*Y'all I finished outlining this story and I was a fool . . . Because there's 24 chapters left not 15-20. WHOOPS, THE CLOWNERY IS REAL. There was a lot I needed to tie up before ending this series, but I'm so happy it's outlined and I know exactly where this book is headed! I wasn't sure how I wanted to end it, but now I know. And I know for a fact y'all will probably cry❤️*

Ruth packed an overnight bag of toiletry necessities, a few outfits, and an embarrassing pair of SpongeBob pajamas. Raffo spent his time helping roll and pack whatever she tossed to him and ordered the Lyft ride after zipping up her duffel bag. She went to pick it up, but Raffo easily intercepted and smoothly slid his shoulder under the strap. Opening her mouth to protest, he swooped in with a hearty kiss, stopping her from saying anything more.

Ruth went to wrap an arm around his neck, moldering her body against his, when he suddenly parted from her. A teasing gleam glowed in his mesmerizing eyes as he lightly patted her hip and ran his tongue over his lips.

"Ride's here," he winked, running his knuckle over her flushed cheek.

She pouted. "Asshole."

Raffo only smiled. He moved his arm so he could grab her hand and tugged them to the door.

The Lyft ride over to Raffo's apartment took no longer than ten minutes. Their driver wasn't a very talkative guy, which was perfectly fine as Raffo and her gazed out the window thoughtfully, and caught the sweet transition of Fall in Oklahoma. Lights, crisp leaves, and bundled sweaters.

Much to Ruth's delight, Raffo's place was located in a fancy building that couldn't have been built more than five years ago, with seven stories and a doorman out front. As soon as the driver pulled to a stop in front of the doors, Ruth opened the door excitedly and bounded out, ignoring Raffo's protest to wait.

She walked right up to the front doors and was greeted by the middle-age man with greying hair and kind hazel eyes. "Hi!" she chirped, her smile wide.

"Evening, ma'am," he greeted back, amused.

"Hey Hodge," Raffo acknowledged kindly, reaching out to grip Ruth's hand in his. "This is Ruth. Ruth, this is Hodge."

Hodge opened the door for them both and bowed his head at her. "It's wonderful to meet you, Ruth."

"You too, Hodge!" She didn't say it aloud, but she wanted so badly to say his name reminded her of Criminal Minds. But she kept that one to herself, as she dragged Raffo through the golden doors behind her and stepped into a lobby.

Everything inside reminded her of a typical San Francisco apartment building. Gold trim, cream furniture, a large front desk with a handsome security guard tucked behind the table, and fake plants pushed into every corner of the room. He barely looked up from the computer when they stepped in and tossed his hand in a half-hearted wave towards them. Ruth rose an eyebrow to Raffo, who threw a wave back, and led them over to an elevator.

Once they stepped inside, Ruth finally spoke. "Okay, wow."

He smiled and the action alone rendered her speechless. "You like it?"

She nodded furiously. "Yes! It literally looks like someone stole an entire building from San Francisco and put it in Oklahoma."

"I knew you'd love it," he replied, smugly.

Ruth playfully rolled her eyes, and the elevator alerted them they had arrived to the sixth floor. He fixed his grip on her hand and led the way to his apartment. Even the walls almost smelled like fresh paint and all the doors had an in added shine to their olive green coat. She held her breath as he slowed down to number 610 and grabbed his keys out of his pocket. Putting the key in the lock, he gave it a twist and then nudged it open.

As soon as he flickered on the light and they stepped through the threshold, Ruth was amazed.

A kitchen with marble counters, an alabaster table that seats four, a black couch, and a wide-screen greeted her first. Her shoes clacked against hardwood, mahogany floors as she twirled in the rustic room surrounding her. Indigenous paintings littered the walls alongside photos of his family and an arrow stretched out behind the widescreen TV that stood on a white entertainment stand.

Raffo sat on one of his bar stools as he allowed her to eagerly explore the two-bedroom apartment. The bedrooms were a little plain, but she hadn't expected much other than what was there. In the guest bedroom, the comforter set was white and there was a few electronic and art items his sisters left over in a pile. In the master bedroom, it seemed more like Raffo, and it calmed any of her exciting nerves. He had his black comforter set, a closet full of clothes, and an elegant dresser along the side in the master bedroom. He had another TV hanging on his wall across from his bed, but it was obviously a few inches smaller than the one in his living room, and a connecting master bathroom that was larger than she thought it was going to be. The mix of masculine vibes alongside the occasionally softness in the entire apartment was perfect.

She almost left the room when the sight of something on his bedside table captured her curious eye. Furrowing her eyebrows, she stepped closer to it until she could make out the picture, causing her eyes to widen. She shakily picked it up and held it between trembling fingers.

Situated snuggly in a frame, with a heart engraved elegantly at the lower corner, was a photo of a brown-skinned girl holding a basketball to her hip as her long curls blanked her shoulders. The smile stretched across her beautiful flushed cheeks was brilliant and easily rivaled the sun's gleam behind her. The secrets whispered in her seductive eyes only enhanced her obvious beauty that drew you further into the photograph. Her eyes blurred.

Fingertips brushed against her cheek, drawing her back to the present. She blinked and looked up at Raffo who watched her with concern, his eyebrows furrowed. When his eyes fell on the photograph of her, he swallowed thickly.

