Chapter Twelve

Under Mrs. Kovok's orders, I'm required to meet Mallory Braxton, my therapist, at least one a week and seeing as it's Friday, I don't have a choice. I have to see her. I'm not sure what will happen if I don't go see Mallory but I don't want to find out.

So, when the bell rings, I go to her office instead of my first period. She's been here for two week and somehow I'm not the only one who has things they want to talk about or didn't want to talk about in my case. Mallory is supposed to be a therapist but I think now she's more of a counselor.

I don't care what she calls herself. I'm just glad I'm not the only one who goes to her office. It's bad enough, the students were talking about my traumatizing experience but now they know I have to see Mallory as part of my healing process. I haven't heard anyone mentioned me seeing Mallory but I know they talked about it.

Lucas told Lily, they haven't said much about me in some days and I guess I should be relieved they weren't speaking about me but that doesn't change the way they view me. They think I'm a lair and they feel bad for them.

"Princess Millian." Mallory says, smiling. "I was wondering when you would come by."

"I was too." I walk into her office and so do Hayes and Maya.

Mallory looks at them. "This is a private session so I'm afraid you two will have to wait outside for Princess Millian."

It's the same thing she told James but unlike James, Hayes isn't going anywhere. It doesn't matter if I told him, it was fine. He won't leave me in this room because he wouldn't have his eyes on me.

"I'm not leaving." Hayes tells her.

"And who are you, again?" Mallory asks. "You weren't the one who came last time."

"That was James, a temporary guardian." Hayes informs her. "I'm her guardian and my orders are to watch Princess Millian."

"I assure you, she is safe here. Nothing will happen to her."

"I know she's safe because I'm staying." He replies. "And I don't take orders from you."

Mallory looks at me. "Would you tell him you're safe with me."

"I could but he still won't leave." I say. "We're actually wasting time here trying to make him leave. He's not going to do it."

"I see." Mallory says. "Okay, you may stay but you, I'm afraid, will have to leave." She tells Maya.

Maya nods. "That's fine. I'll be outside."

Mallory shuts the door when Maya walks out and takes a sit in her chair. She puts out a file no doubt it belongs to me and she glances at it briefly.

"Last time we talked, I advised you to write how you felt. Did you do it?"

I nod. "Yeah, I did."

"How did it make it feel after writing what you felt?"

I think back to the last I was in Lily's room writing how I didn't just want to survive. I still go to my dark place but it's not as bad as it once was.

"I felt lonely when I wrote it." I admit. "But at the same time, I knew I was surrounded by love."

Mallory nods her head. "That's a normal feeling. Do you mind sharing your song with me?"

"It's personal." I tell her. "I don't think I want to share it right now."

"That's absolutely fine. Whenever you're ready, I'm here to listen." She changes the topic. "Do you still have nightmares?"

"They come every now and then. But they're not as bad as they started. At least now I can sleep a few hours without seeing them."

She writes what I say down. "But they still haunts you."

I nod. "Everyday."

"Do you think seeing them will help overcome this fear?"

I can't even respond before Hayes speaks. I haven't even looked at him but I know he's angry. I can hear it in his voice.

"That's out the question. Princess Millian will never see them again. They're in a place they deserve and they don't get the privilege of seeing her ever in their miserable lives again."

I think Mallory forgot Hayes is standing off to the stand. She looks taken back by his voice and I don't blame her. Hayes can be scary at times.

"It was merely a suggestion. I would never order her to do something she doesn't want to do." Mallory speaks.

"Good. I don't want to see them." I reply.

I saw them at the trial and they looked terrible. They had this sad look on their faces as if they wanted me to see how horrible they felt for doing what they do to me. He apologize to me but I can never forgive him.

"Forgiving them is a step closer to getting your life back. Carrying all this hatred isn't good for you." Mallory tells me.

"If you were through what I did, you'll understand why I can never consider forgiving them. This isn't something you can forgive easily."

She nods her head. "I understand that. Believe me, I do and I'm not saying forgive them now or any time soon but eventually you're going to have to."

"I don't have to do anything. I already told you, forgiving them isn't an option. He took a part of me that I can never get back! He brought the darkness back that took me a while to get rid of."

"I understand-"

"No, you don't!" I say, raising my voice. "You don't understand so stop saying you do! You don't understand what I've gone through! You don't understand how I feel and you never will!" I stand up and exit her office.

I walk past Maya and she wordlessly follows me to my first period. I walk into Mrs. Garner's class and I take my seat beside Lily. She knows how I feel either by my expression or my emotion. Possibly even both. Mrs. Garner has our writing assignment on the border and I take out a sheet of notebook paper and get to work. I'm the last one to finish the assignment but I managed to complete it before class ended.

