Chapter Seven

I feel arms wrap around me and I begin to panic. No, not again. He's behind bar. There's no way he could've possibly gotten free. The mansion is heavily guarded. I know it's not a dream. I can't convince myself that because, I can't sleep.

Hayes hasn't called and now I'm shaking in my own bed, terrified. Afraid to turn around and look who's behind me, I continue to panic and tremble.

How did he get inside my room?

"It's okay."

His voice says and I can't focus on anything else. I hear nothing but his voice and his words he whispered to me that night.

"It's me, Millie."

Why is he here? Why did he come to me?  I can feel myself shaking and hear how heavy I'm breathing. I'm absolutely terrified and Hayes is thousands of miles away from me. I can feel the tears slide down my cheeks as I sob.

Just leave me alone.

I repeat to myself over and over again unable to utter those four words aloud.

"Look at me." He demands.

But I can't. I don't want to. I want him to disappear from my life. I never want to see him again yet here he is with his hand on my hip sending me into a panic attack.

He moves from behind me when I don't face him. I can hear his footsteps walk around the bed and the stop right in front of me. I keep my eyes from looking at him but he moves down so we're eye level.

Instead of staring into brown eyes, I find myself looking into familiar grey ones.

"It's me." He repeats.

I reach out, hesitatingly, with one hand. I touch his face seeing if it really is him.

"Hayes?"

"I'm back, Boo."

There's banging on the door and we both look at the  door.

"Millie!" My sister yells. "Millie! Are you okay?"

The doorknob shakes as she tries to open the door still banging on the door. Hayes gets up and heads over to the door. He opens it and Lily pushes pass him, coming in. She looks at me and then back at Hayes.

She frowns. "What the hell happened?"

"I'll tell you later. She's fine." He tries to assure her.

Lily gives me one more look, reaching out to feel my emotion, before leaving. Hayes shuts the door and comes back to me. I sit up as he sit down on my bed.

"I'm sorry." He apologizes. "I wanted to surprise you but that was stupid of me. Please forgive me."

I swallow. "You scared the hell out of me. I thought you were him."

"I know and I'm sorry. I didn't think it through. I didn't think I'll send you into a panic attack."

"I forgive you." I say. "I'm glad you're back. I missed you."

He smiles. "I missed you too."

I move closer to him and hug him. He wraps his arms around my body and hugs me, tightly.

"Don't ever leave again." I whisper.

"I won't." He promises me.

We hug for a moment later until he tells me I need to sleep. I lay on his chest and listen to the soothing sound of his heartbeat. The sound that makes me feel safe and secure. My eyes close on its own as I fall into a peaceful dream.

Just like the day before, my alarm goes off and I realize I'm laying on my pillow instead of Hayes. I look to where he was sleeping and see the note he left behind.

I'll see you soon.

I get up and start to get ready for the last day of the week. I put my hair into two braids and put my black school shoes on right before the knock on the door comes.

I reach for my bag on the ground as I stand up from my bed. I open the door and frown in confusion when I see James standing in front of me.

"James? What are you doing here?" I ask. "I thought Hayes would came to get me."

"He just got back from his trip. He still has jet lag. He told me to tell you he will be with you after school ends to take you to the mansion."

I nod. "Okay. Thanks for telling me."

I walk out me room, shutting the door. We walk over to the school and I pray the day will go by fast. I don't think I can handle being here anymore. I try my hardest to ignore the whispers and stares and pretend like everything is fine but I knew it's not. They know it's not.

Lily told me not to worry about it but I can't help it. It's constantly on my mind and I want it to go away. I need it to go away. Being away from this place for two days, is better than nothing. At least I won't have to hear anything. I won't have to see their faces of uncertainty. I don't have to worry about if they believed me or not. I can get away from all of it for those two days.

Lily doesn't even wait until we're alone before questioning me about last night. Once she sees me, she begins to shoot out questions left and right.

"What happened? Are you okay? Did you get a nightmare? Are you fine?"

I interrupt her. "I'm fine, Lily." I lower my voice when I few students walks by us. "I thought Hayes was him. He scared me but I'm okay now."

She nods her head. "That's good. I thought you were in some kind of trouble."

"As you can see, I'm perfectly fine."

"I guess it makes it better now that Hayes is back, right?" She says as we walk to our lockers.

"It makes a difference." I agree, opening my locker.

"Have you thought about what Mallory said?"

I grab my book and shut my locker. "No." I shake my head. "I haven't."

"I think you should consider it." Lily tells me as we head to our first period.

"I have when she first mentioned it but lately I haven't thought much of it. For the past couple of days, I've been thinking about what to get Hayes for his birthday."

