^ The song in the background I imagined for their kiss. 💕 

Wow! Last chapter reached 1k+ votes somehow 🥺 I was so surprised to see that! It also had 1k comments (thanks to wattpad new feature, I can press a heart against each comment!)  Thank you for so much love!

• • •

Aadarsh slowly pulled away from her. He took in a few staggered breaths. They stayed like that for a few moments. Their faces close with barley a thin layer of air between them, eyes closed and lips moist with the memory of their kiss.

He had never felt so sentiment as he felt in that moment. He had never felt so aware of himself in years, as he did in those few moments. He could hear his heartbeat loud and clear. It was astoundingly phenomenal.

It felt like being released of a prison of eternal darkness into light. The light was blinding but still palliating.

He had never imagined it to be like this. He didn't remember the last time when a mere kiss had meant so much.

Kisses had become a part of foreplay not a means of expressing affection. A kiss on the mouth was usually an appetizer for the main course which was mind-numbing pleasure-deriving sex.

In years, he hadn't kissed anyone this tenderly. In years, kissing hadn't felt so pure, so personal, so intimate. The last and only time a kiss had meant so much, it was for Siddhi.

He had always thought if he ever kissed Ruhaani it would be out of his frustration, it would be lust, it would be nothing but sexual. Howbeit he didn't feel an ounce of lust tonight. He didn't want to rip her clothes off. He had not in the remotest been thinking about sex.

He just wanted her to be happy.

He didn't want to hurt her.

He wanted her to feel special just like she made everyone around her feel.

He took in a deep troubled breath. He had kept out of trouble ever since his mother left him on his own. He used to be a boy who chased troubles, who did what his heart wanted because he knew he had his mother as his safety net.

After his mother's demise, there was no more doing stupid things, no more chasing things his heart wanted. He didn't have someone to help him up, if he fell. He didn't have anyone to show him the way, if he got lost. He had disciplined himself, made a responsible man out of that reckless stupid boy his mother had left behind.

Everything was always under his control. But, tonight nothing seemed to be in his control. Life was spiraling out of his control and he was just going with the flow.

He felt his phone buzz again in his pocket, breaking him out of his trance. His gaze gently landed on her with complete awareness. He slowly increased the distance between them. Her gaze slowly floated up to his. A few strands of her hair stuck to his cheek. Her eyes glazed over with the aftermath.

Oh God!

Her entrancing expressive eyes were spilling out the secrets of her heart. There was a softness blended with a fierceness in those brown orbs, an unapologetic strong emotion. It was both a sight to behold and a sight to be worried about.

She had to stop. This stupid pursuit would only end with her bring hurt. Why was she doing this to herself? Didn't she have any sense of self-preservation?

Wearing one's heart on the sleeve might mean courage but it also meant foolishness. Her courage was enthralling but it was also foolish. Yet, it made him feel weak. Why was he falling so weak?

His hands cascaded down from her face and he drew out the phone from his pocket. He held the phone out to her. "It's Abhi," he said, his voice coming out heavier than usual, as he glanced at the phone's screen to confirm his assumption.

Ruhaani blinked. Her heart pounded so hard, that she almost feared something was gravely wrong. In those fugitive moments, she had got everything she had carved for—his softness, his affection.

He had kissed her back! For once, her feelings felt requited. The unfading ache in her heart found a brief relief. The chaotic waves in the ocean of her heart found a shore.

She eyed him prudently as she saw that softness steadily dissipate and his mask of indifference return. She couldn't make sense of anything. It had to mean something to him, right? How could it possibly not?

She nodded, took a deep breath and lifted the call after taking the phone from his hand.

"Hello," She said, her voice sounding raspy, overwhelmed with onslaught of emotion and her recent indulgence in something that quite literally took her breath away.

Aadarsh's gaze hesitantly skirted around before falling on her. It was like a heated beam of a laser. One she couldn't ignore, but also one she couldn't meet.

