A/N: Have you ever struggled  hard to  forgive someone? Have you succeeded to forgive them, how?

Sometimes we appreciate only the things we’re used to see, just like the only moon in the dark sky my eyes are gazing right now. What if there was more than one moon in the sky and only one star?

I leave a long breathe and look at Fiona sleeping under the blanket of moonlight peacefully, her lips pressed in a small smile.
I used to think only people in TV always fake sleeps with a smile over their face before I discovered Fiona does the same. If I could see how I do I look like while sleeping, I bet I’d find myself as a twin of a sleeping hippopotamus.

I stand up carefully not making a sound and walk downstairs towards the kitchen as my thirsty throat guides me to. I haven’t even passed a night in Louis’ house and I’m already hovering like a zombie inside the house at 3 am. Hope I don’t scare Johannah or Louis in this early morning.

Before I could switch on the light of the kitchen, my eyes widen watching a darker shade of a person through the window. It takes me no moment to realize it’s Louis in the garden watching the messed up hairstyle. I take a water bottle from the fridge and walk towards the garden.
I stop just beside him and sigh looking at the burning cigarette between his index and middle finger. He shakes it so that ashes are brushed off before he places it between his lips, leaving a huge amount of smoke afterwards.

“It’s quite late, why haven’t you slept yet?” He asks not looking at me, his eyes still on the empty road outside the gate.

“Have you heard those ancient love lines where the girl says what can you do for me and the boy replies that he can do anything, he’d sacrifice his heart for her, even his life? Well, in your case, you need someone who can say that they can sacrifice lungs for you!” I look at him annoyingly and he looks back, a half smile over his lips.

My whole body covers with goosebumps when I gaze at his blue eyes which is shining brighter than anything in the sky. My unmanageable eyes rack to his lips and then look down after I found his widen eyes on me.

“Don’t smoke please, it’s stinky.” I coo looking down at my moving feet. “You still haven’t asked anything about Fiona which is making me so curious.”

It really is making me curious that he hasn’t asked me about Fiona or Derick, especially about Fiona. It’s not unusual for people asking me about Fiona being my child and dragging lots of whispers when they know I’m a single mother. It’s the kind of society I live in where men are pitied when they’re a single father but women are thrown nasty whispers when they’re found as a single mother. And we say we are the survivors of 21st century and talking about equal rights.

“She called you mom that means you are, nothing more I guess I want to know or think.” He chuckles before making another smoke ring by his lips, letting it mix away with the air just like the expression on his face.

“Have you told Oren that I’m……………….”

“Reen!” He cuts me off rolling his eyes and looks at me, cupping my shoulders with his hands. “You’re my friend and I don’t need to give anyone a flying f……..hell and explain why you’re staying with me, got it?”

“She asked me where I’m a while ago and I said the truth. I’m glad she’s not pissed off of it. Maybe just because I left all my ice creams in the fridge and she can have them all alone now.” I coo shaking the water bottle in my hand sadly and then giggle when I see Louis smiling.

I made him smile.

We both look at the door when someone’s sudden appearance pushes us apart.

“You were smoking, right Louis?” Johannah asks looking at Louis with her sleepy eyes boldly.

He opens and closes his mouth a few times after crashing the burning cigarette with his toms. He clears his throat and walks towards Johannah, keeping a fair distance so that his smelly breath his far away from her.

“No, I was just going to bed, good night mum.” He stutters before quickly making his way inside the house, making me stand here with Johannah alone.

“He has never realized what he’s doing to himself until someone made him realize.” Johannah sighs sadly and half smiles looking at me. “It’s nice to meet you again Reen.”

“How would you know I’m Reen? I’m not even wearing my glasses.” I laugh surprisingly.

“Because I have seen a genuine smile in my son’s face after a lengthy period so it’ didn’t take me long to comprehend who you’re.”
She smiles patting my shoulders and then walks inside.

