Hajun knew that falling asleep at 19:00 was a mistake! He really shouldn't be surprised that he woke up at 02:15. Maybe stealing some of Allen's dog-rose tea would get him tired enough to fall back asleep again, even if it would only result in about another 3 hours of sleep. Hajun was a little shocked he fell asleep at seven after having eaten dinner a little earlier than usual, the eldest Yeon son had had a modelling gig and instead of going to the gym, he went straight home and ate dinner with Allen, both of them EXHAUSTED; for different reasons but the both of them had been ready to keel over.

Allen had been up for practically the last three days and so the lack of sleep had finally caught up to him. The redhead hadn't even mustered the energy to put his dishes in the sink and had instead fallen asleep at the table immediately after emptying his bowl. Hajun had huffed fondly at the sight and put both his and Allen's finished bowls in the sink then put Anne's share of dinner in the fridge for them to eat when they get back after their shift.

Hajun's day had been hectic, to say the least. The blond had to skip his morning jog to make breakfast then head to do an interview regarding his modelling career which meant his usual magazine shoot was pushed back, said shoot had been exhausting because they kept having him switch outfits every 20 shots and it was draining. Hajun having to keep up the prince persona he's cultivated for himself had bit his tongue to keep from snapping at the team he was working with.

Once finished he had come to the conclusion that foregoing the gym and instead going straight home to take it easy was going to serve him better in the long run unless he wanted to risk injuring himself while attempting to work out. Entering the apartment and making dinner had been a walk in the park and a good recharge activity. The Korean had pre-prepared the ingredients needed for the evening before heading out for his interview while he was making breakfast, so throwing together a simple Chicken katsu for him and his flat-mates had taken no time at all.

He'd managed to somehow drag Allen away from... what had looked like his 3/4 done Linguistics essay rather than a new composition. Saimon-sensei must've sent him a warning saying that if he didn't turn the essay in on time he'd get his grade docked, well if threatening Allen got him to do his homework Hajun wasn't one to complain. He helped Allen to the table and sat him down in front of the bowl of Chicken katsu and then sat down himself to dig in together with the redhead.

The blond had been so famished he hadn't even realized that he'd finished his dinner and when he'd looked to the side, Allen's own bowl had been empty and the boy himself knocked out cold on the table next to said bowl. Grabbing both the dirty bowls and Anne's share of food, Hajun walked over to the sink and fridge.

Closing the fridge door Hajun heaved a sigh and went over to where Allen was asleep at the table and picked the slightly shorter male up and carried him to his room to put the redhead in bed. Making an observation on the younger's lack of weight. Frowning, Hajun made a mental note to make sure Allen got his weight up. The boy was way too light for the blond's liking, with how easy he was to carry the eldest member of BAE was sure their idiot leader weighed almost half of what Anne weighed. Which was concerning, to say the least, compared to what someone Allen's age and height should weigh.

Carrying the Eurasian male to his room took little effort and once Hajun reached his destination he carefully put Allen down on the bed and tucked him in. His lips quirked up and his eyes softened as he glanced at the younger male. It looked like he was at ease, breathing soft and body relaxed. Rising up from his crouch next to the bed Hajun went over to Allen's bench and lit the candle there using the matches next to it. When the candle was burning the blond blew out the match and threw it away. He turned towards the door, carefully left and promptly fell into his own bed after managing to make it to his own room, falling asleep the moment his head hit the pillow.

7 hours and 15 minutes later Hajun had woken up and was now carefully maneuvering his way to the kitchen through the dark apartment. Stopping briefly he noticed that Anne's shoes weren't yet in the doorway meaning they still hadn't returned from Club CANDY but were probably enroute back home.

Making it into the living room without stumbling the blond got ready to continue into the kitchen but noticed movement from the corner of his eye, looking over he saw the back of a head on the couch being lit up and promptly jumped in surprise and somehow managed to keep from screaming the Korean male did a double take and realized it was just Allen typing away on his laptop instead of being in bed catching up on sleep.

After calming his racing heart Hajun frowns, what could the younger male possibly be doing at this hour? He lifted his left hand and carefully knocked on the wall behind him to announce his presence in the room before whispering "Allen? You should be in bed asleep, what happened?"

The words were barely audible but they caused the redhead to let out an undignified scream "GHAAA! Ah, Hajun? Oh gods! I think my soul just left my body!" Allen huffs, putting a hand on his chest trying to calm his breath and willing his beating heart to slow "Don't go sneaking up on people like that! Do you enjoy giving others heart attacks?!" The shorter male growls in a whisper yell, doing his best to glare at the blond. Said glare fell short due to the dark circles under the other's eyes and the mans washed-out complexion.

