❝Silly girl,
your different
was your beautiful
all along.❞

05

GOING
参入

. . .

Noah deserved to be called more than annoying.

Ever since I told him about Blake's invitation, he wouldn't shut up his question. He called and was acting like an overprotective father.

"Again, Cassie, are you sure it's a good idea to go out with a customer of ours?" he repeated a question he had asked at least ten times.

"What could go wrong from just hanging out with someone? He's a person, not just a customer at the café," I tried to reason. "Besides... I've had my therapy already, Noah." I bit my lip.

"I'm not sure you're ready—"

I wasn't entertained enough to hear him ramble about the same topics. I mumbled a quick 'I'm in a hurry' with a humourless smile and hung up.

I gave my look a final once over in the wall-long mirror. I sported a Charleston pair of jeans and a honey-brown coloured t-shirt I tucked inside the waistband. It matched my eye colour and made it clearer. My chestnut waves of hair were loosely tied to my back, leaving it free to leave my tie and hang beside my face sometimes. I slapped some sunblock on my pale skin and rubbed some lip balm on my lips in a hurry. I looked presentable at least, I believed.

I opened the door to take my way out. Perhaps I looked visibly annoyed, but I was looking forward to a good day to change that.

'on my way,' I texted Blake in a rush.

As he attended the same café I worked for, he actually lived close by as well, but I didn't know where exactly. I could tell from his car-free invitation to a park he claimed was a walking distance from where he lived. The said park was close to me too.

I didn't bother to check what he replied since I liked to enjoy my walks and focus on my surroundings. I witnessed the afternoon sky turn into a warmer hue of orange, the birds flying back to their homes and the streets less crowded with vehicles. The beautiful setting wasn't exactly the right match for my thoughts, however.

"Why would he tell me that over a text seconds after he was in front of me?" I mumbled to myself, kicking a small pebble with my feet as I walked.

Maybe he feared rejection like when he gave me his number too. It got me wondering, how would it go like if I actually rejected it, what kind of anxious guy he was to fear rejection that much. I shrugged, not putting much thought into it as it didn't seem to deserve my time anyway.

I entered the park's gate, and my eyes immediately roamed the place for a trace of him. The park was almost empty at that time of the day as parents preferred their kids to play during the daylight. However, some couples still occupied benches, and some picnics were still taking place under the huge, shielding trees. The paved route for walkers was as inviting as ever.

"Boo," I heard from behind me.

I turned around and smirked. "That's one depressing ghost," I remarked.

He came closer to me with a lopsided grin. "I didn't intend to scare you, but if you want me to, I'll show you."

Blake wore a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt —too simple yet complimented his body well. When the wind hit by, I could see a little of his body outline under the thin t-shirt. His hair was brushed back neatly, allowing me a better look at his face.

I tried my best to not look for too long. Before I could come up with a reply to his dare, he had thrown a can of iced coffee my way.

I observed the details on the can. "I don't like this..." I mumbled, eyebrow raised.

"Sorry?"

"Nothing. Thanks for this." I shook my head with a polite smile. "So, you're trying to pay me back for the coffee?"

He chuckled. "I'm not sure if a cheap can of iced coffee is worth a cup of coffee made by you."

I blushed. Just a little. "I'll take that as a compliment." I popped my can open.

He cackled, cutely if I may add. "It is, Cassandra."

I took a sip. "Cass. Cassie. I know I have a long-ass name."

For a second, his eyebrows knitted, and he looked deep in thought. "Not sure how you can make a nickname out of Blake..."

"You sound scared." I chuckled. "Blakie?" I tried.

He cringed. "I thought nicknames are shorter versions of the name itself."

I took a sip. "Not in your case."

"How old are you, by the way?"

"Twenty-two. How about you?"

"Hmmm, close enough. I'm twenty-four."

"I'm curious, when did you start drawing then?"

"Oh... well, since long when I was a kid. I lived in a chaotic household, so it helped me cope with it."

I stared up at the sky, stirring his words in my head. I wished I knew how to do something as beautiful as drawing to help me cope back then. It would've helped loads for sure.

"Hmmm, same about the household thing, but I didn't do anything to fight it except I loved making coffee and wanted to be a barista. I just pushed it to the back of my mind, and now when I am old enough, I live on my own. I have an unused business degree, though."

He nodded.

We had a silent moment to ourselves to watch the beautiful scenery of sunset. At that moment, I reminisced my last time watching the sunset with someone or actually watching it anyway. It was a shame my last sunset was with someone I dreaded remembering, but it turned out I was missing on so much of a mood maker...

"Thank you." He looked my way and continued, "for accompanying me."

There was a spark in his eyes that told me he was more thankful, appreciative, of this little hangout than he should've been. I was sceptical of what to say...

Although I was not the awkward type, I felt the vibe getting a little uncomfortable. My cigarettes pack was in my hand in no time, offering him to share one with me.

He pulled one out. "Thanks, Cassie."

I lit his, then mine. "Don't mention it."

He stirred the can slowly, gazing down at it. "It means a lot more than you think to me. Been a while."

"What does?"

"Accepting to come with me. I just moved to this neighbourhood for my new job. Feels kinda lonely as I haven't made any type of bond with anyone yet. I only have one friend who lives around," he explained.

I only nodded and smiled. As small as the gesture was, I was glad it took off some of my loneliness.

"Do you have a girlfriend?"

He looked taken aback, then he laughed, really laughed. That guy was really working on making us awkward together. What was hilarious about relationships? If anything, they were hurtful as fuck.

"I broke up with my fiancée right before I moved in here."

Fiancée? Ouch. To reach that level in a relationship but ending up parting must be doubly hurtful.

I couldn't look him in the eyes. "Oh, damn... sorry."

Blake shrugged. "Kinda over it, kinda not, but all good." He gave me a tender look.

"Is it okay if I ask, why?"

"Hmmmm. That's a story for another day. But how about you?"

I shuddered, probably looked ridiculous blinking at him at that question. That was not my favourite memory, but I summed it up in one sentence, "No. I broke up on bad terms two years ago, eh." I cringed. "Quite frankly, I'd prefer we never mention this again."