After a while, I'm done packing and Jungkook still doesn't know I packed that red bikini. I'm bringing it whether he wants me to or not, even if that means only wearing it to admire myself in the mirror.

Right now we're back at Jungkook's dorm and he's sitting at his desk while I look for some sort of snack.

"How many hours until we leave?" I ask again and Jungkook smiles a little.

"We need to be out the door by 8am tomorrow morning," he informs me for the fifth time in the last hour. "You're excited, huh?"

"Of course," I grin and sift through his cabinets.

"I think you'll have a lot of fun," he says from his chair.

"I hope so." I pause and huff.

"Hm?" He asks and I turn around to see him still facing his desk.

"You don't have any food." I make my way over to him.

He spins in his chair and faces me, "I have plenty in there."

"Not good food," I pout.

"Hey, I told you it wouldn't be a good idea to come back to my dorm. But who insisted?"

"I didn't think I'd be starving."

He shrugs, "That's on you, babe, I said you'd be hungry and I wouldn't have any snacks. If you want, we can go out or something."

"I just need a snack," I sigh, "I'm probably stress eating."

"I dunno what to tell you, then," he rests his jaw in his hand, "You'll just have to suffer, I guess.

"Jungkook, I'm starving~" I whine childishly, "I'm gonna die~~"

"You're not gonna die, you had lunch like two hours ago." He chuckles.

"Fine. I'll just head over to one of your friends' dorms," I shrug and spin on my heel to turn around.

But I'm pulled back by my wrist, "Why? Can't you go to, I don't know, Jessie's instead?"

I smirk and put my hand on my hip, "Well your friends are closer."

"So?"

I laugh, "You're really being jealous over your own friends now?"

"What? No." He scoffs, "I'm like, anything but jealous. I'm really the opposite of jealous."

"Really? So I can go over to Yoongi's dorm right now to get a snack? Cause there's nothing else in your cabinet that sounds good."

"Are you saying you like his cabinet better than mine?" He accuses and I put my hands on his shoulders gently.

"No, I'm saying I'm going to Yoongi's now to get some food. And you're not gonna be jealous or anything like that, right?" I slide my hands up to cup his perfect face.

"Right, right," he nods, "I'm not the jealous type anyway, so uh, have fun I guess. B-But not... You know," he looks up into my eyes cutely, "too much fun."

I smile and lean down to kiss him, connecting our lips chastely. I pull back after a moment but his lips follow until I lightly push him back with a giggle, "You're so cute."

"Cuter than all my friends?" He bats his lashes.

"Stop being so jealous," I giggle again and walk to the door, "I'll be back in a little bit."

"Mhm," he tilts his head and looks at me with a soft gaze, "Bye."

I leave and walk down the hall to Yoongi's dorm, but right as I come up to it, I stop to listen.

"Oh fuck, oh fuck," a woman's voice moans and I stifle a laugh as I pull away from the door.

It is the last day before spring break, it doesn't surprise me that he's getting some right now.

At least they're both enjoying themselves.

I walk further down the hall and come up to Seokjin's dorm instead. After putting my ear to the door, I hear nothing, so I knock.

A few seconds later, he opens the door, "oh hey, El, what's up?"

"Do you have snacks?" I ask right away.

"Yeah," he lets me in, "Why? Did you run out?"

"Jungkook doesn't have any," I go straight to his cabinet and open it.

"Oh," he sits down on his couch as I sift through the snacks and silence fills the room.

"You like Jungkook, right?" He asks after a minute.

"Uh, yeah?" I can't help the giggle that comes out at the sudden question, "why?"

"Just wondering," he shrugs, "I guess it's because I kind of..." He trails off at the end and I can't hear the rest of what he says.

"Hm?" I see a bag of pretzels up at the very top.

"Nothing, it doesn't matter."

"No, really," I step up on my toes and lean over the counter slightly with my arm outstretched but it's too high up.

Suddenly he's right behind me and I see his arm reach up further than I can to grab the small bag of pretzels. He sighs quietly and hands me the snack, "If you liked someone, would you tell them?"

