The morning after Herb returns from head office, he comes to see me to tell me Blake isn't in the DRC, but he can't tell me, due to confidentiality, where he is, only that he's safe. The weight that comes off me is enormous, and while I want to pepper him with five hundred other questions, I'm just grateful to know he's okay.

Later that afternoon, Herb mentions that his friend owns a dog sledding company, and he wonders whether I might be interested in giving it a try on the weekend.

"With you?" I ask, skeptical. He's not married, and even though he helped me get my book to Blake, I don't want him to get the wrong impression. The last thing I need is some awkward workplace dynamics.

"Not with me," he says with a smile. "But I can get you there. My friend had a cancellation. Thought you might like the Canadian experience."

When I don't immediately say yes, he seems to search for more to tell me.

"It's an overnight thing. Run the dogs to some outbuildings. Stay the night. Run them back. There's dinner and breakfast included."

"Your friend isn't a murderer or anything?" When I had Blake, I rarely worried about anything, but this is a base level question. No ax wielding dog sledding murderers. Might pack my bear spray just in case.

"Upstanding, regular citizen." Herb's lips twitch. "No murdering."

"It's not just me."

"It's not just you."

"All right," I say. "I'm in. Saturday?"

"Saturday. I'll pick you up here around noon and drive you to the location."

I take a deep breath before I turn back to my work on the computer. Maybe this will be just what I need, something to break me out of this heartbreak funk. Dog sledding was something Blake and I talked about on our trip, but we were traveling during the wrong season.

Other than coming here, I haven't been on any adventures since we went our separate ways. Adventure used to be my default setting.

If Blake didn't go to the DRC, then it's pretty clear he was just saying "no" to me and not the circumstances around us. And that means I really do need to find a way to let him go, to stop carrying the flicker of hope so deep in my heart.

~ * ~

Since I'm fairly new to the area, I don't realize we're going to the airstrip until we're already turning down the road to take us there, signs proclaiming air traffic ahead.

"The sled dogs are at the airport?"

"You're catching a commuter plane to Nunavut. Did I forget to mention that?"

"Uh, yeah, you did. You're sure this isn't a murder situation?"

"Positive," he says with a chuckle. "No one is going to murder you."

The way he says it makes me think there is some kind of a catch, but I'm just not smart enough to get it or realize it. Something weird is going on, and my heart starts to race. I take out my work phone, and I text Izzy all the details of this trip, just in case.

Then I climb out of the SUV, and I head toward the steps to the plane. It's cold and overcast, so it feels more like dusk than mid-day. Up until now, I hadn't realized how much I'd come to depend on Blake to feel safe. My heart hammers as I climb aboard, and when I get to the entrance, I'm surprised at the lighting. It looks like the inside of the plane has been decorated with fairy lights.

My racing heart slows a little. It's actually quite pretty in here. Romantic, even.

"Hi," a familiar voice says from the front of the plane.

I jump and scream, dropping my bag and clutching my chest. "Oh, my god, Blake!" I fly at him down the narrow aisle, and I collide with him so hard, he lets out an oomph.

His familiar minty cologne envelops me, and he buries his face in the crook of my neck, and a sob breaks loose from me at his closeness. I can't hold it back, and I don't even try. I cry so hard I can't catch my breath.

"I'm sorry," he murmurs in my ear. "I'm so sorry." He keeps saying it over and over as I cry. "I love you so much."

"You. Broke. My. Heart," I choke out between sobs.

"If it's any consolation," Blake says, "I broke my own too."

I back away from him, and I wipe my tears. Then I shove him, hard. "I thought you were in the DRC. This whole time I've been terrified. Terrified that you were going to die. And you've just been, what? Swanning around the world avoiding me?"

"I'm sorry," he says, and he looks anguished. "I didn't even—I didn't even consider that."

"You said you were leaving me to go there, so if that wasn't true, was it just that you didn't want to be with me?" My voice cracks at the end.

"No," he rasps. "The opposite. I went..." He sucks in a deep, shuddering breath. "I went back to therapy. I was determined to go to the DRC, but then Ang and I talked, and I realized the DRC was just a way for me to cling onto the past. I was afraid of what it meant to move forward."

I swallow down more tears, and I search his face, trying to figure out if this is the truth.

"I'm so in love with you," he murmurs. "So deeply, painfully in love that I would have done anything, anything to keep you safe. Even if that meant smothering you, restricting you, stopping you from doing the things you love." He hesitates for a moment. "Like forbidding you to take this job. Or emailing HR to ask that they give you a low risk placement." He gnaws on the edge of his lips. "I would have been the exact opposite of the partner you need. And I just... I couldn't come back to you until I knew that my love for who you are is greater than my fear of what might happen."

"You couldn't have just told me that?" Tears garble my voice.

