Zara.

I sat opposite Mona, listening as she talked about lanre,her boyfriend. Her legs were crossed and her hands held a spoon as she poured cornflakes into the bowl between her legs. The soft matress she sat on sank in as Jacqueline sat beside her.

"I never liked that Lanre." Jacqueline said. I almost nodded in return, but i refrained.

I had liked Lanre for her initially. I had even encouraged her to date him. It would be absolutely wrong if i started antagonizing him.

"I know i said the guy is good oh. That was before, the Guy is a total asshole at this point." Grace blurted from beside me.

Ene walked into the corner, slipping her slippers off at the entrance.

"Maybe Lanre is not only problem." Ene chimed as she sat beside Grace.

Grace turned to her. "How?"

Ene shrugged. "He said Mona rarely talks to him, it's as if she doesn't even want to see him at times."

Mona snorted. "He is just reversing the whole thing. He is the one who keeps acting like that."

"You guys should just talk it out." I suggested.

Ene nodded. "Exactly, instead of all the talking to other people."

Mona looked into her bowl of cornflakes and shrugged. As if remembering something, she looked up. "Biko, Zara, what's with you and Nzerome."

I smiled, amused. "Nzerome?"

Grace laughed. "You know na, Zero and Jerome together. Nzerome,"

I burst into laughter. "Mona ehn."

"Why is the guy always attacking you?" Jacqueline inquired.

I clapped my hands together. "I don't know for the idiot oh."

Ene smirked. "You better know oh. He is Toby's best friend."

Jacq rolled her eyes. "And so?"

"Abi oh. Help me ask her," i smirked.

Ene glared at me, i feared her eyes may fall out of it's socket.

"So who saw when Samuel snubbed Bola." Mona said, lowering her voice.

Jacq tapped Mona lightly, failing miserably to control her laughter. I felt the laughter rising.

"Bola oh. She wanted to talk to him, she now firstly use her nyash to hit him. The Guy now said-" Mona laughed. "He now said. 'Who be this Amoeba wey dey rub garri for my hand!"

Jacq and Mona clutched their sides as they laughed. Ene, Grace and I just stared at them. I had absolutely no laughter to let out.

"Then Bola now asked if he wants to talk by the corner. The guy now said 'you look like marmi water. Shift lemme pass'." Jacq completed.

Only Mona andJacq kept laughing.

I shook my head. "Guys, it's not funny."

Grace agreed. "Yes, For Zara at least not to laugh, it should tell you how dry your gist is."

Mona glared at us. "It was funny in real life."

                          _________

I sat on my sit, listening as Mr John explained the themes in the Amma Darko's  Faceless. His trousers hung tightly around his belly and he kept on pulling it further. Most of us couldn't hold our laughter as he did it. He read a line from the book and pulled the trousers up again.

"Is that orkay?" The man didn't say ohk, he said orkay.

Samson snickered.

The class went on. Once the period was over, he pulled his trousers up before he exited the class. Another round of laughter ensued.

Our laughters died abruptly once Mr Makinde a.k.a Bottom belle walked in with a pankere in hand. His huge butt and his round protruding belly moved in unison as he walked to the center. That was why we called him bottom belle. His stomach was huge and so was his butt. It was so difficult to resist the urge to laugh anytime he walked.

"Idiot.... fool... moh...moh...mohmoh... ge...get... get out!" He shouted once he caught Samson laughing.

Another of his trait; he stammers, he shouted too much, he was left handed and his cane was incredibly painful. We all winced as Samson swaggered towards him. The man sprang towards Samson, with his cane in hand. Samson screamed as he turned the other way, narrowly escaping the man's cane. The man growled as he moved towards Samson. Samson ducked this time, moving right. Mr Makinde flung the cane away in frustration, his butt, his breast and his stomach bounced as he did so. We all burst into laughter.

"Everybody, to the princ... prin...prin..." he closed his eyes and inhaled sharply, before letting out the last word with a huff. "Principal's office."

         
                      ________

My entire class member knelt down outside, under the sun for the rest of the day. We had been ordered by a bored principal and an angry teacher to do so. Once we were released, i headed straight towards Jacqueline's class to pick her up as she had insisted.

On getting there, I collided with something firm. I winced as my forehead hit the person's collars bone. I staggered back. A hand gripped my forearm and held me in place. I looked up.

"Watch where you are  going next time." Jerome groaned. The skin on his forehead folded slightly. His fair nose was red, as though he had been rubbing it continueously. His dark brown orbs bore into mine. For most girls, him gripping them must be exciting and looking into their eyes ; they'll probably jump fence. But for me, he was so annoying and infuriating and he often irked me. We had never been friends, not even in junior class, never. His broad shoulders lifted slightly as he breathed out.

I huffed, trying to jerk my hands from his. Boy was he strong. Not the strongest for my set, but he was strong.

He glared at me, before he finally let go. His hands swiped on his full afro as he stepped back.

Show off.

I wonder how he snuck past teachers with his full hair.

"You're so dumb." He muttered as he shoved past me.

I clenched my fist angrily and turned around to tell him a piece of my mind. Only to see him already laughing, and flirting with his latest ex girlfriend, Rose. I turned away from him angrily and walked into SS3D to call Jacq.

There were four arms in SS3, which was A,B,C and D. A was for art students, B and D For science while C for commercial. Ene, Grace and I were in A, Mona was in B. Toby was in C, while Jacqueline and the idiot Jerome were in D class.

A hand gripped my shoulder, I turned to see Ene standing there with Grace. They raised a brow at me.

"Why did you run off like that?" Ene inquired.

"I wanted to get Jacq." I shrugged.

"You should have told us." Grace stated.

A loud squeal interrupted us. We all turned around. And as expected, Jacq stood there, smiling gleefully as she squealed some more.

"Why are you screaming?" Grace asked dryly. Her hands settled on her hip, emphasizing on the curves. Her hour glass figure was so so hour glassy.

"I'm so glad you guys came for me!" Jacq smiled.

I rolled my eyes. "Abeg. Let's go joor. I'm hungry sef."

"Eat me." Ene retorted.

I smacked her arm as we all chuckled.

As the four of us walked down the corridor, Mona joined us by the way. Her dark skin glowed as we stepped into the sun.

"Mona, did you apply something oily?" Grace asked.

Mona nodded.

"No wonder your skin is glowing." I noted.

We kept on walking. Suddenly, we heard loud laughter behind us, followed by whispered words.

"No.. Zara is assless,"

Voices erupted into laughter.

"Ene has small ass sha.."

"Ene's own is pointed."

"Zara's own is wide, not too flat sha."

"Yes but compared to Grace's own na."

Laughter erupted again. The five of us exchanged glances. Some set of boys were behind us, measuring our butt.

"Let's step aside let them pass," Grace spoke up.

"Jacqueline does not have ass to sha, but her shape is on the beat!" I quickly recognized this voice as Henry's. One of the very popular boys. Tall, dark and incredibly handsome will do well to describe him.

I instantly knew that the group of boys behind us where the abnormal ones, who had no respect for girls. It was only a matter of time before they mentioned Mona.

Grace suddenly stepped aside, so did Ene and I, then the rest stepped aside too. We all watched as the boys looked our way and laughed.

Grace snorted.

Mona smirked. "As if their stuff is even big."

I jabbed Mona, not before I burst into a loud uncontrollable laughter. A laughter that sent heads turning my way. It took thirty minutes for my laughter to subside.