Being Watched

Chapter 8

The week couldn’t pass any slower. I think it’s because I’ve been constantly thinking about Friday night. I tried to stop thinking about it, hoping that time will pass faster but it didn’t work.

And finally, after what seems like months, Friday arrives.

The day passes slowly like every other day this week. Jeremy reminds me again in class of the meeting and I pretend as if I had forgotten.

“Don’t forget the meeting tonight,” he had said.

“Oh right!” I replied.  “What time again?”

“I’ll pick you up at seven,” he said and I nodded.

Hah! As if I could forget about this.

Even though I didn’t hang out with his group of friends another time this week, they were starting to acknowledge me more.

It feels like I’m slowly starting to fit in. I mean it’s been around a month so I should be starting to fit in. November started this week and the weather is now much colder. I never liked that month because it’s always been so depressing with the start of the rain and cold. Plus, being in the middle of the first term at school didn’t help. It seems so far away from Christmas break.

When the final bell rings, I almost do a happy dance but I don’t want to embarrass myself so I just grin widely as I grab my cell phone and head out.

Back at home, I decide to take a nap. I don’t bother putting an alarm because I know that my parents will be home soon and they will wake me up for dinner.

It’s six when dad wakes me up for dinner. We eat together like every other day and my parents ask about school and the usual stuff.

Then excitement fills their eyes as they talk about the meeting I’m attending with Jeremy tonight. They were so happy when I told them I’m going to a meeting at church.

I feel slightly guilty because I agreed to go just because it means that I get to spend time with Jeremy.

It’s not like I’m not going to try. If the people there help me find some answers, simplify things, or just make my faith strong again, then I’ll work on myself and I’ll make an effort to give my religion another chance.

After dinner, I quickly run up to my room to change since I’m still in my school uniform. I put on my black skinny jeans and a white ‘I ♥ Greece’ hoodie that Martha got me when she traveled to Greece last year.

The doorbell rings as soon as I finish tying my shoelace. I quickly put on some perfume, grab my cell phone, shove some money in my pocket, and rush downstairs.

“Hey,” Jeremy says when he sees me.

“Hi,” I reply, smiling at him.

My parents are smiling proudly at him, making me roll my eyes. Before mom could start a conversation about religion with him, I say, “Bye mom, bye dad!”

“Bye!” They reply and I close the door behind me.

“Your parents seem happy,” he says and I chuckle.

“They’re just happy that I’m going to church,” I reply.

“They go to church?” He asks.

“Every week,” I answer. “And they pray all the time!”

“That’s great!” He says, grinning.

“I guess,” I reply, shrugging.

“When did you stop going to church?” He asks, glancing at me from the corner of his eye before focusing on the street again as we walk side by side.

“What makes you think I used to go in the first place?” I ask skeptically.

“If your parents are so religious then I’m pretty sure they used to take you to church with them,” He replies. Makes sense, I think.

“Yeah well I stopped going at around the age of fourteen,” I reply. I remember the day I told my mom that I didn’t want to attend the ceremony on Sunday. She argued with me at first, saying that I have to and I replied by telling her, ‘God gave us the freedom to do whatever we want. We have the freedom to choose him or not.’ That made her stop arguing and she just gave me a disappointed look I couldn’t erase from my memory no matter how hard I tried. I hate disappointing people but I felt like I was wasting my time while going t church because my faith wasn’t the same.

“Hmm,” he says, cutting my thoughts. “It’s time for you to willingly start going to church again.”

That’s when I notice that we are standing at the bottom of a staircase. I don’t reply to what he says because I’m not sure if it’ll happen or not.

Jeremy walks up the stairs as if it’s his own home. This doesn’t surprise me because he comes here twice a week; on Friday for this meeting and on Sunday for the ceremony.

He stops on the first floor and walks to where a white metal door is.

“The church is up there,” he says, pointing to the next staircase leading to the other floor. “But we have our meeting in the room here.”

