Kabanata 16

"Sana sa susunod na i-hack mo man ang account ko, sana pinagkalat mo na rin na maganda ako."

"Ayoko mapagkamalang nagpapakalat ng fake news." Etienne countered back. He didn't lift his head and continued tapping his table using his pen.

Umirap naman ako habang nagso-solve kami sa genmath. Nahihilo na ako dahil sa mga pinagsasamang numero at letra. Pinaghiwalay pa sila kung pagsasamahin din naman pala sa genmath? Ang corny, ampota.

I didn't entered STEM for the mathematic classes. I was here because I wanted to enter the medical field. Kung pupuwede nga lang na puro science lang ang kuhanin ko sa strand na ito ay baka ginawa ko na. I loathe math and I wasn't good at it. At alam ko na marami rin ang ganito sa STEM.

Sure, there are people who excelled in math and it's a big advantage for them because most of our subjects are inclined with mathematics. And even our science subjects have mathematics in them!

Nakakadugo ng utak sa totoo lang.

I am not the type to enter extracurricular activities. Iniiwasan ko mga ito dahil hindi rin naman talaga ako mahilig magpa-iwan sa klase. I would rather sleep, go on a jog or even shop in a mall just to kill some time.

My forehead knotted upon seeing the logarithmic function and exponential function.

Mukha naman siyang madali e, madaling ibagsak.

"Kaya mo na 'yan i-solve mag-isa, malaki ka na." I wrote down. Nakarinig ako ng mahinang pagtawa.

Nilingon ko si Etienne na may maliit na ngiti sa labi. He was subtly glancing at my side. Nakita ko rin na patago n'yang pinapakita ang papel n'ya.

Ang yabang? Pakialam ko kung tapos na siya agad?

"Yabang mo," nilabi ko sa kan'ya. Etienne shook his head and exposed his paper at me.

"Oo na, tapos ka na." I scoffed. Pumalatak si Etienne nang ibalik ko ang atensyon ko sa papel ko.

After the excruciating test, saka ko na-realize na pinapakopya n'ya ako kanina. I just didn't copy his answers because I thought he was trying to show it off.

Okay lang. I'd rather have low scores than gain high grades from my classmate's hardwork.

"Lavy, saan ka pupunta?" Etienne asked, following me like a puppy. Napangiti naman ako, I guess old habits die hard.

"SSG Office."

"Kasama si Gio?" Etienne scoffed.

"Kuya Gio. He's a year older!" saway ko sa kan'ya.

"Do you like. . ." Etienne pursed his lips, he sounded frustrated. "Him? Do you like his company?"

"Not really but he reminds me of CL." I honestly said. Natigalgal ako ng ilang minuto dahil sa mga binitiwang salita ko.

Etienne stiffened. Agad siyang umiwas ng tingin. "CL, huh?"

Base sa reaksyon n'ya, matagal na silang hindi nagu-usap ni CL. He sounded distant and the way he spoke of his name made me feel like CL did something to him.

"Pareho lang silang mabait, Etienne. Hindi ko naman gusto si Gio. . ." I assured him.

And I don't why I had to. Hindi nagsalita si Etienne at iniwanan ako matapos no'n. Everything was going well between us until. . .

"Hi Lavy!" Gio greeted when I entered the SSG office. Si Icarus naman ay nagtitimpla ng kape. May nagdala pala ng electric kettle at mga 3-in-1 coffee para sa amin. Kadalasan ay si Icarus ang tirador ng mga ito.

"Gusto mo? Ititimpla kita." Icarus asked, opening the sachet of coffee.

"Okay lang ako," I declined.

"Lavy, kaano-ano mo si Etienne?" Gio asked nervously. It was almost out of nowhere.

"Boyfriend mo ba?" Gio laughed. "Sana boyfriend mo. Kung di mo boyfriend, sana gawin mo na siyang boyfriend. Don't be shy, gawin mo ng boyfriend."

He was saying almost incoherent things. Halata na balisa at parang kabado.

Nangunot ang noo ko. "Bakit?"

"E kasi type 'yata 'yong. . ." Gio halted his words. "Kaklase ko."

"Type?" my eyes turned to slits.

May type si Etienne?

Well, it made me shock for a bit. I never heard him being interested in a girl. At hindi ko rin alam kung totoo nga dahil bakit hindi ko alam? Bakit may nililigawan na pala siyang hindi ko kilala?

I only learned it through Gio that apparently Etienne is being paired with someone else in another strand. At kahit sa bagong account ko sa Facebook ay tina-tag ako ni Etienne sa mga edited nilang pictures.

He must have really liked the girl for me to be this pissed off. I bit my lower lip as I looked towards the girl who's being linked to him.

Pauletta Jayne Angeles.

"She's nice." I heaved a breath.

I don't know why would I care this much if Etienne does like this girl. Hindi naman matapobre ang mga magulang ni Etienne. At mukha naman na hindi rin masama 'yong babae. She even looked innocent and she's obviously not after his wealth or anything.

