Jungkook blinked and pinched his left hand, hidden underneath the table for the umpteenth time - just to confirm that he's not dreaming this! She's really here - he's not imagining it! She looks so beautiful - with her short, black hair pinned on one side - he can't help but stare. Her lashes still curl up the same behind those big eyes that seemed to be holding a galaxy of its own, and her pink lips are still as tempting as before. 

After the long, tearful embrace on the floor, she led him up to sit at the table where his diluted iced coffee was. She hadn't said a word - only hushed whispers, pleading him to stop crying. His emotional outburst had calmed, now replaced with anxiety over what to say next. The guy from earlier came and placed her drink with a smile.

"Ahh...good thing you didn't have to wait long! I told him you left, noona," The guy mentioned excitedly and obliviously. 

Lisa smiled and nodded - thanking the guy - and it's the first that he heard her small voice. She then turned to face him, and it looks like she's trying to brave herself to do it.

"You found me," She tilts her head - the smile never leaving her face.

"I -" He's nervous and it's obvious. It felt like something is stuck in his throat and he couldn't find the right way to talk. "I...um..." What should he say first? There are so many things he wanted to say but now he just can't seem to find it. Didn't he practiced this in his head so many times?? "Um..."

"Kooki-ah," She leaned forward. "How have you been?"

I'm been feeling like shit - that's how I've been! He looks down to his knotted fingers, still unable to process his words right.

"I spoke to eomma this morning. I told her I'll be visiting tomorrow," She continues, probably accepting the fact that Jungkook had forgotten what words are! "She sounded so worried...I'm so sorry, Kooki-ah,"

What is she sorry for?? He's the one who should feel sorry - he's the one who's supposed to beg for her forgiveness!

"I told her, I wanted to come earlier but something came up. She asked me to come early tomorrow - she said she'll make gamjatang!" She giggled.

How is she doing that? How could she giggle like that in a time like this? They haven't seen each other for 5 months but here she is - talking casually, telling him about his mom as if it's just another day's conversation!

"How - um...how are you getting to Busan? I can -"

"Someone will drive me there," She cuts him off.

'Someone', she said...her new man is referred to as 'someone'. Jungkook felt a sharp stab in his chest.

"Do you um...are you happy with him?" Even as he genuinely asked, he felt the sob in his heart.

"With who?"

"That man...'someone'. He's the one who picked you up from the painting shop right?" Really Jungkook, do you really want to know this??

"Oh," She giggled again. "My cousin - yes, I'm very happy that he's here. Otherwise, I'd be left with nowhere to go when you broke up with me,"

Cousin - 

"I'm sorry!" He leaned forward - probably more aggressively than he should seeing how Lisa had jumped a little in her seat! "I'm so sorry - you have no idea - I was stupid and selfish and I...I was blinded for a while and I know that I don't deserve a second chance! I know that! You deserve so much more - so much better and I ruined us, I ruined what we had and I'm so, so sorry!! There's not a day that I don't regret what I did - you have to know that! You're my everything and I took it for granted. All these while - you're everywhere, in everything that I'm seeing - I can't -" 

His hands are now unconsciously rubbing his face, wiping the tears that has fallen uncontrollably. "I know..." He sighed. "I know I don't deserve you - not after what I've done. But I hope - I really hope you can forgive me...please forgive me...it's okay if you don't want me back. I've learned my lessons and I want you to be happy, I really do! Even if it's not with me, I can learn to be happy for you. Cus you made me the happiest - for years, you made me the happiest, Lily. My life is empty without you in it and I'm thankful - I really am -"

He wasn't quite sure who he's trying to convince - Lisa or himself - but he's desperate to let it out and he couldn't stop all the overflowing thoughts in his mind. Her unwavering gaze is soft, making him feel shy all of a sudden. He looks back down to his lap...preparing himself for the worst.

"Have you met with Jimin and Taehyung?" She suddenly asked. He nods. Taehyung's painful confession came into mind.

"Tae said he kissed you," Is he sulking? Maybe. She's probably laughing at him now...thinking he deserves it.

"Aish...I've been trying to forget that," He's still looking down but he could sense her smile from the tone. "He was just in the moment, don't be mad at him,"

"I'm not...he likes you - I know that. I knew that since that night we fought,"

"Why didn't you say anything?"

He shrugged, as if he wasn't bothered by it - which is clearly a lie! "It was just an assumption...something I thought. I knew somehow that I was kinda selfish and paranoid and I didn't wanna make things worse between us. You already gave me three days of silent-treatment remember?"

"Yeah...cus you slapped me," She laughed. 

