Dear Diary

Every day, if possible, I fall more and more in love with Tristan Mathews. What an amazing man I found. I owe it all to you GiGi. Giving me and Zee the house allowed Tristan to come into my life. Zee says I would have stumbled upon Tristan at some point because they were pretty close. Perhaps. I still say it was you and this old house.

This old house I still love, so thank you. Tristan has grown to love it as well. And the amount of work he has put into it over the years...just wow. The basement is unrecognizable. Not only is it his man cave/fitness center and office now, but we made it a place where the kids enjoy going down there to play.

We finally installed a new water heater, although that did not stop Tristan and me from taking showers together.

Tristan expanded the laundry room, although I still have fond memories of us in that confined space. I still blush at our first kiss there ten years later

Tristan has also redone all three bathrooms, installed new tubs and toilets, new floors, and painted the walls. Once Zee moved out a few months after she found out about us to stay with a girlfriend, we took the master room over. I finally cleared out the smaller room and we made that into a guest bedroom for whenever Zee wanted to come back.

Which she has over the years. This is still her house. I love having her home with us, but she never seems to stay in one place at all. She's like Dad in that way, although she refuses to see it. I understand now why you always welcomed him back when he was in between girlfriends and get-rich schemes.

Zee tried therapy and I was so proud of her. Only after six months and a few sessions, she stopped going. Her depression was better, or at least she found ways to deal with it. We started to talk more and all she seemed to want was for someone to love her. I can understand that.

Tristan Junior loves his Aunt Zee so much. They are like best friends. I can't believe he is five years old now. Time flies. I wanted to wait a little longer after starting my teaching job, but Tristan had the baby itch. Junior is perfect in every way. But it was I who wanted a little girl and could not wait to try again. A year and a half later we welcomed Tamyra Millie Mathews.

My father never even met his grandchildren. I tried one last time to mend the relationship by inviting him to my college graduation. Already divorced from the woman he hastily married, he never showed up and never explained. So of course he was not invited to our wedding six months later.

It's okay, my kids are loved by their other grandparents. My mother, their Gran, spoils them rotten, over the house nearly every day to help with them. Momma Mathews, or MeMaw as they called her, comes by once a week as well, and she's not as strict with Junior as Tristan claimed his life with her was.

Tristan is such a hard worker. Besides keeping up with the house, being the best father ever, and the best husband ever, he finished school and started his own business. It started with just him, continuing fixing things for friends, and then he started fixing people's houses around the neighborhood. Up and down St. Ferdinand, Tristan was the guy to do any small or large project. He had to hire an assistant, and then more workers. He found an office space not far from the house in The Ville. Business was thriving and he made lots of money, supporting our family.

There was not a night he was not home with me since that day. The neighborhood is doing a lot better as far as safety. After all these years, no one messes with the big red house Millie lived in. I could safely walk my kids down to Tandy Park to play, to the church behind the house, or volunteer at Annie Malone's Children's Home. This is our home, my neighborhood now.

As for me, still trying to be like you GiGi. I work in the garden every summer, with Tristan beside me. I write in my diary as often as I can, and maybe one day my grandchildren can read all about my love for their grandfather. How when he came into my life he changed my world. He has shown me love, and how to love. He is my best friend, my husband, my confidant, my lover, my everything.

And oh yeah, we will be welcoming baby number three...I haven't told Tristan yet.

Johanna Mathews