Madhu's earliest memory dated back to when she was three. She couldn't remember the details, only a hazy image of her mother wearing a blue sari as she stood perched on a ladder with a brush in hand, painting the ceiling of their bedroom, a large blue bindi between her brows.

She could see her bindi. The blue dot coming towards her as her mother bent down to kiss Madhu goodnight, and then burst into flames.

Madhu woke up with a start, a silent cry for her Ma remaining unuttered on her lips.

Realising she was back in her childhood bedroom, Madhu tried to calm her rapid breathing. Chikki, who was sleeping soundly beside her, moved closer to her.

Blinking through the foggy mist of her eyes, Madhu focused on the ceiling. The image was faded but still vibrant. It was a large banyan tree beneath which a sage was sat, narrating fables from the Panchatantra to the jungle animals that surrounded him. The jobless jackal, the wise owl, the royal lion, the cunning snake, the clever monkey, the crocodile couple, the loyal mongoose, the shrewd rabbit, the beautiful donkey, the serene elephant, the graceful eagle, the kind mouse and every other animal imaginable. As a child, she could easily lose herself in that image, with her mind painting the stories her grandfather and Raghu Kaka used to tell her.

She wished she could go back to those tales again and forget everything else.

A knock sounded through the door.

With a flinch, Madhu parted her cracked lips. Sand grated the inside of her parched throat as she called out in a feeble voice, "Come in."

Suman stepped inside, holding a tray with a bowl of food and jug of water in one hand, and an ice bag in another. Placing it on the bedside table, she sat down beside Madhu and smiled sadly.

With her help, Madhu sat up straight, wincing when a sharp pinch clamped down on the mid-point of her spine. She slowly gulped two glasses of water and the relief was instantaneous.

"What happened?" croaked Madhu, leaning back against the headboard.

"Nakul bhai said you fainted due to dehydration, and you've bruised your shoulder and your back but it's nothing serious. He thinks you just need to rest. Also here," she handed her the ice bag. "This will help with your back."

It was only when she said it that Madhu became aware of the light pain in her right upper arm all the way to her collarbone. It was not too intense, kind of like fifty something needles stabbing her muscles, but nothing seemed to be broken. Although her arm did feel too stiff to move.

"And how did I get here?"

Suman hesitated for a moment, but then started speaking. "Well, after I came here, I fell asleep in Nakul bhai's room. He woke me up late in the afternoon after coming back from the district headquarters and asked about you. I told him you must still be in the market. Then he asked whether a woman named Champa had come here to cook, when I said no, he picked up a lathi and rushed to check up on her. You were unconscious when he came back, and he was carrying you. Then he went out again, talking about going to the hospital."

"Did he take my car?"

Suman bit her lip, hesitating. "Yes, and he asked me to apologise for not taking your permission."

"That's okay. I would've wanted him to use it anyway."

Suman opened her mouth, as if to say something, but then decided not to.

She got up to pull down the grills on the open window, remarking that mosquitoes would fill the room otherwise. Lightening an insect-repellent incense coil, she softly murmured that she would leave Madhu to her soup.

"No!" Madhu said quickly, stopping the younger woman in her tracks. "Can you stay?"

It was a desperate plea. After all these years, Madhu thought she should know how to grit her teeth and deal with the absence of people around her. She was, after all, the sole person responsible for getting rid of every meaningful relationship in her life, with the way she treated people. But tonight, she didn't feel like being left alone with only her thoughts to comfort her, primarily because her mind was her worst enemy. 

Suman didn't protest though, she just sat down again with a small smile. It wasn't the first time that Madhulika marvelled at her strength. It hadn't even been two days since she'd given birth to a stillborn and had been thrown out of her own home. Yet here she was, mothering Madhu despite being nine years her junior.

"How are you holding up? And Vinita and Kavita?"

"The girls are sleeping," Suman softly replied. "And I'm doing okay. I talked to Nakul bhai about going to my mother's house for a few days, he said he'd drop me at the bus stop tomorrow, it's just a couple of villages away."

The bruise beneath her eye had turned brown, already healing. Her dark complexion and the prominent sleepless shadows under her eyes camouflaged it so well that if Madhu didn't know it was there, it would've been difficult to spot. Besides, Suman also had her long hair open and untucked, probably to use it as a curtain when she needed. "So you haven't told Nakul?"

She stiffened visibly, chewing the underside of her lip. "It's really not necessary. Raju is just grieving, that is his way of coping. I'll spend a few days away from him and when he'll calm down, he'll pick me up himself."

Suman sounded as if she was speaking from experience and Madhu didn't know what to make of that. Chikki sniffled in his sleep, moving his big doggy head and placing it on her lap. Eventually, Madhu unlocked her jaw from its frozen state. "If you...ever need a job, don't hesitate to come to me. I'm looking for a new in charge for the crèche in Jasm Inn."

