It was official.

Ruth Semple had officially missed Raffo Leflore.

And currently, she wasn't sorry about it. Not when they just spent the last hour dancing, laughing, and splashing around in the pool. His lingering touches, his expressive gaze that never wavered when he looked at her for too long was magic. A familiar magic that had been kept buried in the cracks of a broken heart. Magic that their ancestors had sprinkled on them long ago, when their names were carved out in the skies and faraway dreams imagined for their future.

She felt the magic as she laid out on the outdoor chaise beside him. Though their bodies were facing the sun, they turned their heads towards each other as if pulled by something invisible and magnetic, their gazes lazily clashing on a collision course. She knew they were gathering occasional attention from the group they came with, but not one of them seemed to care enough to interrupt them. If anything, they were curious. What could the two of them be talking about after so many years without a decent conversation? And what made Ruth change her mind enough to give Raffo the time of day?

Ruth didn't know the answer to that. It could have been his persistence in trying to talk to her while she did her best to block out her feelings and ignore him. It could have been the way he took care of her when she was drunk off her ass and almost fell into trouble with unwanted men. Hell, it could have even been Crystal flirting with him just because he was the most attractive out of all the guys. Either way, here they were, and Ruth had no intention of ending their moment in the sun earlier than she had to.

Ruth knew what she was doing was wrong. She felt it in her gut that what she was doing had to be breaking a million couple rules, but she couldn't stop it. She'd never . . . cheated, before. Raffo was always enough for her, and with Emily, she hadn't wanted another. Not even when Hannah and Jeremiah in Ruth's classes were showing interest in her. She hadn't wanted them, and only needed to be around Emily in any sexual or romantic sense. Not once in her life had she ever even considered being unfaithful to the person she was with.

But Raffo made her want to break all the rules. And she couldn't draw back the want for him anymore; not when her body craved it for years. The guilt was almost overwhelming, but her toxic greed found a way around it.

It's not like I'm kissing or sleeping with him, she'd think to herself. And when I leave Oklahoma . . . I'll be with her again. I'm still choosing to go back to her.

It was the right thing to do. She had a job, a home, and a life she had made with Emily. She had family in Oklahoma, of course, but she wasn't established there the way she was in New York.

Ruth didn't know the answer to anything. It was Monday's problem.

Instead, she hungrily locked herself in the moment. She knew watching Raffo take in the sun's warmth on his summer abs that glowed in mouthwatering grooves was a terrible idea. Especially when he had moved his chair closer to her so that he could lazily entwine his fingers through hers. He looked just as content as she felt, and when their skin met again, it didn't feel wrong. How could something that felt so good, be wrong for her?

Could anyone be angry when they embraced the wholeness that covered one's body from head to toe, inside and out? She'd heard all the sayings about first loves and their long-lasting effects. She'd read quotes about it and hell, she even went on Quora to read about first love losses and selfishly wondered if people ever Yo-Yo'd and came back to them later in life. It wasn't until Emily wanted more that she stopped reading the quotes. She stopped praying and wishing on stars to have Raffo back so the pain would stop. It was a vicious cycle, but there was something long-lasting about first love pain.

It was a strange pain that one would feel the effects of forever.

And now . . . now it was Yo-Yoing and a part of her soul wanted to scream 'HA!' to all the people on Quora who said it was a pipe dream. But they were right about one thing. Once your first love comes back in the picture, you question everything and you wonder if you should take a chance on it working out a second time, or stick with the person you know and were already settled with. Is your sanity worth taking a chance on when it came to fate?

But what if fate was too late? What if situations or people were already out of time? That thought . . . troubled her.

"What are you thinking about?" Raffo finally murmured, breaking her out of her confusing thoughts.

Ruth blinked at him. She honestly didn't know what to say to that, because the word 'everything' would have sufficed for her, but would have been nothing but perplexing to him. So, she settled with a truthful, and yet inconspicuous, "Time."

Though she only said that one word, recognition settled in his gaze and an empathetic partial smile graced his lips. She didn't have to say much at all, and he already got it. She supposed she shouldn't be surprised, but it had been awhile since someone had understood her how he did.

Emily would have taken her answer literally. She would have responded with, "Huh? You want the time? Is it getting late? Why are you thinking about time?"

