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Chapter Forty-One

Addie was lacing up her corset, one that she had recently exchanged for a new style to better fit her increasing state, when she heard a sigh behind her. She grinned at the sound of approaching feet on the soft carpet of the bedchamber.

Gently Theo put his hands to where hers had been working on the stays, silently offering his assistance. She let him take over, his firm hands manipulating the string efficiently. Addie cocked her head to the side to lean against his shoulder.

"What has put you in such a mood today?" he asked.

"And what mood is that?"

"You seem...high-spirited. Determined."

She considered that. "I reckon I am. You see, I have a plan."

Addie expected him to dismiss her, but he was quiet for several moments. He finished lacing her stays, and she moved to put on her gown.

"You've nothing to say?" she asked finally, unable to wait any longer for a response.

Theo chuckled a humorless laugh. "Oh, I've plenty to say. But Andrew says I need to be more trusting and less...controlling." A rush of air blew through him in a deep sigh. "So, what is this plan of yours?"

Theo began to help fasten her gown, and she dropped her hands to her sides.

"Well, as I had been saying before you rudely dragged me up here—"

"Excuse me," he interrupted, "I believe I distinctly remember you asking me to do that sooner next time."

Addie smiled at him sheepishly, a blush spreading across her face. A light brush of Theo's fingers splayed across her cheek, smugness on his face. Addie tried to continue, drawing in a deep breath.

"We simply need to draw out the killer. If I attend George's funeral, I can make a public statement that I am not his murderer. People might not believe me, but that isn't the point. If someone truly wishes me dead, they won't miss the opportunity that I might show at his service."

"All right," Theo drew out the word. "But who is to say that the killer would make a move to expose himself?"

"During the service, it would be unlikely," Addie agreed. "But if I make a very public, solitary exit, it would allow him, or her, the perfect opportunity to follow me."

"So, you wish to be bait," Theo said bluntly.

"Precisely," Addie said.

Having finished with her gown, Theo moved away to sit on the edge of the rumpled bed.

"Adelaide," he sighed. "This is a terrible idea. If you do not wish to think of your own safety, think of our child's."

"We will be perfectly safe, Theo. If you should notice anyone following me, then you and Will can come assist me in stopping him. I can come prepared, after all. Besides, I am thinking about the baby. This child has a rightful place on the throne of England one day. And if I want that to be possible, we need to ensure that his mother isn't wanted for murder. We haven't worked this hard for me to regain my position in court to simply give up now after only a few months."

Theo was quiet. She glanced over to see him studying his hands.

"When that child is on the throne, who will his father be? Prince George of England or the Duke of Kingfield?" he wondered aloud.

"I—I don't know," Addie answered lamely. "It depends on a great many things. Our future together is unclear, Theo."

Theo was across the room in less than a second. "I would marry you this instant if I could, Adelaide. Marry me. Please marry me," he said in a near-whisper, leaning in close to her. His lips grazed along her face. Every inch of her warmed beneath his kisses.

She forced herself to back away. "Don't you see, Theo? I cannot marry you. Certainly not until my name is cleared, at the very least. You do not wish to live this hidden life with me."

He grabbed her face, forcing her to meet his eyes.

"Adelaide, I would live any life with you."

She searched his gaze. "Theo, I once heard you say you could not imagine ever marrying into the royal family. This is not what you wanted for your life."

His hands dropped to her waist as he gave her a quick tug. She flew into his hard chest as he emitted a low growl and said, "I want you. Damn everything else."

Addie gasped, betraying the way he made her feel. A deep shiver blossomed within her.

"I do not care if you are a royal, Adelaide," Theo continued, speaking in an intense murmur that seemed to caress her skin. "I would not care if you were a maid or a governess or an earl's daughter. You are the woman that I love. And for Christ's sake, you are carrying my child."

Addie withheld a whimper at his words. Her heart soared, and yet she wouldn't allow him to sway her decision.

"I cannot be with you, Theo," she blurted.

"Why not? You did not even think about it! You didn't even consider the idea of us being together even though I know you love me, Adelaide."

"I did think about it—that was what I was thinking, Theo. You have asked me to marry you, and I gave you the first answer that was in my head. Besides, it is too risky for you, Theo."

"God, Addie." Theo gripped his hair in his large hands, his muscles tensing as he did. "You needn't shout things out the moment they flash through your mind."

"Yes, I do. If I don't, then I would be forced to consider the possibilities." Addie knew she sounded crazed, but he simply did not understand.

Proving her thoughts true, Theo stared at her blankly. Finally, he said, "Many people would consider that wise. Many people would consider marrying the father of your child to be wise."

