While they were training that morning, Mikey kept looking for a opportunity to ask Master Splinter about what he had seen. He didn't want to ask him outside of training because that might mean he'd bother him and he didn't want Splinter mad or annoyed with him as well. Seeing as there was no opportunity to ask him while they were sparring, Mikey decided to do it before they started meditation. Sure, the others would be there too which he didn't like but if he could just ask it vaguely enough they wouldn't know what he meant right?

Mikey bowed after sparring with Raph and sat down with the others to receive instructions for their meditation. The atmosphere was a bit tense. Probably because he hadn't made any jokes or pulled any pranks yet, and his brothers noticed. He just really wasn't in the mood to joke around. He had been lying so much lately and honestly, he didn't know how to feel about his brothers anymore. Of course he loved them, but he couldn't help but be a bit wary about them. It was like he was unconsciously expecting to have something hurtful thrown at him again. Mikey silently watched as his sensei sat down, and explained what they were doing this time.

Mikey waited anxiously for a moment to jump in and ask his questions. How was he even supposed to ask something like this? 'Hey, have you even been able to go somewhere with a weird glowing thing that used to make you happy and then it suddenly got dark and made you depre-' Mikey stopped his thoughts there being a bit surprised. He wasn't depressed right? He was just feeling down because he got put off the team. Because he let that happen since he always messes up on everythi- 'Nope! Don't think that way Mikey, that's silly.' He scolded himself frowning a little.

He snapped out of his thoughts to see Raph staring at him from the corner of his eye with an expression that could be described as irritated and confused, and maybe even a little bit worried but Mikey didn't catch that. He decided to act like he didn't notice Raph staring at him and focus on what Splinter was saying again.

"-and then we can train our minds to be in a state of consciousness in which we can find it's contents while-"

"Uhm... Sensei?" Mikey suddenly interrupted. Normally interrupting Master Splinter while he was talking was something everyone tried to avoid, and Mikey chuckled awkwardly when Splinter shifted his stern gaze to him.

"There's something I've been meaning to ask for a while now..." Mikey started. By now Leo, Donnie and Raph had shifted their attention to him as well, and Raph had a feeling it had to do with how Mikey acted before.

"Well then Michelangelo, if it is so important that you felt the need to interrupt me, I hope it's something serious."

"Yeah... It is! It's just that..." Mikey began. "I don't know how to ask it..." Mikey said frowning a little while looking down a bit. His Sensei waited for his son to continue. The others were also curious what he wanted to ask about. Mikey eas actually still a bit wary about his brothers. Of course he loved them, but you don't just forget it when someone stabs you in the back or at least does something that feels like that. Mikey decided it was probably best if he asked about it in general.

"So... I read this thing a while ago-"

"Ha! You and reading? Now that's something new." Raph Interrupted him, but quickly shut up after receiving a look from his Sensei and Mikey hid how he almost flinched at the comment. He hesitated before he continued again.

"It was about that meditation thing we did a while ago. A read about this sort of second world you could go to, and this orb that turned... dark. But it used to glow really bright and..." Mikey considered if he could add more details or if he would be to obvious then. He took a breath and looked up at his Sensei again.

"What is that? What is that world they're visiting and what is that orb thing?" He asked. His brothers were quite surprised by the somehow deep sounding question, and they too were waiting for a response from their Sensei. After having thought for a minute Master Splinter spoke up again.

"I believe what you have described is ones inner mind, my son." He answered. Mikey couldn't help but show a bit of surprise on his face. Inner mind? Then that world is just in his mind? Then what about the orb there? It was as if his Sensei heard his thoughts because he decided to continue right as Mikey thought it.

"The orb, I believe you called it, is a very special thing Michelangelo. You could see it as a soul." Master Splinter explained. Mikey looked confused and awkward since he had no idea what that meant. Donnie noticed and decided to jump in.

"A soul, is believed to be something that makes us us and everyone has one. It's supposed to be the thing that makes us living, and without it we'll die. It represents our wellbeing as well." Donnie explained to his little brother. Mikey nodded a little before looking down again, feeling stupid for not knowing something obvious like that. He then couldn't help but frown a little and scolded himself in his mind again. His thoughts had been so self berating lately it really got his mood down. And with him being kicked out the team and the orb going dark... Mikey replayed what he had just heard about the orb- no, soul? And his... inner mind, before he realized something Donnie had said.

"W-wait..." Mikey began getting the attention of the others who were all talking a bit. "What did you just say? Our soul represents our well being..?" Mikey asked hiding his concern and anxiousness. Donnie looked at him a bit skeptical, since Mikey was never really the person to dig into stuff and he hadn't even told them why he wanted to know all this information.

"Yeah... Like I said Mikey, if your soul is doing fine it basically means you're doing fine as well. I don't think it has to do with your normal health though, it's mainly about your mental health and mind." Donnie said while thinking about it. Raph scoffed a bit at all this spiritual talk and decided to speak up before Donnie had the chance to.

"So, why are we all talking about this spiritual mind stuff again? Like I'd get if Leo wanted to know something for his meditation obsession, but why do you wanna know?" Raph asked Mikey receiving a little glare from Leo at which Raph rolled his eyes.

"Like I said, I read this thing about it and I just wanted to know since I didn't understand it." Mikey quickly explained once more. He just hoped no one noticed that he was lying.

Everyone had different thoughts after that. Donnie and Leo fell for Mikey's lie, but that didn't mean they weren't questioning Mikey's strange behavior lately. They knew something was off and sure, they knew he would react a bit to being put off the team but Mikey had just become a bit distant. Leo decided he would meditate on it later, while Donnie decided to observe his only little brother a bit closer from now on. Raph, he knew Mikey wasn't being totally honest. He knew as well that something was off, and it honestly pissed him off that he didn't know what it was Mikey was lying about.

Mikey however, was trying to decide what to do next. What did it mean when half of your soul went dark? Was it something really bad or was it just something everyone had? Mikey was never a really good thinker, but being in the dojo with his brothers and sensei did not help. He couldn't show any of his expressions on his face. He didn't want them to see how he was thinking about everything he had just heard and what it meant. It was just so difficult to let everything sink in. That thing was his soul? But then... Why was turning dark like that?

He had so many questions and he really wanted an answer. He glanced up to see everyone chatting again. It kind of hurt him to see everyone like that. He isn't in the team anymore and they don't even seem to mind... Was he really that unnecessary to the team? Mikey didn't even know if it mattered to them at all. He would have asked them more questions but decided against it. Somehow, he just didn't have the trust and comfort in talking to his brothers like he used to. He was going to figure it out himself. It had really scarred him to be put off the team like that. Then again, he wondered if his brothers would notice that. Once again, his thoughts turned sad like that. But this time...

He couldn't stop it.

IM NOT DEAD!

School has been brutal these past weeks, BUT it's over... FOR NOW, even so I'll be updating faster in the future. Mikey now finally knows what the orb is. His trust in his brothers is going down though. So what will Mikey do about it?

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