Ruhaani smiled, her gaze lowered to her fidgeting fingers on her lap, as Abhi sang the birthday song for her on the line. Out of her peripheral vision, she noticed him shift away. Suddenly, the night felt cold again.

"....as soon as it stops raining. Oh, yeah, sure," she spoke into the phone and then held out the phone towards Aadarsh. "He needs to talk to you." She said softly, her eyes meeting his dark ones. A touch of the color of mushy shyness blossomed on her cheeks, as his gaze united with hers. Her breath got caught in her throat.

Aadarsh had had enough time to compose his voice and organize his jumpy thoughts while she was speaking to his brother. "Yes, Abhi." He spoke, his voice devoid of any emotion.

"Okay. Make sure you send him with an umbrella." He had never so desperately wanted a conversation to stretch on longer, as he wanted this one to. Unfortunately, Abhi had ended the call way too quickly.

"He's managed to arrange for a small car that can come through this road to pick us up. He has my location. I have additionally given him instructions to this place. The driver apparently knows this Café. So he should be here in a few minutes."

Ruhaani blinked, while watching him. She tried to make sense of his sudden talking. Aadarsh never gave unasked explanations. He just took care of the non significant stuff and no one needed to know about it. If he had to get something done, he just did it. He didn't tell others how he did or what he did. She nodded slowly, unable to think clearly.

"I will go clear the bill." He informed, his raven eyes cautiously meeting hers. He slowly got up and left to go inside.

Ruhaani took an audible long breath, once he disappeared. She ran her fingers through her hair and tucked them behind her ear. His touch still lingered on her skin and lips. Her gaze fell upon his snug coat. She slowly reached out to it and covered herself with it. She turned away to the darkness, her eyes slowly closing to relive that moment.

A tear escaped her eye. Her heart felt so full. She had never thought she'd be in a place so beautiful. She had never thought she'd be in love. She'd never thought Aadarsh would kiss her back and that too with so much tenderness. Her life had turned around since she met him, for the good. It felt like a dream. She was scared it would all end, and she'd wake up to find that it was all in her head.

She had never thought that one day, her reality would be so beautiful that she would be afraid it was all a dream.

His fingers touching her skin. His lips moving softly against hers. His hands holding her so delicately. His beautiful smile. His gentle kiss on her cheek.

She relieved that precious moments.

She almost sobbed. This was so delightfully bewitching, the feeling. This feeling, that awakened every cell of her and spread out in her chest like the most enchanting bloom. The kind of bloom that one witnessed once in a lifetime. Her lips curved up into the most heartfelt smile ever. She was almost unable to breathe. Gosh, what a beautiful feeling!

Aadarsh stepped inside the Café and let out a deep long held breath. He swallowed the lump forming in his throat. This was going to be a freaking mess.

He had kissed her. And kissed her like he...meant it.

He had ended up giving her hope. A hope he was sure by now she was wrapping herself in. A hope he was going to set on fire and destroy.

"Sir, do you need anything?"

Aadarsh turned to man. He suddenly felt low, almost unwell. He didn't want to hurt Ruhaani. She didn't deserve it.

"Yes, I'll pay the bill."

"Sure, Sir. I can get it to your table."

"No. I will wait here."

The man nodded and navigated to the corner of the room where he had a tiny billing desk.

Aadarsh sighed.

He didn't want to hurt her. The thought made him sick. He had to figure out a better solution. He couldn't return her feelings nor could he hurt her feelings by openly rejecting them. From the little he had known Ruhaani, he knew she would talk about the kiss. She would initiate the damned difficult conversation, like she adamantly always did it. Especially if he simply figured out some reason to ignore her. He had to think of something better than that.

Ruhaani opened her eyes suddenly as the flashbacks crossed her mind. She glanced at his coat, her mind called her attention to one small detail of those moments.