Nang maabutan ko si Etienne na mag-isa ay agad ko siyang kinausap tungkol dito.

If he likes her, I'll probably even help him. Kahit para bang hindi sumasangayon ang kalooban ko. I feel bad for the girl. That's it! I just know that Etienne is not for those who have faint hearts. Sa sobrang kumplikado n'yang tao ay hindi talaga siya para sa lahat.

I feel bad for justifying what I feel. Hindi kasi pupuwede na may iba siyang gusto. Hindi p'wedeng gusto ko rin siya. It just feels wrong somehow.

"Etienne, gusto mo ba si Paulene?" I asked. I learned her name through Gio, bukambibig n'ya kasi ang pangalan nito.

"And what if I do?" Etienne asked.

"Hala gagi, huwag." I uttered with a shock expression.

"What the fuck?"

"Masisira future no'n." I panicked. "I mean, sayang naman kung sa 'yo siya mapupunta 'no!"

"Nagseselos ka ba, Lavy?" Etienne chuckled which made me flushed. Ako? Magseselos? At bakit?

"Kung sasabihin ko bang oo. . ." I shyly looked away. "Iiwasan mo na si Paulene?"

Umiling si Etienne. "Nah, baka lapitan ko pa lalo."

"What the hell?" Bumusangot ako sa kan'ya. "At bakit?!"

"I don't know? I like seeing you jealous, perhaps?" Etienne's eyes almost twinkled. "Pakiramdam ko kasi ay may pakialam ka sa akin kapag nagseselos ka."

It broke my heart to hear that from him. So, all this time? He really thought that I don't care about him? I shook my head.

"You don't need to use anyone to make me jealous. And I care about you, Etienne." I sincerely said.

"Prove it, then." Etienne shrugged. "Sinabi mo na rin 'yan ah? And look where we are now. . ."

Napaiwas ako ng tingin. Right, I did say that to him before. Hindi ako nakailag sa mga akusasyon n'ya sa akin. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko ipapakita na mahalaga siya sa akin. Hindi ko alam kung paano ako makakabawi sa kan'ya. Hindi ko alam kung paano kami magkakaayos kung palagi na lang kaming nagbabangayan.

And I did something that would have worsened the situation. I did something that would be my own downfall.

"I like you, Etienne."

"As a friend? Bullshi-"

"Gusto kita ligawan." I gulped. Fuck. Nakita ko na natigilan si Etienne.

Shit ka, Lavender! But I don't know how to stop him from being a manipulative asshole to everyone! He can't use people as he please, hindi n'ya p'wedeng kontrolin ang mga tao dahil lang gusto n'ya. At hindi ko rin alam kung paano siya maibabalik sa dati n'yang katauhan.

"Are you fucking with me?" Etienne's face darkened. He slackened his jaw as he look away.

"No. Gusto nga kita kaya liligawan kita!" pamimilit ko.

I'm not sure about my feelings but all I can do now is make sure that Etienne will not ruin people's lives just because he's bored. Halata naman na pinagtitripan lang n'ya si Gio.

It's obvious that Gio likes Paulene. At ginugulo sila ni Etienne dahil sa. . . Akin.

I didn't want to sound narcissistic but Etienne didn't even bother knowing Gio if he wasn't with me.

"Mangliligaw ka? Really?" Etienne snorted. "Prove it then. As if I would believe you. You're head over heels to CL!"

"Hindi ba p'wedeng change of hearts?!"

Umismid si Etienne at muling hindi na ako pinansin. Hindi ko alam kung pumayag siya na ligawan ko na siya pero agad kong sinubukan na suyuin siya.

Lavy:

Hehe kanta ka ba?

Etienne:

wtf

bakit

Lavy:

Kasi Toxic by Britney Spears ka 😘🥰

Etienne:

hala kinilig ako

🥺 ang sarap mo murahin pero sige mamahalin na lang kita.

I blushed and squealed in my pillow. Gago ito ah! Dapat siya ang pinapakilig ko! Pinigilan ko ang aking tili - at bakit ako kinikilig?!

I am serious though. I will court Etienne for now. At gagawin ko ang lahat upang maging maayos na kami. I have to stop him meddling with others' lives. Alam ko ang mga ginagawa n'ya sa ibang tao.

Akala ko madali lang ito. Akala ko kilala ko si Etienne. Not until I learned that he did something for Adren. Not until I learned that he thought I liked Adren in a romantic way.

I decided to meet with Arrisea, Adren's current girlfriend. Hindi ko maipagkakaila na maganda siya at mukha naman siyang matapang.

"How much for you to take him back?"

She choke on her drink.

"Mali ka 'yata ng tanong? Isn't it supposed to be how much for me to stay away from him?"

I deadpanned. "I'm serious, magkano para balikan mo si Adren? Magkano ba binayad sa'yo ni Etienne para layuan mo siya?"