"You do not understand!" she all but yelled, ignoring his words. "Then I should be made to decide between my head and my heart."

"So you let your impulses decide for you?" He was nearly as mad as her. "What a childish notion. Is that how you've handled problems your whole life?"

"No," she said, dropping her voice. "When I was still a princess—"

"You are a princess," he cut in.

She brushed the comment aside, continuing. "I was so certain of who I was, of who I wanted to be. And I knew that every word I spoke would reflect upon my perfectly crafted persona. So I thought—overthought—every word that came to mind, though many times it would leave me twisting my words as they came too carefully out of my mouth."

She took a deep breath. "But now, I do not even know who I am, Theo! I have no reason to restrain, no reason to hold back. There is no identity to stay true to now."

Addie threw her hands in the air in a questioning gesture. "Am I a princess or a lover or a queen or simply a dead man's wife? I could not tell you. But I know I should not say yes to your proposal."

Theo stepped forward, grabbing her hands in his. "If you don't know who you are, then how do you know what you should or should not do?"

"Because marrying a man for love, despite all obstacles, is not what I've been taught to do, Theo," she said flatly.

"And are you the person you've been taught to be, Addie?" he whispered.

"I—" She faltered. She thought of growing up the daughter of a king and queen: of the tutors, the lessons, the strategic planning, the charities. And then she thought of herself now. Addie thought of the last years of her life in which she had experienced grief and love so painfully that it felt tangible at times.

She reflected on the things she had done, the ledges she had tread upon to merely stay alive.

"I know who you are," Theo said softly. "And I think if you let yourself think beyond the scared voice in your head, then you would see it too."

She shook her golden head, hair falling down around her. Her beautiful eyes brimming with water. "I do want to marry you, Theo. But I..."

"I cannot make you, Adelaide. I will wait for you to see for yourself that you—the way you are just now, the way your heart burns—is exactly who you are and need to be."

Tears were shining her eyes, falling down her face as she fiercely fought his words for a reason she didn't know. "You told me you had no desire to marry. That you were afraid that you wouldn't be able to protect a wife. And I would be the most dangerous wife you could have, Theo."

He only threw his head back and laughed. The sound rang in the room and made Addie's chest tighten with overpowering emotion. "I've learned you do not need my protection, Adelaide. You need my love."

Addie took a deep, steadying breath and backed away from him. Her eyes locked on his. "If you love me and trust that I can protect myself, then help me. Help me get free from this, Theo."

He brought his forehead to meet hers and closed his eyes. "How can I say no to that?"

"Don't," she said, kissing him gently. "Don't say no."

He shook his head against hers but didn't say the word. Instead, he replied, "I won't. But Addie, your plan has a few problems. Firstly, you won't even get into the funeral without being arrested."

Addie pulled away from him and walked to the dressing table, attempting to arrange her unruly hair into something even remotely fashionable. "Yes, I had considered that. But we have two days before then, and I'm certain we will think of something."

As Addie soon learned, she was not able to think of anything. But Will, Lord Trotten, had some excellent ideas. "This is a dangerous plan," he acknowledged. "But a good one."

"A good one?" Theo said with disbelief.

"Yes, a good one," Lord Trotten repeated.

"But earlier you were warning her not to go."

"I know," Trotten said with a sigh. "But after hearing her out, it makes sense. Attending the funeral provides the perfect opportunity for Addie to reinsert herself into the public eye, to prove that she is mourning for her husband. It will send a message to the people that she isn't going anywhere and will only endear them to her and convince them of her innocence."

Addie nodded. "Yes, if I were guilty of his murder, why would I show up at his funeral?"

They were sitting in the rose room, the parlor that they had occupied earlier that day. Except now she was also wearing her rose-colored dress from yesterday and found that she disliked the way she positively blended in with the furniture. Here she was just a part of the landscape.

"I see where you are coming from," Theo said from his spot on the settee. "But even so, the minute you walk through the doors, the king will cry murderer."

Though he had groomed himself somewhat, his appearance was still more disheveled than his usual attire. And while she blended in with her surroundings, he positively stuck out. He looked more like a traveling rogue than a duke, his eyes wild and his cravat loosely tied.

Addie had to admit, she didn't hate it.

Thankfully, both men seemed oblivious to her musings.

"Let me worry about the king," Will said. "I have some sway with him, and I think that I can convince him to give you a chance to prove you had nothing to do with George's murder if only for the fact that you're carrying his grandchild."

Addie and Theo exchanged glances. Theo remained silent, letting Addie decide what to say.

"Will, George isn't the father of the child," Addie said hesitantly. A feminine gasp sounded from the back of the room.

Lord Trotten's brows shot up with surprise. "Are you sure?"

