*

Kyungsoo stirs from his sleep, seeing a vague figure disappearing and hearing fading footsteps walking away.

He rubs his eyes, "Jongin?"

Checking the clock on his bedside table, he realizes it's still 2:45 in the morning. Jongin is nowhere to be seen in their room, seeing only Luhan peacefully sleeping beside him.

Even in his sleepy state, he leans down and presses a gentle kiss on Luhan's lips before stepping out of the bed, "Love you. Stay here."

Luhan snores as a reply.

"Where did he go," Kyungsoo wears his robe and gets out of his room to look for Jongin. "Did he perhaps sleepwalk or something?"

Although knowing Jongin is not gonna be there, he still looks inside Baekhyun's room just to check. He spots the male sleeping alone on his bed curled up inside his blankets.

"But I thought Chanyeol slept here," He then closes the door and proceeds to Sehun's room next.

"So, here you are, motherfucker," Kyungsoo mutters, spotting Jongin sleeping next to Sehun. He leans closer, placing his hands on top of his bent knees to stare both at their faces closer, "Hm. I wonder who's more handsome."

Sehun snores, and that makes Kyungsoo laugh.

"Of course, it's you," he says, threading his fingers through Jongin's hair while watching him fondly. "You're my boyfriend after all." He bends down and kisses Jongin's lips. "I love you."

Then he looks at Sehun whose mouth is hanging open, "Why the fuck is he so cute." He chuckles, pecking him on the tip of his nose.

Stirring from his sleep when he hears a voice, Jongin opens his eyes slowly to spot Kyungsoo in front of him. "Kyungsoo?" He rubs his eyes and gets up careful not to wake Sehun, "What are you doing here? Can't sleep?"

"I just went here to check up on you," Kyungsoo whispers, "I'm going back to bed now. Good night."

"Wait," Jongin suddenly grabs his wrist, pulling him on the bed so that he's sitting beside him, "Stay here for a while."

"But Luhan is sleeping alone in my room. He's gonna cry if he finds out we're not there," Kyungsoo says.

"Kyungsoo, Luhan is not a baby anymore," Jongin chuckles, then he quiets down his voice when he realizes Sehun is still sleeping beside him, "Come here, just sleep on the bed with me."

"But this is Sehun's bed."

"I know, but he's a heavy sleeper so he won't notice you're here."

Jongin opens the blanket to accomodate Kyungsoo in his arms, tucking him inside cozily. Scooting closer to Jongin, Kyungsoo hugs him tight and buries his face into his chest.

"I'm sorry if I just went out of the bed without telling you," Jongin says, hugging Kyungsoo protectively and ruffling his hair fondly, "Babe, you're so warm and gentle like this..."

The only sound that can be heard inside the room is the soft ticking of the clock, the low buzzing of the aircon, and Sehun's steady breathing. Kyungsoo chooses this time to clutch on Jongin's shirt as he listens to his calm heartbeat this near.

"Jongin..."

"Hm?

He looks up to him, "I missed you a lot."

"We always see each other at home. Why would you miss me?" Jongin asks, looking down at Kyungsoo.

"I don't know, I just," Kyungsoo sighs, "I just missed you..." Then he allows himself to be enveloped inside Jongin's bear hug as he snuggles into his body warmly. "Maybe it's partly my fault anyway because I'm always mean to you. Like, I would always curse you, or nag at you, and I'm not really that affectionate towards you unlike Luhan... Maybe that's why you become distant from me..."

"Kyungsoo... What are you saying...," Jongin shakes his head, "Oh god, why would you think of that... That's not true..."

"We're always together at home, but I feel like, you don't give your full attention to me anymore... It's either you sleep with Luhan at night or you spend time with Sehun at day," Kyungsoo mutters slowly that has Jongin listening to him intently. "I actually get anxious sometimes because of that, and I wonder if time will come that you'll eventually get bored of me and totally ignore me... What if you won't love me anymore? What am I supposed to do if that happens?"

There's a clench in Jongin's heart hearing Kyungsoo spill all those words to him. Kyungsoo has been always quiet about his feelings, he never says anything unless he thinks he should tell it. Maybe all this time, he takes for granted the fact that Kyungsoo has been always there by his side.

He can't even remember the last time he asked Kyungsoo if he was okay.

"I have a lot of worries everytime I look into your eyes," Kyungsoo says, "If I leave you, I know you're going to be fine, but if you leave me," he shakes his head, "I will never be fine, Jongin... I love you so much... I don't want to lose you."

