Chapter Four

We have one more day before school started again. The people who left to be with their families over the break are now returning back to the mansion. The buses are arriving to take the students to the school now that it's safe to return.

Lily and I are staying and ride over to the school in the morning. Mrs. Kovok wants to talk to us before we go to class. I think we already know what's it about but she insist that we still go into her office as soon as we get there.

"Hey, Millie!"

I turn my head to see Laura and Danielle walking over to me, holding a gift bag. They're smiling. I haven't seen them since my birthday party.

"Hi." I greet them.

"We have something we wanted to give you before we got on the bus." Laura says.

"It's not much but we thought you might like it." Danielle tells me as she hands me the bag.

"You two didn't have to get me anything but thank you."

I take the paper out the bag and reach inside to grab the box. They smile, hugely, as they watch me open the box. This must've been what Lily was referring to when she said they had something for me.

I open the box and gasp. It's a bracelet and on it, is a full moon with stars surrounding it. It's beautiful. I look at Laura and Danielle.

"I love it!" I say. "Thank you so much!"

I hug them both and Danielle puts the bracelet on my left wrist for me. It goes perfectly with my moon necklace. The necklace I got separated from during the time I was in the hospital. Abe didn't tell me when I could get it back. He fears that being connected to the necklace, I can do damage with it. My emotions aren't trustworthy during my time of healings as he puts it.

I don't blame him. I don't even trust myself. One moment I feel like I can smile and it's true but other moments, I want to disappear into my dark place and get away from everyone.

Marie told me anything could trigger the state they don't want me to be in. Anything that looks familiar to that night or the smell or sound. Something so simple, can cause a big reaction. Wearing the necklace, I can make anyone feel exactly what I felt and that's not a good thing.

Two days ago, at the school when I heard about the trial, I got scared. The snow around me froze in mid fall and that's without my necklace. Imagine if I had my necklace with me. The whole area would've froze possibly even worse. I don't know and I don't want to find out.

I guess it's a good thing I don't have it. It's better far away from me than it is close by. Abe knows what he's doing and when the time is right, he'll give it back to me. I have to trust him.

As I walk through the garden in the back, I feel the cold air of Montana. It's been awhile since I felt anything. I'm starting to get use to it. Back in the state, I've known since I could remember, it was hardly ever cold. It had its day where on day, it would be deadly hot and other days it's beyond freezing. The weather there would change, unexpectedly but I loved the cold days.

I loved when it snowed while others would complain about it. It's just something about the cold, I love and I can't explain it. I wave at the guardians who kept an eye on me while I walk around. I hardly notice them most days but I'm glad they're around. They don't get the recognition they deserved and they should know how much we appreciated having them. They risk their lives everyday for the protection of ours.

Thinking of that, I get an idea. I need to talk to Lily about it first before I speak to Abe. I'm not sure how he will take it. What if he said, he didn't care about their job? They signed up for it so why should we praise them? I don't think Abe will think that but what if he does? What if he does think lowly of them? How will I change his mind to see how grateful we should be to have them here and spread out around the world for our people? Being a guardian isn't easy and a lot is at stake for them.

"Princess Millian?" One of the guardians on duty says. "You shouldn't be out here alone."

I guess I walked out of eyesight from them. Abe will have a heart attack if he can't find me. I understand that and I try to stay close at all times. Either I'm in my room or inside walking around. I never been outside on my own since the break started.

I give him a small smile. "Am I truly ever alone?"

"Bryan, I got her."

Bryan nods before walking away. I turn to see Hayes walking over to me, coolly.

"What are you doing out here?" He asks. "Aren't you cold?"

I shake my head. "No, I'm fine. I just wanted to walk around."

He raises an eyebrow. "Way out here?"

I shrug. "I didn't know I walked this far. We can go back."

"That will be better for Abe's sake." He agrees, nodding. "But there's something I need to tell you before we walk back."

I look at him, worried. "What is it? Did something happened? Is everything okay?"

He speaks before I can ask anymore questions.

"Everything's fine." He assures me. "It's about me. I don't want to leave you but-"

"Leave me?" I interrupt me, frowning. "Why are you leaving me?"

"I'm not breaking up with you, if that's what you're thinking. I make a promise to you, to stay with you until you realize you don't need me anymore and I'm not breaking that promise."

I remember that night when I found the letter he wrote me saying everything he wanted to say to me before he left. He told me he was scared to love but somehow he still loved me. He told me if I wanted him to leave, he would and he would wait for me. Back then, I knew I could never forget how much I loved him but I tried to convince myself I could. After I read his letter, I went to find him and I told him to stay with me because I didn't want him to leave. I never want that. I need him more than his thinks I do.

"Then what is it?" I ask.

"I'm going to Europe for a week." He says.

