A few weeks ago, I moved houses and started attending the local high school called Indigo Academy. This is because Father had found a new art studio that wanted him and Mother found a new nursery to teach at in this new town.

  When they first announced the move to me, I was immediately so anxious and worried since I had struggled in my old middle school, and now I would be starting in a high school where I don't know anyone.

  And this led to me having a panic attack on my first day at the new school. This happened as soon as I entered the building and heard loud noises that frightened me.

  It was all so sudden and led me to me curling up in a ball on the floor and rocking up and down as I cried. This lasted for a few minutes until I heard a voice coming from above me.

  "Hey, are you okay?" The voice asked.

  I lifted my head up to see a girl with brown hair in space buns and magenta eyes. She had a friendly grin on her face, and I immediately felt a feeling I had never felt before around her.

  "N-not r-really..." I stuttered, from both the fact that I had been crying but also because I was nervous I had just messed up my first impression with her.

  She bent down and then sat closely beside me.

  "What's wrong?" She asked.

  "I just moved here so I don't know anyone, and... everyone is so loud..." I mumbled.

  "Yeah, that's understandable, but all kids are are loud anyway, even me sometimes!" The girl reassured me, "Anyways, my name is Ann!"

  "I'm Liko," I replied, wiping away my tears.

  "Wanna be friends?" Ann asked, holding her hand out towards me with a warm smile.

  I was so shocked by this since I knew for certain I had messed up my first impression and had never been in such a scenario before, but deep down, I was overwhelmed with joy.

  "Yes please!" I answered, smiling back at her.

  So with that, we stood up and then, linking arms, skipped down the hallway together.

  It turned out that Ann was actually in a lot of my classes, meaning that I didn't feel lonely and as worried as I thought I would be in them. Sure she got into trouble for talking too much and occasionally had detentions, but at least she was funny and made me comfortable to be around.

  One thing I decided to hide from her is the fact that I am Autistic, as I was worried that would push her away. When I first found this out from Mother, I decided to take pride in it and express myself for being different.

  But quickly after, I realised I had made the wrong choice by doing that. I was ostracised even more by my classmates, and was even bullied for something I couldn't help.

  I didn't want to lose her by saying, but I ended up losing her anyway...

  But before that, we were so close to the point where it felt like I had know her for years, even though it was only a few months. I even started to feel butterflies in my stomach around her...

  So with that, I started to research more about love. It was something I knew was very common for other, but something I had never quite experienced myself, or at least not until then.

  I came to the conclusion that I did have a crush on her, and felt so excited about it. Mother and Father are so cute together, and I thought maybe I could have a relationship like that but with Ann instead.

  But one thing I've learnt way too many times now is... I'm too hopeful for good things to happen.

  When I worked up the courage to tell her how I felt the next day, I got a response I had never expected to get, "So you're gay?"

  "I d-don't k-know what that m-means-" I stuttered, and tried to wrap my arms around her as i was not the best at apologising and physical touch was a staple in our friendship, "I'm sorry if that's a bad thing-"

  "Ewwww, stay away from me!" Ann yelled and then pushed me into the door of my locker.

  After that, Ann started to drift away from me and began to hang out with popular and 'cooler girls'. I was left with both a bruise on my back and... a hole in my heart...

  I'm used to being rejected and hurt, but the fact I thought she was genuinely nice, it just broke me...

  Ever since then, she and her new friends began to bully me. They poked fun at things about me that I didn't know were an issue, and called me swears words that I had no idea existed until I Googled their meanings.

  I wasn't able to make anymore friends now that my anxiety was even higher, and I started having panic attacks at home before coming to school with no one to comfort me as my parents were at work 24/7.

  I just felt so alone...