"Do you wanna tell me what made you upset?" Lily asks as we walk to our next class.

I sigh. "Mallory. I know she's trying to help me but she doesn't understand. And I can't be upset at her for not understanding." I glance at Lily. "She wants me to forgive them."

I see the anger flash through Lily's eyes for a second before it's gone. She feels the same way I do and Hayes. She opens her mouth to speak and I know she's going to agree with what I told Mallory but she doesn't say anything. She stops walking and I do too. She's staring at me but she's not staring at me. I've seen this look too many times. She's having a vision.

She blinks her eyes coming back to reality. She focuses on me and before I can ask her what she had seen, she tells me.

"You and Mallory have more in common than you know. Get to know her and you'll find out why she does understand."

I frown. "What? Why don't you just tell me what you saw?"

"Because it's not my place to. Talk to Mallory." She tells me before walking again.

I stare after her still confused. What did Mallory and I have in common? I don't know and I won't know until I speak to her according to Lily. I go to my second period and it flies by quickly.

Throughout the day, I try to get Lily to reveal exactly what she had seen but she won't. She says it's something I need to figure out. Actually, ask Mallory about but I don't want to speak to Mallory. Not if she's going to keep insisting for me to forgive them.

I try using the bond to feel what Lily is feeling but of course I'm not good at that. I'd probably have a better chance at it if I had my necklace but Abe still refusing to give it back to me. He told me when he's absolutely sure he can trust me again then he'll give it back to me.

I don't want to just feel what Lily had earlier this day but what she felt earlier this week. The day when I touched her necklace and we saw an image of an unknown field. The words from the poem echoed through our minds and whatever Lily had seen beforehand, it changed her.

She said she was fine but I knew she wasn't. That field was something she had seen before and it haunted her. I could feel it in my guts but I still wanted to hear it from Lily. I want to know why she's scared of that specific field but I know she won't tell me.

I can be wrong and she isn't scared but I won't be certain until I can feel her emotions. That's why I need my necklace. I have to get Abe to trust me. I need him to know I'm strong enough to not fall back into my darkness. But as I think about it, I don't even trust myself. I told Mallory earlier, I still sink into my dark world once in a while.

In our P.E. class, Guardian Lynn doesn't kill us for the first time this week. He actually gives us a fun day. He splits us into two team, Lily and I are on different teams. We play volleyball. Or Guardian Lynn's version of volleyball at least.

As he explain his new rules, I stare at him horrified. He can't be serious but then again I'm talking about Guardian Lynn. He's always serious and I take back the fun day part.

When we play, I try my hardest to stay far away from the ball as I can. I really didn't want to come in the game but I don't have a choice. The way the rotation is set up, everyone is going to have to come in sooner or later.

The ball flies by me fast and I'm glad I wasn't standing where I'm supposed to be otherwise I would've lost a teeth or got a black eye.

"Delariox!" Guardian Lynn yells. "Did you even attempt to hit the ball?!"

No. I think. Are you crazy?

That ball came at me too fast and if I would've told Guardian Lynn that he would've been furious at me. I think he would've been pleased if I had gone for the ball and injured myself than not going for it.

"Hathaway go in for Delariox." He orders. "Delariox give me fifty."

My jaw drops. "Wha-"

I can't even finish my word before he interrupts me.

"Make it sixty." He glances away, watching the game and I stand there, jaw still dropped. He looks back at me. "Get to it."

I glare at him and I swear if he can hear me silently cussing him out, I would've done more than push ups. I take my time doing them. I figure the longer it takes for me to do them, I won't have to go back into the game.

My arms feels like jello after I finish. The only good thing is I didn't have to go back into the game. Class ends and it takes me a while to put my clothes on. Hayes sees the discomfort I'm in and he takes my backpack for me when I emerge from the locker room.

I give him a small smile showing my gratitude. He understands and I glance at Maya. She has a knowing smile on her face as she watches us. We go to the cafeteria and I sit down, dropping my tray immediately.

"I'm sorry." Lily says, sitting down as well. "I didn't mean to hit it that hard."

"It's fine. You might've done me a favor actually."

Times goes by and I'm walking into Mr. Dean's class. I take my new seat I've gotten since school started two weeks ago. I sit two rows behind everyone else but unlike everyone else, Lucas talks to me whenever we don't have an assignment to do.

Mr. Dean walks onto the stage, getting our attention.