But Raffo's was in understanding. "I swear it never feels like there's enough of it."

Ruth's sentiment exactly. She remembered precisely when time had sped up for her, beginning with high school graduation. She may have had a year off, but it was a year too quick. She had just finished the last four years of her childhood and they expected her to bounce back and know exactly what she wanted out of life? No, she wanted time to figure it out. But she was on her mother's hourglass time and she had to make a decision.

Then time moved again, multiplying by three when her grandfather died before her big move to be with him again. Time hadn't waited for her on that one, and it killed her inside for months. Move forward a year, and Ruth met the first person she ever loved. Their time together was a blink of an eye. They met, they had an amazing middle, and then an abrupt ending. She left, and then a few years later, after finally committing to Emily, she didn't have enough time to be with her before things began getting complicated with Raffo again. Not to mention her uncle's health was fading, and suddenly she was out of time once again. Time robbed her repeatedly, speeding away into a future she couldn't grasp.

Life was unpredictable. She knew that better than anyone. But damn it, she just wanted time.

"Never," she whispered, agreeing with him.

Raffo's grip on her hand became firmer, and she looked up from the pool's surface to look back at him, not even realizing she had looked away. He moved from his chaise to kneel before her. Alarmed, she went to sit up too, but he shook his head and told her she was fine. She laid back down, but turned her body towards him now with her other hand gripped in his as well.

"Time has never been on our side, Ruth," he started, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. "Not with our family losses, not with our short time together three-and-a-half years ago, and not in the time we were apart . . . Although, I will say, time definitely has her favorites," he winked, smiling crookedly as his gaze unashamedly trailed down the soft curves of her body.

Ruth playfully rolled her eyes, her cheeks warming at the compliment. If time had any favorites, Raffo would have definitely made her list. He was beyond the simple definition of beautiful, as just the sight of him made the earth turn much too fast. Not to mention talking to Raffo made him even more out of this world.

Raffo's pretty brown eyes captured hers again, and his features softened. It made her stomach ache.

"But . . . I don't think it should be measurable. We only measure time because the human urge to have a construct has made it so. But time can be an eternity if we allow it to be," he pointed out, squeezing her fingers. "And if we think about it that way, these small moments aren't us running out of time. Time can be infinite. If time starts, then eternity ends. So, why can't we make time everlasting?"

She shivered, his words prickling at her skin and unlocking thoughts that teetered on the edge of hope.

"Because nothing lasts forever," she admitted. She didn't believe that completely, but it was an answer to his hypothetical question.

Raffo shook his head, his hair spilling into his face. "That's not true. You didn't want to hear what I wanted to tell you earlier in the pool, but I'm going to say it now. This right here, Ruth?"

He drew her hands up to his bare chest. Ruth's eyes widened as her fingers fanned out and felt the fast pump of his heart beneath her warm skin that only quickened the longer she stared at him. It moved as fast as hers did in that moment and she searched his face, holding her breath.

"This feeling I feel for you, and the way my heart beats for you because of it, has never gone away. Not in the three years I should have at least tried to get over you, not in the time you avoided me, and it won't change ever. This love for you will never go away. Not in the next three years or the next five, hell not even fucking eternity. This is going to last forever, baby," Raffo promised, drawing one of her hands up to his lips so he could press a kiss to her fingertips. She sighed softly at the old, endearing name. "And when we leave this hotel, I'm telling you everything. I'm not letting you leave me in Oklahoma without you knowing what happened."

Ruth's gaze blurred, her nose burning as she sniffed. She was an utter fool.

A fool for letting him draw her back into his intoxicating words that always made her richer than any queen. She was Raffo's fool, and her heart squeezed at words it shouldn't have. Her tears shouldn't have been wiped by the man who used to put them there after she left, but there she was. And she let him.

Because she was an utter fool.

Ruth allowed him to draw her into the comfort of his embrace. He moved onto the chaise so she could push her wet cheek against his chest, her arms wrapping around his torso tightly. His lips pressed soundlessly to her temple as he dove his fingers into her curls, holding her to him as tightly as he could without hurting her. There was no intention of either of them letting the other go in their personal infinity.

Once again, Raffo put the tears in her eyes. But he brought the stars with him that time, and introduced her to the idea of his eternity.

And his eternity was more than enough.

*****