Hajun's frown deepened slightly at Allen's question. Tilting his head to the right the Korean responded "I knocked on the wall... You must've been quite distracted if you missed that" The taller man gently walked over to the redhead on the couch and leaned over the back of it, arms crossed he made eye contact with the other and continued "Are you alright tho? I carried you to bed after dinner and you seemed soundly asleep then" Allen turned his head away effectively breaking the eye contact and Hajun furrowed his brows trying to decipher the other's attempt to look away.

Unable to do so in the dim lighting the blond sighed "I wasn't expecting to see you awake is all. How long have you been up anyways?" Looking at the laptop he'd been tapping away on the younger of the two made the choice to put it on the coffee table in front of him and then settled in on the couch right hand rubbing the back of his head as he let out a huff of air "I was hit by a sudden inspiration and just had to get it out, you know? I haven't paid attention to time or anything like that! Hehe~"

Hajun allowed himself one more try to get a read on the Eurasian boy that was once again looking at him; eyes scanned his features and their surroundings darting to the laptop on the table, to what the pink eyed male now noticed was scribbled on sheets of paper and back to the others face locking onto the red eyes tiredly meeting his. Closing his own eyes and letting out a sigh the oldest BAE member simply shook his head lightly and once more looked at the redhead "You aren't a very good liar you know that right, Allen?" The boy on the couch startled slightly in surprise "Huh? What do you-...?"

Leaning closer to the other over the couch the taller of the two continued "What I'm try to say, Allen; is that you weren't working on a new song just now" A huff of air left Hajun's lips "Alright let's rephrase my question from earlier, when did you get up? You weren't awakened recently that's for sure. So answer me, Allen. What time did you wake up?"

The addressed male closed his eyes and heaved a sigh and mumbled "Around eight..." One could barely make out the words spoken and the blond couldn't be sure if he'd heard correctly "Huh?" the Korean attempted to ask for clarification but didn't get the chance to as the younger repeated himself, this time louder "I've been awake since around eight in the evening. I don't really know when exactly but I could tell it was about 20-something"

Head downcast and turned away from the older, Allen opened his eyes glancing towards him from the corner of his eye "Look, Hajun, it's not that deep I swear! I woke up, couldn't get back to bed and decided to be productive! Alright?" Seeming to realize something the redhead turns back to the man leaning over his shoulder "Why're you up anyways? A little early don't ya think?" A few seconds of silence tick by before Allen speaks again this time sounding sheepish "What... time is it anyways?" Right hand was once more rubbing the back of the Eurasian boy's head as he tried to make out the numbers on the clock across the room.

The blond sighs shaking his head "It's gotta be around 02:20 by now, and to answer your question unlike you...!" A pointed glare "I actually got a decent amount of sleep! Which caused me to wake up, I was actually going to steal some of your tea so I could attempt to go back to bed" It was comical how quick the younger man's head snapped toward the taller, glaring at him ferociously "Hey!" A huff from the other as he continues without missing a beat "Want me to steep some for us? I think it'll do you good" Hajun waited a couple seconds and rose up when he received a tiny nod from Allen, continuing on his original mission to the kitchen.

The Korean male easily found all that he needed even in the darkness of the room, the man knew the place like the back of his hand at this point. Grabbing the black tea and the dried dog rose buds the blond measured out the necessary amount, placing it in a small steeping kettle and then filled it with boiling water from the electric one. The rest of the water Hajun had boiled in the electric kettle was poured into a ceramic kettle made of the same material as the steeping kettle was. He grabbed the two ceramic kettles and a heating stand, picking up a tea candle as well as the box of matches he gracefully placed everything on a tray along with two teacups from the overhead cabinet.

Grabbing the tray the young man returns to the living room and places it on the coffee table in front of the redhead settling down next to him once the trat left the man's hands, with practiced ease he places the candle in the heating stand and lights it before pouring a little bit of tea into each of the cups then topping them off with the boiled water. Once done he places the two ceramic kettles on top of each other on the heating stand. Allen looks on mesmerized while the other is preparing the two of them tea, stricken by how ethereal the blond looks in the moonlight doing something so simple as pouring tea.

Tracking the model's movements the composer watched as he stretched over the coffee table to grab the honey container placed in the middle to pour some into the two cups stirring carefully, one cup was almost spilling over with the amount of golden liquid filling it the other had a more reasonable amount poured into it. The taller grabbed the two cups and handed the one practically overflowing off to the younger who grabbed it carefully sipping some of the tea so the cup would be easier to hold.

Glancing over at the red eyed male next to him as he sips his own tea, Hajun allows the silence to stretch out between them for a few moments before heaving a barely audible sigh "So... how is it?" A look of confusion crosses his companions face and the blond has to quell a chuckle at the way the redhead mimicked a particularly cute puppy with his head cocked to the side and eyebrow raised "Pfft- the tea Allen. What do you think of the tea? Is it good?"

