My dearest Hazel...

By now you are a young woman, full of dreams and your heart still searching, for more to recieve. I do hope that by the time you read this letter, every bit of desire I had for your life, has come to pass.

I hope that you are happy and in love. I hope that you are finally at that point in your life, where you know that your decisions matter, your voice matters.
I hope that finally you and Roman have realised that you two, are soulmates.

Maybe it's my wishful thinking but I see something there, something that is rare. As young as you two are, I see it and you two ending up together makes total sense, if you know what I mean.

I hope that in whatever life has thrown at you, in every way, you must know that you will breathrough each hurdle that comes your way.

I want you to know that it's okay to trust people, it's okay to break ties to what's negative upon your life, you don't need to remain in such positions that tie you down, just because you are afraid of hurting the next person. You care and you care alot, there is no fault in that, but never allow anyone to make you feel like, you have lost your voice.

You are strong and are beautiful, inside out. Remember to keep on shining and to stay grounded. Be what you want to be, see the things you've wished to see and enjoy your years.

Make moments count and know that I love you. I love you with all my heart and to me, you are my sunshine, my miracle and my blessing. You are everything in a daughter, I prayed upon to God for.

Your father and I are so proud of you.

I love you.

Mom.....❤💖❤

An easy smile touches my lips as I think about the letter, I have just read, a letter from my mom. Dad gave it to me not so long ago and I have made sure, to keep it safe eversince. Tonight is New Years Eve and I am a lady in red, for the New Years Eve party. The O'Connors are hosting it and some very important people, most that I have never met, will be present tonight.

These are not the type of parties I am used to, but because of the family, insisting that I be part of tonight, I just couldn't refuse. I didn't want anything fancy but something that would make a statement, and by the look I am going with tonight, I know that I definetly did right.

It's a simple red gown with a complimentery back section, that has its own unique touch. I love how it is simple in the front while at the back, there is something to appreciate. I had my hair styled to flow on one side and when it came to make- up wise, someone did it for me.

Roman made sure that I lack nothing in any department, wanting me to be comfortable. He was so fussy and was demanding that he be present, but I kicked him out. He would distract me and we would be late for the party. This I am sure of.

Before I can do anything, the door opens and he peeks his head in, he looks around until he finds me. I watch from the mirror as he enters, closing the door behind him before he approaches me. With a nervous smile, I turn around to face him, silently waiting for him to say something.

My smile wavers abit when he doesn't say anything but simply walks around me.

Does he not like the dress?

When he comes back around to face me again, yet again he doesn't say anything but just stares at me.

" Why are you just staring, say something?" I say anxiously, wanting him to say something already.

The silence is killing me.

" Can't I revel in your beauty?" He says.

I shyly look down, breaking eye contact as a blush warms my cheeks.

"No, no Hazel Grace, don't look away from me." He says, tilting my chin up and our eyes meet. " You are breathtaking." He whispers, looking at me as if he has been sucked into some form of trance.

" Roman -"

" I love you." He cuts me off.

I smile at him. Each time he says it to me, it feels like the first time. Those words coming from his lips do something to me each time. I could never get enough of hearing them.

" So, are you just going to spend the whole night gawking ?" I tease him.

" Yes."

I chuckle at his answer and he smirks at me.

" Roman, we're going to be late." I remind him.

" I don't care."

" You should, it's an important night."

" It's our night and in my eyes, you are most important." He leans forward, his intention of kissing me being clear but I hold out my hand, stopping him.

" Roman, we're really going to be late. Lets go."

" Okay but first, tell me something. Are you okay about tonight?"

I nod. " Hmm, this is about you and a step into your future. Ofcourse I would be -"

" No baby, this is about our future. What I do from now on is about our lives and our future."

" Roman, you are always taking care of me. You always think of me and my needs and I love you for that, but I don't want this to be a reason that you place yourself last. I never want you to forget your own desires and dreams. I don't want you to hate me later on because you felt obligated to do something, just to prove that you can take care of me. You already do so much for me and I -"

" Hazel, hey hey. Calm down baby." He cuts me off, making me sigh.

" First of all, I don't feel any obligation or any pressure, to prove how capable I am to take care of you. I am doing this on my own free will and this is part of my desire and goal, for my future. To make something of my life and to be my own man, my life to be filled with so much purpose..... And yes, it's true that I think about you, I mean why not.