I frown in confusion. "Why are you going to Europe?"

"I can't tell you. I wish I could but I can't."

"Why not?"

He sighs. "It's Abe's order."

"When do you ever listen to what he says?"

"When he puts me under a spell." He replies. "I literally can not tell you why I'm going there."

"So, the only thing you can tell me is that you're going to a place somewhere in Europe?"

He nods. "Exactly."

Why would he go to Europe of all places? Something is wrong if he was traveling half way across the world. I can't ask Abe about it. He won't tell me even if I begged him to. I have a feeling I knew something about him going to Europe. It's on the top of my tongue. I just can't figure out why I knew anything about it and it's frustrating me. I wish it would just hit me already.

I decide to forget about it since I can't figure out what it is. I look at Hayes.

"I can't believe you're leaving me for a week." I say. "Especially now when I need you."

"I know." He responds. "I know it's the worse timing ever but it's important for me to go."

"But what about me? What am I going to do if I have a nightmare and you're not there to wake up from it? What if I go into my numb state? What am I suppose to do without you?" I question.

He reaches out to take my hand and pull me closer to him. He looks at me with his grey eyes and I glance away.

"I'll be back before you know it."

I can feel the tears welling up in my eyes. "You think that's supposed to make me feel any better?" I take my hand from his. "You don't understand."

I walk away, leaving him there and head inside. I'm confused and he can't explain anything to me to make me understand why he's leaving. I guess if I really want to know, I'll have to figure out myself. If I only knew what Europe had anything to do with this. On my way to my room, I try my hardest to remember.

Did I hear it somewhere before the break? Maybe in one of my classroom? No that isn't it. We never talked about Europe as far as I know. Maybe I had a conversation with someone about it. But why would I talk about Europe? I didn't know anyone from Europe. Did I have a dream about going to Europe? I never had a sudden urge to visit any places in Europe.

I sigh, frustrated when I reach my door room and I don't have a single idea why I knew something about Europe.

"Princess Millian, are you okay?"

I look up from the ground to see one of the maids, looking at me with a concern face.

"I'm fine." I tell her, opening my door.

I don't know how many times I will have to say that before I actually mean it. She nods and tells me if I need anything let her know. I tell her I will before walking inside my room and closing the door.

I stay in my room until Lily comes to get me for dinner. I know when she knew something is going between Hayes and I. I hardly look at him or spoke to me throughout dinner. She leans in close to me.

"What's going on?"

I move my fork around my food. "Nothing."

"Millie." She says.

I sigh. "Hayes is leaving for a week and I don't why. He can't tell me."

She sits up and stares directly at Hayes who's looking down at his plate. Reid nudges Hayes and whispers to him. He probably said something about Lily staring at Hayes because Hayes looks at her then at me. I look away and concentrate on eating.

Lily mumbles something about Hayes being stupid as she rolls her eyes. I never wanted dinner to be over so badly than I did right now but eventually it does and I immediately left the table and go back to my room.

Since I have to walk up early in the morning, I thought it will be a good idea to take my shower now than later. I have to get back on my regular schedule for school again. I take my shower and did my nightly routine before I lay on my bed, waiting for the moment I can close my eyes and sleep.

But of course, I can't sleep. I'm missing something. I'm missing someone. I don't know how long I stared at my ceiling before there's a soft knock on my door.

That has to be him, right?

I get up from my bed and walk over to the door. I twist the doorknob and I'm ready to pull him in until I see who it actually is. I try not to let my face show how disappointed I am when it's not who I thought it was.

It's the maid from earlier. The one who said to let her know if I needed anything.

"I'm sorry for waking up, Princess Millian." She says.

I shake my head. "It's okay. I actually wasn't asleep. Did you need something?"

"I have something to give you." She tells me, reaching into her white apron. "A young man asked me to give you this. It seems like it's important."

I take the folded paper from her hand. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. Good night, Princess Millian."

She walks away and I unfold the paper and I know in a heartbeat who's it from. I can tell from the handwriting. I read what's written.

Meet me in the piano room please. I have something I need to tell you.

I don't think about it twice before I'm heading to our secret place. I get so use to walking to the room that I don't even notice a few guardians walking around. I quickly go back around the corner before either of the sees me. I forgot Abe has them patrolling certain areas of the mansion.

I peek my head around the corner and see they're gone. I step around the corner, quietly, and continue to make my way to the room as secretly as I can.

I open the door and walk inside, finding him sitting on the piano, waiting for me.

"A little reminder of the guardians in the hallways would've be nice." I say as I walk over to the bench.

I haven't been in this room in days. The last time I was in here was when Hayes brought me here to play our song for me. Then, there wasn't any guardians we had to worry about.

"Sorry about that." He says as sit down. "They'll walk around in this area."