Jongin's hand is quick to wipe the tears falling from Kyungsoo's eyes.

"No, Kyungsoo... That's not true. I'm not going to be fine if you leave me. Thinking about it, it fucking hurts already. Maybe I'd kill myself if that happens... Yes, I'd definitely do that... I'm not afraid to kill myself if you leave me. What's the point of living if you're not here with me?"

"Why... Why would you say that?" Kyungoo says, hitting Jongin's chest.

"Because you're saying impossible things all of a sudden," Jongin cups Kyungsoo's face, "I'm not gonna leave you nor replace you. I'm not gonna stop loving you either. I will never do that ever in my life." He kisses Kyungsoo's forehead. "I'm sorry if you ever felt that way. I don't deserve you. It's my fault. It's all my fault... It's Kim Jongin's fault. He's such a fucking asshole. He should die and suffer in hell."

"No! Don't you tell that to yourself. I only have the right to say that to you," Kyungsoo says, "But hearing you say it... It slightly makes me feel better."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Don't cry now, okay?"

"I'm not fucking crying. What the hell."

Hearing Kyungsoo rant is really cute and adorable, Jongin thinks, as he squeezes his cheeks and plays with his hair while watching him dry his tears. Good thing it's Kyungsoo's soft hours now, because the male would've already shoved him away if he wasn't in the mood to be this affectionate towards him.

"Just because Sehun's there, don't think that I love you less now," Jongin says, "Yes, I may like him as a human being but he's not you. He will never be you, Kyungsoo. You're the only one who complete me and without you, I'm worthless."

Kyungsoo admits his heart jumps, hearing Jongin say that.

"Yes, I understand that you like him as a human being, but remember that you should still pay attention to me," Kyungsoo says, "I'm your main boyfriend, right? We're already long married. I'm like your wife and you're my husband."

"Of course, you're my wife and I'm your husband," Jongin says, smiling, "Fine. I'll only look at you now, I'll only give my one hundred percent attention and my one hundred percent dick to you now so that you won't get jealous anymore. How's that?"

"Good," Kyungsoo coughs, "But give Luhan forty percent, still. I can't have one hundred percent of that dick. It's too big."

Jongin laughs. "Hey. You talk like you didn't also make me feel sad, though." He fakes a frown, "Come to think of it, if there are twenty four hours in a day, you spend eight hours with Luhan at school, twelve hours in the kitchen at home, and just four hours with me. You only come to me to get my paycheck or you want to get fucked. You think I'm not also getting sad because of that?"

Kyungsoo admits he's guilty of that, "So it's my fault, then?"

"No, it's not. As I've said, it's all my fault. I should've considered your feelings. I shouldn't have taken you for granted, and I should've taken of you really well instead. You may appear scary and uncaring on the outside," Jongin says, touching Kgungsoo's face dearly as he glides his thumb on his cheek, "But you're actually as soft as a marshmallow in the inside. You have a good heart and that is what I love most about you. Well, except for your sexy ass, of course."

"I'm glad you still know that fact."

"And I want you to know that I won't trade you for anything and anyone in this world. I will always love and adore you, and that is not gonna change for the rest of my life. I promise you that."

Kyungsoo looks convinced by the way Jongin is looking at him like he is his entire galaxy, "I know... So I'm sorry for being such a whiney and dramatic bitch earlier."

"If you say it like that, then I don't have any choice but to do this," Jongin tilts Kyungsoo's chin and kisses his lips tenderly, "This." He places a kiss on his neck as well. "And this." Then another kiss behind his ear. "And this, too." And lastly on his exposed shoulder. "Mwah."

"That's sweet," Kyungsoo says as he throws his head back, guiding Jongin's head on the expanse of his neck. He feels him biting and sucking on the skin above his collarbones to create a hickey, "Ahh... Hurts... Jongin..."

"Yeah? You don't like it when I mark you?"

"No... I want it... All over me."

"If that's the case," Jongin says, letting out a smirk as he leans away for a while. "Then you should do this with me."

Kyungsoo gives him a knowing look, "What?"

"We're the only ones awake now, right?"

"But Sehun is sleeping here beside us."

"That's what I'm saying. We're the only ones awake now with him sleeping. Right?"

"Yeah?" Kyungsoo laughs, hugging Jongin closer. "What do you wanna do?"

"Well. Just some naughty stuff," Jongin says, shrugging, "You have to be as quiet as much as possible while I make you come, and let's bet if Sehun will wake up or if Sehun will keep sleeping."

