i got a
call from
a dad who
I don't know

"hello?"
"Hey my Baby Girl"
"what's up"
"This weather is like pellets"
"like hail?"
"No pellets, but its not raining"

that's when
I knew he was
drunk

I could tell
by the way
he sounded
rough like sand paper

i hung up
I hated when
he drunk called
me

but I
miss him
so god damn
much

nevertheless
I hung out
with a man
who I knew

he is kind
funny
positive
and over all
amazing

one of my
thoughts
stuck with
me all day

'what if he was my dad?'

I felt like
I was cheating
on my given
father

my mom
has her
heart broken
many times

but it's hard to
imagine
what's it's like
to have a
dad

I forgot
how a man
could take care
of his children

fathers are
everywhere

they love
care and
play with
their kids

my dad
loves me
cares for me
plays with me

how come I don't feel it?

he says he
loves me
but I don't
feel loved

he says he cares
he tries to show
support
but he's always
gone

he tries to play
with me
makes efforts to
show interest
with my hobbies

how come I don't feel it?
i can't feel his love
his fatherly love

2017/05/04