Dinner begins, the party begins and all to celebrate my just-concluded marriage to Walmoet. The moment we stepped off the altar hand in hand, people kept clapping until we walked into the square. The three white tables expanded to seven large tables, all decorated just a little more festively than this morning. My newlywed husband sits to my right, Novak to my left and the rest of the table is occupied by the other women and important men I don't know.

Unlike breakfast, this time I get to eat all the courses. My empty stomach is happy with that change. The five different dishes, from soup to a stew, and even the cake go to the back. Drinks are no longer sparingly served either. The water and dirty green juices have given way to various wines and fruit liqueurs. I almost feel guilty saying I am enjoying myself.

The conversations at the table are cheerful and everyone seems to have forgotten all the formalities. Even Walmoet has funny stories about his childhood and travels he has made. Curiously, Novak seems to be the only one who does not participate fully in the conversations. He sits next to me somewhat defeated and says little. I can't quite place the reason why he is seated next to me. One would expect Walmoet to want to keep him away from me on the contrary. Walmoet knows well enough what bond I share with Novak.

The moment the tables are cleared and dinner switches to the party, I have enough booze behind my teeth to see the world more blurred. Walmoet pulls me into the temple and onto the dance floor. A trio of elves stand on instruments providing the temple with music. The sun begins to disappear behind the sky. I let Walmoet make me suffer, forgetting reality.

I seem to forget for a second the wedding night that is starting to get closer and closer as soon as Walmoet expertly spins me across the floor. The entire village has settled in and around the temple. The congratulations reverberate around our ears, as does the music. Supplies of booze will have to be replenished after this evening, and the cooking never seems to stop.

The first elves leave the temple late, heading home and to bed. I haven't felt my feet for hours, I've lost the veil somewhere and I've lost count of how many glasses of apple liqueur I've drunk away. Walmoet, Novak, Alisha and many others helped me across the dance floor. Novak tried several times to pull me into a difficult conversation but I don't want to face reality.

'Lady Celeste, will you follow me?' Elia asks in my ear once only about 30 elves are left at the party.

'Where to?' I get released with a double-tongue.

'The night departure for the moon ceremony.' Those are the words that knock me back into reality. I immediately pause and look at her for a moment in silence. Finally, I nod and walk with her to a room I haven't been to before. As soon as the white door opens I look around the room. A huge white double bed stands in the middle of the room. It is a four-poster bed and has a white semi-transparent curtain hanging at the sides. There is another door that will probably lead to a bathroom.

I know which room this is, I know that in the bathroom there is a hatch in the floor that will lead to a secret corridor. On either side of the room is a cupboard. Immediately I understand Novak's comment. The cabinet on the right, that's where the dagger is. I hope to have a moment when I am alone here before Walmoet comes, that one moment.

Elia slowly starts undressing me while I try to remember the whole plan. All the clothes and jewellery I was wearing are taken off and folded. My hair is taken off and even the petticoat is changed to a white nightgown with green lace.

The moment Elia finishes I expect her to bow and leave the room. Instead of what I expect her to do she walks to the door, opens it and stands beside it with her hands behind her back. I look at her questioningly before looking at the wardrobe. I must have that dagger before Walmoet is in here.

'What are you waiting for?' I ask a little more bluntly than planned. She doesn't seem offended by my words and lets out a small laugh herself.

'We are waiting for the eyes of the gods,' she replies with a smile. Panic hits my body with a bang. No, no this can't be. They don't have the same idiotic traditions as in the castle. I can't and won't do that again.

Before I can ask Elia what she means, three men step into the room, none of them Walmoet. The two guards walking in I immediately recognise as the ones who walked up the altar with Walmoet. The other man I recognise very well, Novak.

'What are you doing here?' I ask as my heart pounds in my throat and crying is more closer to me than laughter. Thinking that this is what it is I am tempted to thrust the dagger into Walmoet's heart without question with all eyes on it.

'The king has asked me to be your witness before the gods madam,' he replies as formally as possible. Then the pieces of the puzzle fall together. Walmoet has forced Novak to be my best man, take me to the altar and now be present at this. It explains why Novak sat next to me at the table, why he is in a bad mood and what he wanted to tell me on the dance floor. I should have let him talk, I should have listened.

I want to apologise before Walmoet walks into the room. He too is undressed and shrouded in nothing more than a long white shirt. The grin on his lips speaks volumes. I thought I had him around my finger but he has me around His.

'Well let's get started,' he says grinning as he walks towards me. Elia closes the door and stands next to the three men in a row against the wall opposite the bed. Their heads down, a heavy look on Novak's face. His hands are behind his back and his gaze tries to avoid mine. I automatically take a step back as Walmoet approaches.