You're the girl of my dreams, you are the love of my life and you make life worth living. I want to take care of you. I love loving you and I love you. I have every right to think and dream about you, you are my baby."

" And you are my baby. " I respond.

" But you wont kiss your baby." He pouts, making me chuckle.

I watch him glance to my lips but I gesture to my face, reminding him of my make-up.

He sighs. " Fine, but if you wont give me what I want now, I'll just have to hold your hand the whole night."

" That's impossible and you know it."

" Is it?" He raises his brow.

" Be fair on my feet Roman, I can only last for so long and this dress -"

" I'll just have to carry you then." He says stubbornly.

" Yeah, I'd like to see you try." I scoff, walking past him.

" You know I can do it. Infact, let me do it right now."

"Don't you dare." I warn him as I head over to take my clutch bag, from the bed.

I gasp in surprise when arms wrap around me and he pulls me into his chest. " I don't think you are being fair to me baby. You are basically a dream to admire and there will be a lot of eyes. I don't think I'm comfortable with that. I should be with you. "

I smile, turning around in his arms and facing him.

" Roman." I touch his face." Don't you know that I feel you with me, even if you are not next to me. You are a part of me and because of that, I know that I will never be alone." I say.

He takes my hand from his face, bringing it to his lips, where he lingers the touch of his kiss, on my skin. " I've always said it haven't I?"

" What?"

" That you and I are soulmates."

My heart flips at the sound of his words and his heart is reflecting in his eyes. He always knows what to say just to make me feel weak to my knees.

" Maybe you should tell every guy who dares come near me." I suggest with a grin.

" I should, shouldn't I?" He grins right back.

" Okay Mr O'Connor, lets go shall we?" He nods.

We both finally leave the hotel room, heading down to where the party is held. When we arrive there, we immediately attract attention.

As much as we are celebrating all of us approaching a new year, tonight is also a big night for both Roman and Nick, a father will officially introduce his son to the world. It's a chance for Roman to meet important people as he will venture into business.

When Roman first brought this up, this being a time when we were discussing our future and stuff, I asked him if he was sure about this, if this is what he was truly sure to pursue and when he said yes, with certainty in his eyes, I knew that I would support him.

He wants to make a name for himself and I will support him in every step, as long as he wants to do something and it makes him both happy and proud, to accomplish something, I am all for it. His happiness and dreams are important to me.

As for me, well, I still have quite a bit to figure out.

Throughout the night, I watch Roman interract with people and how confident and sure of himself, he looks. He looks handsome and just so incontrol, he masks his face into a blank expression, not wanting anyone to know what he is thinking. I feel proud and in awe as I watch him.

Throughout the night, 2 to 5 minutes doesn't pass without him glancing my way or his eyes searching for me. Each time his eyes find me, his eyes smile at me. I seem to capture his attention longer, that the person who he is in conversation with, takes notice.

Thank God that Melissa is with me, she keeping me company and ofcourse, Rosy too. I spend most of the time that Roman is busy, with them. It was an emotional moment for me when Nick introduced Roman, a tear slipped out for sure.

As the night rolls away and at some point, I visit the bathroom, needing a breather. I mean these kinds of parties are not my type of scene but I'm willing to learn and adjust, for the sake of Roman. I'll learn along with him but I make a promise to mysef, to not lose myself but just be me.

When I return to the party, on my way to our table, a lady in her mid 40's and who looks so gorgeous and wealthy, approaches me, stopping me in my tracks.

" Aah, Hazel right?....Or should I say young Mrs O'Connor."

" Excuse me?" I ask, frowning in confusion.

" Well that's what the young O'Connor has been telling us." She gestures to where Roman is standing, with his father and a few other people. " He is quite a charming young man with a sharp mind. There is something special about him."

My heart swells with pride when I hear these words.

" And I must say, he might be young but there is so much honesty, in an area most men I've come across have slipped from, the area of love. That young man truly adores you." Her words fall short from my hearing, when once again, I see Roman glancing around, his eyes searching, until they land on me.

A blush warms my cheeks when he just stares at me and seems to completely, forget about the people around him.

"See what I mean?" I look away from Roman to the lady, who winks at me before she walks away.

Glancing back at Roman, I notice him whisper something in Nick's ear before he comes my way.

