The fluorescent light buzzed softly overhead, casting a bright glow across the garage. Izzy wiped his hands on a rag, satisfied with the car repairs he had just completed. He glanced over at Sean, who had just descended the stairs and slumped onto the sofa with a deep sigh. It was clear that something had been weighing on Sean's mind for the past fortnight.

As the caring older brother, Izzy fetched a beer from the fridge and placed it on the coffee table before joining Sean, leaning casually against a nearby column. He gave Sean a reassuring nod, silently encouraging him to open up whenever he was ready.

"Izzy...," Sean started, his voice somewhat small. "What if... I'm not... entirely straight?"

Izzy rested his hand on Sean's head and leaned closer, peering into his dark, anxious eyes. There was a relaxed smile on his face, offering his little brother comfort. "Are you trying to ask me if anything between us changes because you have a thing for Jay?"

Sean instinctively pushed his hand away. "W-what?! No... It's... Yes..."

He plopped on the sofa beside him and sighed. Izzy could understand where Sean was coming from. Thailand wasn't as tolerant as it's portrayed to be. "I have known you since you were five, Sean. And nothing will change just because you discovered you are into guys... or one specific guy," he added with a cheeky smile, showing him he honestly didn't mind. "You are my little brother, and until you can stand on your own two feet, this is your home."

"Thanks," he muttered without looking at him.

"So, what is going on between you two?"

"To be honest, I don't know," Sean sighed, grabbing a beer from the table. "I'm not sure if I even know what's going on with me, Izzy. It feels right when he is around... seeing him topless is a massive turn-on, but..."

"But?" Izzy questioned when Sean remained silent for a while.

"I don't get him," he replied with another heavy sigh. "He seems into it, but then he constantly tries to push me away. Not to mention, he keeps changing topics if the conversation gets too personal for him. It feels like he is constantly on guard, and as soon as he catches himself that he got too close, he withdraws. I'm not sure what to think about it."

"Maybe he is not into guys?"

"Oh, believe me, he is," Sean chuckled, remembering their last conversation.

Izzy sipped his beer with a thoughtful expression. Sean seemed confused about himself, which was understandable when your sexual orientation turned out to be different than what you always believed. Maybe Jay sensed it and decided to play it safe? "I guess before you try to figure out what he wants, you need to decide what you want."

Sean sighed again. "It's not like I have feelings for him or anything... but I want to know how it feels to...," Sean paused for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts. "I don't know, Izzy... I'm curious, maybe? Ugh... why he needs to be so hot?! It would be much easier if he wasn't so perfect..." he trailed off and hid his face in his hands. "God, I can't believe I'm talking about this with you."

Izzy couldn't help but burst out laughing, but seeing Sean's deadly glare peaking between his fingers stopped him. "Simple question, do you miss him?"

"I guess?"

"Do you enjoy spending time with him?"

"Yes."

"Do you want to get to know him better?"

"Definitely."

"Would you be satisfied with just being friends?"

"I don't think so..."

"Do you want to have sex with Cherry or Jay?"

"Jay," Sean answered without thinking before looking at Izzy, utterly horrified. "You are the worst."

"You will thank me later," he laughed, ruffling his hair and earning another deadly glare. "The truth is you are into him, clearly. I'm not saying there are feelings involved, but you are interested. I would say, go for it and see where it goes."

"What if I'm just confused, and I will mess things up between us?"

"You are definitely confused, Sean. It's perfectly normal to be when you are suddenly confronted with the idea that you are bi. You can always keep it casual while trying to figure yourself out. It may work out or not. You will never know unless you try," Izzy said with a reassuring smile. "But nothing will ever happen if you bury yourself in 'what ifs'."

"It's not that simple..." Sean paused as his phone buzzed with an upcoming message. His eyes widened slightly at the sender's name... a person he hadn't heard from for the last two weeks. Sean's fingers trembled slightly as he unlocked the screen, but then a small smile crept onto his lips.

"Does Sari's auntie still have this bungalow near Haad Rin Beach?"

"Yeah, she turned it into a rental for tourists. Why?"

"Do you think it's free next weekend?" Sean asked, trying to sound casual.

Izzy finally connected the dots, and a sly smile crept onto his lips. "It should be," he replied, texting his wife to give her aunt a green light for their plan. "She doesn't rent it around the party. Too much cleaning and destruction after drunk people."

"Oh," Sean deflated slightly.

"But I'm sure she can make an exception for a family member and not charge you anything if you leave the place spotless and clean."

The look in Sean's eyes was worth all the plotting. It was good to see him interested in something other than studies and revenge. Izzy did worry that their worlds were too far apart and Sean would end up hurt once Jay left, but it felt worth the try. Maybe somehow, these two could make it work?

"It has only one bed," Izzy chirped.

Sean rolled his eyes. "We will figure something out. I'm sure there is a sofa one of us can crash on."

"You are both too tall for the sofa... unfortunately."

"For fuck's sake, Izzy!" Sean huffed, borderline fed up with his insinuations.

