I couldn't remember a time when Nixon and I ever got along. We'd always been like oil and water, never mixing. Every conversation I had with him felt like a new battle in a constant war. I was sure it had to have been annoying to everyone around us over the years—especially Eli.

I typically tried to do whatever was in my power to make Eli happy growing up, but I couldn't get along with Nixon no matter how hard I tried. The man had a way of bringing out the worst in me, which was why his visit couldn't have come at a worse time. Seeing him on top of what happened with Cronan was already a recipe for disaster.

"You just don't stay away, do you?" Nixon muttered with crossed arms as we walked away from the others, including his mate.

I was sure the only reason he remained calm was because he didn't want to make a scene which meant walking away from the others could be a bad idea on my part. Still, I was tired of walking on constantly walking on eggshells.

"I think it's the other way around," I told him.

His eyes narrowed, and I could see the irritation flickering in them, the same old frustration that had always simmered beneath the surface whenever we were around each other. Nixon had a way of getting under my skin like no one else. Even now, with everything that had happened, he managed to rile me up without even trying.

"Don't twist this, Fen," Nixon said, his voice low and controlled, but I could hear the edge in it. "You're the one who always seems to be in places you don't belong."

I clenched my jaw, trying to keep my temper in check. It was the same old dance between us, and I was sick of it. But I wasn't about to back down, not this time. "I'm helping Ambrose, Nixon. You know, doing something useful. Maybe you should try it sometime instead of hovering around like some self-appointed judge."

"Forgive me if I don't believe you. I find it difficult to imagine you willingly helping another person after everything you've done beforehand."

My frustration bubbled and I was half-tempted to snap back, but I didn't. Nolan's words entered my mind and I silently sighed before saying, "I'm sorry."

Caught off guard, Nixon blinked a few times, trying to determine whether I actually just said that or not. "What?"

"I'm sorry," I repeated. "I'm sorry about the attack and what happened in the pack after I left. I'm sorry I hurt you."

He stared at me like I was an alien.

I couldn't blame him for the disbelief, though. Apologies weren't exactly my forte, especially when it came to him. We'd spent so many years at each other's throats that the idea of either of us backing down felt foreign. But I meant it, and as much as it stung my pride to admit it, I needed to say those words.

"I've spent more time than I care to admit thinking about us, you know. The us from childhood all the way to now. You and I have never gotten along, but what I did to you...the attack was too far. You, no matter how annoying you may be, didn't deserve that."

A frown broke out on his face. "Why now? Why are you apologizing now when everything is already over?"

"Because as hard as it might be to believe, I'm trying to improve myself and make amends. I don't want to go my whole life worrying about running into you or what happened in the past. I'm not saying I want us to be best friends, but I don't want to keep going in circles and arguing over the same things every time we run into each other," I explained.

"An apology doesn't mean you get to sweep everything under the rug and forget it happened."

"Trust me. I know that," I said, a bitter laugh breaking out. "If I wanted to sweep everything under the rug, I would have never brought it up in the first place. I'm not asking you to forget, I just needed you to hear that."

"Did something happen to make you suddenly want to change?"

I thought of a certain blue-eyed man and bit my lip. I wasn't ready to share that part of my life with him. "I guess you could say that."

He studied me for a minute. "You've met your mate."

Nixon's words weren't a question but a statement, one filled with the certainty of someone who'd seen this scenario play out before. His eyes narrowed as if he were trying to piece together the puzzle, and I couldn't help the bitter smile that tugged at my lips.

"Is it that obvious?" I asked, though I already knew the answer.

"To anyone who knows you, yeah," Nixon replied, crossing his arms again. "You're not the type to just change your ways out of the blue. But a mate... that's different."

I practically heard the disbelief in his tone. I'd known Nixon long enough to know he likely was wondering how I managed to get a mate in the first place.