She had initiated that kiss! He was just wishing her. He had only kissed her cheek. But she was the one who had moved ahead to claim one for her lips. Her lower lip rolled in and she bit on it, as the awareness sunk in. She had made the move.

The realization brought about a hurricane inside her. She had made the move! He had just let her.

No, he had kissed her again. It surely had to mean something. That had to mean something. He could have just withdrawn if it was something he didn't want. Yes, it wasn't a mistake. It couldn't have been.

Ruhaani was still struggling with her perplexing thoughts and she heard him call her.

"The hotel cab is here." He said.

She nodded and got to her feet. She took a minute to wear her shoes that she had removed on the side. She picked up his coat in her hand and walked towards him.

She had never felt so fragile, so nervous as she felt under his gaze in that moment. Did he kiss her back out of courtesy? Because she was his wife and she wanted to kiss him? She couldn't put it past him.

She slowly began to move her hand that held his coat towards him. He raised his hand slowly, moving it towards hers. To take the warm coat back.

"Can I wear it?" She asked without even thinking. She didn't know why, but she didn't want to give it back.

"If you're cold, wear it." He said, gazing into her eyes. His hand dropping back to his side.

She nodded hesitantly and then held it open and slipped one arm inside. She was clumsy on purpose, and struggled to reach the other sleeve. She knew that the sleeve was inside out, but chose to foolishly struggle.

"Wait," he said noticing that the sleeve of the coat was inside out, which is why she was struggling to wear it. He quickly corrected the sleeve and held the sleeve out for her.

"Now," he said softly, his gaze falling to her face. Even in the dark, she managed to look beautiful. She titled her face up, looking at him as they stood close, with less than a foot of distance between them.

She slipped her arm in and he gently brought the front of the winter coat to her front. His gaze slowly glided up the coat to her eyes.

Their gazes met instantly, like two opposite poles of two magnets. Ruhaani took in an audible deep breath not breaking their eye contact.

He slowly let out a breath and stepped back. His fingers slowly gliding down the coat before breaking contact. Eventually his hands were back on his side. He slowly turned to the steps that led up to the landing of the café.

"Aadarsh," she said softly, as though to urge him to look back at her.

Aadarsh pressed his lips together, swallowed the lump of contrasting emotions down his throat. May be he could tell her it didn't mean anything, it just happened as a mindless urge.

"Like that won't hurt her," the small feeble voice in his head whispered.

"Mister Sehgal,"

Aadarsh was saved by the driver who had climbed up the carved steps and appeared with a big umbrella over his head and another in his hand.

Aadarsh walked down the steps of the porch. He finally turned to her. She slowly followed his trail.

Aadarsh opened the long black umbrella the man gave him. It was a wide old-fashioned black umbrella. He stepped towards Ruhaani with it open, taking her under it. "Shall we?"

She nodded meekly.

They made their way towards the steps.

"The steps are a bit slimy, please be careful with your footing." The local driver warned them.

"Heard him?" Aadarsh muttered, his gaze analyzing the wet steps ahead of them.

She turned and looked at him silently. Trying to figure out what was going on with him. Was he angry, was he pissed, was he happy, was he confused... what was it that he felt after their kiss?

"Hold my hand. We'll go down together." He suggested.

Ruhaani was confused. He was suddenly behaving normally. His normal. She expected anything but that, for some inexplicable reason.

She looked at the uneven wet steps covered with moss and other vegetation. They were marginally dryer when the had climbed up. They were now even water clogged at few levels.

She placed her hand into his right hand while his left hand held the umbrella over them, sheltering them from the incessant cold rain drops.

She took one step down and he followed her standing one step above her. She took another and he did the same, synchronously.

At the fifth, her right foot skidded forward but she had her left foot soundly placed on the previous steps. There was almost no impact other than her body swaying forward a bit. His hold on her hand tightened as he pulled her hand towards him.

"Be careful, Ruhaani." He chastised, turning to her.