“Okay,” I say, tearing my gaze away from the staircase. I haven’t been inside a church for a long time…

He smiles as he opens the door and walks in. I walk in after him and look around the room that has three rectangular wooden tables set in a U-shape and plastic chairs everywhere and some in a stack to the right. There are three wooden closets to the left of the room and bookshelves with several large books on them. There are around fifteen teenagers that stop chatting and glance at us when they see the door opening.

“Hey!” They call out and Jeremy waves.

“I see you brought someone new,” A guy who seems older than the rest— around thirty-five— says.

“Yeah, this is Stephany,” Jeremy introduces me as I stand there awkwardly just like I did the first day at school. “She’s a new girl at my school.”

I would’ve preferred something along the lines of ‘she’s my friend’. I didn’t have time to sulk because everyone was staring at me and saying their ‘hellos’.

“Hi,” I say awkwardly, waving at them.

“Don’t be shy!” The older guy says, laughing like a kid and I laugh awkwardly.

“I have cupcakes!” He then says excitedly like a kid who just ate too much sugar. He kind of reminds me of Jack. “But not for now. They’re for after the meeting!”

“Um,” I start awkwardly, turning my gaze to Jeremy. “Is this the guy who does the meeting topics?”

Jeremy lets out a laugh and shakes his head.

“What’s so funny?” A girl asks, appearing out of nowhere. She is a bit shorter than me and has brown hair and hazel eyes. Her hair is cut short and on her nose is a pair of eyeglasses that look really good on her face. She’s dressed in black pants and a pink sweater with a smiley face on it.

Jeremy smiles at her and kisses her cheek before wrapping an arm around her shoulders casually. I’m almost dying of jealousy but I try not to let it show because that won’t end well.

“Stephy is asking if Frank is the one who gives the topics,” Jeremy says and the girl laughs. Okay so now I know that the older guy’s name is Frank.

“Nope, Frank is like the class clown here,” she says. “He’s such a kid. The person who usually gives out the topics is Marcia and sometimes we have guests like priests who give us some topics.”

“Oh,” I say. “And who’s Marcia?”

“She’s not going to be here today. Her little son is undergoing surgery for his foot so she has to be at the hospital with him,” the girl says.

“So Father Mark is our guest tonight and he’ll be giving us the topic,” Jeremy finishes for her.

“Father Mark? The one at school?” I ask, confused.

“The one and only!” A different voice says and I turn around to find Father Mark smiling at me.

“Hi,” I say shyly, returning his smile. He’s always so happy!

He’s about to say something but he’s interrupted by Frank calling him from the other side of the room.

I turn back around to face Jeremy and find him with his arm still around that girl. Without thinking, my eyes narrow slightly at his arm but I quickly stop, averting my gaze to the girl, before they notice.

“I still didn’t get your name,” I tell her with a slight smile even though I’m so jealous of her right now.

“Liana,” she says and I nod.

“It’s nice to meet you,” I say and she smiles.

“It’s nice to meet you too,” she replies.

Before we could say anything else, Father Mark tells us to sit in a circle so a few people put the plastic chairs in a circle in the middle of the room and we all sit down.

I’m sitting between Jeremy and a blond girl I don’t know.

“Since Stephany is new here, each person is going to tell her his or her name and answer a question of her choice,” Frank says then his gaze moves to me and he continues talking, “Pick a question you would like everyone to answer.”

“Um their favorite color,” I blurt out and almost face-palm. Out of all the questions in the world I had to choose this? How stupid.

I really don’t work well when I’m put on the spot.

Frank laughs that childish laugh of his then coughs to hide it while I just blush.

“I like her already!” He suddenly says, making me blush harder. “Okay I’ll start!”

Wow, hyper much?

“I’m Frank and my favorite color is white,” he says and then everyone starts saying their names with their favorite color.

I memorize most of the names for now but I know I’ll be mixing up a bit.

“Let’s start,” Father Mark says when we’re done with the names thing. Everyone stands up and I stand up too.

Frank then starts reading some sort of prayer from an orange book. It’s short so I don’t space out. When he’s done we sit in our chairs again.

“Okay,” Father Mark says, clapping his hands together. “Today we are going to do a little activity to see what God’s message is for every one of us.”

He takes ropes out of a plastic bag and I stare at him with confusion.