"I told you guys I had an announcement to make yesterday." He starts. "Well, this semester is a very busy one and it's only going to keep getting busier.  Next Friday, we have a show to put on for the children. We're not the only ones doing to show either. The band, dancers and art class will be involved as well. Today, we will decide on what song or songs we want to perform and how we want to perform it. Do we want to just stand in one formation or move around?" He shrugs. "It's up to you guys. So, start coming up with ideas. I'll be back ten minutes before class ends to hear what you've come up with."

As soon as Mr. Dean walks off the stage, everyone is talking about what they think it's a good idea. Lucas glances back at me.

"What do you think?" He asks, moving to come closer to me. He sits in the same row as me but few seats away, obeying Abe's orders.

I shrug. "Honestly, I don't know. I'm sure what they decide, it'll be fine."

He arches an eyebrow. "What?" He says in a mock surprise. "Millie Delariox doesn't have an idea. What is this world coming to?"

I smile. "Hey! I can't come up with everything."

"You don't have one single idea."

I shake my head. "Nope. What do you think we should do?"

"I think doing a mash up it's better than doing one simple song or two for that matter. If we do the mash up, we can have multiple songs and keep it interesting."

"That's really good." I nod my head. "Do you want to split the boys and girls up?"

"I don't think the girls can hold their own without us boys." He says, overly confident.

I arch an eyebrow. "Is that a challenge, I hear?"

He grins. "Always up for a challenge."

"You're on, Carter."

We separate and I bring all the girls to one side of the room while Lucas huddles with the boys on the other side of the room. I explain to the girls what Lucas and I had came up with and they are on board.

"We're totally gonna kick their ass." Ava Vanders says, smiling.

"Hell yeah!" Becca agrees.

We decide on what song we want and when Mr. Dean walks back onto the stage and we presented him what we came up with, I know he's pleased as he smiles.

"I think it's a wonderful idea. Since it's not just a typical one song, we will have to work effectively each day to make sure we can perform it on Friday. I will work with the songs we've picked and get it ready for Monday. As far as the dancing and costumes, it's in your hands. But whatever you decide make sure it's can be done before Friday."

The bells rings and I grab my stuff. We go to the SUV like we did every Friday after school but this only difference is Maya comes with us. Lily sits between us on the drive to the mansion. I say it's a mansion but it's more of a palace. I would rather call it a mansion than a palace because even after all this time and being called princess nearly everyday, I still can't believe I'm royalty. I would rather think Abe is just a very wealth person than the king of Arysn.

"Millie." Lily says in a sing song voice.

I look at her and she's smiling and it takes me a few second to realize why she's smiling and I smile too. I can see Reid, slowly reaching out his hand to change the station but Lily stops him.

"Don't even think about it." She warns him.

"C'mon. Don't do this to me." He begs.

"Too late." I say before looking Lily and we both start to sing. "Maybe it's the way she walked, ow Straight into my heart and stole it."

What surprised everyone is when Maya joins in with us. "Though the doors and passed the guards, ow Just like she already owned it."

That's when I knew I can truly trust Maya. We sing at the top of our lungs despite the protest the guys are giving us. They soon realize it's hopeless and let us sing without complaining anymore. They're happy when we reach the mansion and I think it's because they want to get away from us.

Laughing, we get out the vehicle. The laughter soon dies when Hayes speaks.

"Maya, come with me. King Abe wants to see you."

Maya looks terrified to meet Abe and I don't blame her. Abe has a reputation of being quite terrifying at given times. But that's just an act he puts on for the people most of the time. He's really nice when you get to know him. Or maybe it's because he's my dad and chooses to be nice to Lily and me.

She and Hayes disappears into the mansion to meet Abe. Lily and I venture to the living room and take a seat on one of the couches. Suddenly, I ask a random question not even she was expecting.

"Do you ever use your powers?"

She cocks an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

I shrug. "Well, obviously you have visions but there's more to that. Abe told us last year that we have greater powers and they unlocked on our eighteenth birthday. So, I was just wondering if you ever tried to use your other powers?"

She grins. "Oh, you mean like this." She holds out her hand, palm facing up to the ceiling, and in the center of her palm, a small blue fireball appears.

My eyes widens. "You've been practicing."

She drops her arm and the fire vanished. "Yeah. Only a little bit. That's the biggest I can make the fire to be so far. But look at this." She reaches behind her neck and removes the necklace. She holds out her hand again and the fire appears but it's a normal fire color instead of the vibrant blue and smaller. "Without the necklace, I only have half my powers."

"That's amazing you can do that." I tell her in awe.

"You can too. You can draw water from the air. It won't be much but it's something." She looks at me. "Have you seriously not tried to use your powers. Other than singing." She adds.

I shake my head. "No, I haven't. I didn't think I could."

Lily smiles, mischievously. "Tonight we're changing that."