"It's not my fault," she muttered irately, placing her foot firmly and then quickly moving to next. She was careful, it wasn't her fault if the steps were slimy.

"You should be careful. If you get hurt it's going to be your fault." He replied with the same tone.

"I didn't get hurt, okay?" She muttered.

"That's because I was holding your hand. Otherwise you'd fall." He countered.

"Should I start calling you my savior? Is that going to be enough reward to you."

"No thanks. Just learn to walk properly without support that would be enough." He replied indignantly.

"You can leave my hand if that's so much trouble." She replied, sharply. She couldn't believe this man. Just a while back he was kissing her, smiling at her, being all gentlemanly and now he was back to being mean jerk he was.

"I would if I could." He grumbled.

"What did you say?" She asked turning to him, they were just three steps away from the road.

"I said, my pleasure!" He said derisively and left her hand after analyzing the steps ahead. "You're on your own."

Ruhaani blinked and turned to the front, annoyed. She quickly made her way down the last three steps that were wider than the rest.

Aadarsh followed close behind her, holding the umbrella up such that none of them got drenched. The driver opened the door of the back seat of the Alto. Ruhaani sat in and scooted in. Aadarsh closed the door and walked around to the other side and sat in closing the umbrella. He dropped the umbrella in the foot place, glancing at her.

The drive had been quick and filled with silence from their side. Only the driver was talking about the change of weather.

They were greeted by Abhi at the reception of the hotel. He had come forward with a bright smile and open arms towards Ruhaani.

Ruhaani hesitated a bit before accepting his hug as he loudly delivered birthday wishes. Aadarsh's gaze noticed how Ruhaani's hands settled on Abhi's side.

It wasn't the first time. He had noticed this before too but was only now giving thought to it. Ruhaani was awkward when it came to hugs. She never returned a hug properly and he had never seen her initiate a hug, the kids were the only exception to that.

"Bhabhs!" A chirpy voice came from the passageway and Ashvi dashed towards Ruhaani. "Happy Happy Birthday!" Ashvi wished throwing her arms around Ruhaani. Once again, Ruhaani didn't hug back by snaking her arms around the other person like she did with the kids, instead she simply placed her hands on Ashvi's sides.

"I was first!" Abhi grinned at Ashvi.

"You're a traitor." Ashvi muttered. "Bhabhs, he hid my slippers, can you believe that?"

"I don't believe it. Liar. I see it on your feet!"

"I found it, you nincompoop!" Ashvi retorted, smiling. She knew his brother heavily disliked being called that now. "Anyways, Bhaiya would have wished her first."

Ruhaani who had been smiling and enjoying the banter between the two siblings, slowly turned to look at her husband as the memory of this kiss resurfaced. Yes, he had wished her first and in a way she quite couldn't ever forget. Aadarsh's gaze darted to Ruhaani's.

A soft flush glazed Ruhaani's cheekbones and she averted her gaze back to Abhi who was eyeing her with eager amusement.

"You should have stayed with us playing cards!" Ashvi spoke, "you wouldn't have got stuck in the rain."

"Oh shut up Chipmunk. They just had a romantic honeymoon evening. Unexpected rain and getting some place to take shelter is just the cherry on top. Isn't it Bhaiya?" He turned to his brother teasingly.

Aadarsh passed him a bored, not giving him the satisfaction of getting any reaction from him.

"How about you Bhabhs?" Abhi asked, gently nudging his sister-in-law's arm.

"It was very cold." Ruhaani said to drift the topic.

"And Bhai kept you warm!" Abhi said with a smile, glancing at his brother through the corner of his eyes and then at his coat that Ruhaani wore.

Ashvi cringed. "Yuck, bro!"

"I meant he gave her his coat, dumb sister of Aadarsh Unromantic Sehgal!" Abhi muttered.

The flush on Ruhaani's cheeks deepened and she lowered her gaze to her hands.