"Probably," I laugh awkwardly.

"So, if this someone was semi-close to you, could there be a way of saying you like them without using words? You could just go up and kiss them, right?"

"Well, no. Randomly kissing someone probably wouldn't be a good route."

"Don't act like you've never spontaneously kissed someone."

"I've never done that," I scoff.

"You did it to Jungkook," he furrows his brows.

"What? Are you crazy?" I ask him, slightly offended.

"Your first kiss with him," he crosses his arms over his chest.

I blink a few times, are you stupid? "You weren't there the first time we kissed."

"It was at the party!" He tells me, "You were talking with me for a long time, I really thought I'd get to know you even more, but then you said you had to go, and you just gave Jungkook a surprise kiss right on the mouth!"

"Are you nuts? That didn't happen!" I deny, knowing for a fact that I would've remembered- oh my gosh. 'remembered'

"W-Was that the night that I was..." I uncross my arms, "drugged?"

His mouth falls open at the realization and I feel sick to my stomach. "I, um, I have to go. Th-Thanks for the pretzels."

"No, wait!" He tries to stop me but I'm already out the door.

I rush to Jungkook's dorm, throw open the door, and quite aggressively close it behind me when I'm in.

He spins around in his chair to face me, "...Did you not find any food at Yoongi's?"

"No," I toss the pretzels onto the counter, suddenly not hungry at all, "I went to Seokjin's instead because Yoongi was busy."

"Soooo......" He carries a confused expression, "are you okay?"

"Do you mind reminding me about our first kiss?" I bite my lip and look at him expectantly.

"Uh, are you really forgetting it?" He stands up and walks over to me.

"Yeah, you know what, I think I am," I look at him seriously.

"We went to see the view from the top of that building..." He reminds me, "the elevator broke and we were stuck up there all alone."

"Hm. Really?" I fake a believing smile.

"Yeah," the corners of his mouth quirk upward and he begins to lean forward but I stop him with a finger at his lips.

"How about you remind me about our actual first kiss."

The corners of his mouth drop and he sighs, looking down at the ground.

"Anything come to mind?" I ask, "Any party in particular?"

"Seokjin told you, didn't he?"

"Yes," I snap, "You really thought I wouldn't find out?"

"It never came up in conversation!" He defends himself.

"What, so you just thought you'd keep this one to yourself until I finally asked about a kiss that I didn't know even happened?!"

He's silent and I bite the inside of my cheek, shifting my weight to one leg. "You told me nothing happened at all that night."

"I know," he admits his wrong, "And I should've told you, but-"

"What else did we do?" I ask and clench my jaw.

"Nothing. Nothing happened after that, I just put you to bed and you know the rest."

"Who am I to believe you?"

"I wouldn't lie to you, Ellie."

"Really? Because you just did!" I roll my eyes, "You lied about our first kiss just a second ago, how many other lies are there?"

"Calm down," he pinches the bridge of his nose.

"No! I'm not calming down until I get the entire story. I don't care if it's from one of your friends, or you, but it better be the truth this time," I demand.

"Look, we know Calvin is the one to drug you. All I did was bring you back to your dorm and put you to sleep."

"Yeah? And when did that kiss happen?"

"I was talking to some girl and you came over looking drunk, then you kissed me. I stopped you, and that's all that happened," he states like it's a fact and comes a little closer.

I back away and my voice gets quieter, "First my tattoo and those pictures, now this? How many other things are you hiding from me?"

"Nothing," fear flashes over his eyes for a split second, "I promise, I'm hiding nothing from you."

"Are you sure? Because last time you seemed pretty positive about it, too. Tell me the full truth, what happened that night?"

"From start to finish?" He asks and I nod.

He sighs and gently grabs my hands, leading me to his couch to sit down. "I didn't see Calvin spike your drink, but you came over to me looking a little unstable. When you kissed me, I was shocked and stopped you because at the time, you still hated my guts," he explains, "and I knew you wouldn't kiss me of all people if you were sober. But when you said you only had a couple drinks, I put the pieces together that you were roofied."

