you knew-"

"Anakin, nothing you say will stop me from being in love with you." I finally admitted out loud, and even though it took him a minute, he realized what I said and snapped his eyes back up.

"Did you just say you love me?" He asked in a tone of disbelief as he tightened the gauze around my hand without looking at it.

I nodded as I continued to caress his cheek, tears began to fill my eyes, "You're not the only one who was trying to deny their feelings Anakin, and I don't want to anymore," I choked on my words as a lump formed in my throat. This was my first time truly admitting it out loud, and it scared me, but I didn't care anymore — I was in love with him, more than I've ever loved anyone before and it was strange. I haven't known him as long as I've known anyone else I've ever been with, but these feelings grew stronger and faster than anything I've experienced before, "I'm in love with you and I don't care about anything you've done. I'm not going to leave you." I know that's what he needed to hear, that I won't leave, because that is his biggest fear.

He blinked and a few tears slid down his cheek and he let go of my hand that was now freshly bandaged, before cupping my cheeks, "I love you too (y/n)." He said in a tone filled with so much love that my heart skipped more than one beat.

Moment later, he crashed his lips to mine and grabbed me by the hips. He picked me up and set me on top of the bar before placing himself between my open legs, his lips drifting down to my neck,

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I'm so ready to write the next chapter —> •
If you know what I mean.
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