"That's what bed would be for..."

Sean smacked him with a large cushion, giving him an indignant look.

"Should I give you talk about safety during sex of another man?" Izzy asked teasingly, reaching to pinch his cheeks.

Sean jumped to his feet with a horrifying look, instantly dashing out of Izzy's reach. "I will fucking kill you if you try that again!"

"Oh? I was sure you loved it when my mum did it."

"I was utterly traumatised! She was relentless, and it was impossible to say no to her!"

Izzy burst out laughing. "Fine, fine. So what about this safety talk?"

"Go and die!" Sean hissed, rushing towards the stairs. "And thanks!"

On the outside, he looked utterly pissed and most likely would strangle Izzy to death, but deep inside, Sean was relieved that the person he considered his older brother was cool about the whole thing. He knew Izzy wasn't intolerant and close-minded like some people, yet he couldn't help but worry. It always feels easy to be open-minded when the topic doesn't involve you directly.

Sean reached for his phone and unlocked the screen, showing the message. He never knew one sentence could make him so excited. Sean sighed, admitting that Izzy was right. He was totally into him.

Jay

I'm coming back later this week if you are still up for the party.

Me

Sure, I got us a decent place to stay.

It's spotless clean.

Jay

That's a shame...

I was looking forward to seeing you in an adorable maid outfit 😏

Me

I guess you will have to use your imagination 😉

Jay

I'm never going to unsee it now...

Me

Oh? Do you need me to bleach your eyes?

Jay

No, but I could definitely use a different mental image...

Me

Oh well, that sounds like a you problem.

Jay

I agree to disagree... given it's you in a frilly apron haunting me...

Me

Do me a favour and drop the apron, would you?

Jay

Are you sure about this? 😏

Me

😑

Sean shook his head at the screen, a wry grin tugging at his lips. It had been over two weeks since they last spoke, but the banter between them picked up effortlessly like they hadn't missed a beat. As if it was the most natural thing to engage in borderline flirtation with him.

During those quiet weeks, Sean had done some serious soul-searching. He had always considered himself as straight as they come, but Jay had thrown a bit of a spanner in the works. It was confusing, to say the least. Technically, he understood how attraction works, but it didn't make it any easier to fully accept it. It's not like he simply woke up and decided he was gay or bi from now on. It required a massive overhaul of everything he knew about an essential part of himself. But Sean was slowly growing to accept it.

Still, accepting it and knowing what to do with it were two entirely different things. Sean wasn't about to start waving rainbow flags or anything. He wasn't even sure if Jay was into him. And even if he did, what then? They lived miles apart, for one thing. And there were a million other complications to consider. But maybe Izzy was right. It's not like he had to commit to anything. Keeping it casual and simply exploring this thing between them could be fun.

Sean smiled. Yes, going with the flow sounded like a good idea.

As the taxi wound its way through the streets in the early morning, the city slowly stirred from its slumber. Towering skyscrapers loomed overhead, their glass facades reflecting the first light of dawn. The Chao Phraya River glimmered in the distance, its tranquil waters contrasting with the bustling cityscape.

His eyes rested on the east side, drawn there like a magnet.

At first, he was dead set on staying away from Sean, but later, he found himself pondering Victor's words more often than he cared to admit. It wasn't that he had suddenly turned into a hopeless romantic overnight – far from it. He wasn't exactly known for sticking around. It was easier to go through life with no strings attached and no complications relationships would inevitably bring. There was a certain comfort to being alone, letting everything pass him by. But there was also something about Sean that made him want to stick around a little longer... to maybe give it a try.

Just keep it casual, and don't let him get invested, and it will be fine...

The late morning air was warm and alive with the hum of activity. Sunlight filtered through the foliage near the university gate, casting dappled shadows on the pathways where students strolled leisurely between classes, their laughter and chatter blending seamlessly with the rustle of leaves overhead.

Sean was leaning on the tree not far from the gate, leisurely observing passing students. He was supposed to meet Win here, but the latter was apparently running late. Sean sighed and looked down at his phone. He was scrolling through the news when a shadow loomed over the screen. Sean looked up, and a flicker of disappointment passed through his eyes. Yeah, he was definitely not into this anymore.

"I'm exhausted," Cherry sighed, leaning closer. "I have the impression exam periods are designed to finish us off on every possible level."

Sean gave her a polite smile. "Tell me about it."

"And this is just the beginning..."

Her voice suddenly faded away as his undivided attention was drawn to one singular point. His heart quickened imperceptibly, captivated by his confident stride, the innate elegance and the way his features seemed to effortlessly command attention. His shirt was causally unbuttoned on the top, showing a glimpse of collar bone... Sean's memory provided him with the rest of the picture.

"So, do you want to meet later?"

"Ah, sorry," he replied noncommittally, already half-step towards Jay. "I don't think I will be up for it anymore."

"Oh! Sure," Cherry replied, unbothered by his reaction as their agreement was clear and transparent. "Thanks, it was fun."