"Where are the kids? Asleep?" Aadarsh spoke up to finally put to an end Ashvi and Abhi's nonsense.

"Yes. I am surprisingly good with kids." Abhi spoke proudly. He put an arm around Ruhaani's shoulder. "Bhabhs, I was thinking I will make a better father than Bhai. What do you think?"

"He's lying. He was watching Kuch Kuch Hota Hai and bawling his eyes out over it while DJ put the kids to sleep." Ashvi said aloud as she and Aadarsh followed them up the stairs to the floor their rooms were on.

Ruhaani turned to the side look at Abhi. "I thought, you said— no romantic movies for a month?" She reminded him of the commitment he had made before her to get over his heartache.

"Yeah, KKHH is not romantic. It's sad."

"Abhi," Ruhaani said softly concerned for him.

"I am fine, Bhabhs! So, you turned thirty?"

Ruhaani turned around as they reached the landing. "Don't flip the topic. You need to stop being so ..."

"Stupid?" Ashvi offered.

"Immature?" Aadarsh supplied.

Abhi turned to both of them in disbelief.

"...vulnerable!" Ruhaani said after giving both Aadarsh and Ashvi an admonishing look. Abhi's situation about his massive crush and close friend being married was no secret. Initially, they had all expressed sympathy. But now, Aadarsh and Ashvi had made it a joke and poked fun at Abhi at every opportunity they got.

"Bhabhs, I am trying okay. You just can't erase how you feel for someone." Abhi muttered, stubbornly folding his arms.

Ruhaani didn't have anything to say in response to that because she herself felt every word he said.

"You can." Aadarsh spoke up glancing at Ruhaani before turning to Abhi. "Especially if the other person doesn't do anything to deserve them." He could feel Ruhaani staring at him. His eyes were on Abhi's. "Don't waste yourself on someone who doesn't deserve it. It's a foolish thing to do."

He slowly turned to look at Ruhaani. Hoping she would take his words seriously and apply it to herself.

"Rich coming from you," Abhi said in a low but hostile voice, firmly. His gaze met his brother's challenging one. "Anyways, some people take a forever to get over their feelings, I am just asking for a few days."

Aadarsh's gaze grew livid.

Abhi wore a smile. "I deserve a downtime to fix my feelings." He stepped forward, towards Ruhaani. "Ain't that right Bhabhs?"

Ruhaani managed a smile. Little did Abhi know that she understood what had happened. Abhi obviously knew about Siddhi. In that moment of bitterness, Abhi had called out Aadarsh for his feelings. The brothers didn't know she knew.

"While you're at it, can you also fix your vocabulary, humor and fashion sense? Also please tone down the Bollywood quotient, will yaa?" Ashvi asked.

Abhi grinned and turned to her. "One vacation one problem, my dear sister."

"Good night!" Aadarsh said aloud, interrupting the chatter and walked down the passageway. Ruhaani watched his retreating figure with a twinge in her heart.

She had forgotten about Siddhi, the woman he probably still was in love with. Abhi's words only confirmed her doubts.

"I will just check on the kids," she said.

"Bhabhs, Dj and Bua are asleep and the kids room is locked from inside."

"Oh, okay," she whispered.

"Have a good night, Bhabhs!" Abhi smiled.

She managed a weak smile. "You two too, sleep well. I am not letting anyone sleep in on a vacation. Good night!" She said and waked down the passageway.

"That was a bit out of line, Bhai!" Ashvi spoke up, once she was sure Ruhaani couldn't hear them. "You shouldn't have called out Bhaiya like that. He seemed angry."

"He's a hypocrite!" Abhi muttered. Yes he went out of line. Off late it was becoming difficult to ignore his brother's hypocrisy and his bullshit. His brother didn't give a damn about his feelings. Aadarsh didn't seem to understand that Abhi was hurting. His elder brother cared about everything else but feelings.

