Just like making the decision to leave, my first months in the States were so terrible that I almost went home because I struggled a lot in coping with my new environment and I also missed my friends and family. Mabuti na lamang ay mabait ang mga naging kasabayan ko pati na rin ang manager na napunta sa akin kung kaya't kinaya ko pa. Miss Alyja Kirsten was also kind and supportive of me, sa katunayan ay siya ang naging gabay ko sa mga unang buwan ko. She was the one who helped me adjust, lalo na't unang beses ko palang makapunta ng ibang bansa. I was ignorant.

It was pressuring, lalo na kapag nagsasabay-sabay ang acads at trabaho, at kung ano-ano pang mga issue. Aaminin ko, maraming beses ko nang ginustong sumuko, but I am glad that I still decided to continue, dahil kung hindi ay malamang wala ako sa kinatatayuan ko ngayon.

I was a Le Vrai model during my first two years in the company and later I became a brand ambassador. Noong una ay hirap ako dahil sa mga pagkakaiba ko sa mga kasamahan ko. Bullies are everywhere and social media, just makes it worse. There were so many harsh words that I've received and I would be a hypocrite if I say that it didn't affect my mental health. But later on, I just got used to it. Lalo na no'ng tuluyan ko nang maunawaan ang goal ng Le Vrai, which is beauty in diversity.

It was such a cool brand and I felt lucky, so I did my best to be worthy of the opportunity given to me.  I share the brand's advocacy to others every time I am given a chance, because a lot of people needs to know it.

I smiled as I tapped my fingers on the armrest of the chair. I remembered that I was so insecure back then, I hated myself so much, and I felt so ugly...na siyang naging dahilan ng pag-alis ko. Now, thankfully, I am already over that self-hate phase.

It wasn't an easy thing to do especially after what I've been through, but through the years, I was finally able to realize and see the good qualities I have. Hence, I learned to fall in love with myself.

Masaya ako na sa tuwing nananalamin ako ngayon ay nakangiti na akong tinitingnan ang sarili ko at masaya dahil sa mga nakikita. I grew while I was away and I'm proud of myself for that.

I had been through a lot of heartbreaks already but now, I know longer have regrets  nor resentments, dahil kung hindi naman dahil sa past ko ay hindi ako magiging 'ako'  ngayon.

As for my life, I am already content with what I have now. 'Di man ako mayamang-mayaman ay masaya na ako. 'Di man ako naging TV host, I already consider myself as someone who's successful in her own craft. Kasi noon, simple nga lang ang gusto ko eh...kahit anong trabaho, basta marangal at makapagprovide sa pamilya. But now, I achieved further than that and I'm so thankful.

"Grabe, gutom na gutom ako kanina. Paano kasi ang daming pasyente tapos mag-isa lang ako doon. Muntik nang 'di nakeri ng powers ko, siz." Maya ranted. Magkavideo call kami ngayon habang naghahanda ako para sa isang promotional shoot.

"Pero nakeri mo, lakas mo talaga!" I commented while applying eyeshadow on my lids.

"Syempre naman...sa isang bagay lang naman ako hindi malakas eh." She laughed but there's no humor at all. Nagpakawala nalang din ako ng isang maliit na ngiti. "Pero hayaan na natin, 'di lang talaga siguro para sa akin."

Tumango-tango ako habang nag-a-apply ng lipstick. "Yeah, right. Not destined for us."

She sighed and laughed. "Maiba naman ako, kailan ka naman uuwi? Miss na kita, naiinis na ako kay Yuri dito, lagi nalang akong gi-no-ghost. Ako nga 'tong dapat busy, pero siya pa ang laging busy. Ang ending, laging drawing."

Natawa naman ako sa pagtatampo ni Maya. It's been years since we saw each other, simula kasi no'ng pumunta ako ng US ay hindi pa ako nakakauwi, because I was always busy at kung hindi busy ay ang pamilya ko naman ang bumibisita sa akin dahil gusto naman nilang pumasyal.