"Yeah, see you," Sean responded with a slight wave as he walked towards the path.

Did Sean feel bad about not waiting for Win? Definitely not, as he completely forgot about him. And it's not like Win intended to meet Sean... he just wanted him in the right spot at the right time.

Even from a distance, it was visible how exhausted Jay was. Sean was surprised to see him this morning, just a few hours after his flight landed.

"You look like shit," Sean commented lightly, catching up with him.

Jay gave him an amused side glance. "It's great to see you, too."

"Shouldn't you be in bed?"

His eyebrow quirked teasingly. "Oh? Is it an invitation?"

"It could be, but I don't think mine is up to standard," Sean quipped back at him. "Unfortunately, it lacks Egyptian cotton."

"The audacity," Jay chuckled, mockingly placing a hand over his heart.

Sean chuckled but then gave him a worried look. "Seriously, what are you doing here? Isn't it like the middle of the night for you?"

"Win insisted I sit through some quiz or maybe exam," Jay replied, muffling a yawn. "I have no idea what it is about, but it's easy to copy the answers, and Tay needs extra credit for whatever class it is."

"I would get you a coffee, but that would probably be more offensive than the lack of Egyptian cotton," he said, supportingly patting Jay's shoulder.

Jay laughed lightly and reached for his phone, then instantly frowned. However, Sean was sure someone was going to die soon, and he had a good idea of who. His suspicion was confirmed when Jay showed him a message from Win, apologising that he got the timing wrong and that it was over an hour until the exam started.

"I still know a good spot where we can hide the body," Sean said with a sympathetic smile. "Why don't you stay here," he pointed at their usual spot underneath a large tree. "And I will get you your tea?"

"It's fine," he replied with resignation. "You can go to your classes."

"I don't have classes till later today, I was supposed to meet..." Sean trailed off as it finally sunk.

It wasn't the first time Win asked him to do something, and then conveniently, Jay would be there while Win had some poor excuse for his absence. Normally, he wouldn't mind, but Jay was barely standing and clearly needed to catch more sleep, not get dragged into Win's plotting.

"I'm going to fucking kill him," he muttered, grabbing Jay's wrist and pulling him towards the tree. "I will be back in a few minutes."

When Sean returned, balancing two cups and a bag with fresh croissants, he discovered Jay nestled on the grass, legs crossed, leaning against the tree with closed eyes. In that tranquil moment, Jay appeared unusually serene and endearing, a sight Sean rarely witnessed when he was awake. Sean smiled and settled quietly beside him, opting not to disturb his sleep. He could get him another tea later.

As Sean delved into his textbook, he was interrupted by the gentle tickle of hair brushing against his neck, accompanied by the comforting scent of cedarwood and cypress as Jay's head dropped to his shoulder. Sean would never admit it, but his heart literally skipped a beat. He shifted slightly, straightening his back to make Jay more comfortable, then tried to focus on his reading. Unfortunately, it took all his brain power to resist the temptation to run his fingers through Jay's dark brown hair.

As a result, Sean spent the next hour pretending he was studying.

"Jay? Hey, wake up," he called, gently patting his cheek. "The exam starts soon."

"Give me five more minutes," Jay mumbled in his sleep, changing his position from merely resting his head on Sean's shoulder to a more intimate one. His face was now nestled in the curve of Sean's neck.

Sean froze, feeling Jay's soft breath gently fanning over his sensitive skin, sending a shiver down his spine. 'He's asleep... don't read anything into it... just don't,' he thought, swallowing hard. Feeling the tension rising, Sean knew he had to do something before his restraint snapped and he would kiss him.

With a questionable stroke of genius, he flipped his fabric shoulder bag to create a makeshift pillow, then carefully manoeuvred Jay's body down to rest in his lap. However, as he settled Jay into this new position, a wave of realisation washed over him – it wasn't the best idea, and it was already too late to turn back. Now, it would take a miracle for him not to run his fingers through Jay's hair.

Sean took a slow, deep breath. 'Pure thoughts, pure thoughts, pure thoughts... He just needs a bit more sleep... there is nothing to it... nothing, just favour between friends... It must be really soft, though...' At this moment, Sean slapped himself in the face.

It wasn't until fifteen minutes later and after several frantic messages from Win that Sean attempted to wake him up again.

Jay blinked slowly, then lifted his head from Sean's lap and sat up, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand. He glanced around, seemingly unfazed by the change in position, as he stretched his arms above his head.

"Thanks for the pillow," Jay murmured, flashing Sean a lazy smile. "What time is it?"

"Don't mind," he replied, his voice softer than intended. "Win is in a panic mode, but we can let him suffer a bit longer and get you a fresh tea," he added, passing him a bag with croissants.

"Perfect," Jay grinned, much more awake now.

Ignoring the chain of Win's frantic messages and the apparent strain on his sanity, Sean and Jay took their time enjoying coffee and green tea as they finalised their plans for the Full Moon Party. Just in two days, the course of their lives would drastically change, and neither of them could prevent it.