"What's that?"

"A place for the children of my staff. You're good with kids, right?"

Her throat bobbed as she swallowed before nodding her assent. "Thank you, I--I'll think about it." She fidgeted with the corners of her sari before standing abruptly. "I think I just heard Vinita crying, I should..." Suman ducked out of the room without finishing her sentence, leaving Madhu alone again.

There wasn't anything left for Madhu to do now. It was strange, the lack of tasks here. Back in Delhi, her schedules were so packed it was impossible to even find time to breathe. Here, all she ever did was breathe and eat and sleep. Time moved slowly in the village and Madhulika had no idea if she liked that or not.

Eventually, sleep lulled her again.

It was a quiet, dull and dreamless affair this time and naturally, was broken all of a sudden with a jolt. Madhu was hyper aware of the footsteps padding across the cold, stone floor of her room. This time when she opened her eyes, it was pitch black, almost midnight, and she frantically reached out to switch on her bedside lamp.

Nakul froze and turned around when the soft yellow light flooded the room, one hand on the handle of the door he was intending to exit from. "Hey, sorry I didn't mean to wake you up," he said awkwardly, voice a bit louder for the hour. "I was just here to check-up on you, and to drop those Disprins in case you felt feverish during the night."

He stepped forward and stopped at the foot of her bed as Madhu dragged herself to a sitting position, removing the bag which was now filled with lukewarm water from beneath her and placing it on the other side of the bed. A shadow falling across his scarred face made Nakul appear rougher than he did during daytime, more impassive. 

"That's okay," she formed her words slowly, carefully. She didn't know if it actually helped him understand her better, but it was a habit she had unconsciously acquired while speaking to him, hoping he won't notice and be offended. "When did you come back? And how's Kamal?"

"Just an hour ago. And Kamal is better. The wounds weren't too deep, and he thankfully didn't have a concussion." His words were curt as he eyed her carefully. "Are you feeling okay?"

She nodded quickly, crossing her stretched legs and leaning forward. "Thank you for showing up when you did today." Madhu internally shuddered at the mere thought of what would've happened otherwise.

His features hardened, liquid brown eyes turning cold. "You don't need to thank me, ever. But we need to talk about what you did there." Madhu wasn't sure if it was intentional on his behalf, but his voice dropped when he said that, became more gravelled. He carefully lowered his large frame on the edge of her bed, more than two feet away from her. "It was far too risky for you to try to fight them alone, not to mention stupid. What would I have told your father if something had happened to you?"

Blood, hot and thick, rushed to her face. Was it possible to feel angry and insulted at the same time? "I'm sorry, I'll just sit by and let people burn innocent animals next time."

"Look," he started, his calm, patronizing voice grating her flared nerves even more. "I'm not saying those bastards don't deserve to be castrated, but you can't always let passion cloud your judgement. You should've called for help."

"Oh, it's all too easy to say that now, you don't know what it's like to be under that kind of a pressure—"

She stopped short, the meaning of her words sinking down on her.

To his credit, Nakul didn't look overtly rattled, but Madhu did notice the side of his burned cheek ticking. "I think I do know a thing or two about pressure."

She opened her mouth to apologise but he cut across her, sounding gentler.

"I know all this angers you Madhu; it always has, even when we were kids. But you can't change the world in one stroke. You've been here barely three days and have already done so much for your people. But you can't always fight on behalf of the weak, that'll just keep them weak forever. Instead, give them the tools to be powerful, like you did with Champa by hiring her."

She pursed her lips and her French-tipped nails bit into the mounds of her palm. "That didn't stop them from beating the shit out of Kamal or from burning Rani."

"It didn't," he agreed. "But at least now she isn't too aversive to the idea of filing a police complaint."

Madhu's eyes widened. "She filed a complaint?"

"She said she would, tomorrow."

Madhu was at a loss of words. When she didn't say anything, Nakul filled the silence instead.

"Why do you think they don't question my caste anymore? Because they know I'll answer each of them and expose their bigotry. Ever since I came back two years ago, they've kept their distance."

"Why did you come back though?" she asked quickly, sitting up straight. "The army must have offered you a desk job or something after you became..."

"Deaf, you can say the word Madhulika, it's not poisonous." He cracked a smile. "They did offer, but I didn't take it. However now is not the time to have that conversation." He stood up. "You need to rest, and frankly, so do I. It's been a long day."

With that, he bade her goodnight and slipped out of the room before she had the chance to reply.

Panchatantra- ancient Indian fables which always come with a moral lesson.

Bindi- that strange yet pretty dot Indian women stick between their brows? The one that comes in various shapes, colours and sizes? Yeah that.