The other made an 'O' face and nodded somewhat timidly before answering "Yeah... Yea it's good. Thank you, I-" A pause while the boy worries his lip "I think I needed this... not-! Not just the tea but- uh... but someone- someone to... you know?" The young man trailed off as he struggled to keep eye contact and the older of the two decided to spare him by looking away slightly allowing the younger some privacy.

"Someone to care for you? Is that what you're trying to say?" The taller glanced at the other from the corner of his eye catching the barely there bob of the Eurasian boy's head and humming in response before continuing "Hmm, I think I understand" The model takes another sip of his tea and so does the musician, a comfortable silence between them as Allen slowly shifts closer to the older next to him and rests his head on his companions shoulder.

Lowering his cup of tea Hajun heaves a breath "You feel like you do not deserve to be cared for by others" A pause while he tries to find his words "And when people attempt to care for you it feels like a waste of their time. Like they could do something more valuable with it aside from caring for someone like you since you aren't of importance... right?" During the blond's speech the head resting on his shoulder had moved to turn and face him, wine red eyes stared widely at his pink ones as the man they belonged to gaped in shock at being read so easily.

Blinking the redhead quickly looked away shamefully staring down into his tea "I- How- how could-? I don't-?" A frustrated sigh leaves the younger's lips as he once again fails to formulate an answer. The Korean allows another moment of silence before once more speaking "You aren't as hard to read as you think Allen, frankly I can tell something happened for you to be sitting out here typing away at your laptop. Do... you mind telling me what?" He finishes and does his best in attempting to make eye contact with the other who seems adamant on avoiding meeting the pink colored irises capable of deciphering him so easily.

Giving up in trying to meet the eye of the shorter male he braces himself before placing his hand on the other's shoulder "Please, Allen, I beg you... talk to me. What's going on? You've been off the last few days, me and Anne are getting worried" The younger keeps stubbornly avoiding meeting his eye and the blond watches as Allen puts his now empty cup on the coffee table, doing the same to his own cup before letting out a melancholic sigh "Allen, can't you rely on us for a change? You're always there to cheer me and Anne up, let us return the favor for once. How the hell are we supposed to help if you don't tell us what's wrong?!" Hajun was getting desperate at this point, turning the boy around by the shoulders lightly shaking him as he exclaimed his concerns.

Heaving breaths as he's hanging his head in defeat lips trembling "Please... confide in me, in US; Allen. You know that we love you, flaws and all... weren't you the one who said it ''No one can always be perfect'' well, that goes for you too, idiot!" head slumps back down once the taller was done, out of breath desperately trying to fill his lungs with oxygen; eyes blurring as tears gather and he attempts to dry them away before they fall. Face dried off with the sleeve of his shirt, the older slowly looks back up at the redhead only to startle back in surprise at the wide eyes staring back at him.

The composer's eyes brimming with tears like the model's had moments earlier. The younger lets out a strangled cry "Ah- Is, is it really- Is it really okay for me to not- to not be... at, not be at my best?" Salty tears roll down of the shorter's cheeks as he makes an attempt to dry them while hiding away from the other in front of him, Hajun gently grabs his face smoothing his thumbs across Allen's cheeks wiping them away carefully. He leans his forehead on the other's as the two of them are basking in each other's presence and comfort.

Gently humming, the blond simply allows the two of them to be for a moment before speaking again "Mn, it's quite alright for you to not feel one-hundred percent" The two of them hold eye contact and the redhead lets out a quiet sniffle before the older keeps going "After all, if there's anything I've learned from you; it's that vulnerability isn't something bad and that to show it isn't a weakness but a strength..." Hajun felt like there was a need to say more but held off on saying anything at all and instead embraced the other.

Feeling the younger's head nod against his chest the taller tightened his arms in response but let them fall when the boy in his arms straightened up, still the model lightly held onto the other's arms. A moment of silence and Allen's head turned slightly to glance up at him before the man spoke up "I-... uhh. The reason I haven't been myself lately is... because- You see I- UGH!" Gripping his hair in frustration and pulling at it the redhead lets out a broken whine.

Acting quickly the Korean takes hold of the hands abusing the hair of the person they belong to and tries to get the boy to loosen his grip and let go of the strands before there's no more hair to pull at "Hey! No, don't do that. Stop please, nae sarang. We don't pull at our hair, Allen; you know that" Slowly, Allen releases his hair, and Hajun coos "See there we go, now give me your hands. You don't need to get worked up you know, we can take our time and breathe"

Hajun gently rubs his thumbs on top of the other's knuckles in an attempt to calm him down. Another whine reaches the blond's ears and he softly shushes the younger male before another moment of silence stretches out between them. The only sound Allen's heavy breaths as he struggles to regain the ability to properly take in oxygen.