"I didn't - I told you it was an accident!" He was quick to defend. "I would never! I mean...I know I'm an asshole for what I did - but I'd never hurt you physically like that -"

"No...you wouldn't, I know...just emotionally huh?" The sarcasm's not lost on him and he sighed - resigned at the accusation that is partly true.

"I wouldn't have done both intentionally...I'm really sorry,"

Silence fills the air around them. Jungkook took the time to reflect on his lucky stars. He found her. She's here. Whether she forgives him or not...or if she accepts him or not...she's here with him. He knew that he can't be picky over things - it's not his place. The ball is in her court, and he's just going to accept whatever she throws at him.

"How about you? Have you been well?" He braves himself to be the first to break the silence, but his eyes are still looking down.

"Yes...yes, I have,"

"Why were you at Songdo Hospital?"

"How did you know I was at the hospital?"

Ahh...shit! He shouldn't have asked - forgetting that he actually hired someone to track her down!

"I uh..." His hand began scratching his non-itchy neck.

"You're nervous...don't lie," Oh...good to know that she still remembers his habits!

He sighed. "I...I tracked your mobile," She gasped. "I had to! I went to the painting shop and ahjussi told me a man picked you up! I didn't know what to do cus I - I was so paranoid and I - I broke down so many times and I didn't see the words on the painting, so I didn't know how else I can find you -"

"So you're here cus you cheated!" Her gasp became louder.

"I didn't!! I mean, yeah, I got this location but I swear, I didn't come here cus of that! I mean, I wanted to but then I accidentally kicked the painting and saw the words there -"

"You kicked my painting??"

Oh my God - this is becoming such a mess!! "It was an accident, I swear!! I was running to get ready and accidentally kicked it but it's okay - the painting's okay, I promise!!" 

"I can't believe this - first you kicked me out of your life, then you kicked my painting!" She pursed her lips and he knew then that she's trying to contain her laughter. Is she serious?? There he was - panicking like crazy - while she was joking the entire time?! 

"To be fair, I never kicked you out. You're the one who left me,"

Okay...that's probably not the best comeback Jungkook!! Not if you're trying to beg for her mercy!! She stares at him impassively - gone were the playful humor she had on her face.

"Then what should I have done...when my love said he doesn't want me anymore?" The hurt in her voice was evident, and he cursed at himself for putting it there in the first place.

"Shout. Shout at me for being stupid. For saying such absurdity. Shout at me for lying. Call me ungrateful - call me an asshole, just call me all the worst names you could think of so I'd think twice about what I had said. So I wouldn't wake up every damn night and morning searching for you and just you. Shout at me and tell me how I was your dream - all the things you've never said to me so I'd remember clearly who I was and how lucky I was -"

"I'm not your damn PA! I shouldn't be reminding you to pick me, love me! That's not what love is for me. You said you didn't love me anymore - what the hell am I supposed to say to that?!"

He welcomes her anger with a deserving smile. Finally...I get to see you fight for yourself. "No, you're not...of course you're not," He answers calmly. "You're my life. My inspiration and my muse. You're my love. I was lying when I said that. I was a coward...and I had to say that just to convince myself, I'm sorry. Everything was my fault, there was no denying it. But I also knew that I couldn't have left you if it weren't for the thought that you've given up on me. Please...forgive me, Lily,"

Her eyes glistened and he itches to have her soft cheeks in his hands...but he can't. 

"I made you cry so many times...please forgive me. I made you run here and there for me, please...please forgive me. I asked for your understanding, when I couldn't return the same. I made promises and I'm so weak that I couldn't keep them. Please Lily...forgive me. I feel like I went through hell and back, trying to find you and ask this of you. Just this. I know what I did was wrong - so wrong. And I know it's really hard for you to forgive me -"

"It wasn't hard,"

He looks back up.

"It wasn't hard to forgive you. What's hard is being away from you. What's hard is talking to eomma...and my mom and dad, pretending that we're still together when we're not. What's hard is wondering if you're okay - day by day, night by night. Forgiving you was easy. Waiting for that boy to come back to me, that's the hardest one of all,"

"That boy?"

"I..." She looks down and it's clear that she's trying hard not to cry. "I remember when I saw this boy in my class. He kept looking at me like he knows me...and I knew him. A memory from somewhere...and we made so many memories in this life - I'm keeping it for the next with hopes that maybe...maybe I'll meet him again. It's okay if you had to leave, I would still love you the same and more -"

Jungkook can't help his feet from moving and before he knows it, he's beside her - pulling her face up and kissing her. God, she tastes even better than how he remembered! He misses her lips so much that he couldn't part away - not after all they've been through together! Her breath hitched in his mouth and he knew that she's crying.

My Lily...my love...being so kind to him despite everything. I want to deserve you, please...please come back to me...

...