"Fuck, you're such an exhibitionist," Kyungsoo giggles, hitting Jongin's chest teasingly. He wraps his arms around Jongin's neck while they engage eye contact, "I bet Sehun is gonna wake up. He'd feel the bed creek while we fuck."

"Well, I bet he's just gonna sleep. If he wakes up and hears us, he's gonna be embarrassed so he'll just pretend sleeping."

Kyungsoo shrugs, "Okay."

"Alright then, if I win," Jongin whispers to Kyungsoo's ear, "You have to take a video pleasuring yourself. Put on a blindfold or whatever shit you have in mind as you masturbate. Then you have to play that video on the TV at the living room for everyone to watch."

"You are so kinky," Kyungsoo mutters as he snickers when Jongin lifts his hand, gently kissing his wrist as well, "What if I win?"

"What do you want?"

Kyungsoo leans in to also whispers on Jongin's ear, "I want you to bottom for me," he smiles in a devilish way, "before you bottom for Luhan," then he adds, "then let's have a threesome in front of Sehun's very eyes." He smirks. "So that he knows how horny you'd look like as our slut."

"Oh god." Jongin stares at him, astounded at what he has just heard, "That," he clicks his tongue as he feels himself get hard, "That's gonna be so fucking hot..."

"I know, right. You Jongin, as the main bitch."

Kyungsoo feels himself being hovered so that he's lying underneath Jongin settled in between his parted legs wrapped around his waist. Pulling him nearer, he does the job to close the gaps in between their lips, kissing him full on the mouth until there are tongues and teeth involved.

"Kyungsoo, you're so sexy like this," Jongin mutters when he leans away briefly to check Kyungsoo's face. He sees the other male's half-lidded eyes and slick rosy lips signalling he wants to get fucked now, "Babe, you want it already?"

"Foreplay... Let's do it first," Kyungsoo says, then he's taking off his robe so that he's now naked under Jongin's touch. "Ah..." He moans quietly in a lewd way, having Jongin sucking on his nipple pleasurably while also jerking his dick in the process, "Ugh, Jongin... More..."

With his elbow, Kyungsoo accidentally jostles the alarm clock and keys on the bedside table, making the stuff fall on the floor.

Jongin can't help but chuckle, "Kyungsoo, Sehun might hear us before we can even get it on. Be careful, okay?"

"I can't..." Kyungsoo sobs, tugging Jongin's hair through his fingers as Jongin now goes down on between his legs, giving him head. "Fuck... Don't suck on my cock too hard..." He looks through his teary-eyed sight, at Jongin in between his spread legs licking his lips sinfully before blowing him again, "Ugh, when you do it like that then I'm gonna easily come on your face... Oh shit..."

"You want rimming?" Jongin asks, "Or you want fingering?

"Both, Jongin. I want both..."

Sehun furrows his eyebrows in his sleep, hearing panting and moaning noises in his deep dream. He flinches on his position and hugs his pillow.

"Ahhh... Ugh... Please... More... Yes... Just like that, Jongin..."

"You want it faster?'

Trudging down the stairs in his vivid dream, Sehun stops on his tracks when he glimpses two people at the kitchen.

"What are they doing?"

He stands on his spot unresponsive, seeing a naked Kyungsoo now splayed on the kitchen table with his knees stretched open. Jongin is kneeling in front him, his face buried in between his legs as he sucks on Kyungsoo's cock and fingers his asshole at the same time.

"I want... your cock inside me," Kyungsoo begs as he practically thrusts his cock into Jongin's mouth until he chokes, "Ah! Fuck!"

Sehun just watches the scene with his own two eyes, still in his dream, "What the hell..." Stepping back, he looks behind him, seeing an endless black hole. "What the fuck, how am I gonna get out of here!?"

After lubing himself up, Jongin moves away and hovers on top of Kyungsoo before he whispers in to his ear:

"I can feel Sehun still sleeping, though."

"He's gonna wake up now after you thrust that cock inside me."

"Well, let's see about that."

Jongin lets out a tiny smirk before slowly kissing Kyungsoo on the lips. He just simply frees his hard cock out of the garter of his shorts to tease his twitching asshole. "You want me to fuck you now?"

"Yes... Put it in..."

"Say please first, Kyungsoo."

"Please, babe... Please," Kyungsoo whispers frustratingly with all the teasing Jongin is doing. He wants to get desperately fucked already, especially now that Sehun is just sleeping beside them, "Just make me come, please..."

