Yeonjun's POV:

 Haneul was sitting there quietly, with her back resting against the headbord and her arms wrapped around her legs. As soon as I entered the room once again, she looked up and our eyes met. I handed her a cup of tea, and a slight smile formed on her lips.

"Careful, it's hot" I said, sitting on the bed in front of her. 

She held the cup with both hands, blowing on it gently before taking a sip.

"Thank you" She said, still with her lips against the edge of the cup. I nodded, crossing my legs and sighing.

"Do you feel better now? That should help anyways" 

A bitter smile appeared on her lips this time. She placed the cup on her thigh, avoiding eye contact with me.

"I don't even know how to answer to that question" She confessed, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I-I mean..." I stuttered. She finally locked eyes with me and smiled.

"It's okay" She muttered "If you meant the panic attack, yeah, I'm better now... But the constant feeling of emptiness doesn't go away"

I pressed my lips together and nodded, understanding her feelings.

"I know... It's going to be like that for a while"

She kept quiet for a moment, taking another sip from her cup. She seemed to be deep in thoughts, but that was understandable.

"I thought we would get married someday, you know?" She finally spoke. I looked at her, waiting to hear what she needed to say "I guess I had too many dreams. Moving together, be with him while he achieved his dreams, and maybe have kids" She added.

Her words reminded me of that conversation Rocky, Rowoon and I had at his home. She never mentioned anything about the schoolarship, and that made me wonder if he was able to tell her. I got distracted by my curiosity and diverted my gaze to somewhere else, but she noticed.

"Yeonjun? Are you okay?" She asked, bringing me back to earth. I looked at her again, shaking my head and sighing.

"Yeah, I was just... Thinking"

She frowned, looking confused.

"About? I mean, If you want to tell me"

In that moment, doubts fell heavily over me. I didn't know if telling her would be the right thing to do, especially when her wounds were so fresh. However, I knew if I lied to her, she wouldn't buy it.

"I... I don't know if it's the right moment to talk about it"

She tilted her head.

"Talk about what?" She asked. I looked down, but she leaned forward searching for my eyes. "What's wrong? Is it about Rocky?"

"Uh, yeah"

Her expression went totally blank. She looked at me dead in the eye and I knew I had to tell her.

"What is it? Please, just tell me whatever it is"

I scratched the back of my neck nervously, letting out a breath.

"I don't want you to feel worse"

She laughed ironically.

"Yeonjun, I highly doubt something can be worse than losing him" She firmly said. Her pleading eyes made my heart ache even though she was trying to look tough "Please"

I sighed.

"Did he tell you about the schoolarship?"

Her eyes widened, and I was sure her hear sank to her stomach, because so did mine.

"What schoolarship? What are you talking about?"

I ran my hand down my face, frustrated.

"Okay... Listen" I said, straightening my posture "He applied for a dance academy last year, and before your anniversary he told Rowoon and I that he got accepted"

Her eyes were glossy. I knew that would hurt her.

"What?" She whispered.

"It was one of the best dance academies in America. He didn't think he would be accepted, so when he knew it, he told us how scared he was of telling you"

"But... Why would he feel scared?"

"Because he didn't know what to do" I explained. "He wanted to go, but didn't want to leave you, indeed, he refused to go without you. He even thought about asking you to marry him so he could take you with him"

Tears started streaming down her face, but her expression kept totally blank. I felt terrible for telling her something that he should've said to her.

"Did you know everything all this time?" She finally asked, glaring at me with a painful gaze.

I shook my head.

"I didn't know he had applied to that school. He didn't tell anyone. And when he told us, I couldn't say anything because he was going to tell you himself"

She placed the cup on top of her nightstand before she covered her face with both of her hands. I could hear soft muffled sniffles, then confirmed she was crying when she moved her hands away.

"I didn't know, I had no idea" She said, her voice cracking "I would've been so happy for him" She added, her voice followed by sobs "I would've rather let him go and leave me behind than him dying being scared to tell me something so important for him"

My heart broke. I knew she would support him no matter what, and it was incredibly tragic that she had to face the situation when she couldn't let him know how happy she would've been for him.

I grabbed her hand and squeezed it, letting her know I was there for her. I hoped that Minhyuk would smile at how good she was to him, wherever he was.

"I'm sure he knows now..." I whispered. She held my hand in return, crying silently.

"What else can you tell me?" 

I looked at her confused.

