Is this how liking someone feels like? Is this how Changmin felt when he think about me? Why am I even comparing myself to Changmin of course we are not the same, Changmin is just an obsessive psychopath why would we be the same?

“Hey baby, are you awake?”, thinking of the devil, here he comes in the middle of the night again. It creeps me out whenever he do that. Who knows what he might be doing while I was sleeping unconscious.

I didn’t answer and pretended to be asleep. He sigh and enter anyways.

“I’m sorry I forced you to watch me today when I know you were not feeling well since the beginning. I just cant stop the feelings of happiness by knowing you watching me work hard”

And there goes again, the guilt trap. But I still did not respond and continue acting.

“I know you’re awake. Its okay, I just need you to hear that. Goodnight! I love you”

My heartbeat speed up at his last word. “Changmin?”, my mouth act faster than my mind and I just wanted to tape it myself right there.

Changmin stop from walking out and look back in anticipation. I sit up and stare at him walking back towards me again.

“When will I get a friend of my own?”

His expression change to a serious one and sit on the edge of the bed.

“Why? I can cancel all of my classes and be with you if you’re feeling lonely. Just tell me Y/N, I will do anything for you”, he was close to tearing up and I slowly started losing it again.

“Changmin…lets get a doctor. I will take care of you”

His eyes darkened after my words. I don’t know why did I mention that as well. He stood up and pull me and grasp on my arms harshly.

“You think I’m crazy like everyone else right?”, his anger and his tears mixed up which frightened me.

“Its not like that Changmin!”

“Then why? Why are you afraid of me?”

That wasn’t even a question. He should’ve already known by now that why would I be afraid of him.

“Changmin let go! You’re hurting me!”

The moment he realize what he was doing, he pull away his hand and continue mumbling an apology. I massage my arms and look at his state. He was staring at nothing, like he have no soul. It was scary. Then he ran out.

When I wake up in the morning, Changmin wasn’t there and I went to the University alone. It was peaceful yet bothering. Yes he is crazy but I don’t have the right to call him that. Yes he is crazy, that’s why it bothered me so much of what he must be doing right now.

I couldn’t concentrate all day seeing the empty seat of Changmin not being occupied the whole day. Normally I would be happy and free to talk to anyone but it was bothering me so much to the point I didn’t talk to anyone.

In the evening, I went home alone and waited until I heard the doorknob being opened.

Changmin enter wearing a hoodie and I quickly walk towards him.

“Where were you?”, I ask curiously.

“Why do you care?”, he snap back showing his face a little.

I quickly noticed a small cut in his lips stood in front of him.

“Did something happened?”, my voice gets smaller and my hand reach towards his hoodie. He didn’t stop me so I pull it down and gasp seeing his face covered with bruises and cuts, not only his lips.

“Changmin…”

“I’m fine!”, he tried to walk away from me but I held him.

“Let me treat your wound first”, I plead again. I may hate him but I also worry about his current state. I don’t even know myself anymore.

“The only thing needed to be healed here is my heart Y/N”