I pulled up to Jake's house, thanking Google Maps for getting me through it. In this fictional city, with fictional streets and fictional people, I was a fish out of water. It had been after I pulled onto the curb and swore enough to make my grandparents roll in their graves, I realised that I could phone a friend to bail me out of this predicament. 

Since it was confirmed that I was now indeed Xander Hart, the name 'Jake' could finally be matched to a person. Jake was Xander Hart's supposed best friend, the only one ever described in the book because the author couldn't be bothered describing more than one of Xander's friends. Jake was essentially Xander 2.0, but as always, slightly less hot, slightly less popular, but equally as problematic. 

Glancing at the clock and realising that we would be late for school, I quickly honked my horn, this Jake character walking out with no sense of urgency. The honey-blonde boy lightly jogged across his plush lawn, shooting me a thin-lipped grin. My foot tapped on my car's carpeting impatiently, not liking to be late.

"Sup, dude," Jake said, slinging his bag into the backseat and turning to me. Blue eyes rose as my supposed best friend took in my antsy demeanour when I quickly asked him where to go, my 'friend' looking at me like I had grown two heads. 

"I... had a fever and... things are fuzzy," I tried to explain dumbly, but it turned out that Jake was even dumber, and just nodded like that was a completely valid excuse for having severe memory loss. Jake quickly gave me directions, and I hastily sped off.

"Jeez, what's the hurry?"

"We're gonna be late," I replied simply, still wincing at the foreign voice that peeled itself from my changed vocal cords. Jake raised an eyebrow.

"And you care... why? It's not like you turn up to school half the time," Jake said, and I groaned internally. Of course 'Xander' wouldn't care about attendance, of course he would have no regard for his education or his future. Of course, as a fictional character, he could succeed in life by just being a hot badboy. He could get the girl and  become rich because it's totally believable that every hot 18-year-old can suddenly get out of highschool and become a high-powered CEO a la Christian Grey.

But, I was not Xander, and just rolled my eyes at Jake's words in response to his question.

"I need to go to school to graduate," I replied simply, Jake snorting.

"Like I said, you never cared before," Jake snickered, and I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Well, I care now, okay?" I replied flatly, my voice coming out sharper than intended, Xander's natural demeanour making my words that would have usually sounded softly exasperated harsh and biting instead. Jake's eye twitched at my tone, but the boy just rolled his eyes and crossed his arms in front of his chest, lazily telling me to turn left at the next intersection.

It didn't take long to get to school from there, and when we arrived I quickly ditched Jake, who had been giving me slightly frustrated looks the entire car trip. He was likely picking up on my odd persona, and I didn't blame the guy. To not give anything away or get locked up in a mental institution, I tried to be a little like Xander, which was slightly achievable considering he didn't really have much of a personality to emulate. But, I couldn't be that asshole, not even if I tried.

Making a beeline towards student services, I ignored the way students in the halls parted in front of me like the Red Sea, glancing at me with a mixture of weariness and interest. The staff, on the other hand, watched me with narrowed eyes, especially the woman working at the front desk.

Her soft cardigan hid a well-fed body, greying hair tied up into a chignon that was still in pristine condition since a day of dealing with hormonal and angsty teenagers had not yet begun. When she saw me, I could feel the sigh fall from her mouth before she spoke.

"Mr Hart, what gives me the pleasure on this fine morning?" the woman asked sarcastically, and, unlike her, I managed to keep my sigh internal. God, Xander - do you have to make the staff and teachers hate you? Don't you know that school is only harder when the people grading you are out to get you?

"Good morning..." I said slowly, clearing my throat and shooting the woman a small smile. The woman's mouth dropped open, glasses sliding down the rim of her nose as she almost did a double take. Her thoughts were evident all over her shocked face as she looked at me like I was possessed.

Well, I guess Xander was sort of possessed, by a teenager who knew how to be polite to other human beings and behave like a perfectly functional member of society.

When the woman - Deirdre Parkson, her nameplate read - didn't answer, I cleared my throat again.

"Ms Parkson, I, um, I think I lost my class schedule. I was wondering if I could... get another copy printed?" I asked, the woman's glasses sliding further down as her mouth continued its descent into unmitigated shock.