He tells us to join our hands together and he starts going around, tying each person’s wrists together. He ties my wrists together and every time I move my hands, the rope rubs against my skin, making it red.

“The more you move, the more it will hurt so stay still,” He tells us as he goes back to his seat and takes out from the same plastic bag a box with colorful papers inside and something written on each paper.

“Every person among us feels like a prisoner in this world and God is the only one that could set us free but most of the time, we don’t know what God wants from us or what we should do to be free and get the inner peace we’re looking for so tonight we’re going to pray and ask God to give us a message.”

“Every paper has a verse from the Bible and every person will pick one paper and read it out loud. You can share your thoughts or you can keep them to yourself but when you read the verse, I’ll cut the rope which is like a symbol that you’ll be free because you’ll know exactly what to do to get what you’re looking for.”

At first I’m not sure whether I like this activity or not. I decide to wait till it’s over and see the result. People start picking a paper each and reading it out loud. Most of them just smile or nod seriously as Father Mark cuts the ropes tying their hands.

I am shocked when I see one girl’s reaction. Her name is Frieda and she’s a bit shy. She picks a light blue paper and reads it out loud:

“But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.”

When she reads the last word, her voice cracks and she starts crying. I am stunned as I stare at her. What just happened? I think but when I look around I see everyone giving her tender smiles or tearing up a bit.

I look at Jeremy who is smiling slightly and whisper, “Why is she crying?”

“It’s good to be back,” Frieda finally says, her voice sounding weird from crying.

Father Mark smiles at her and gives her a hug.

“She started coming again last week. She stopped coming to church around a year ago and got mixed up with the wrong people. Almost died of a drug overdose around a month ago but now she’s back,” he whispers and I nod, feeling slightly chocked up because that verse fit her situation perfectly.

Some people share how the verse they pick is just what they need and when my turn comes, I’m feeling slightly anxious because I don’t know what to believe. A part of me is saying that these are coincidences but another part believes that God really gives everyone a message.

Father Mark puts the box in front of me and I just stare at it for a few seconds. There are about a hundred papers in there, a hundred messages… I feel like I’m running out of oxygen and my heart beats furiously in my chest as I grab a random paper with shaky hands.

I take a deep breath and read what I picked.

“Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.”

My world starts spinning. I don’t even notice Father Mark cutting the ropes that are tying my wrists. My hands are still clapped together even with the ropes gone and I just stare at the paper in my lap.

But how…?

It has to be a coincidence! These are all just coincidences!

A voice inside me is telling me that it’s not by luck and I try to find an explanation to what’s happening.

I don’t even listen to the others as they pick papers and read them. All I can think about is the paper that I randomly picked.

“Cupcakes for everyone!” Frank’s loud voice stops my internal battle and I look around and see everyone standing around the tables where the cupcakes are.

I move my hands away from each other and stand up. I put the paper in my pocket and join the rest of the group.

I don’t take a cupcake however because I can’t eat right now. I’ll throw up.

“Stephany, what do you think?” Father Mark asks me, a cupcake in his right hand.

“I-I don’t know,” I say honestly. Something inside me changed during that meeting and I don’t know if it’s a good thing or a bad thing. “What I know is that I’m definitely coming back here again.”

He smiles at me. “That’s a start.”

I nod because I don’t know what else to say. Is it a start to regain my faith? Is it a start to find God? Is it a start to open the door?

“I’ll see you at school,” Father Mark says before saying goodbye to everyone and leaving.

Jeremy walks over to me a few minutes later while eating a cupcake.

He says something with his mouth full and I don’t understand a single word. I wrinkle my nose at him.

“Swallow before speaking,” I order him. He swallows and smiles sheepishly.

“Do you want a cupcake?” He asks.

“No, thank you,” I reply, smiling slightly. He’s so cute!

Oh God I’m so in love with him, aren’t I?

How can I possibly think that a guy speaking with his mouth full is cute? I feel like hitting my head against a wall but that would be just awkward.

“Are you sure? They’re delicious,” he says, interrupting my mental face-palm.

“Yeah, thanks,” I reply and he shrugs.

For the next ten minutes, they just talk about their schools or their families and people start leaving.