" You know, I didn't call you over." I say, teasing him.

" Oh but you did, you actually gave me a sign. "

" What sign?" I ask amused.

" That's for me to know." He shrugs.

I give him a ' really' look.

" You remember the first day of school, in the auditorium?"

" Yeah."

" I said the same thing."

" Hmm and again, what may this sign be?"

His fingers tilt my face up, so we stare into each others eyes." You glance my way and our eyes meet. You let the contact linger and not because you mean to, but because you can't help it. We get lost into each others eyes, you speak to me without words and it's then, the sense of a sign sparks."

He speaks and I listen, his words are so hypnotic that they place me in a trance, where all I do is look into his eyes and fall weak under his gaze.

" Now you are near me." I say, running my fingers through his hair. " I am standing right infront you. I am looking right into your eyes, now you tell me. What are my eyes saying now?"

" What more could they say, then the words that touch my heart. These beautiful, innocent and mesmerising eyes of yours express love, the kind that can only be reserved for me, meant for me."

" I love you." The words slip from my lips before I can even think about it.

" And the next thing they'll tell me, is that you want to kiss me so bad."

I let out a laugh, shaking my head.

" Nice try O'Connor, but no. Now, what is this I hear about you telling people , that I am your wife ?"

" And who started this game?"

" Hey, I was at a tight spot, a helpless one. Twice might I add." I say, holding up my fingers.

" Twice?" He raises his brow.

I roll my eyes." Yes twice. " I say, tilting my chin up stubbornly.

An amused smile takes over his face.

" What's so funny?"

" Nothing." He shakes his head, the smile still evident on his face.

I narrow my eyes at him, but this seems to make him chuckle. " You are so cute." He says, pulling me closer.

I close my eyes, feeling my face heat up when he kisses the corner of my lips, letting his lips linger against my skin. " People are staring Roman." I say.

" I don't care. " He leans back. " They should get used to this because I will never hide my affection for my girl. "

My eyes widen in surprise when he steals a kiss. He's left me frozen in place. He smirks at me, wiggling his brows.

" Roman O'Connor, what am I gonna do with you?" I shake my head, not believing he just did that.

" Unfortunately, you can't get rid of me because I'm here to stay."

Before I can say anything, Nick comes over and we all chat for a bit. He tells us that Melissa had gone to put Rosy to bed and would be back soon, just as he was talking about an hour or so being left for the countdown, Roman tells him that he and I are retiring back to our room.

Nick accepts this and it's not long before we leave the party, and we head back to our room. On the way, Roman had suddenly picked me up and carried me back to our room.

" Are we really doing this?" I ask him, wanting to be sure.

" I'm sure." He nods, before taking the scizzors and holding them between us.

We had both undressed and changed into matching white shirts, in which we'd bought one day, I had my leggings on and while he paired with sweatpants. We were finally committing to something we'd talked about in passing, my hair.

He would cut it for me, not chunks of hair, just a bit, enough to notice notice. I wanted to enter the new year with my new hair. To approach the year with a fresh and new look. Cutting my hair is like a symbol of newness and beginning again. It's like starting afresh.

And Roman, wanted to do this for me.

" Close your eyes for me." He says.

I close my eyes, feeling slightly nervous.

" Are you ready?"

" Hmm." I nod.

I feel his hand in my hair before I drown out my surroundings from my mind. I think about the new year and what it may bring, either way knowing that Roman is here and he is here to stay. This time I will enter into a new year with expectation of good things to come, with the love of my life here with me.

" Done." He says, too soon.

I open my eyes and try decipher his reaction but it's unreadable. He places the scizzors aside and starts running his fingers through my hair. Once he is done, he takes my hand and pulls me up, leading me to the bathroom mirror.

" So what do you think?" He asks, standing behind me.

" It's short."

" That's it?" He asks, with a cute frown on his forehead.

I turn around to face him. I smile at him before wrapping my arms around him, looking up at him. " I like it, very much."

A relieved smile lifts on his face.

" Good." He says, leaning down to kiss me. " Because I like it too."

My smile widens.

He pecks my lips twice before telling me to wait here for a minute, I shrug and turn back around to face the mirror, wanting to really check out my hair and for my eyes to get used to it, while Roman carries on with whatever he's doing.