"Whatever Abhi!" Ashvi mumbled at they entered the room they were sharing. "Bhabhs was there too."

"She doesn't know."

"And what if Bhaiya has told her about Siddhi? You gave the impression that Bhaiya still has feelings for Siddhi."

Abhi blinked. He hadn't considered that. However, somewhere down he believed that his brother did still have feeling for Siddhi.

He let out a troubled sigh. He hadn't thought of the impact it would have on Ruhaani, if she knew about Siddhi. After a few minutes of soaking himself in guilt he had a moment of clarity. "No, she doesn't know. Two weeks back when we were going through an album... we came across a photo of Siddhi. Bhabhs had asked me who she was and I never told. She wouldn't know."

"Hmm, maybe! Anyhow, don't you think it's personal? And why do you keep teasing them, it's really eeww."

"My little dumb sister, don't worry. One day you'll be on the receiving end."

"Gosh, I should start planning to runaway with my ... soul mate in your language."

Abhi laughed. "Don't even think that far. Bhaiya will kill your soul mate."

Ashvi switched off the lights and got on the other single bed. "You know some times, I am scared. I think I am going to waste my life doing what you and Bhaiya think is right for me, what you both think is best for me."

Abhi who had just tucked himself in the blanket turned and looked at his sister across the room.

It had been a while since they had one of these honest vulnerable night time conversations.

"Hey, you know you can always tell me anything, Ash. I am not some Hitler. I am just a brother who really cares for your wellbeing and equally for your happiness."

"I know, Bhai." She said in a soft voice. "I just...I don't know. I feel this is not what I want from life. I want more."

"What is that more?"

"I don't know. It's hard to find out. I just...feel like my life begins and ends here. It's suffocating."

Abhi blinked thoughtfully and then sighed. "Maybe it's just that sudden feeling that overpowers you sometimes, for a while and it's gone."

Ashvi sighed. "Yaa Maybe."

***

It was like a flash flood had struck him. Everything was okay and suddenly it was not. There was a mad chaos everywhere. Aadarsh couldn't make sense of anything. It was one of those rare moments where his mind was conflicted and heart in ache. He didn't know if he was running away from something or still chasing something entirely different.

Ruhaani entered the room, pushing open the ajar door. Once inside she shut the door and locked it. A heavy silence fell upon the room. As she turned, Aadarsh looked at her before walking to his small suitcase. He hurriedly took out his night clothes and walked around the bed to the washroom.

Ruhaani's gaze slowly moved around the room. It was small when one compared it to the rooms in the suite but independently it was a decent modestly sized hotel room. A queen size bed was in the middle of the room. An attached washroom was on one side. The other side of the room had a small desk in one corner and two chairs with a center table on the other, with a huge window giving the view of the mountains.

Ruhaani walked to her suitcase, she dragged it out from underneath the table opened it on the floor and took out her night clothes and other essential items. She sat on the bed after she had closed and parked her suitcase back beside the table. She waited in silence for her turn to use the washroom.

Abhi's words echoed in her ears. It felt like someone was squeezing her poor heart, trying to choke it. The man for whom her feelings seemed to be deepening with every past day, seemingly still reserved his exclusive feelings for another person.

The door of the bathroom clicked open. She got off the bed and turned around. Their gazes met briefly before he walled past her.

Gosh, she wanted to cry. Why was nothing in her life fair?

Ruhaani removed the coat, laid it out on the bed. Next she removed the pullover and placed it next to it. Quietly, she walked into the bathroom.

Aadarsh let out an audible breath and stared at the closed bathroom door. He was aware of her ever action, her every movement, her every breath. He didn't know what to think of the whole situation. He decided to get in bed and pretend to be asleep before she came out.

Ruhaani was exhausted. It had been a long day. She stepped out of the washroom to find him on one side of the bed. She saw their pullovers spread out on the chair neatly. The spare blanket placed elegantly on her side of the bed. She briefly remembered how he had asked the housekeeping staff to provide them an extra blanket.