'Let the gods bless this marriage with offspring,' says E;ia

'Bless posterity,' the three men repeat against the wall. After those words it becomes silent.

My eye is on the hiding place of the dagger. I never manage to get the thing out of there fast enough to get ahead of the guard. Novak would help me if I make an attempt but he won't manage to single-handedly kill two guards quickly enough so that they don't raise an alarm. Elia is loyal to the king and will definitely raise the alarm, I don't want to kill her. There is no way I can go.

'I thought you'd be more comfortable with the public, you're used to it I've heard,' Walmoet says grinning. In the corner of my eye I see Novak balling his fist. I look at Walmoet irritated. He knows what Christiaan was like, he knows what that night was like and how much I hated it.

'It wasn't exactly something I was hoping to repeat,' I reply as I take another step backwards. Walmoet, in his place, takes a step in my direction.

'You could have known that when you proposed to me,' he grins. I don't want to give him justice, I don't want to embrace the situation but he is right. This was my choice and I knew there was a chance it would happen. It doesn't make the situation easier, nor desirable. I can start resisting now and face a very painful night but that won't help anyone. I can also put all my thoughts aside, forget Novak's presence and make the best of it.

'Right,' I reply. Walmoet stands a metre away from me with his hands behind his back. We both know he and the witness won't leave here without something having happened. He has me in the corner he wanted without even touching me with a hand. I sigh deeply and make a choice of which I am anything but sure.

Walmoet just wants to open his mouth but I am ahead of him. I take two steps in his direction, wrap my arms around his neck and press my lips to his. My thoughts turn black, my emotions disappear into a box. My body grows cold, my eyes dark. My eyes close until I hear nothing but my own breathing.

The stress slowly leaves my body as Walmoet wraps his arms around my waist. I can barely feel my lips sliding over His as he lifts me by my buttocks. I wrap my legs around his waist and feel him walking. Novak's presence begins to fade in my mind.

I expect Walmoet to be hard and rough, starting without foreplay but again he surprises me. He lays me gently on the mattress, letting his hands slide slowly down my legs. His hands are rougher than Novak's, pushing just a little harder against my skin. The taste his tongue gives off reflects wild liquor he's consumed tonight, cherry liqueur.

His hand slides down my inner thigh to where I had actually wanted to keep it away. My hands braided themselves in his white-grey hair as I continue to distract myself by sliding my lips along His.

Abruptly, his fingers slide between my lips targeting my opening, pushing themselves inside. I stop kissing abruptly and look into the two green eyes. I expect pain, discomfort and blood but none of those three come. The just slightly wider fingers than normal begin to move slowly.

Shame hits me with a slap in the face. For the first time in my life, I would rather feel pain than pleasure. I want to deny that Walmoet knows what he's doing, that it feels good, but I can't. I try to cover up the small sound that wants to leave my mouth by kissing Walmoet.

As soon as his fingers start moving harder, I can't hold back something resembling an "mmm". My entire body and brain are in two minds. The realisation that Novak is a few metres away also hits my brain again. I want to push Walmoet away from me but that turns out to be just the moment he moves his fingers slightly.

'Uuhmm,' leaves my mouth without wanting to. My hands grip Walmoet's hair as his lips find my neck. My eyes fall shut of their own accord as I try to keep them open. I don't want to give in to the feeling, much less show what it's doing to me. Walmoet pushes my head aside with his hand to give him more space on my neck. I immediately regret it when I open my eyes for a second.

I seemed to have forgotten for a moment that there were four people in the room, including Novak. The two guards and Elijah turned their gaze to the ground, hands behind their backs. Novak looks my way from under his lashes. The look counting his eyes is not the one I expected to see. Instead of horror and disgust, I see a form of relief.

Long to look at him I thankfully do not have. Walmoet removes his fingers and pulls the nightgown over my head. His own nightgown also falls to the floor next to the bed. I look at him for a brief moment before the man grabs me by the waist, turns around and puts me on my hands and knees. My head faces those four people against the wall. I turn my gaze to the mattress, avoiding Novak's red eyes.

'Enough fuss, time for the real thing.' I can't see it but the grin on his lips is undoubtedly there. Without further notice, my husband pushes in with me. A stab of pain kicks in just as quickly as it stops. I would rather keep that pain than what it gives way to. My mouth falls open, my hands gripping the covers.

I don't know if I will ever be able to look at Novak normally after last night. As soon as Walmoet's hand helps me further towards the place I don't want to go I squeeze my eyes shut stiffly. I knew there was a wedding night, I knew there was a chance people would be watching. What I didn't know was that there was a chance I would enjoy it and that outweighs everything else.