"As you wish," Jongin laughs, and finally thrusts his hard cock anyway, rocking his hips forward in a slow and gentle manner. "Moan my name... Quietly..."

"Ugh, Jongin.... Jongin... My---ah... Feels good... "

Still engrossed in his dream, his feet seem to be glued on the floor as Sehun finds himself just helplessly stuck on his spot, that even he wants to turn away and leave, he just can't.

Hearing and watching them do it live, he doesn't even know how long he's been staying quiet while observing how Jongin fucks Kyungsoo on top of the table, until the both of them are reaching their orgasms--- Jongin coming inside of Kyungsoo's ass while Kyungsoo coming into Jongin's hand stroking his cock into his finish.

"I'm finished... Stop now..." Kyungsoo whispers to Jongin's ear as his boyfriend lazy-fucks his come inside him under the blanket, "Is Sehun still sleeping?"

Sehun is still peacefully snoring beside them.

"Yes, he is," Jongin mutters while checking if Sehun has his eyes opened. Seeing him just hugging his pillow, he goes back to Kyungsoo and trails kisses along his chest afterwards, "He's been sleeping the whole time..."

"Looks like you've won," Kyungsoo deadpans.

"Sehun's having a good dream, I think," Jongin laughs, smiling down at Kyungsoo. He pulls his cock out and leans away to clean the mess they made on Sehun's bed, "I feel kind of guilty we fucked in his bed, though."

Kyungsoo chuckles, "Jongin, I love you."

"I love you more."

"So how about for round two?"

"Let's have it this morning so Luhan can join us when he wakes up."

"Okay."

Thud!

Hearing a sudden noise of a falling object, Kyungsoo and Jongin jolt in surprise while they look around the room to find where that sound came from.

"What was that!?" Jongin asks.

"Wait, I'll go out and check it. It must be in my room," Kyungsoo wears his robe and exits Sehun's room before Jongin can even stop him. He feels his heart race the second time he hears the noise again, louder this time.

About to head back to Sehun's room to tell Jongin what he heard, he spots a light reflected on the floor coming out from the farthest room that was once unused and locked.

"That's Chanyeol's room," he says while his eyes widen, unconsciously stepping closer towards it due to his curiosity. "Why is it open?"

It's like the door is welcoming him inside now that he finds himself standing in front of the room. Eyes widening, he clamps his mouth shut using his palm, witnessing stuff thrashed everywhere. He scans them quickly, finding polaroid pictures, letters, and some cards scattered all around Chanyeol who is now slumped on the floor.

"Chanyeol!" Kyungsoo calls in panic after he runs to get him, and that is when Chanyeol glances up to him with dark, sad, and depressing eyes he can't even bear to look at. "How did you get here!? What happened to you!?"

Chanyeol shakes his head, painful tears streaming down his face, "I don't want to live anymore... It's because of me... why my Mom died... It's because of me... why Baekhyun suffered... Just kill me already..." He grabs Kyungsoo's frail wrist and grips it hard, "Just fucking kill me!"

"W-what's happening to you!?" Kyungsoo asks, trying to remove his hand from Chanyeol's strong clutch, "I'm calling Baekhyun!"

Chanyeol grasps his arm harshly, "No!"

Scared to death, Kyungsoo uses all his strength to shove Chanyeol away before he makes an escape. He hurriedly runs into Baekhyun's room and wakes the male up.

"Baekhyun! Wake up, Baekhyun!" Kyungsoo yells, his voice is still trembling as he shakes Baekhyun furiously, "Chanyeol is inside his room! He said he's gonna kill himself!"

"W-what!?" Baekhyun asks after he wakes up, still in a daze at Kyungsoo's panicked state, "What are you talking about, Kyungsoo!?"

"Chanyeol! I think he now remembers everything!"

Baekhyun dashes out of his room in a flash of lightning, and the loud noises of the door slamming and objects crashing wake Sehun up from his sleep. Luhan who has just waken up is still wearing his clothes after he opens his door, finding everybody gathered in front of the farthest room.

Chanyeol doesn't know what exactly happened, but the moment he steps inside his old room and the moment he sees and touches his bed, his stuff, his clothes, and everything that reminds him of his past, memories and emotions of yesterday return into his mind like a surge.

"See you in New York."

He now remembers how he brought Baekhyun to that place.

"Baekhyun, are you my son's lover? You disgust me."

He now remembers how his mother hated Baekhyun and how Baekhyun suffered because of him.