My mom still didn't come to see me though. Medyo nakakalungkot but I don't carry grudge, dahil casual din naman kami sa isa't isa. She send messages every week to ask kung kumusta na ako at para sa akin, okay na 'yun. Masaya na ako do'n.

"Malapit na," I smiled at Maya.

Our company has an upcoming collaboration with a skincare brand in the Philippines at kasali ako sa project na 'yun, kung kaya't pagkatapos ng ilang taon ay makakauwi na rin ako. Sa wakas.

I was a little scared to go home back then, pero ngayon ay masasabi kong hindi na rin 'yun gano'n. I've already moved on from what happened at isa pa, miss na miss ko na rin ang pamilya ko, kaibigan, at ang lugar kung saan ako lumaki.

"Yow!"

Gulat akong napalingon at agad din naman akong ngumiti no'ng makita ang isang pamilyar na mukha. I just arrived from the States and Jae's the first friend I met dahil siya lang ang available. Maya's out for a medical mission kasi, samantalang si Yuri ay may business trip.

I looked at the man in front of me and smirked. Ang laki rin ng pinagbago ni Jae, he looked matured now, but in a good way. At ang loko, sikat ng professional basketball player. Akala ko noon ay hindi niya i-pu-pursue ang pagbabasketball pero narealize niya na 'yun pala talaga ang passion niya. And now, he's one of the most popular basketball player in the country.

"Akala ko 'di mo na ako sisiputin," I joked before hugging him. "Ganito ba talaga kapag iniiwan? Tumatangkad?" I laughed and he immediately looked offended.

"Grabe ka, Elliana Grazella. Palibhasa ikaw nakamove-on na kuno."

I smirked. "At least nakamove-on. Eh ikaw, hindi pa, 'diba?"

Muling sumama ang timpla ng mukha.

"Woy, gagi. Walang gano'n. Walang hindi magmomove-on sa pamilyang 'to."

Ayos 'to ah, unang kita pagkatapos nang ilang taon, asaran agad ang intro.

"Ikaw, umalis ka na't lahat lahat, 'di ka pa rin tumatangkad. Uso lumaklak ng Growee!"

I rolled my eyes. "Duh, 'di ko kailangan ng height. Cute ko kaya!"

His face turned sour pero ramdam ko naman na masaya siya.

Jae and I started talking about things, catching up lang.

"Musta ang puso mo?" I asked him and smiled.

"Sus, alam mo na 'yun. Bakit ka pa nagtatanong? Sinabi ko naman na sa videocall ah."

I raised a brow and laughed a little. "Loyal talaga eh."

Agad naman siyang sumimangot at nagpakita ng hindi pag sang-ayon. "Ikaw? Kumusta puso mo?" He suddenly asked me which kind of startled me.

"Ayos, masaya ako. Bakit ba?"

He smirked. "Nakamove-on ka na talaga? Weh?"

It's my turn to frown. "Tagal na nun. Nakapagmove-on na ang lahat."

He raised a brow. "Hindi mo ba na-miss?"

"Why would I miss him?"

Naningkit naman ang mata ko no'ng tumawa siya. "Baka lang naman. By the way, balita ko matagal nang CEO 'yun ah."

I pursed my lips. "Balita ko rin...nachika ni Maya at Yuri. But I don't really care, bakit naman kasi?" I laughed a little.

"You sure? Paano kung makita mo bigla?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Edi...makita? Hindi na kami teenager para magtaguan pa at habulan. I would at least be civil with him, pareho naman na kaming matured ngayon."

Jae placed his hand under his chin and smirked while looking at me. "Bukas meeting niyo?"

Tumango ako bago sumimsim sa kapeng inorder.

"Good luck. Wala, feeling ko lang kailangan mo 'yan." He said before giving me a smile.

It was a weird smile, I thought. And now, I already knew why. That jerk knew something.

I continued tapping my fingers on the armrest of the chair I am sitting at, while looking at the man who just spoke.

Kaleb Louis Flores.

It's been almost six years since we last saw each other and up until this day I could still vividly remember the last time I saw him.

