Sorry for the late post. I had two finals yesterday: Math & English and I've been freaking out. Then I have Science & History on Monday, then Latin on Tuesday, then Wednesday is my last day of school. I'm so excited. I have to study a lot now, though. I have to ace these finals!

Anyway, sorry to Whispered Secrets fans. I'll upload it as fast as possible and the next chapter is going to possibly be in Caleb's point of view! :] Anyway, enjoy!

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Chapter Five 

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Three months passed. I turned twenty, Michael turned seven, a whole Shadow Pack family was slaughtered and nineteen hunters paid the price.

I only visited Xavier’s grave once a week now, but only with an escort. It was always either Zane or Jamie. They had become ridiculously protective of me since Xavier and Darren died and even more so after I had gotten shot in the raid.

The raid. It was violent and created a sea of blood. Jeb and I had led it. After the hunters had barged into the McCarthy’s home and killed the whole family – mom, dad and two children, both under the age of eight – in the middle of the night, we had tracked down the hunter’s base, which was forty miles north.

I had thought that after killing over three hundred hunters in the battle at Springfield, that the Circle would’ve gotten message to leave the Shadow, Midnight and Moon Pack alone. But no – they decided to still send in more people to slaughter our kind. I wondered how many husbands, mothers, daughters and sons were from the Circle were getting killed every night.

This war…it was pointless. The Circle suffered just as much as we did – with their new weapons, we were even in match and the casualty rates were high. The leaders of the Circle were sending in new recruits. Some of them could’ve had a bright future ahead of them and others could already have family. If they died, what would become of their wives or husbands or children?

With these thoughts in mind, I had run through the thick expanses of trees with ten Offenders plus Jebadiah to get to the hunter’s base. I had to remind myself that I had Michael to go home to – I was his mother. Whenever I went out to fight the hunters, I had to make sure I took care of myself, so I could come back home to my family.

The warehouse was dark when we had gotten there. Naturally, the Alpha went in first, then the Beta. The top floors were empty, but there was the soft sound of music playing from the basement. We expected armed men ready to take us out at the bottom of the stairs, but instead we had found half-drunk hunters trying to have a good time.

It was a massacre. They had tried fighting back, but all nineteen men died that night. The names were found and the bodies were anonymously sent back to their families. Maybe it had been unnecessary to kill them when they did not have the upper hand, but all of us had been able to smell the blood of the McCarthy’s on their skin.

Only some of us had gotten injured, me included. I was shot in the back, but it didn’t puncture my spine, thankfully. The bullet had been taken out quickly and I was already healed by now, save for the new scar marring my skin. I already had a lot of them, so another one didn’t really make much of a difference.

In the three months, I had also seen a lot of Tristan. Every time I went out, I saw him at every corner. He lived in town and I wondered why I had never seen him before in the years before the battle. Now I was seeing him everywhere. I didn’t know what to think about that – did he really like me so much? Was he following me around? Or was it just merely a coincidence.

What I did know was that I could not tell Jebadiah about Tristan. He would be six feet under within twenty-four hours and I didn’t want to be responsible for the murder of an innocent human.

“Cade?” Lily called. “It’s almost four. Shouldn’t you be on your way by now?” she asked, opening my door and walking into the room. She found me in my underwear and strapless bra, staring into the mirror at the dozens of scars on my body. Lily paused and closed the door behind her. “Isn’t it a four hour drive, sweetie? It’s going to be late by the time you get there if you go any later,” she told me.

I sighed. Every time Lily talked to me now, I felt like a child. She was only five years older than me though. She used to be intimated by me before, but now that she had ascended into her Alpha Female position, she made me feel like I was just a kid. I don’t think she even knew she was doing it, but the motherly way she spoke made me angry. Why couldn’t she just be a little mean to me? I had slept with her mate over a hundred times, literally. Jebadiah and my relationship had been full of hot, sweaty nights. So why did she still treat me so kindly? At rare times, I wanted to hate her for taking that kind of love away from me, but I couldn’t. 

“I don’t know if I can stand being around Holly or Parker,” I said softly.

I couldn’t see Lily’s expression since I was staring at my reflection so I didn’t know what she was thinking at the moment. She walked closer and then passed me, going to my closet. She looked through the clothes and picked out the purple dress that I had bought when I was out shopping with Kristen.

“Why is that?” she asked as she tossed me the dress. I caught it with one hand and looked at it like it was a whole new species. Lily sat down on my bed and stared at me expectantly. “Well, put it on.”

Why I had to wear a formal dress to go visit my siblings was beyond me, but I wore it anyway. There was a bullet wound scar on my shoulder, but it was small, so I didn’t mind. I just didn’t like the marks on me that were inflicted by knives. “Holly is pregnant,” I finally told Lily.