I listen and watch him, looking for any signs of lying but I'm not seeing any so far. Then again, I guess I suck at recognizing when someone lies.

"We got to your dorm, and you know how you are when you're drunk."

"Being drunk isn't being drugged. I swear on my life if you're about to say we-"

"Let me finish," he interrupts and I stay quiet. "You were really similar to how you are when you're drunk. You didn't take out your keys from your back pocket, so I got them out for you. We went inside and you tried getting handsy because you're hornier than lust herself when you're drunk, and in this case, roofied."

I gulp and listen more, staying silent as he carries on.

"I said you needed to go to bed, and you didn't want to, but I got you there anyway and left. But not even ten seconds later, you ran out of the dorm and yelled 'don't leave me' at the top of your lungs," he sighs, "so I started walking to your dorm to put you back in bed, but you wanted me to carry you instead, so that's what I did. After covering you up again, I tried going to the couch but you jumped on me because I didn't listen to you when you said to sleep next to you."

"I really did that?" I cringe at myself. Hearing about my past drunk experiences with him, I can confirm that this all sounds like something I would do. Needing him with me, not letting him go, being stupidly childish, etc... Gosh why am I so needy for him when I'm not sober?

"Yeah," he nods, "and then you kicked me off the couch and I put you back in bed again. You made me say I wouldn't leave you, and then I got on the other side of the bed. You tried convincing me I should sleep like a normal person and take my shoes and jacket off and get under the covers, but it's not like I was gonna make that mistake. After a while, Jessie came in and saw you next to me. She was about to go off but I convinced her nothing happened, and she left. Later, Becca came to the door and looked pissed, then left, then after you woke up and Jessie visited again, I explained."

"Wow." I sigh and let my face fall into my hands.

"Do you still not believe me?" He leans back and lets his head roll onto the back of the couch as his eyes close.

"I don't know."

"I just told you everything that happened," he looks up at the ceiling with a blank face.

"How do I know that?" I turn and glance at him.

"You don't, that's our problem," he lifts his head to look at me in the eyes, "You know I wouldn't do something like that. I might be an asshole, but I don't take advantage of people."

"I'm sorry." I whisper, now feeling absolutely awful.

"It just hurts to think you'd think that low of me," he crosses his arms over his chest, "I mean I thought this was all settled."

"I'm sorry," I apologize again.

"And I'm sorry for not telling you this sooner."

"It's okay. I should've trusted you," I let my face fall to my hands again and I pull my knees up to my chest.

"Back to square one," he sighs and stands up.

"What are you saying?"

"Well I can't just be your boyfriend now, I have to earn all of your trust back," he runs his hand through his hair in frustration.

"Baby, don't say that," I stand up with him, "I trust you. I trust you so much," I wrap my arms around his waist but he doesn't look down at me because his eyes are closed, "I was the stupid one here, okay?"

"No you weren't, I should've told you."

"I'm serious, this is my thing; I jump to conclusions. I should really work on myself before I drag you into my own insecurities."

"So you believe me then?" He asks with innocent doe eyes.

"Yes, of course. You're the best thing that happened to me," I rest my head on his chest and hear his heartbeat, "I'm not leaving you."

"Are you sure? I'm a pretty shitty boyfriend."

"Remember that night you drank yourself stupid and I came over and cleaned your dorm with you?"

"Mhm," he closes his eyes and holds me tighter.

I reach down and grab his pinkie finger, hooking it with my own, "We made a promise not to leave each other. When times get tough, this matters."

He let's out a relieved sigh so quiet it would've gone unnoticed if it weren't for the thick silence in the room.

I hear his heartbeat slow down the longer we stand in the silence and it calms me down to hear him calming down, too. "So you're not leaving?" He asks quietly.

"No, of course not," I look up at him and our eyes meet, "this is what a relationship is. Ups and downs. As long as we get over the hurdles, it'll be okay."

He nods and pulls me in again, resting his chin on my head.

•••••••••••••

Wowza that was a lot, huh?

What's your favorite snack?

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