It's not long before he comes back and when he does, he takes my hand in his and leads me out of the bathroom. Us heading towards the balcony sparks my curiosity and what I discover there, makes my heart to jump.

There's a small table situated in the corner of the balcony, it's filled with a bottle of champagne, a bowl of mixed chocolates, another bowl of strawberries, rose patels are splattered all over the table, it's so cute and romantic, I can't help but say awww, at him.

He crunches his nose at me.

" Hazel." He groans, his ears and cheeks turning slightly pink.

He is embarassed and shy about this. He is a romantic at heart, I don't think he's taken notice of that.

I step closer to him, wrapping my arms around his middle.

" I want to tell you something." I say.

" What?"

I lean close to his ear. " I am fond of you." When I look at him again, an emotion passes through his eyes .

" I can't believe that I once ran away." He says, touching my hair." Three words, made me run for the heels."

" I cried so much when you did, I wanted you to come back so badly. I thought you would never comeback, but you did."

" But I did."

" You always come back for me Roman O'Connor. "

" And you've long waited. Now here we are, together finally." I smile at that.

From a distance, we hear the shouts of people, doing the countdown. He leans down to rest his forehead against mine, cradling my face as he joins everyone else. Once he reaches the number one, he starts to pepper my face with kisses, making me giggle.

" Happy New Year Roman." I murmur.

" Happy New Beginnings." He says before connecting our lips for a toe curling and sweet kiss.

His lips against mine make my heart to flutter. His closeness gives me warmth, safety and makes me feel as if I am in cloud nine. All that is Roman entwines with my very being and being his, feels right. It is right.

I can't ever imagine anywhere else, I'd rather be then in his arms, the arms of my best friend, the guy I love and adore.

When he leans back to look at me, his eyes smile down at me. He holds up his finger, telling me to give him a minute before he walks past me and towards the table. I watch him as he pops open the champagne bottle and then pour us each a glass. He then walks over and hands a glass to me.

" To us." He says, holding the glass up.

" To us." I repeat, clinking our glasses together.

I have my own sip, wiggling my brows to him and making him laugh. I grab a strawberry before walking over to stand, close to the rail. I watch celebrations happening all around, the night being beautiful. I feel him step close behind me and his arms wrapping around me, I tilt my head to the side, giving him better access as he buries his head in the crook of my neck, touching his lips to my skin and causing my eyes to close, under the effect.

" Tell me." He murmurs against my skin.

"Hmm..."

" What do you see right now, at this present moment?"

I open my eyes and look ahead.

" I see the stars and celebrations. What do you see?" I ask, tilting my head up to look at him.

He looks down at me.

" I see a whole new world of opportunities. " He kisses my forehead before staring ahead. " You know, my one true wish came true. I have my Hazel Grace back. I have my Sweet back."

He looks back down at me." You are my hope Hazel Grace."

I smile at him and he smiles back at me.

*****

It's the first day back at the Academy, a place at first, I had no desire to return to, all because I didn't want to be reminded about what had happened, to me once. That Summer night I almost lost my life, along with the second chance I am blessed to have received now.

I returned with so much uncertainty yet determination to lay low, and stay hidden. Things didn't turn out how I imagined and now here I am, sitting in the auditorium just like that first day of returning to school. Like before, Sam sits next to me as we listen to dear ol' Ms Pru, give off a speech and again, similar to that day, the sound of the doors bursting open echoes throughout the room.

All talking ceases and we glance to the back and sure enough, Roman and Colton make an appearance, looking like they have no care in the world. His bag hangs loosely on his shoulders, shirt not tucked in and hair unkept but damn, he still looks hot. Roman O'Connor is insanely hot and he is all mine.

I watch as his eyes search around the room until he finds me. I throw a wink his way and he smirks at me.

" Take your seats boys, we don't have the whole day." Ms Pru says.

Colton goes on to take an available seat but Roman remains standing. I frown at him, wondering why he is just standing there, staring at me.

' Come here' He mouths.

' No.' I mouth back.

He must be crazy if he thinks I'll get off my seat and go to him, infront of everyone.

I watch as a cute frown plays at his features but I shake my head, turning back front.

" You might wanna go now." Sam says.

" You must be out of your mind too. I'm not going anywhere." I say, crossing my arms.

" Mr O'Connor, is there a problem?"

" Oh gosh, don't tell me he's still standing there." I whisper to Sam, not wanting to even glance behind me.