"Whatever it is, I'm sure he'll love it." She shrugs. "It's you. He'll love whatever you give him and eve if you don't give him anything, he'll understand. He won't hold it against you."

"You're right."

Hayes doesn't care about gifts. He grew up in a guardian lifestyle. Gifts weren't the priority in that life. He had another things to worry about and so did the others.

Another reason why I want to do something for all the guardians. I'm not sure what I'll do but it'll be something to show how appreciated we are for them. Spoil them with gifts they never received in their life. I want to make a whole day out of it but I don't think Abe will go for that. I need to warm him up to the idea.

The first half of the day goes by kind of slow but it starts to move quicker the second half. Mr. Dean walks around the music room, listening to all the different kind of conversations happening.

We figured out what kind of genre we wanted to the play to be and now they are trying to figure out what kind of songs they want to be apart of the musical. There's a conversation about each of the genre they picked earlier this week.

I sit on the stage, half listening to Lucas' group speak about their topic love. He couldn't pick another topic like comedy or drama?

"It can be something like the girl has to choose between her family or her lover." Rachel suggests. "And she choose her lover."

"Seen it and done it before." Mike says. "We need something new."

Ashley looks up at me. "What do you think, Millie?"

I sigh. "I don't know." I shrug, uninterested. "What about the girl feels like she doesn't deserve the guy because she feels like she doesn't belong there with him."

"That sounds pretty good." Lucas says.

"Then the plot twist happens." Becca chimes in. "The boy gets put under a spell and is in love with the villain and the girl realize she does belong."

"That's actually a great idea. We can have two songs instead of one. The first song can be about the girl splitting from her group of friend but they know they'll always be there for each other. The second song can be at the end and they all end up sticking together."

"I like where this is going." Mike says, nodding his head. "It won't be all lovey-dovey like it was last year."

"How 'bout the guy needs recusing instead of the girl this time?" Ashely suggests.

"I think we can work with that." I reply. "It'll be something new."

We continue to talk about other ideas we can incorporate into the play and it's starting to get somewhere. Before I leave, Mr. Dean calls me name and I glance behind me.

"I heard that you didn't want to be in the play. Is that true?"

I nod. "Yes, it's true."

"Why's that?"

"I already did so many things. I had majority of the solos last semester and I thought it will be better if I give someone else an opportunity to be in the spotlight."

"That's very selfless and generous of you." He says. "I hope you will still write the songs."

I nod. "Of course! I already have a few in mind we can use."

"That's great. I'll need them in about two weeks so we can start the auditioning. Here's the list of the characters and notes about each one of them and the general summary of the play." He hands me the paper. "Just in case you need it."

"Thank you. This will come in handy."

We say our goodbyes and I walk out the room. I head down the hall and out the front door where the black SUV is waiting. Hayes is standing beside the car door and once he sees us he walks over to us.

"Thanks for taking care of Princess Millian while I was gone." He tells James.

"It's not a problem." James replies. "Anytime you need me, I'll help."

"Bye, James." I say as I'm getting in the car. "And thanks again."

He simple nods his head and walks away. I'll have to say James matured a lot over the break. He seems more serious and alert now. Hayes puts the car in drive and we are on our way to the mansion for two days.

Half an hour later, we arrive and I step out the SUV. Instead of going to my room, like always, I go into the living room. I pull out the paper Mr. Dean gave me before I left.

I sigh. This thing about doing this, I have to sing and I don't think I'm quite ready for that. But, I don't really have a choice. Mr. Dean gave me a deadline. I have two weeks or less than that to have these songs prepared for after the audition.

Once they figure out who's going to be in the play, they will start working on the songs right after. It's going to be fast paced because we have a short amount of time to get everything ready for the performance.

I can't begin to write for the play until I listen to Mallory's advice and write my feelings down. Maybe, hopefully, it'll help and I can start moving on.

I move the sheets of paper to the side and grab my notebook and pen. I open to a clean page and think about what I want, need, to say.

I think about how I was in my darkness but somehow there was always this small light, guiding me back. I would ignore it for awhile, thinking it was just my own imagination but it wouldn't go away. It was always there, waiting for me. It didn't care how long it had to wait for me to come closer and get out of the dark. It was patient and I was grateful for it.

That light was Hayes. It still is him. He's always there for me and he always pulls me out of my dark waters. That's when I realize I can write about him and it can be one of his birthday gift.

I get into my writing zone and I only stop when the person I'm writing about comes to sit beside me. I quickly close the book, hoping he doesn't see what I wrote.

"What are you doing?" He asks.