"I didn't know if I could get there. I've spent six years trying my hardest not to feel for anyone what I feel for you, and I hadn't done the work to prepare myself to meet someone like you. For any of what you bring to my life."

"And now?"

"Honestly, I still don't know if I'm one hundred percent ready. Sometimes you don't know that until you're doing it. But therapy gave me a toolbox, and I've learned how to use the tools. I don't want to hold you back, Gwen, I want to grow with you. You make my world a brighter place, and I don't want to dim your light."

"You're not going back to the DRC?" I ask.

"I want to be where you are—wherever that is, if you'll have me."

"You're joining the Northern Canada project?" I ask, wiping the last of my tears. Part of me still can't believe he's standing in front of me, and I circle my arms around him and press my cheek against his chest again. He may have to have me surgically removed.

"It's a bit complicated since we've been in a relationship, but I want to, yeah. Herb will have to speak to you on your own on Monday, just to make sure you're okay with everything."

"Of course I'm okay." I stare up at him.

"I wasn't sure how you were feeling. I tried to call you a few times, but it went straight to voicemail."

"Recently?"

"Last couple of weeks, once I was sure I was headed in the right direction."

"I got a phone when I joined Doctors International, so I haven't touched my personal one. It's probably dead." It didn't even occur to me that he might try to reach out. He'd seemed so firm in his decision. What I wouldn't have given to know he was okay, that he couldn't stop thinking about me the way I couldn't stop thinking about him.

"Your graphic novel was both unexpected and the best thing I've ever received. I had no idea you were doing that."

"I had a lot of big feelings and no where to put them."

He kisses my temple, and silence settles between us. "The ending, though. I'm not sure that'll give readers the satisfaction they deserve."

That makes me laugh a little. "I'm not opposed to revisiting the resolution, given the right motivation."

"I'll see what I can do to inspire you," he says, feathering kisses along my neck. A shiver goes down my spine.

"Does this mean we're not going dog sledding?"

"Oh, no. We are." He lets out a light chuckle. "Herb's son in law is probably just waiting for us to take our seats."

"That's right," an unfamiliar voice calls from the cockpit.

I laugh at the realization that he just heard all our drama.

"We really are flying to Nunavut, and I've booked us a private dog sled to a cabin in the woods for the night. Then the team will come back and pick us up again Sunday afternoon. An adventure and a chance to talk all of this out, just the two of us." Blake searches my face. "If you're willing?"

"I couldn't be more willing." I'm brimming with relief and love and so much hope for what comes next.

I drag Blake into the closest seats. After we've tightened our seatbelts, I loop my arms around his, and I rest my head against his arm. He kisses the top of my head.

"You ready for our next adventure?" Blake asks.

"As long as I'm with you," I say, "I'm ready for anything."

"We're cleared for takeoff," Herb's son-in-law calls from the cockpit.

And then we're speeding down the runway, lifting off into the rest of our life together.

The END

If you liked the story, I'd really appreciate if you left a comment about your favourite part(s)--whether that's scenes or characters or lines. 

Adding this book to a public reading list is also really helpful for other people searching for good reads or things they'd enjoy. 

I'm happy to provide some bonus content if people would like it. I can do two free ones, and then subsequent ones will be paid. I'll try to make the most popular requests the free ones. Chime in, like comments. Give me all your wants! 

I'll have to finalize my two frees ones by next Wednesday so I can write and schedule them. But I'll give people some time to like comments, drop their ideas, and talk amongst yourselves before I start writing. 

Meanwhile, I'm also writing a spinoff to the Bellerive Royals on Radish. The title on Radish is The Billionaire Baby Daddy. Here's the summary, if you want to check it out:

Fresh out of college, billionaire playboy, Gage Tucker, is poised to take his future by the horns. At least, he thinks he is. But then a woman in America keeps calling, claiming he fathered a child from a one night stand. Seems impossible until a DNA test proves him wrong. The minute he lays eyes on Ember Whitten, his daughter's aunt, her fragile strength spurs an unexpected protectiveness. Now he has to figure out where his real priorities lie.

After her sister dies, Ember Whitten is left in charge of her infant niece. Unable to work and with bills piling up, she's desperate enough to reach out to the man listed on her niece's birth certificate.

When Gage sweeps into her apartment complex, pays all her debts, and offers to transform her life if she'll move in with him for the next four months. It's a deal Ember can't resist. She might not believe men can be trusted, but she's willing to take his money, just the same.

What she doesn't count on is how all those long days and nights together in his home draw them closer, that when he sweeps in to rescue her a second time, it'll change the trajectory of both their lives forever.

Episodes will release Tuesdays and Thursdays, and I have enough scheduled there to go on until May... so it should be consistent, and may even go faster once the book is finished offline.

The first three episodes are already up. If you want to check it out, you can go here: https://radish.app.link/QG3vBCrchyb

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Completed March 24th, 2023