"What?"

"About him. His past, things I probably don't know. Anything"

I smiled sympathethically.

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

She nodded.

"Yes... Please"

I sighed.

"Okay... Do you know about his ex?" She shook her head "He dated a girl before you guys met. He was really in love with her, but she was really mean to him"

"Why? What did she do to him?"

"Well... He always wanted to impress her, but that wouldn't do. Whenever Rocky practiced or even performed in front of her, she would never praise him. Indeed, it was the opposite. She often compared him to other dancers, and told him that she was disappointed of not being able to date the best dancer"

She looked disgusted, shaking her head.

"That's awful, what the hell? Rocky was incredible... So amazing, he danced with so much passion, with so much grace"

I nodded.

"I know... We all knew that... And we told him, but he only believed her" I sighed "He kept overworking himself, dancing non stop, barely sleeping, barely eating. All he wanted to do was dance for hours. He was self-conscious since he was younger, but she was the reason it got even worse"

"And what happened with them?"

"Well..." I sighed "She ended up cheating on him with other dancer. He was devastated, and since that day he never thought he would ever be good enough"

She dried her tears with the sleeve of the hoodie she was wearing. Her eyes were already puffy and irritated.

"How could someone make something like that to him?" She cried "I can't believe someone would hurt him that way... He deserved so much, he was an angel"

I smiled.

"And he got it" I responded. She looked at me again "He got what he deserved the day he met you. I remember how flustered he was"

"Really?"

I nodded.

"I remember him entering the cafeteria talking about a really pretty girl that he had caught stalking him" She chuckled, with new tears falling "At first I thought he was joking, but then we saw you. He didn't understand your sudden interest, but he looked radiant"

"Radiant?" She chuckled.

"Yeah" I smiled "When he got to know you, he was so scared of asking you out. I tried to tell him that he should just be straightforward, but he thought somehow you would reject him"

"That was impossible" She assured "I kept wondering if he didn't like me, because we never moved forward"

I chuckled.

"I had to tell him I'd ask you out instead if he didn't ask you"

Haneul looked at me in disbelief, then laughed.

"That was a dirty move"

I shrugged, smiling.

"It worked, though"

"I'm glad it did" She smiled, wiping her tears away "He was really special"

"You made him the happiest" I smiled "I will always thank you for that. He got out of that hole he was stuck in because of you. He totally changed for good when you guys got together"

"He did the same with me" She confessed "After I moved here alone, I was rebellious. I was upset all the time, I felt alone and neglected" She sighed "But when I met him, I just wanted to be good"

"And what did you parents say?"

She smiled, looking at her hands.

"They adored him" She admitted "My mom wasn't sure about it, my parents didn't want me to date because I was too young, but after they saw the possitive effect he had on me, they basically adopted him. They considered Rocky their other child" She smiled "It was so embarrassing the first times he visited with my parents there. My mom would always want to show him old naked baby pictures of me, or videotapes. Rocky used to be really shy around them, he was always giggling and making fun of my chubby body"

We both chuckled at the story. I could perfectly picture Rocky in that situation. He adored everything about Haneul, and even though their relationship wasn't perfect, they were real with each other.

"Did you see his own baby pictures?" I asked, she nodded chuckling "I always looked at their family album and made fun of him" I confessed "Especially in that picture where he was dressed as a shrimp"

We both laughed.

"I know, that was the best costume" She agreed, then silence filled the room for a moment "I don't know if I will ever be able to love someone else"

"I'm sure you will love again... When the time comes, when you heal"

She shook her head.

"I don't really want to love anyone" She said "I can't, and I'm sure no one could ever love me like he did"

I smiled bitterly.

"Don't say that... Anyone could love you. He did, and you made him happy, why can't that happen again?"

"Because I won't be able to love them the way I loved him, so they won't be happy"

I lifted my hand and patted her head.

"You don't have to stop loving Rocky" I whispered "He will always live inside your heart, but you will be able to open up your heart to someone again... Someday"

She stared at me with a pained expression.

"What if I can't move on? What if I stay in the dark forever?"

"You're strong, Haneul... You will heal, no matter how long it takes"

She sighed.

"Yeonjun..."

"Yeah?"

"Please don't hate me if I treat you bad tomorrow. You're good, really, but I just feel like..."

I smiled.

"I won't hate you" I assured "I already told you, if that soothes the pain, I will understand. But just know that I will always be one call away"