"What? Hindi ako bayaran at hindi binayaran ni Etienne. . ."

Nanglaki ang mga mata ko.

"What do you mean?"

"Don't tell me you followed him like a devoted follower?" I sighed. "Naniwala ka sa kan'ya?"

"Naniwala sa alin?"

"Etienne is zero percent honest. He only says his version of truth." I said, bitterly. Hindi ko inakala na may umabot na sa ganito. Hindi na ito laro-laro lang. Buhay na ng ibang tao ang pinaglalaruan ni Etienne.

"A-ano?"

I decided to drag Arrisea to see Etienne who didn't even look distraught to see us barged into his lair.

"Hello, Lavy." Etienne smiled.

"Anong sinabi mo kay Arrisea?"

"What do you think? The truth."

"To hell with your truths!"

Sinugod ko siya at hinawakan sa kan'yang kwelyo. Etienne only looked at me blankly. His lips gradually formed a wicked smile.

"Aw, Lavy. Ganyan ka ba pinalaki? You're so violent." He mocked. Nanginig naman ako, he knows what happened to me. Alam n'yang lumaki ako sa isang mapangabusong pamilya.

"Anong sinabi mo kay Arrisea? Bakit niya hiniwalayan si Adren?"

I didn't like to drag Arrisea with our issues. No'ng una ay binantaan ko na siya tungkol sa papapasukin n'ya. I wasn't expecting Etienne himself to be involve with them. I was more scared that the Reverios will do something on Arrisea.

Etienne tilted his head to our direction.

For a split second, I saw the gentle Etienne that I used to be with. He softly caressed my cheeks. I stiffened because of his sudden movements. His gentle fingertips touch my skin making me feel that he still cares about me.

"I only gave you what you wanted. You said you wanted his company, didn't he gave up the position by now?"

"T-teka, pwede niyo naman siguro ako isali sa usapan niyo?" Arrisea asked in between of us.

Nilingon ko siya upang sabihin sa kan'ya ang nangyayari ngayon sa aming kompanya. It was a dangerous idea. I didn't want the company, I didn't even care about it!

"Adren wants to give me his shares. Do you know what that means? It means he's basically giving me the company."

"Akala ko? Ang sabi mo, ito ang paraan para hindi siya madawit sa gulo namin ni Tatiana? Para masigurado na sa kanya ang kompanya nila?" Arrisea sounded confuse. Halatang wala siyang alam sa sitwasyon. I sighed because it's only the tip of the iceberg.

"I also told you that truths can be twisted," ani Etienne.

"What did this jerk told you?" nanggagalaiting tanong ko.

"Ang sabi niya ay masisira ang pangalan ni Adren sa kompanya niyo kung patuloy siyang makikipagkita sa akin. Dahil nadawit ang pangalan ko sa maaaring maging butas para sa kanya. It was the only way to make sure he won't face any possible dirt on his name."

"Oh my god! And you honestly believed him?! The Reverios can even freaking covered up a murder! A rumor like that can easily be erased! We can even make sure that Tatiana won't ever exist!"

Etienne knew about Tatiana because of this? Was he planning this all along? Para ano? Gumanti sa akin? Gumanti gamit kay Adren?!

"B-bakit ganito, Etienne?" Arrisea was teary-eyed yet she still kept her faith in Etienne. Hindi ko magawang magalit sa kan'ya. Etienne is someone you can really rely on, however he can also be your worst enemy. He's definitely the gray area of things. The in betweens. The almost.

Etienne looked entertained.

"I was bored. I just helped Lavy get what she's born for."

"Anong sinabi mo kay Adren? I knew you were the one who manipulated him to give up his shares!" asik ko sa kan'ya.

He responded his reason however my anger was slowly consuming every fiber of my being. Hindi ko na natandaan ang naging rason n'ya. No matter what his reason is, it will never be alright! It will never be right!

"Why did you have to mess with my brother?!"

"Brother nga ba? Uh huh, you love him that much? Don't you think it's disgusting to call him your brother when you're head over heels for him?"

I stood there, frozen on my spot. Hindi ko gusto si Adren. I never saw Adren in that way. He's doing this because he thought that I like Adren?

"A-ano?" Arrisea gasped.

"Wala kang alam." I bit my lower lip.

"Ampon." Etienne said, mockingly.

"That's foul!" Arrisea said.

"Damn you!" I stormed out. Ampon?! Totoo nga? Totoo nga ang sinabi sa akin na alam na n'ya. Alam n'yang. . .

My eyes closed forcefully. Pilit kong pinapakalma ang aking sarili. Unti-unti kong naiintindihan na dapat ko nga talagang suyuin si Etienne.

He knows something! He definitely knows! Kung gano'n, baka totoo nga. . . Maybe it's also true he knows where my mother is currently living.

❛ ━━━━━━･❪♀❫ ･━━━━━━ ❜