It was a sad farewell glance, as I was still so hurt and in love with him back then. But now, as I look at him, I only want to feel happiness for both of us...for moving forward from the past. Ayoko nang magalit dahil nakakapagod sa puso, mukha rin naman kasing nagbago na siya...o sana nga.

Sa nakikita ko naman ngayon...his vibe changed a lot, mas lalong naging mukhang tahimik at seryoso, and he seemed to be so professional now. Sa pananalita, kilos, at overall aura niya ay masasabi mong nag-mature na nga siya.

"What do you think about the proposal?" My manager asked after the terms were discussed.

Tumango ako. "I like it."

She smiled. "Yeah, right. Mr. Flores is indeed great."

I pursed my lips and smiled. Hindi ko pa maisip kung paanong naging CEO ng isang skincare company si Kaleb gayo'ng ang course niya no'ng college kami ay Architecture. Pero hindi ko na dapat pang problemahin 'yun. The important thing is that...he's here and he looks well.

"So...next week will be the tentative start of photoshoots and campaigns and two weeks from now will be the release..."

Kahit na medyo pagod ay sinubukan kong i-absorb lahat ng dinidiscuss dahil sa tuwing may project ay ayokong wala akong alam, dahil gusto kong makatulong at magawa ng maayos ang trabaho ko.

Ilang beses na nagtama ang mga mata namin habang nakaupo siya sa harap. Ewan ko, hindi ko naman sinasadya iyon, napupunta lang talaga sa harap ang mata ko dahil naroon ang presentation. But every time our eyes met, ay medyo nakakailang 'yun, lalo na't nakatingin din siya sa akin. Nakatingin na not in a bad way though, his gaze was very professional, but since I'm an introvert ay natural na sa akin na maging awkward sa mga gano'ng bagay.

I may develop confidence and all, pero ang introvert personality ko ay hindi na nagbago pa 'yun.

The presentation ended at nakahinga naman ako nang maluwag dahil doon. People started leaving the room but I still couldn't dahil kailangan ko pang hintayin ang manager ko at iba pang kasama.

I was fixing my things in my bag when my phone rang at agad naman akong napangiti no'ng makita ang pangalan ni Trevor sa screen.

"Hi, Trev!" I greeted.

"Just arrived here, grabe jetlag!" Reklamo niya na ikinatawa ko.

Trevor is a friend of mine. He's also one of the models of Le Vrai. Trevor was one of the first people I knew when I arrived in the US, at dahil half-Filipino siya ay madali kaming nagkasundo. And now he's also in the Philippines for a project.

"Just rest. Let's just meet later, okay?"

"Right, I should rest. Love you, baby Lia."

Napangiwi ako dahil sa narinig. Trevor is a playful guy at kahit na inis na inis ako sa mga pinangsasabi at tawag niya sa akin ay lagi pa rin niya akong tinatawag na gano'n, mainly para mang-asar lang.

"Yeah, right. Bye, baby Trevy." Ganti ko bago ibaba ang tawag.

"Meeting is already dismissed, you can now all leave the room." Muntik na akong mapatalon dahil sa pagdagundong ng boses niya.

What the hell? Bakit ba siya nanggugulat? Bigla-biglang nagsasalita!

Medyo asar akong napatingin kay Kaleb na ngayon ay seryosong nakatingin sa laptop niya.

Problema niya?

Pati tuloy ang ibang mga tao sa room ay nagulat at napatingin sa kanya. Ang mga kasama naman niya ay agad-agad nang lumabas.

Ah, baka ayaw niyang nandito pa kami. Okay, aalis na ako. Baka naaasiwa siya eh.

I stood and was already about to leave with my manager, when he suddenly spoke that made my knees tremble.

"Lia."

Kahit na medyo nag-aalangan ay tumingin ako sa kanya dahil baka may sasabihin siyang importante.

He looked so serious when I looked at him, at muntik ko nang isipin na may sasabihin siyang hindi maganda. But he suddenly looked away...

"It's nice to see you again, Elliana Grazella." He muttered.