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•The worst thing about being lied to, is knowing you're not worth the truth.•
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I have to pull over, my heart thumping so loud I feel like my head will explode. I turn off the car, hands gripping the steering wheel as I place my forehead against it taking deep breaths.

I never really accepted him, so it shouldn't hurt so much. Plus it was in his past, I can't... shouldn't, hold that against him. I shudder remembering the moment I sucked in the deep breath. So many girls, so many of them carried his scent. I clench my jaw, fighting back angry tears.

"Stop Nia. You've been through worse. So much worse." My whisper seems so loud inside the car. I squeeze my eyes shut, and immediately play back my life.

Rogues. Mom. Dad. Mr. Robby. The fights. The institution. Jude. The schools. Last year.

I sit straight up as I think of what happened last year. I bite my lip and hit the steering wheel angrily.

[Flashback]

"Enania, look at me." His voice, a hint of his Australian accent peeks through, fills my ears.

"Kent, go away." I whisper, heart thundering. I don't want to let him in, I'm leaving soon. He'll just get hurt if I let him in.

"No. I worked hard to become your friend and I'll work hard to become something more. Now just look at me." His velvet voice was luring me in. I fight myself, eyes watering, until finally I look up. My brown eyes meeting his green ones, sandy blonde hair shines in the sun.

"Kent just stop. I'm leaving soon. You know that." I grind out, fighting off anger and sadness.

"Enania. I'm doing this because I want you to stay... need you to stay." His words strike me in the heart; for years I've wanted to be loved, needed, especially when Jude left. My hands grip my green and blue bracelet, immediately calming my heart.

"I can't. This is how I am. I never stay long, I don't get attached," he cuts me off before I can continue.

"Bull shit. You're attached to me, I see it and you feel it. Let me in Enania." His hands grip my face, immediately my senses are filled with the smell of the ocean. He was such a surfer boy. I choke out a laugh, eyes searching his green eyes before slowly nodding.

"I- I'll stay." My voice hoarse, but he hears. His tanned arms wrap around me spinning me around laughing giddily.

"Good. I wasn't gonna let you leave anyway." He whispers before pressing his lips to my own.

[End Flashback]

I'm gasping, trembling hands leaving the wheel to trace my lips where he took my first kiss. "Stupid, stupid, stupid." I chant over and over again, trying to block out what happens next.

[Flashback]

"Kent?" I call out, shifting awkwardly in the doorway of his house. His birthday was yesterday and he threw a huge party. He knows I wasn't that type of girl so he said he and I would spend today together. I smile a little, happily thinking of the happiest weeks of my life. Sophomore year ended and now it's full of summer parties, long summer nights, and of Kent and I. He asked me out three days after convincing me to stay, which I don't regret. I think I can have a life here, with Kent.

"Ken?" I call out softly, using the nickname that usually pisses him off because he hates Barbie and Ken. I sigh, hearing no reply I step around the garbage grimacing when I see drying throw up, but giggling when I see a guy passed the fuck out on the table two empty beer cans gripped tightly in each hand.

I run my hand through my hair, as I finally reach the stairs. I make my way up feeling like something awful is going to happen. I frown slightly, biting my bottom lip as I cautiously take a deep breath. I make a face when I smell sex and drugs; I shake my head before tilting it listening. What I hear makes my heart drop.

"Kent! Yes- Oh god!" The creaks of the bed added with that snippet should've been enough. But I need to see. I need to know for sure.

I take the last steps before opening the bedroom door that belongs to the man I've been falling for. My hands flies to my mouth as the image of Naomi Chancel bouncing up and down on Kent is permanently singed on my brain.

"Kent." My heartbroken voice flies into the room. He moves so fast if I wasn't a werewolf I wouldn't have seen.

Naomi on the ground, gasping in outrage, and Kent covering his mini him. Hands that only yesterday caressed my face promising me forevers, today gripped Naomi's hips, now reach out for me as he scrambles out of bed still trying to cover himself.

"Baby, Enania-" he cries hands still reaching for me. I feel the tears but before I let them fall, I slam up my walls. That alone I see breaks him; he worked so hard to get past them.

"Having fun?" I ask bluntly, forcing my lips up into a smirk.

"Baby don't-" he tries.

"Don't you dare call me baby." I growl out, walls briefly falling revealing the rage and heartbreak for a split second. "I'm leaving, Kent. Just thought I'd come say goodbye." I spin on my heel, hair flying out as I take the first step out before looking over my shoulder at Kent who looked so lost I almost went back to him. "Happy Birthday." I whisper out.