"Just writing. Mallory said it'll help me."

He arches an eyebrow. "Mallory?"

"She's my therapist Mrs. Kovok hired." I inform him. "I only saw her once and I figure it wouldn't hurt to at least do what she advised before I go see her again."

"That's great that you're trying." He glances at my notebook. "Are you writing something I don't know about?"

I shake my head. "No. Everything that I wrote, you already know and if you don't, I'll tell you." I pick up the notebook. "But this one, it's special to me and I'll show you it when it's ready."

"It's nothing bad, is it?" He asks, jokingly.

I roll my eyes. "It's nothing like the Halloween Bash, I promise."

He smiles. "Good. You really hurt my feelings. Not that I didn't deserve it but still."

"I shouldn't have said these things without knowing the full story. I was just hurt at the time but you have to admit it was one hell of a song."

"I'll be honest, it was."

I stand up. "You'll like this one."

"Then, I can't wait to hear it." He say, standing up too.

I grab my stuff and we walk to my room so I can put my things up. I'm heading toward the door to leave when Hayes grabs my hand, stopping me in my tracks.

I frown when I look back at him. "What?"

"We need to talk."

The last time he said that, he was leaving to Europe for a week. I can't imagine what he wants to drop on me this time.

"About?"

"Why didn't you tell me, people were talking about the trial, about you?" He asks. "You told me everything was fine. Why'd you lie?"

I exhale.

James must've told him. I told him not to tell Hayes about me crying. I never said anything about the conversations that are making its way around the school.

Instead of answering this question, I change the topic and switch it to him.

"It's not like you were being exactly truthfully either. You lied to me too."

His eyebrows furrows together in confusion. "What did I lie about?"

"Europe." I reply. "You said Abe sent you there but I asked him and he told me you went on your own."

"I never said Abe sent me there. I told you, it was Abe's order I couldn't tell you why I was going there."

I cross my arms in front of my chest. "Well, you made it sound like it was a mission from Abe."

"It wasn't. I might've not told you the full truth but I didn't lie. Yes, I went to Europe on my own."

"Why?" I ask. "Why did you have to go to Europe?"

"Personal reasons. Reasons that doesn't concern you. If I wanted you to know, I would've told you."

I'm not going to lie, I'm stung by his words. He doesn't trust me enough to let me in. He doesn't trust that whatever his reasons for going there, I can keep.

"Glad that's all cleared up." I reply. "And just so you know, the same goes for you. If I wanted you to know why they were talking about the trial, I would've told you."

I turn around and walk out the room, leaving him there. He's keeping secrets from me and I don't know why. He isn't going to tell me. My only option I have left, is to figure it out on my own and confront him about it. I just have to remember why I have feeling I know something very important about Europe and then I'll have everything I need.

I have no clue where I'm going. I walk around the mansion, trying to clear my head. I don't want to be angry at Hayes. I really don't but he's not making it any better. If he would just tell me the truth, then we can get somewhere. Why's he being so difficult?

At dinner, I ask Lily if I can stay in her room.

"Of course." She says. "Did you and Hayes have an argument?"

I sigh. "I don't know what to call it."

"Well, you can stay in my room and if you want we can talk about it."

I nod my head. "Okay."

I go to my room after I finish eating and get ready for bed. I take my shower and do my nightly routine before heading out. I'm making my way to Lily's room when I ran into Hayes.

He looks at me. "Where are you going?"

"You don't have to worry about sneaking into my room tonight. I'm going to sleep in Lily's room."

He exhales. "About what I said earlier, I didn't mean for it to come out like that."

"But that's what you're trying to say anyway. It doesn't matter how you intended it to be, it's all the same."

"No. Millie, listen. I..." He stops. "Nevermind it doesn't make a difference." He walks away, leaving me this time.

I head to Lily's room and she's on the bed, drawing. I come beside her and takes one look at me before she stops drawing. She doesn't ask but I know she wants to know what happened so I fill her in.

"What if it is nothing?" She asks. "I'm sure it was something dangerous or concerning, he'll tell you. I'm not choosing his side but I don't think you should worry about it too much. Maybe when he's ready he'll tell you."

"Maybe." I repeat.

She continues to comfort me but I can't help but to feel, she knows more than I do. I mean the day before Hayes left, she had seen something at the dinner table. Was it possible that it was the reason why Hayes went to Europe?

No, it can't be that. She would've told me, right?

As I lay on my side, looking at the wall, I think about why they would keep a secret from me. Maybe they are right. Maybe I don't need to worry about it but I feel like it's something I have to worry about.

It's an unsettling feeling in my guts; one I felt before.