The truth of his words hit harder than I wanted to admit. Cronan had been the catalyst for my change, but he wasn't the only reason I wanted to. Not anymore at least. "It's more complicated than that."

"Isn't it always?" Nixon said, his tone softer, almost understanding. It was a rare thing, hearing that from him, and it caught me off guard. Noticing the way I was looking at him, Nixon said, "What?"

"You're a lot calmer than I expected you to be," I admitted. I'd been fully prepared to defend myself this time, unlike when he showed up at Reuben's house unannounced.

He huffed. "Did you really think I'd start throwing punches here, in front of all these kids? I'd do a lot of things, but traumatizing children who've already been exposed to more than they should have isn't one of them."

"And here I thought we were finally finding common ground after all these years," I sarcastically replied.

He scoffed. "Don't get ahead of yourself. Just because we aren't full-on fighting doesn't mean I like you because I don't. I don't trust you either, but I'm not going to keep fighting over the same thing every unfortunate time I see you."

The sharpness in his tone told me he was serious and I slowly nodded. "I understand—"

"That doesn't mean the urge is completely gone though. I look at you and I see the kid who infiltrated my friend's life, tried, and almost succeeded in fucking up my friend's mate bond. I can still remember all the shitty things you'd done over the years that Eli didn't pick up on until it was too late." He smiled wryly. "Did you know there was a brief moment where I wanted to be your friend?"

I frowned. "What? When was this?"

"After I came back to the pack. Eli had told me all about how nice and fun you were to be around and I was looking forward to getting to know you. It wasn't like I had many friends in the pack after everything. However, I got there and the guy I met was nothing like the one Eli told me about. He was cold, rude at times, and only seemed to get worse the longer I knew him."

"You can't say that was only my fault though. You shut everyone out that wasn't family or Eli before they even had the chance to try to befriend you. To me, it looked as if you had no interest in being friends with me and were simply putting up with it for Eli's sake," I pointed out. Nixon didn't respond and a bitter smile broke out on my face. "How did we get here? We might've not gotten along, but there was a time when things weren't this bad."

Nixon's silence spoke volumes, and I could see the gears turning in his head as he processed my words. He looked away for a moment, staring at the ground as if searching for answers in the dirt beneath our feet. When he finally spoke, his voice was softer, almost contemplative.

"I don't know, Fen," he admitted. "Maybe it was a combination of things. My own issues, your attitude, the way we both handled things. We were just kids, trying to navigate everything that was thrown at us. I guess somewhere along the line, we let all that shit turn into something toxic."

Toxic was the perfect word to describe it. To describe me mostly. It was difficult to face him because even though he wasn't a member of the Silver Night anymore, he reminded me of how I let a crush which would never amount to anything other than a friendship take hold of me. Seeing him reminded me of how I let Eli, Nolan, and the pack down along with others which was a tough pill to swallow.

"I don't want it to stay that way," I told him. It was the truth. I didn't want to fall back into the same pattern as before.

"I don't either," Nixon admitted, glancing back to where his partner was. "I want to focus on my mate, pack, and family. Not keeping a feud that should've ended years ago alive."

"I get that."

"Good." He stopped walking. "We should head back before the others start thinking we killed each other or something."

"We should," I agreed, watching as he turned to start walking back. He got a few feet away before I called out to him. "Nixon?"

"What?"

"I know there's no future where you and I will ever be friends, but what does this mean for us? Are we just going to act like strangers?"

He hesitated for a moment before sighing. "I've known you too long for that. We're never going to be friends, but we can be cordial with each other."

Cordial? I could do cordial. "Alright."

He nodded one last time and I watched as he continued walking away. My chest felt lighter in a way. It wasn't like we had completely erased or healed all the wounds we inflicted on each other over the years, but the bleeding stopped and they were finally starting to scar over, and honestly, that was more than enough for me.

AN: Nixon and Fen will have another, deeper conversation in one of the upcoming chapters but after three books, they're finally talking to each other which is an improvement.