"And you brought me here so they can find out about us?" I ask, lifting an eyebrow.

He smiles. "I'll rather keep you to myself a little while longer before Abe kills me." He replies. "They know I'm here and they won't come towards this room unless it's important."

"So, we're good?"

He nods. "We're good."

"Great. Now that's out the way, what did you have to tell me?" I ask.

"Actually can we keep until the end? You haven't heart your song in awhile."

"You mean our song." I correct him. "And you're right, I haven't. Why don't you play it for me?"

"Right away, Your Majesty." He say with a small bow.

I smile as I nudge him, playfully. "Just play it."

He places his hands on the keys and not soon enough, the beautiful notes fills my ears and I can't stop the smile from forming on my face. It was incredible then as it is now. I still can't believe he created such an amazing music piece just for me.

As he plays, I remember what he told me that night I left my room and came with him here. He told me, he had something he wanted to show me on my birthday but he never got the chance to. He played me the same song and at the end, he told me to the name. It's called To Love's End because he said he was loving me to the very end. He wanted to bring me out of my dark place and he did. He always does.

Once the song is over, he drops his arms to his side before turning to face me. He stares into my hazel eyes.

I place my hand on top of his. "What do you have to tell me?"

He exhales. "I know you hate that I'm leaving and want to know the reason why I'm leaving but I have to go. It's for a good reason. I didn't bring you in here to tell you that. I have something to give you."

I arch an eyebrow. "You have another surprise?"

He grins. "This one will be more useful." He says as he reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a phone.

As soon as we got close to our remote place, Lily and I had to turn our phones in with no questions asked. I haven't be on social media in months and at first it sucked then I got use to it. I realized it was for our protection. I couldn't really post where I was without facing the outcome.

"It's untraceable." He informs me as he give me the phone. "You can call me whenever at any time. It doesn't matter if it's late or early, I will answer. I'll call you everyday and make sure you're doing okay."

I look at the small device in my hand. The only connection I will have with Hayes for a week. Holding this in my hand, makes it all real. He really is leaving in the morning.

"James will be with you while I'm gone and if something somehow goes wrong, he'll call me and I'll be on the first flight back to you."

"What if, I call you one night, really needing you?" I ask.

"I'll be on my way back. I need you to keep trying to be yourself and stay strong, okay?" I nod my head. "I promise you, I'll be back before you know it. I won't even stay the full week. I'll be back early."

"Don't give me false hope." I say, softly.

"I could never do that. I'll come back before I have to. I'll do that for you."

"Thank you." I reply, hugging him, tightly.

He wraps his arms around me. "That's the least I can do." He mumbles.

We stay in the piano room for a few minutes before going to my room. I still have school in the morning.

"Good night, Boo." He whispers in my ear.

I sleep, contently, enjoying the last hours I have with him. I'm not going to lie, I do have the nightmare but it only plays for a few minutes before the dream changes. Then the warmth, I feel from him is gone and I sit up, quickly. I look around my room and notice he's not there. He's gone.

He left without saying goodbye. He could've woke me up. When I think all is lost, I hear the sound of a car engine starting. I quickly throw the cover off me and go over to the window. I pull the curtain back and see him, stepping out the SUV. He goes to talk to one of the guardian and this is my only chance to see him before he really is gone.

I run over to my door and pull it open. I run down the hallway and down the stairs. I swing the front door open.

"Hayes." I breathe as he's getting back into the car.

He sees me through the passenger's window and he gets out. He walks around the car to me.

"Were you really going to leave without saying bye?"

"I thought it would better that way than waking you up." He answers. "I was going to text you when I got on the plane. That way you had something to read when you woke up and realized I wasn't there."

I shake my head. "That's the worse thing you could've ever think of. If I'm not going to see you for some days then I want a proper goodbye."

"I can do that." He tells me, nodding his head.

He brings me closer to his body and wraps his arm around me to hug me as he kisses my forehead.

"Goodbye, Boo." He looks at me. "Is that better?"

"Better than your idea but still not good enough."

He cocks an eyebrow. "What's good enough for you?"

There's only one thing that will make it better yet I'm not sure if I should do it. What if I think of him instead of Hayes? What if I think of that night instead of focusing on Hayes? All these what if's and I won't have my answers until I try. He told me to try to be myself and I'm going to do that.

I stand on the tip of my toes and move closer to him. He realize what I'm doing.

"Are you sure?"

I nod. "Yes."

I press my lips onto his and try to forget the image of him out my mind. I focus on Hayes' soft, tender kiss. This is the proper goodbye I need. I lean back and smile.

"That's how you should say goodbye."

He smirks. "I'll remember that next time."

"Bye Hayes."

"Bye Boo." He mutters against my forehead after he kisses me one last time.