It was always so quiet.

Allura never heard a single noise inside of her little home anymore after that night. Not even from the auto shop that always seemed to echo up the stairway and shake the front door to the little place she used to love being inside of. Now, she sat on the ground in the shop staring out the front door as rain splished against the gravel and created this musty smell of sorts. In her hands she held the little bowl Shiro had given to her at the hospital. Her shaky fingers traced where the gold had fused the once broken pieces back together to form a new piece of art. Her blue eyes stayed fixed on the world outside of this hellish nightmare she would forever replay in her mind every time she would hear the sound of water tip tapping away outside.

She remembered the spine tingling fear that had hit her as she listened to the gravel crunch under the car wheels as it pulled in. She hated that car. She hated everything that monster owned. When she was in the tiny thing, he would always find a reason to touch her and feel her lips on his. When she refused, he would slap her and tell her she wasn't given a chance on this earth to disobey the people who held all the power.

Boy, was he wrong.

She slowly placed her hand onto the floor and used it to help her stand on her two shaky legs. She hugged the bowl to her chest as she slowly stepped up to the door and stared into the darkness outside. She could feel her heart beating fast and hard in her chest as she imagined the feeling of the cold door handle in her hand from that night. She closed her eyes and took in a shaky breath as she turned around and began to slowly walk up the staircase, the palm of her left hand slid over the old rusty railing that helped keep her balance.

The door that allowed entry to her home was different now. Lindon had broken it when he forced it open trying to grab her. She carefully opened the black door and stepped into the tiny home as she shut the door behind her. You wouldn't have ever guessed what had happened in this place. Everything was so neat and tidy, the lights lit up the cozy little home and everything seemed so eerily welcoming as if it were trying to erase the events of its dark past. The broom she had used that night had been changed out for a newer one and the old one was hidden away somewhere in the building to keep Allura from replaying the night in her mind.

She slowly walked by the table, remembering that exhilaration she had felt when she shoved it into her attacker's body. She had felt so powerful in the moments where she had been able to attack him even if she was fueled by adrenaline and fear from that night. Then she stopped just before the living room and felt her body go cold.

This was where she had been knocked unconscious. The beautiful vase that once occupied a place on their kitchen counter had been shattered on the side of her head taking her down instantly. It had taken away all of her energy. She slowly reached her free hand up to her ear and felt the tiny scar from where the glass had cut her. Her heart seemed to drop a little inside of her as her blue eyes moved down to the floor and followed the trail Lindon had taken to drag her to her room. The nail she had lost from trying to resist was still growing back slowly.

Her existence seemed to be rejecting the idea of going inside of her room as her body came to a stop outside of the closed door. She felt her legs begin to shake under her weight as she bit down on her trembling lip. She made it this far, she had to follow through. She wanted to move past this night, defeat the demon who had began to engulf her heart and mind in darkness. She lifted her hand up ad wrapped her fingers around the door knob and twisted it opened without giving herself a chance to think twice.

She took a cautious step back as the door groaned open to show the room she hadn't looked at in forever. Like the rest of the house, any evidence of her struggle had been erased and buried in her memories. The broken lamp was replaced like all the other objects that had blood on them, and her bed spread was brand new from the store. She reluctantly stepped into the room and stared at her bed.

The breath was sucked from her lungs as she replayed the moment he had thrown her onto her back in the bed. She stood above it, her free hand touching her lips as she felt disgusted at the things he had done to her as tears had slid down her cheeks, her weak pleas for him to stop never reaching him. Her stomach twisted into knots as the memories began to flood her mind without her permission causing her legs to finally give out on her. She knelt on the carpeted floor before the bed like some sort of twisted renaissance painting of a woman praying before her saviour. Tears stung at her eyes as she held the bowl tightly against her chest.

She didn't want to remember the pain she felt when he had forced her to accept him and his everything. She didn't want to acknowledge the bruises she had been given from his disgusting desires that had driven him to do something as terrible as what he did to her.  She didn't want to remember the feeling of his body against hers.

