"What are you doing here?" Fen hissed out as he shut the door.

"Was that wolf your former—"

"Why are you here?"

His sharp tone caught me off guard. It shouldn't have; I should've been prepared for it, given how we left things, but I wasn't. I wasn't prepared for the way he stared at me like he was about to scold a child, and I wasn't prepared for the obvious sign of pain that lingered in his eyes.

"I came for you," I admitted. I—"

"No." Fen shook his head.

"No?"

"Go back home, Cronan," he ordered.

"Fen—"

"Go."

I wanted to keep arguing and tell him I wouldn't leave, but I didn't get the chance to when a tiny meow broke free from the carrier perched on the ground beside the foot of the bed. Fen's gaze flickered to the carrier, his resolve faltering for just a second. I saw the way his shoulders tensed, the way his breath hitched when he recognized the sound.

"You—" His voice cracked, disbelief and frustration mixing together. "You brought CJ?"

I nodded slowly, watching him closely. "I thought... maybe you missed him."

For a moment, Fen looked torn, his eyes lingering on the carrier where the small, familiar meow came again. The room grew quiet, except for that soft cry. I could see the war in his eyes, the way he battled with himself over what to do, how much to let in.

"You can't just—" Fen clenched his jaw, turning away from me like the sight of the carrier hurt more than he wanted to admit. "You can't just show up with him and expect things to go back to how they were."

"I don't expect that," I said quietly, stepping closer but stopping when I saw the tension in his posture. "I just... I couldn't leave without trying one last time."

"One last time for what?" Fen asked bitterly, though his eyes never left the carrier.

"For us," I whispered. "And I couldn't leave CJ behind. Not when I know how much you love him."

Fen's hands trembled slightly before he crossed his arms, trying to regain some of his composure. "You don't get to pull me back in, Cronan. Not like this."

"I know," I said, lowering my voice. "But I'm not here to fight. I'm here because... I don't want to lose you."

For the first time since I walked in, Fen looked at me, really looked at me, as if searching for something in my face that would make sense of the chaos between us.

"You don't want to lose me?" He repeated. "I told you I love you, Cronan. I told you that I love you and you basically told me it would never happen. That you could never love me."

I winced at his words. "I didn't— that isn't what I meant. I...Fen, you were never unlovable."

He cracked a dry smile. "Just too complicated for you, right? Can you honestly say you don't feel that way anymore?"

Could I? I'd spent a lot of the time we'd been apart thinking about what happened. Thinking about us.

Taking my silence as an answer, Fen shook his head and turned as if he were about to leave, but I grabbed his wrist before he could.

"Relationships, actual relationships, are not my strong suit," I admitted. "I'm used to cutting people off before things get serious. You telling me you like me...well, it caught me off guard. I didn't want things to change—"

"Goddess, Cronan. Things had already changed!" He ran his hand through his hair. "Things had already changed. From the moment I got here, things have been changing. You went from hating me to sharing a bed with me for Goddess' sake. I'm not saying you can't be afraid, but if you would've sat down and spoken to me then I could've worked with that. I didn't need you to tell me you loved me, Cronan. I just needed a sign that I wasn't crazy and you shot me down every chance you got."

"I know—"

"Do you? You're telling me all this, but let's say I come back. Let's say you and I give it another chance. What are you going to do when things get 'complicated' again because I promise you they will. What are you going to do when things continue to change?" He took a step forward. "Did you come here because you missed me or because you missed your fuck buddy?"

His words cut deep, hitting harder than I expected. I wanted to argue, to tell him that it wasn't like that, that I did miss him, not just the physical part of it. But how could I explain when even I was struggling to sort through the mess of my own feelings?

"I missed you," I said, my voice quieter than I wanted it to be. "Not just that."

Fen's expression hardened. "Do you even know the difference, Cronan? Or are you just saying what you think I want to hear?"

"I'm not—" I stopped, forcing myself to take a breath. "I'm not just saying this. I know I screwed up, Fen, and I don't blame you for being angry. But I came here because I want to fix things, not because I need someone to sleep with."

Fen crossed his arms, not entirely convinced. "Then prove it. Because I'm tired of being the one who keeps putting myself out there only to be pushed away every time things get too real."

I stared at him, knowing he was right but unsure of how to prove it. Every time things had gotten complicated between us, I'd retreated, too afraid to confront what was really going on. Now, looking at the pain in his eyes, I realized how much damage that had caused.

"I don't know how to prove it yet," I admitted, running a hand through my hair. "But I'm here. I'm here, Fen. I'm not going to run this time."

He let out a bitter laugh. "You say that now, but what happens when you get scared again? When I tell you something you don't want to hear? Will you be gone the next morning?"

I shook my head. "No. I swear, I'm not running."

His eyes bore into mine, searching for any sign of a lie. "You say you want to fix things, but can you even give me what I need, Cronan? Can you be more than just some half-in, half-out fling?"

I swallowed hard, knowing this was my moment to be honest, even if it hurt. "I don't know if I'll be perfect at this," I said quietly. "But I'm willing to try. For you."

Fen was silent for a long time, the tension between us palpable. Finally, he sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly.

"Trying for me isn't enough," he murmured, his gaze dropping to the floor. "But I guess it's a start."

I took a hesitant step forward, closing the distance between us. "Then let me start here, Fen. Let me stay, and I'll show you that I'm serious this time."

He didn't say anything at first, but when he finally met my eyes again, there was something softer in his expression. However, it disappeared just as quickly as it had appeared. "If you stay, Cronan, you need to understand something," he said quietly. "I can't go through this again. If you walk away this time... that's it."

"I won't walk away," I promised, my chest tightening as I realized just how much was at stake. "I'm not going anywhere."

Fen gave a small nod, his walls not entirely down but starting to lower. "We'll see," he muttered, turning away slightly. "You've got a long way to go."

It wasn't forgiveness, not yet. But it was a chance—one I wasn't going to waste.

As Fen turned away, I let out a shaky breath, watching his tense figure by the door. I knew this was just the beginning. Everything that happened between us—the hurt, the distance, the unspoken truths—was still there, hanging over us like a storm that hadn't passed yet. But at least now I had a chance to weather it with him.

"I'm not asking you to trust me all at once," I said softly, my voice steadying. "But let me earn it."

Fen didn't respond at first. His back remained turned, his hand lingering near the doorknob as if he were still deciding whether to close the door on me. When he finally spoke, his voice was barely above a whisper.

"You'll have to, Cronan. Because I'm done fighting for both of us."

I nodded, though he couldn't see me. "I understand."

He didn't answer, but the fact that he hadn't kicked me out yet was enough. It was more than I deserved, and I knew it. There was still so much to fix, so much to prove, but at least I was here. I was staying. And maybe, just maybe, that would be enough to start mending what I had broken.