"I'm sorry," she whispered hoarsely. "I didn't mean to—to snoop around. I just—I can't believe you really cared for me after all this time. And I . . ."

I had to hate you to even try to move on. Not even trying to know the truth.

Raffo was exactly like Snape, and she had no idea how much it had hurt him to give her up.

"After all this time?"

"Always."

Ruth looked away, ashamed. She didn't understand why they got dealt such a shitty hand. It wasn't fair. She shouldn't have to feel misplaced; like she was an absent parent trying to reconnect into her kid's life. It wasn't the best analogy, but that's how she felt. How would she fit in his life now that he was established? When she missed everything because she never fought for the truth, all while he was still loving her.

The photo used to be his screensaver, and if she had to guess (or hope), he still probably had her as such.

Raffo was patient with her and wrapped a careful hand around her wet cheek.

"Ruth," he started, his voice soft with warmth and pain. "I never once stopped caring about you, and I never once held you going to New York against you. I'd always hoped you'd come back eventually, but I knew that was never certain. You can't keep blaming yourself for the years we didn't have each other, because maybe a lot of good came out of that. We both got to work on our lives, establish our careers, and mature into who we are right now."

Ruth's heart opened at his words, but her mind was still trying to find another avenue to cope with all she'd learned.

"And maybe . . . I don't know. Maybe this is exactly where we should be," he continued, helping her place the picture down first before wrapping her up in his arms. "Maybe we were meant to be apart for a little while. And now that we're together again, this could be the Creator giving us a second chance. And how often do second chances happen?"

"Not very often," Ruth admitted, her voice muffled against his broad chest.

"Exactly. I think we've been looking at it all wrong. If we're supposed to move forward from it, we can't keep looking at it the way we have been, otherwise we'll forever be stuck in a negative mindset. We don't have to forgive Emily, but I think we should take a step forward instead of another one back."

Ruth nodded against his shirt, curling her fingers into them. "Okay. You're right."

Raffo moved some of her curls behind her ear and nodded to his sacred space with hope in his eye. "What'd you think about the apartment?"

Ruth grinned, sniffling her tears away. "I love it. It feels very homelike," she confessed.

Satisfied, he brushed his lips against her temple. "Perfect."

*****

After they departed from one another, they finally moved to grab a few snacks from his clear pantry and changed into something more comfortable. Ruth into her SpongeBob pajamas and Raffo in a casual pair of sweats and a tight t-shirt.

She subconsciously bit her lip at the sight of his molded muscles beneath the material, but the lust quickly dissipated with the howl of laughter emanating from his mouth as he fell back on the bed, chip bag in his hands. She followed his line of sight and looked down at her short SpongeBob shorts and matching long-sleeve. Her cheeks glowed with warmth.

"What?" she asked, innocently, looking back up at him.

"You're so cute," he chuckled, shaking his head. "But what the hell are you wearing?"

"Don't be mean! I think they're cute," she pouted. Raffo's eyes softened and he sat up, reaching for her when she reluctantly stayed planted where she was.

"Aww, come here baby. They're very cute," he promised, reaching out and dragging her body onto the bed beside him. He moved against the headboard and tucked her securely between his long legs as she leaned into him. As an apology, he passed her the remote. "Here, pick whatever you want."

She perked up at that. "Really? No complaints?"

"No complaints, aiukli."

She didn't need to be told three times. Before he could ask what she was deciding on, she already pulled up Netflix and pressed season three of The Flash. She faintly heard an 'oh no' but she happily ignored it and went back to where she had left off in New York.

"You're so behind," he groaned.

"No complaints, Raff," she reminded him, snagging a Lays chip.

Raffo shoved a chip in his mouth to prevent further comment. Snuggled together, they watched as many episodes as her body would allow her, which wasn't very many, and stopped after Iris told Barry he couldn't ignore the city just to save her. Ruth, with her hero complex, tiredly agreed with Iris. If she were her, she definitely wouldn't want other peoples lively hood snatched from them just because she could possibly die in the future.

Raffo, on the other hand, completely disagreed with Iris and openly sided with Barry. Ruth scoffed and twisted her upper body around with her arms crossed over her chest. They had just came back from brushing their teeth and stuffing Ruth's hair into a sleep bonnet, and Ruth still wasn't done with the conversation.

He rose both his eyebrows expectantly. "What?"

"You think saving one life is more important than saving millions?" she asked incredulously.

He snorted stubbornly. "That's hardly the comparison. Plunder was a robber, not a killer!"

"The sentiment was still there. Iris said "you can't stop protecting this city to save me", which implies Plunder and any future meta!"

"Fine. It doesn't matter to me either way because my answer still stands."

Ruth groaned and fell dramatically onto the bed beside him. "How can you say that?"

"I'll gladly let the world burn if it meant keeping you alive," he said, simply. "If I were Barry, and you were Iris, best believe there's gonna be more than a few robbers running around if it could change your future."

Ruth failed to hide her smile despite the yawn overtaking her lips. "You're terrible."

"I'm a selfish bastard. Sue me" he murmured dryly. He helped draw her body against his and tenderly kissed her temple. "Goodnight Ms. Superhero."

"Goodnight Selfish Bastard," she mumbled back, and he laughed loudly at that. She couldn't stop her own giggles from spilling out of her lips as the two of them cuddled closer and eventually gave into the exhaustion dancing at the edge of their subconscious.

*****