Lily pressed her lips together as understanding dawned on her face. “I see.”

Picking up a brush, I ran it gently down my hair. The black curls unwind and straightened as the bristles tugged it, but as soon as the brush was taken out, the locks of hair bounced back into its original position. “It’s hard seeing Natalie with her child and Holly with Giovanni and even you and Jebadiah. It just reminds me that I can’t ever have that now,” I said softly.

“That’s not true,” Lily whispered.

The dry, humorless laugh left my lips without my permission. Lily flinched a little at the cold sound. “It is and you know it. Xavier is dead, isn’t he?”

“You can try with a human,” Lily suggested quietly.

I laughed harder. “Lily, I can’t have a child with a human. I’m the Beta. Hybrids can’t shift. I need an heir and who’s going to follow a Beta who can’t shift?”

“This pack would follow you to the end of the world, Cade. They’d do the same for your child,” Lily argued.

“This pack,” I sneered, “has a reputation. “I’m not going to let my selfish reasons ruin that.” I grabbed my bag and stuffed some clothes in there. This room was suddenly too suffocating. “Tell Jebadiah that I’ll be back tomorrow,” I said over my shoulder, slipping on my flats and beginning to run down the stairs. I found Michael watching TV with some of the other children and I hugged him from behind. “Mom is going to visit Uncle Parker and Aunt Holly, okay?” I asked, pressing my cheek to his.

“Can I come?” Michael asked hopefully.

I paused and looked over my shoulder. Lily was standing on the top of the staircase. She gave me a nod and disappeared down the hallway. “Sure, but you have to do everything I ask you,” I said.

“Alright, Mom,” he got up, beaming at me. The other kids looked at me with desperate looks in their eyes.

“Why can’t I come, too?” a four year old named Gabriel demanded.

I reached over and ruffled his brown hair. “I don’t think your mom will let me take you,” I said, smiling gently.

He crossed his arms over his chest. “No fair!”

Life isn’t fair, I thought sullenly. Then looked up as I caught Lily’s scent getting stronger and stronger. She was holding some of Michael’s clothes in her hands.

“Here,” she said softly, putting them in my bag. “I’ll tell Jeb that you took him with you.” She rested her hand on my arm. “Be safe,” Lily told me, then turned and walked off.

I watched her go silently and took Michael’s hand, waving bye to the others before walking to the car. He crawled in the backseat and put on his seatbelt and I climbed in the front, starting up the jeep. I looked through the rearview mirror at Michael.

“Want me to put on some music?” I asked him.

He turned his head away from the scenery outside and smiled at me. “Okay, Mom.” The joy in his face made me forget about everything bad, everything I’d never have and I turned back to the road.

~

I parked my car in front of the mansion and hopped out, looking up at my old home. It looked exactly the same. There were no changes and that left a bitter taste in my mouth. I wish they would’ve renovated it, so this place didn’t make all those awful memories slam back painfully into my mind.

Michael threw the car door open and jumped out with me, looking excited. I had called Hayden to tell him that they were going to have an extra guest and he hadn’t minded. I was glad, because I had called him an hour into the trip. Michael had already been here a few times as well and he really seemed to like the place, so he was jumping on his toes in excitement. He had made some friends in the Midnight Pack.

“Cade.” When Hayden saw me, his eyes lit up and he ran down the front steps to come over and hold me. I hugged him back and yelped a little when he lifted me off my feet. “I’m glad you got here with no problems,” he told me, smiling sweetly.

Putting my arms around him so I wouldn’t fall, I chuckled. “Hey Hayden,” I greeted. His hair was growing and it tickled my skin.               

“How have you been these days?” he asked, setting me down and strolling over to lift up Michael, carrying him upside down. My boy laughed delightfully. “And how is the little man?” Hayden grinned as he put Mike upright, but still kept holding him.

Michael tried to be serious. “I’m seven now, Hayden, I’m not little anymore,” he told him simply.

Hayden laughed and ruffled his hair. “Oh, I’m sorry big man.”

Scowling, Mike wiggled out of his arms and ran up to the large doors. I couldn’t even get a word out before Michael disappeared into the mansion. I sighed.

“He’s a good kid,” Hayden said, coming over to stand next to me.

I nodded. “Yeah I know,” I said softly.

“Have you ever wondered about his birth parents?” he asked me, turning his head to look at me from the side with compassionate eyes.

“Yeah. And I’m sorry they couldn’t watch him grow up, but…I’m glad that I’m his mother now.” I angled my body towards him.

Hayden smiled and put his arm around me. “Come on, let’s go inside. We have to go see what kind of trouble Michael is getting into.”

I smiled weakly and looked up at the open doors. I took a deep breath and walked inside to face my siblings.