" Yep, he still is." Sam says, stealing glancing behind.

" What is he thinking ?"

" Hazel Lovett, who else?" I glare at Sam's smirking face.

" Mr O'Connor, we don't have - ," We hear Ms Pru again.

" He's coming over." Sam whispers to me, making my eyes to grow widen.

I slide down my chair, wanting to remain small and unnoticeable. My plan doesn't work when Roman makes his way over to me, more over to stand infront of me with a raised brow.

" Roman." I say through my warning tone.

" Hazel." He says, his tone teasing.

" Go back."

" I just came for my girl, that's it!" Roman announces, not tearing his eyes from me.

" Roman."

" Will you come with me or should I carry you?" He threatens with a mischievious glint in his eyes.

I groan out and finally stand up, knowing that I have no choice in the matter. He takes my bag and my hand and he drags me away from my seat, earning us so many eyes. I keep my eyes to the ground the whole time, my face burning in embarassment.

I quickly sit down once I find an empty seat, covering my face with my hands. I jump slightly, gasping when I feel his hand touch my thigh. I remove my hands from my face and glare at him.

Before I can even scold him, he steals a kiss, making me to blink at him in surprise. His lips stretch into a devious grin, making me huff in irritation where I turn away from him.

" Maybe I should have carried you all the way over here." He says in my ear.

" Shut up O'Connor." I grumble, with my face burning up.

It's the first day and already this happens.

" Look at me Sweet."

I shake my head no.

" But I want to tell you something."

I still shake my head, refusing to even glance at him.

" I don't want to hear it Roman." I whisper yell, still feeling much annoyed.

I try by all means to ignore him and focus on what's being said, but ofcourse Roman will do just about anything to distract me. He tucks hair behind my ear, before I feel his fingers intwine with mine.

All sense of irritation leaves me when he starts to draw patterns on my palm. His touch relaxes me and makes me to forget why I was annoyed in the first place, more so what is being said infront. I look at him and for a while I remain looking at him.

" I am fond of you." He says, making me to shake my head as a smile takes over.

On our way back home, we stopped over for a few things, mostly things for Snuffles. The new edition to our family. He is the cutest and fluffiest dog, I have ever seen. He just fits so well with us and everyone adores him, especially Roman.

He becomes a little boy again. Each time I watch him with Snuffles, I never regret my decision of getting the dog for him. I just couldnt resist when I saw Snuffles, Roman instantly came to mind and the answer was right infront of my eyes.

When I first introduced the two of them, it was on Roman's birthday and I had sent him on a treasure hunt, Roman finally discovered him in Melissa's garden, in a gift box that had a framed picture of us ontop.

Everything that played out on his face when he saw Snuffles, made it all worth it. He has not stopped thanking me for him eversince. Unfortunately Snuffles had to stay with his family until we found another place, that allowed pets. This makes it uneasy to leave Snuffles each time and I can see, how it affects Roman.

Today was no different and I felt sad for them. I can' wait until we all a are a family and are living together.

" Me too." He says, rolling over to lay on his back, so he is looking up at me.

" Everything just feels right doesn't it?...Snuffles makes it a whole lot better." I say, pushing his hair away from his face.

He sits up and faces me, interlocking our fingers.

" You know Hazel Grace, every moment spent with you makes me believe even more, that I am blessed. No amount of words could ever measure to what you do to my heart, to how deeply and crazy I am, inlove with you."

" You don't even need to say it Roman. I know it, I can feel it and that is enough for me."

" And you are enough for me. You are just right for me. You are the best of me Hazel Grace and none can ever take your place in my heart, because in my eyes You are my sunshine, my hope." He sighs, with his thumb caressing my cheek.

He looks me in the eyes as he says the words, that create a flutter, in which I realized in time, that it could only be meant for him.

" OH My Sweet, I am Fond of you. "

~ The End.~

●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●

It's official!!!!

Begin Again has come to an end. But dont you worry, An epilogue is coming up.

I am grateful to everyone who had given this book a chance, there were times I wasn't sure if I wanted to continue with it, but here we are.

I hope you have enjoyed it.

You guys are awesome.💙💙💙💛💛💛💛💛💖💖💖💖💟💟👊💟💟💟💓💓💓💝💝💝💗💗💗💗💗💗💚💚💚❤❤