"I will go back to Seoul like what you asked me. Please get better, I will wait for you until then."

He now remembers how they had to part ways because of his mental illness.

"Wait for me whatever happens, okay? I will come home to you, I promise you!"

He now remembers how he lied to Baekhyun that day and came back without knowing anything.

"Go back to Seoul and live with Baekhyun. Don't forgive me, I've been a bad mother to you."

He now remembers that day his mother died and how he regrets everything.

"It's all my fault... I don't deserve to live!" Chanyeol screams as he buries his face into his hands as he keeps on crying. His chest feels very heavy while his head is extremely hurting. "I should've died instead of her!"

The sun hasn't risen yet and it's barely even morning, yet everybody is at the edge of the door witnessing Chanyeol in this god-awful state. Baekhyun is the one hurting the most, seeing Chanyeol so broken like this.

"Chanyeol, please calm yourself down," Sehun says, blocking a now sobbing-Baekhyun wanting to get near Chanyeol who's already a mess. He turns to Baekhyun, "Stay back, we don't know what he might do to you!"

"Baekhyun, don't get near him! He might hurt you!" Jongin says, pulling Baekhyun with him, "He's in a state of shock, can't you see!"

"But Chanyeol sunbae needs me!" Baekhyun screams, and he shoves Sehun and Jongin before entering the room to get near Chanyeol. He stops, standing few steps away from Chanyeol weeping on his knees.

"Chanyeol sunbae," Baekhyun calls, "It's not your fault..." He shakes his head while he rubs his tear-filled eyes. "Don't blame yourself because it's not your fault... It's all in the past now... Everything happened for a reason. We're still here with each other and that's what matters the most... It's going to be okay... You can get through this, right? You're the strongest person I know... You'll break down but you'll stand up again..."

Chanyeol looks up to Baekhyun's face, hearing his familiar voice. He sees him cry in front of him, and that sight alone already breaks his heart.

He remembers that night they argued back in New York, when Baekhyun slit his wrist and let himself bleed. He sees himself shoving Baekhyun against the wall and strangling his neck after that, that Baekhyun almost died. He recalls that day at the hospital, witnessing Baekhyun outside the door being beaten up by his mother while he couldn't do anything but watch.

He remembers making Baekhyun cry a lot of times, when all Baekhyun did was love him with all his heart.

"Chanyeol sunbae," Baekhyun calls. "I'm here for you... So please don't suffer alone."

"Baekhyun..." Chanyeol weakly stands up and walks towards him. He lets his head fall on top of Baekhyun's shoulder, before he feels himself being pulled into a tight embrace. "Baekhyun... Baekhyun..."

Baekhyun sucks air to breathe, looks up, squeezes his eyes, and hugs Chanyeol tight as he tries his hardest not to burst into a fit of sobs. What he does is to just let his tears quietly trickle down his face, while he lets Chanyeol cry and cry and cry...

As long as Chanyeol feels lighter, he is willing to take the burden off his chest.

"I'm sorry... I'm very sorry... For coming back just now," Chanyeol sobs like a child as he catches for his breath, "for leaving you... for lying to you, for hurting you, and for making you cry... I'm really sorry... for all the things that I did from the start... All of it... I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm really sorry... I'm sorry... Please forgive me... I'm..."

Baekhyun can sense Chanyeol shiver furiously inside his hold, so when Chanyeol's knees finally give in, they both fall on the floor with Chanyeol still keeps sobbing on his arms.

"Shh... It's all right..." Baekhyun says, hushing him gently, "I forgive you, so you should also learn to forgive yourself, too... Forget all the hurt you experienced from before and just be happy... You may remember it just now, but it already happened a long time ago... I understand that it hurts, but we should let go of the past so we could start all over again.."

The rest of the guys watch the heart-clenching scene before them; Luhan already crying on Jongin's chest, Sehun staring shocked and dumbfounded, meanwhile Kyungsoo and Jongin restraining themselves from tearing up.

"I regret every single thing that I did to you that caused you pain... All of it..." Chanyeol says as he meets Baekhyun's eyes, "But I don't regret losing my memories... because you've found me again and loved me again without hesitation."

"Chanyeol sunbae, do you really remember everything now?" Baekhyun asks, touching Chanyeol's face as he stares right into his deep eyes. "Do you really remember me now?"

"Yes," Chanyeol answers, "All my memories with you... every word I've said to you... and every single promise I've told you," He holds Baekhyun's hand, "Yes, I remember everything now."

*

To be continued.