[End Flashback]

That night I was arrested for assault and battery. Foster parents, as predicted, sent me away, bringing me to Mrs. Pots. Even if Kent broke my trust even more than it already was, he showed me that I should try and live my life for me. And I will continue to do that.

Quickly, I wipe my tears away before starting up the car and making my way towards the Nightcresent pack. Once there they let me and I make my way to the Manor. At the second gate the guard looks at me scans his card, and lets me through.

"Janet? Rick?" I call out as I step into the house.

"Enania? Honey are you alright?" Janet says bustling out of the kitchen.

"Oh I'm fine." I say plastering a smile on my face. "I was just wondering if I can use your library? Coral mentioned books in there telling about our species." I say briefly smiling to Rick who walks down the stairs with a mug of steaming coffee in his hands.

"Of course. It's this way." Janet leads the way to the huge library before directing me to the books I wanted.

"Hey Janet," I call out, making her stop in the doorway turning to me raising both eyebrows.

"Yes?" She asks quietly.

"Please don't tell Damian where I am." My voice was soft, a little vulnerability sifting in. She looks at me sadly, before nodding and leaving me alone. "Time to learn about myself." I mutter quietly before slinging open the huge dusty book.

Damian's POV

All day. I've been out all day looking for her. Connor finally convinced me to head home, which is exactly where I'm pulling in to. My eyes snap wide open as I see the old blue car that belongs to Mrs. Pots. I growl lowly as I step inside the house. Sitting on the couch Mom and Dad watch a show, Lillian plays with dolls on the floor. All three turn to look up at me.

"Where is she?" My voice is low and dangerous; I would never hurt them but I'm livid.

"Go find her yourself." Mom says, eyes narrowing on me. "Coral told me." She says, turning around her shoulders stiff. Dad leans down to place a calming kiss on her head before looking over to me.

"Library." He mouths before turning back to his show. I run down the hall and bust the doors open. Immediately her scent fills my nose, calming me down.

"Nia?" I call out softly. I hear a scuff of shoes before a curse. "Nia please let's talk." I begin walking in the direction of the noise. I stumble to a stop when I see books everywhere, and in the middle of the chaos is my mate. Her blank face meets my own worried one.

"I didn't realize how late it was. I'm gonna go home. Have a good night Damian." She says politely before scraping the chair back and expertly weaving her way out of the mess without damaging a single book. My hands snap out grabbing her and pulling her to my chest. Her body stiffens, eyes scowling. "Don't move anything. I'll be back to finish reading." Her tone was calm and indifferent even as I place kisses up and down her neck.

"Nia. I'm sorry; I was a dumb teenager that thought he could have whatever he wanted whenever he wanted. I was impatient and didn't want to wait for my mate." Her growls fill my ears, scaring me and arousing me at the same time. I growl deep warning her. Nia scowls but the growl leaving her lips trails into a quiet grumble. "I explained it away as an excuse for me wanting to be 'experienced' for her. But I was just selfish and didn't think of anyone's feelings." I say honesty pouring into every word. "I'm so sorry Nia." I whisper out, voice cracking.

"Damian." She says softly pulling away so that we stand nose to nose, me lowering down so that my 6'5" height meets her 5'1" frame. "I can't hold what you did in the past against you." She whispers, almost begrudgingly. "As much as I'd like to I can't." Her eyes flick up to meet my own. Her hand goes to fiddle with the bracelet calming her thumping heart. "I read about mates today; about their importance, impact, and intensity." She states softly, eyes still locking with my own.

"And?" I ask breathlessly.

"I believe you and I are supposed to be together," She starts, making my heart soar. "But that doesn't mean I'm just gonna roll over, I also read about Alpha Females, and I know that's what I am, not just a Luna, but a strong Alpha." Her voice is strong, confidence seeping into her every word. I smile, eyes searching her face as she continues. "I've let people in before," her eyes darken. "And that didn't work out so well, but I'm trusting you, I'm trusting this bond, and I'm trusting myself to move on with this." She waves between us.

"Thank the Goddess!" I praise wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her impossibly closer. She rolls her eyes and shoves me back eyes narrowing.

"We go at my pace. My pace only." Her eyes challenge me, and as much as my Alpha self wants to rise to the challenge I tilt my head to the side exposing my neck making her gasp.

"You're in charge Enania." I promise. Her hands slowly frame my cheeks before correcting my head straight back up. Then slowly, oh so slowly, she softly brushes her lips over my own. Before I can react she falls back on her heels and backs away towards the front door.

"Gotta go. See ya, Alpha." She says, a smirk quirked on her lips as she sashays out.

"She's gonna be the death of me." I murmur to myself.

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•Trust yourself. You've survived so far, you can survive whatever's coming.•
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