I shake my head looking at the ground and smile. Maybe there’s a lot of people to make me feel unworthy but as long as a few number of people is here to make me smile, I don’t worry about the rest of the world.

“What the…………….” I squeal and look above when something hits the back of my head.

I look above only to discover Louis leaning on the window frame in his room, his head slightly cocked up on a side just like the smirk on his lips. He crosses his arms above his chest placing the burning cigarette between his lips and gestures me to read the paper he has thrown.

I shake my head in annoyance and roll my eyes before picking up the crooked paper ball from the ground. The corner of my lips are instantly dragged in a smirk after reading what he has wrote. I look above but he isn’t at the window anymore.

“Walking dead at 3:15 am, not a bad idea when I can make some caramel popcorns for both of us.” I sing to myself before walking fast towards the kitchen.

Before I can scream on the top of my lungs forgetting I’m not the only living thing in this green planet, Louis’ warm palm is pressed against my lips and my lower back pressed against the cold counter.

“Why the f……….hell you scream so much like you’re auditioning for scream queen!” He whispers keeping his lips only a few inches away from mine which are still secured under his palm, thankfully.

“What else can I do when you didn’t even bother to switch on a light? Who knew you’re the walking dead here!” I whisper back when his hands slid down from my lips.

I see him opening his lips and closing it again and again, flickering his hands in the air like he’s in a debate competition. He rolls his eyes and sighs before I hear him uttering “You’re the most impossible thing I’d ever possibly know.”

“Okey then, watch the movie alone Loubear.” I chuckle sadly and step behind shrugging my shoulders. “You don’t have to ruin your midnight movie time with an impossible thing.”

“What did you just call me?” I look at him blankly and my mouth starts to dry out watching him stepping forward with a firm jaw, his eyes widen and shining more than the utensils hanging beside me.

“L……..Louis William Tomlinson.” I smile nervously but it fades away when I see his eyebrows cock up as he caresses his palm with one another managing to keep the same look on his face.

“Are you sure?”

Before I can understand, I’m running fast towards my room with a fast running Louis behind me. I peck over my shoulders for a moment and a giggle skips my lips when I see him struggling with the wire of a lamp which is around his leg now. I stop and bend down closing my eyes, taking long breathes.

“You know what’s the trick to be the winner of a competition?” My breath hitches when I find two hands on my waist, his warm whispers hitting the side of my head. “Never turn around or stop even if your competitor is weaker than you.”

When I intend to turn around, I’m stopped and my bare feet are swiped away from the floor.

“What are you doing Louis!” I whisper yell spanking his bums continuously when he hangs me over his shoulders.

“Do you even have any idea how much intimate it is? The thing you’re doing right now?” He tells stopping for a while, slapping my butt back with a bit force.

“Oh Mr. Explicit now let me stand on my feet!” I roll my eyes and then squeal the next moment when he nearly throws me on the middle of his bed once we’re inside his room.

“You need to be careful with your words Reen.” He sighs before grabbing the remote of the TV which is hiding almost two third of the wall beside it.

“And you should be careful with your actions with your friend, with me.” I tell looking down.

“I don’t know Reen, I don’t know.” He bites his bottom lip sitting beside me on the bed once our eyes meet. “I really don’t know what you are to me. The only thing I know you make me feel comfortable.”

“But I’m impossible, Oren is possible anyway.” I chuckle, perfectly ruining the moment on purpose.

I’m falling for him and I’ve to stop myself before the reality hits me hard like falling on the coldstone floor. The reality that Louis and Oren likes each other.

“Yeah, she’s a possible thing for me. Such a nice sister you have, Reen.” Louis nods looking down and smiles.

“Don’t break her heart okey?” I ask before taking my lips between my teeth. “She means the world to me and I know you won’t.”

“I won’t.” He nods before tapping the play button in the remote.

Listening to my mind may give me impermanent blues but listening to my heart now wouldn’t be a great idea if I want an unblemished future for all of us.