“Let’s go, Stephy,” Jeremy says when there are only a couple of people left.

I follow him outside after we say our goodbyes to the others.

We walk back down the stairs in silence, each person lost in their thoughts. We keep on walking in silence in the darkness, no one saying a word.

When we’re halfway to my house, I speak up, because I feel like I have to tell him this.

“Jeremy?” I start.

“Hmm?” He mumbles, glancing at me for one second only before averting his gaze forwards again.

“Um thank you,” I mumble shyly.

He doesn’t reply.

We keep on walking in silence, my thoughts drifting back to the meeting. I want to attend other meetings because I want to know the truth. I want to know if this was a coincidence or not.

Soon we arrive to my house and we both stop walking. I’m not sure what to say so after a few seconds, I look up at him.

My eyes meet his and I try to figure out what he’s thinking but they’re blank.

“See you on Monday,” he finally says and starts walking away. That’s it?

I blink a couple of times before grabbing his arm, stopping him from moving.

He turns around and looks at my hand which is holding his arm. I quickly remove it and look away, blushing.

“Are you going to walk on your own in the dark?” I blurt out, looking at my shoes.

There’s a pause then in a teasing voice Jeremy says, “Are you worried about me?”

“Uh I-I um n… you… I,” I stammer then sigh. “Yes,” I finally admit.

He chuckles. “Don’t worry about me, Stephy, I always walk back home.”

“Are you sure?” I ask uncertainly.

He rolls his eyes at me. “Stop worrying, I’ll be fine! You’re worse than my mom,” he mutters the last part but I hear him.

“Of course your mom is going to worry about you walking on the streets alone at night!” I say.

“But you’re not my mom,” he points out, clearly enjoying the conversation.

“I still worry about you walking alone in the dark!” I snap. He smirks and when he’s about to say something I cut him off.

“And stop teasing me!”

He just laughs at me while I scowl.

“You worry too much considering you just met me a month ago,” he says, still chuckling.

Hah! That’s what you think. I’ve known you for three years. Of course I don’t voice out my thoughts. Instead I say, “What if you were attacked by-by,” and it’s one of those moments when it feels like there’s a hole in your brain and you just can’t think of anything. “A cat?” I finally blurt out and he bursts out laughing. This time I actually face-palm.

A cat? WTF brain?

“You’re too cute,” he finally says and my heart skips a beat.

I’m already blushing and his words aren’t making it better!

“I’ll tell you what,” he then says. “Give me your number and I’ll text you when I get home safely.”

“I’m not sure if you’re asking that so that you’ll reassure me or just because you want to have my number,” I say, narrowing my eyes skeptically.

He laughs and shakes his head. “It’s a win-win situation,” he says, shrugging and I chuckle as I give him my number. It’s a win-win situation for me too.

“I have to go,” he says when my number is saved in his contact list. “Bye.”

“Bye,” I say and he starts walking away as I walk to my front door.

“Oh and Stephy,” he calls out, making me stop walking. “I’ll pick you up again next Friday so don’t make any plans.”

Not waiting for a reply, he turns back around and starts walking down the street, towards his house. I smile as I unlock the front door and walk in.

 “How was it?” Mom and dad ask me.

“Good,” I reply, shrugging as I walk into the kitchen to get some water.

“Care to elaborate more?” Dad asks sarcastically from the living room and I smile as I lift the glass of water to my lips.

“Let’s just say, I’m going again next Friday,” I reply.

“And you’re going to church on Sunday?” Mom asks excitedly.

“Still too soon,” I reply as I walk into the living room. “I’m still figuring things out.”

She nods and I can see the happiness in her eyes, knowing that I’m trying again. Religion has always been important to her.

I sit on the couch next to my dad and take the remote from him. I switch through the channels till I find a movie for us to watch. They don’t complain so we watch it in silence.

Around ten minutes later, my phone beeps and I read a message from an unknown number:

I arrived home safely without any cat attacks :)

I smile as I save his number to my contact list.

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Hey! :)

First of all I would like to thank every single one of you for voting and commenting on the previous chapter. Your votes and comments put a huge smile on my face --> :D

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