"You... What is... Yes, of course," the woman floundered, slowly backing away on her chair and staring at me like she was seeing a ghost and printing my class schedule before thrusting it into my waiting hands. 

"Thank you," I said, the woman letting out a choked noise, now sure that Xander was possessed. 

"Just... Don't lose it again," she managed to mutter, still staring at me like there was something wrong. What was wrong was that it was so shocking for me to act like a normal person that I rendered the woman nearly catatonic. Lord help me. 

"Yes, of course," I said, the woman coughing. 

"And... And don't forget that you have detention after school," she said, and it was my turn to drop my mouth. 

"What? Detention? What did Xand- I do?" I asked hurriedly, unable to stop the words that were definitely more out of character than these lips uttering a simple 'thank you'. The woman almost looked relieved, staring at me like 'Oh, thank God, this asshat is back to normal', jutting her arms on her hips and levelling me with a hard look.

"Don't pretend you don't remember what you did last Friday, Mr Hart," the woman said, and I cried internally.

'Of course I don't remember! I fucking woke up as Xander Hart this morning!'

"Care to refresh my memory?" I asked pathetically, the woman scoffing. 

"I should not have to remind you that performing... intercourse in the biology lab, or on campus in general, is completely unacceptable behaviour, Mr Hart! I would have thought Mrs Lake would have made that very clear when she caught you on Friday!"

Oh. 

Xander, you fucking-

Who the fuck does that?!

"Right! Yes! I-intercourse! Won't happen again!" I said quickly, feeling my cheeks heat before I muttered another thank you, racing from the office. 

In my panic, I bumped into a tall figure - not quite as tall as the current me, but tall by any other standard, since one can never compare the main male lead to any other human being. The other person was solid in form as well, and didn't topple over even at the speed I was walking, merely taking a sharp inhaled breath with surprise.

"Oh, man, sorry, my bad," I mumbled, darting around the person and clutching my class schedule tightly, because I had enough on my mind to worry about.

When I rounded a corner and got myself away from prying eyes, I quickly skimmed my timetable, and breathed in deeply.

Right. First thing's first - survive my first day of school as Xander Hart. 

***

Surprisingly, class was fine - well, as fine as it could be. Apparently the fact that I turned up on time was a miracle in itself, and the fact that I actually did the experiment made my chemistry teacher have a conniption, because when did Xander Hart pay attention in class? And when did Xander Hart actually understand how to perform a titration?

Well, it's because I, Alexander Smith, current resident of the male lead's body, has already finished highschool once, and exams were recent enough that I could still recall most of the content. It was a weight off my shoulders - I didn't have to worry about school work or study as much, and could focus on just surviving as a new person, one whose previous lifestyle made everything much more complicated. 

I didn't particularly like complicated. My life as Alex Smith was as uncomplicated as they came, any drama and excitement simply living in the world of online novels. I was more than happy to read about people getting into fights, about people having wild sex that would probably end up with someone in an ambulance by the end of it on pages of written prose, of people having showdowns in the middle of cafeterias because someone was looking at their girl the wrong way.

I didn't want to live that life, though. Not one bit.

So, when some girls sauntered up to me in class, swirling their hair with their pens and looking me up and down like they wanted to devour what was beneath it, I very politely spilled some non-toxic chemicals onto their skirts while apologising profusely, my teacher sending them to the bathroom to clean themselves up while raging at me for being careless.

"I shouldn't have expected anything better from you, Mr Hart," the teacher said, sniffing his nose. 

"Mm, sorry, I'll try not to do it again," I said, the teacher's anger fizzling out into shock and nothing else. 

Most of the day plodded along in the same manner, but it was tiring; apparently drama and problems seemed to follow Xander around. He made this bed, and now I was the one that was forced to lie in it. I had never hated Xander Hart's character more, and like Hell was I going to live in this cesspool of a life he had made.

I was going to clean up this mess of a life, or die trying. I already died once, and there was no way I was going to waste my second life living like Xander Hart.

***

When I walked into detention, a chorus of giggles erupted from the corner of the room as flirtatious eyes tracked my every movement. Oh God, Xander definitely slept with one of them. Maybe all of them. Fuck. Which one was the one he slept with on Friday in the biology classroom?