She got onto the other side of the bed, inside the duvet that had been tucked under the mattress. The same duvet he was tucked under.

"Do we really need the fan?" She asked, knowing he wasn't asleep, as she looked up at the rotating ceiling fan.

"It's at the lowest speed. There's this second layer of blanket for you." He spoke turning to her.

She nodded, wore the second blanket over the one she already was underneath and laid on the bed. "Thank you..." she said softly, turning her head to look at him. He mirrored her action looking at her.

The distance between them was small. She could hear his every breath.

"For this vacation, for choosing this place, for... everything." The last word was said after a brief meaningful pause. Her gaze eagerly searching his eyes, to see if he understood.

"You don't have to say that, it's nothing before all that you do for us." He said gently. His hand etched to touch that face again. He wanted to live that captivating moment again. Just one more time.

Ruhaani blinked and fight hard to keep the smile on her face. He didn't do anything for her. It was merely a gesture goodwill.

"Good night," her voice was reduced to an almost whisper. She quickly turned the other way before tears pricked her eyes and her cordial smile disappeared into the darkness and despair. He didn't feel the same way. That kiss probably meant nothing to him.

"Good night!" Aadarsh repeated, turning away. It was a smaller room, a smaller bed, a smaller space between them. When all he wanted was to be faraway from her, to be alone.

Aadarsh hadn't felt so vulnerable in years. Those few seconds had changed something permanently. He didn't know what exactly but they had. His relationship with Ruhaani wasn't what it had been, it had changed. He could feel it.

He had no clue why Ruhaani would have feelings for him—this version of him. She was better off alone than with him, than what he had become over years.

He closed his eyes, it seemed like fighting a lost battle. For the first time, since the wedding he was beginning to regret his decision to marry her. He hadn't taken into account her, her feelings, what she wanted from life. He had been so reckless. He should have thought this through.

He slowly opened his eyes staring at the evenly spread out curtains on the window.

Her smile, the one that bloomed on her face but whose roots went all the way to her heart played before him. Her gaze, which all but sang her feelings floated before his sight. The small things she did for everyone at home including him.

She cared for him. She tried to understand him. She tried to cheer him up when she sensed he was low. She tried to make him better. She was attracted to him. She had feelings for him.

It low-key felt nice to have someone who harbored feelings for him.

Tears welled up in his eyes. Why was she so nice?

It was like she was tearing down every mask he had been forced to wear. She was bringing to down all the shields he had placed. She was searching for him, desperately. It was strange really, she didn't even know him to be searching for him.

He didn't know himself anymore. He found refuge in being lost. She was looking for him when he didn't want to be found, at least not anymore.

The tears in his eyes sprinkled down onto the pillow. He hadn't felt this heaviness in chest for a long time now.

Stupid, stupid woman! Why did she have to be so nice? Why did she have to be nice to him? Why did she have to chose to have feelings for him? Why was she doing everything in her power to bring down all the defenses he had patiently built over years?

Why was she making him weak?

He blinked trying to fight his tears. He didn't want to hurt her. He also, didn't want to be hurt again. Those two things were on the other side of each other. He had to make a choice. Making one had never seemed so hard before.

• — • — •

Looking forward to read your thoughts.

Do you or can you love someone only because they love you?

To those who asked, my presentation was okay-okay. Not my best, neither my worst.

Coming to the new cover of the book. The previous one was a temporary cover. If you've seen most of my book covers (especially the marriage books) you'll find a pattern. The new one fits into that pattern. The older one did not, although I loved it too.

Interesting fact: Holding hands is there  in the prelude banner and the previous cover. I never knew back then that holding hands would be their thing. Also, I made sure the new cover had it :D

Also, prayers for those in flood affected areas, especially in the Himalayas.

Next : Saturday

Don't forget to vote ☆ on the chapters.

—Anami!♡