She began to sob uncontrollably, the bowl rolling off her body and onto the carpet as her hands shot up to her face to hide herself from the images that haunted her mind. She shouldn't have forced herself to do something like this so soon, it was ripping her apart and opening old wounds. Her nails dug into her scalp as she began to pull at her hair again, whispering words of denial to herself with nothing but the light of the moon and the pitter pattering of rain outside to keep her company.

She wanted to give up.

She was never going to be able to move on from this. To forget the nightmares she had of that night. She always woke up in a cold sweat with his face etched into her mind. When she felt two hands touch her shoulders she felt fear course through her body causing her to lash out and claw at the intruder. She cried and cried as she was pinned to the ground by someone she couldn't seem to recognize. Her heart felt as if it were to explode at any second as her hands were restrained.

"Allura," A familiar voice sounded causing Allura to calm down enough to finally get a good look at her attacker. "It's me, Shiro."

Relief flooded over her body as she stared at the one person who understood her. She loved him so much. He had stayed with her through the start of this problem and continued to stick at her side. He was her knight in shining armour even if it had a few dings in it. Her trembling lips slowly curled into a smile as her tears slid from her cheeks.

"I'm so sorry," she whimpered as her blue eyes settled on the scratch marks she left on his neck. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to... I swear I didn't want to hurt you..." She whispered as she held back the sobs threatening to take over her once more.

Shiro shook his head as he slowly  released his grip from her wrists and helped her sit up to face him. His wiped away her tears with his thumbs and carefully placed his hands on her cheeks. "I know you didn't mean to do it Allura, don't blame yourself for something you can't control."

Why was he so amazing? Why did he always show her that he was the most perfect person in this world for her? She didn't understand why he had chosen to love her  or continue to support her but she didn't want to ever lose him. Maybe he could make these things that haunted her disappear if he could change how her night had happened. Maybe.

She slowly leaned forward and kissed him, taking him by surprise as she tried to close the gap between their bodies as she continued to press her lips against his. His grey eyes were wide as she tried to undo his belt causing him to slap her hands away.

"Stop it," he said through each little chance she gave him while she fought against his hands. "This isn't going to make you forget, trust me Allura!" He shouted and this time managed to push her off of him.

She had thought that if she gave herself to him, things could be different. One good thing could cancel out a bad thing, right? That's how it should work. She wanted this. She wanted a full night's rest where she could wake up with the hope of a new tomorrow in mind. She wanted to be happy.

Why couldn't she just be happy?

She lowered her head in shame as she knelt in front of Shiro. He was right, if she had managed to do what the demon inside of her wanted, she would've only hurt the both of them. She felt regret knotting up inside of her chest as she began to cry again causing Shiro to pull her into his arms and try to calm her down.

Why couldn't joy be bought with money?

As she wept in her boyfriend's arms her eyes caught sight of something that hadn't been erased. A single drop of blood on her carpet remained there, frozen in time. Why was it that the little drop of red could make her feel slightly better? Had the demon inside already corrupted her more than she thought?

She wished for it to go away. She wanted the demon to go away. She didn't want to feel joy when she remembered hurting that man or when she used violence to get rid of her stress. She wanted to be normal.

Normalcy and joy was all she could ever ask for now.

So this one was a BiT difficult to write if I'm to be honest. I wanted to somehow get Allura to try to heal by trying to get back to her room and not have PTSD or flashbacks to that night but the chapter evolved into what it is now and I'm not sure how I feel about it to be honest.

What's your opinion?

If you guys don't like it I'll rewrite this since I didn't put too much effort into this chapter. lEt me know how you feel and sorry for mistakes, I can't type on a phone for some reason :')

PS: I've been seeing a lot of new readers recently so I'd like to know how all of y'all found this story if you wouldn't mind answering.

-Anri