It couldn't have been all of them... at the same time... right?

Surely not...

Oh, no, it definitely could have been, considering chapter 76 of 'Say No to Bad Boys' involved Xander assuring Aubrey that his days of threesomes and orgies were over.

You know what? Just let me die a second time, please.

I could feel myself shiver unpleasantly as their eyes continued to watch me with startling intensity. I ignored them as much as I could and slid myself into a seat at the front of the classroom by the window, looking out onto the grassy field outside. 

The soccer team was beginning their after school practice, blotches of the school's grey and maroon sports uniforms dotting the lawn. 

'Huh, the unfortunate second lead must be out there too,' I thought to myself, corner of my mouth quirking upwards.

Indeed, Elias Fourie, the loser in the love triangle alongside Xander and Aubrey, was the captain of the soccer team, and he stood out from the crowd as any second-tier main character would.

How did the author describe him again...

Aubrey gasped as her books spilled onto the floor, immediately dropping to her knees to gather them to her supple body. She was surprised when a second pair of hands appeared in her vision to help her pick up her books, long sturdy fingers and caramel wrists offering the stack of books to her.

"Here you go," a smooth, soft voice said from above, Aubrey tilting her face to look at the owner of the hands. 

Soft light brown eyes that shone bronze in the light were furthermore lightened with a slight downslope in their corners, his left eye pointing towards a charming mole just beneath it. The boy's lips were full and light pink, and curled up in what seemed like a perpetual smile, immediately soothing. His nose was straight and smooth, and slightly curly dark brown hair was pushed back from his face as he raised a sturdy arm to tame it. When he smiled, one side lifted more than the other, adding to his charm.

'Wow, so handsome,' Aubrey said, momentarily awed, before shaking her head and remembering that she was with Xander now. The thought made her heart quicken, and yet, she could not help but think that this boy in front of her was stunning in his own way. A different kind of way.

I hummed to myself as the person who was obviously Elias jogged across the field, strong legs evident beneath his soccer shorts. 

"Definitely second lead material," I chuckled to myself, rolling my green  eyes slightly. "Why Aubrey chose this asshole over that blows my mind. That girl is delusional as all fuck."

At that, the door to the classroom opened again, and the girls that were staring at me began snickering to themselves.

Uh oh. That reaction definitely meant that the main character had appeared. 

Turning my head, I watched as a small, timid girl walked in. Straight ginger hair fell in wisps around pale freckled cheeks, which were shadowed by glasses which failed to hide pale blue eyes. The girl was pretty, it was obvious to me, and yet the girls behind me openly mocked her for being a 'nerd'.

Yeah, she was smart, but have you seen her? Just because she wears glasses doesn't mean she suddenly looks like a troll! Look at that unrealistically clear skin! Those rare blue eyes! Those pink glossy lips! That red hair that looks silky even as it was tied in a braid! 

The protagonist could never be ugly, even if she was called it by every unnecessary side character. 

'Yep, definitely a total babe. The protagonist really didn't need that 'makeover' in chapter 43, she's already ridiculously pretty,' I thought, watching as the girl tiptoed her way into the classroom, biting her lip nervously as she looked for a seat. There were a few left, but only close to the snickering girls, or directly by my side.

Fuck. This is exactly what happened in 'Say No to Bad Boys'. 

Was this not... a very cliche situation?

I did not want to get wrapped up in Aubrey-the-Protagonist's life, because with what the plot of'Say No to Bad Boys' taught me, it's that she could be a hot fucking mess with zero life skills and very poor decision making abilities. 

But that was not how the plot worked, and Aubrey began to slowly make her way towards me, avoiding the girls that were definitely whispering something about how she had definitely raided her grandmother's wardrobe to put together her outfit today.

Aubrey gave me a tentative look with those blue eyes and I shrunk in my seat, mentally pleading for the protagonist to leave me alone.

And, as per the fictional laws of old, she did not. 

A/N: Aaaaand our protagonist and the original protagonist have made contact! *cackles in cliche*. Things can begin to move along now...

Thank you for reading, and a big, big thank you to everyone who took the time to leave such lovely comments on the previous chapters! You guys are honestly the sweetest :) Stay tuned for the next chapter x