Soon enough the redhead's breathing evens out and wine red eyes squint at nothing in particular as the owner frowns "Grr, it's so stupid! I should be able to speak like a normal human being!" A frustrated huff leaves him before the Eurasian male continues "Yet here I am unable to formulate words! UGH! It shouldn't be so hard to be a functioning person, so WHY-?!" The Korean patiently waits for the other to continue, never once letting go of his hands to ensure that they don't return to pull at the red strands of hair.

So caught up in soothingly rubbing Allen's knuckles the Korean practically jumps out of his skin when the other suddenly exclaims "WHY AM I LIKE THIS? WHY? WHY AM I SO BROKEN?!" A few gasps of air "No wonder my parents never understood me fully! I'm not normal, but something that needs fixing! I-... I tried Hajun! I really did try... to be what they wanted of me!"

Gritting his teeth he sucks in a breath through them before continuing "But I could never do anything RIGHT! I always, ALWAYS; did something wrong! Either I failed in eye contact or I would hold eye contact but not be listening to what they said! Not playing the score as written, not understanding a concept! Failing to comprehend social norms... WHY? Hajun! Why am I broken?! Why couldn't I just be born NORMAL?!" Tears were once more brimming in wine red eyes and the older let go of the hands he was holding to let him wipe the falling droplets of salt.

Blond strands of hair obscures his vision as the addressed male attempts to properly formulate himself, taking a bracing breath he allows "What even is normal anyways" to slip past his lips and the younger's head shoots up, confusion painting his features.

The Korean's head flies up to face the other before he continues "You know ''normal'' is just a social construct created by people incapable of thinking outside the box, Allen. I can with certainty tell you that by no means are you broken! Whoever said that you ever were, is stupid! You, Allen; are an incredible human being. There has never been, nor will there ever be; a need for you to change yourself for what society deems acceptable. You, me and Anne may be different from those called ''normal'' people but I personally think being different is better than to be like everyone else! And you should too, Allen" Feeling proud of his speech Hajun quietly celebrates as he awaits a response.

Moments pass and eventually the redhead speaks up once more "You- You really think I'm not broken?" The model gives a nod and the composer continues "That- I- That's good to hear... it quells some of, I mean it puts to rest a couple of worries I've had as of late" The Eurasian male seems like he wishes to say more, but instead worries his bottom lip; unable to formulate anything else he keeps quiet.

Pink eyes narrows as their owner takes in the new information, mulling it over until coming to a conclusion "Does these worries happen to have anything to do with why you're sitting here doing homework instead of writing away on new compositions?" Hajun once more had to hold back a chuckle at his precious companions reaction, wine red eyes stare at him widely as Allen seems to be questioning weather or not the blond can read minds.

"He looks like a puppy" The thought is brief as the taller boy shakes his head in amusement before correcting the other "I'm not blind, Allen. I have two perfectly functioning eyes that I am able to use in gathering information. Even in the dark I can tell that you've been typing out your handwritten essay for Saimon-sensei's class" He motions towards the laptop and loose papers littering the coffee table before looking back at the younger "You only do homework when you're trying to get your mind off of things that are troubling you. That or me and Anne are forcing you to do it" An offended look is thrown his way but the Korean ignores it as he continues "Anyways, what I'm saying is; you have recognizable patterns and that it is quite easy to tell when you're trying to forget something unpleasant" He shrugs as he finishes off his observation "So... am I right?"

Defeated the redhead slumps down and gives a nod "Yeah... Yeah you're right" He heaves a sigh and moves to sit back next to the model, head once more resting on the other's shoulder "I've- I have been remembering some things that were completely repressed. Stuff I didn't even remember having experienced, due to how badly I was affected by the trauma I see in my trap reactions" A shiver runs through the musician at the thought of his parents burning his treasure "You see, recently I started waking up from nightmares"

Wine red eyes glance at pink, gauging the reaction but they stay carefully neutral so Allen continues "I originally didn't remember what they were about so it was pretty easy to go back to sleep and forget that I had a nightmare in the first place. I would simply get a glass of water and go back to bed, but then; the nightmares started getting more and more vivid. I'd wake up remembering bits and pieces, a couple words or flashes of images. The more time passed the more I'd remember, the more I'd have trouble falling asleep..." Trailing off the redhead looks over at his empty cup and decides to fill it with tea again, more so to buy himself time to find the right words to continue than that he wanted more.

Grabbing hold of the pot with tea he carefully pours some into the cup he'd placed on the coffee table. Glancing at Hajun the younger motions to the teapot and then to the other's own cup, a silent question which he receives a nod to and pours some tea into that cup as well. Placing the pot with tea in it on the table he garbs the pot with the hot water and fills the two cups, leaving enough space for honey and then places the teapots back on the heating stand. Moving on to pouring the honey in he then grabs the two mugs and hands Hajun's to him before again settling down next to him and sipping his tea.