Addie nodded perfunctorily. "Quite."

"Does the king know?"

"No. He believes it is George's."

"Well," he said, tapping his finger on his knee as he thought. "I suppose King Ernest doesn't need to know about that...yet."

"Do you think that wise?" Addie asked.

"I think we don't have a choice," Will said with a sigh. "When you go to leave the funeral, the king and I can follow shortly after. If anyone makes a move toward you, the king will witness it as well."

"What will the king make of you aiding us?" Addie worried, but Will just brushed the question aside.

"I consult with the king on all matters of politics. He won't see it as aiding, but rather advising. I can easily spin it to be within in own best interests."

"Truly?"

Will nodded. "I cannot make a habit of doing so in all cases, but in this one circumstance, yes."

"And what of me?" Emilia piped up from where she had been sitting silently in the corner of the parlor. "May I be permitted to attend?" The question came out laced with sarcasm.

"No," Will said just as Theo said, "I do not think that is wise."

Emilia scowled.

"It just isn't necessary for you to be there, Emilia" Will said.

"I agree with Trotten," Theo said. "But, no one will stop you." It was clearly a warning to Will.

Emilia looked at her brother as if he had grown another head. "Really?"

Addie giggled. "Andrew told Theo that he was too controlling, so he is trying to change."

"Perhaps I should have told you that a long time ago," Emilia murmured.

Theo grimaced ruefully but instead of being offended, agreed. "Perhaps you should have."

"Wait a minute," Will broke in, rounding on Emilia. "Your brother might not stop you from attending, but I—"

"Won't either," Theo cut in and finished for him. There was no question that he had been planning to say something entirely different. Will scowled at Theo as he continued. "As long as Emilia were to stay clear of Addie, there would be no harm for her at the funeral. That being said, I am not sure why Emilia would wish to attend, but there's no reason to banish her from doing so."

Emilia nodded, beaming her thanks at her older brother. He gave her a warm grin back, and Addie couldn't help but feel contentment at the sight of the two siblings together.

"May I speak with you in the hallway, Your Grace?" Will said tersely, dragging Theo from the room and leaving no question as to what they would discuss.

Addie was pleased by the distraction, however, as she was dying to speak with Emilia alone. And apparently, the feeling was mutual. As she turned to face where the other woman was sitting in the room, Addie was startled to find Emilia sitting mere inches from her already. She reached to take Addie's hand in hers.

"You must tell me everything, Adelaide," Emilia begged, her eyes shining in apprehension.

"Me?" Addie laughed. "What about you? Whatever is happening between you and Lord Trotten?"

Emilia rolled her eyes and moved to tuck her dainty feet beneath her on the settee. "I don't know what to think about him."

"Let's start with this," Addie said gently. "Do you still love him?"

The other women scoffed. "Still love him? I never stopped loving him. But sometimes love just isn't enough."

And unfortunately, both women had lived through a life that made it impossible to deny that. Addie nodded, and Emilia let go of her hand to toy with the lace trimming on her elegant, but now utterly rumpled, dress.

"Addie, he set me from the box that was my old life, and then one day he placed me in a new one and shut the lid," Emilia said with a sorrowful glance at her.

"You are anything but shut within a box, Emilia Shepard. I saw you at the Baxley's ball. You were adored by all."

A small, sideways grin appeared on her face. "Only because of you and Theo."

It was Addie's turn to scoff. "It was your confidence that made you stand out, not the people who you stood between. Whether the onlookers liked it or hated it, there was certainly no pity to be had for you that night."

Emilia nodded her head from side to side, scrutinizing Addie's words, but then threw her face into her hands. "But don't you see!" she said, her words muffled by her palms. "Why should he be allowed to crawl back now that I am to be accepted again, as though I wasn't good enough before?"

Addie shook her head, unable to give her friend the answer.

"I think you must ask him that yourself, Emilia."

The other woman exhaled through her fingers as they slid down her face until she sat facing Addie once more, as composed as a debutante at their first ball. So in other words, only a little.

"Enough of me," she insisted, laying her hand on Emilia's once more.

"Yes alright, "Addie gave her a wan smile. "What would you like to know?"

"Tell me, Adelaide," she said, leaning in as if telling a secret. "Am I going to be an aunt?"

Addie blushed fiercely for the second time that day. "Yes."

"Oh Addie! I'm going to be an aunt! Of course, it is Theo's. And thank God for that! I knew from the first time I saw the two of you together at Kingfield House that something was going on. I couldn't be happier." She threw her arms around her and pulled her close.

Addie smiled, pleased at Emilia's reaction and grateful, not for the first time, to have found such wonderful people in her life.

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