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❝ He said to "be cool" but I'm
already coolest. ❞

•••

CHAPTER FORTY SIX

IF LOVE WAS ENOUGH THERE WOULD'VE BEEN NO REASON TO fight for anything, to fear anything but death. Though, the reality is far bitter love isn't enough. Love is pain, love is real, love is eternal, love is present, love is past, love is here, love is him. He is love. The definition of eternal longing, my home. My soul. For as long as I've known, Jeon Jungkook he's been my home, my shelter. And, if I could one day describe, how one man could mean so much to me, I would just say one thing in my defense, he was the first man to ever truly see me. He was there. And, sometimes even that is enough.

No, woman can ever walk on this earth, without ever being madly, and deeply in love with a man. Sometimes, she meets him, creates a life with him. Other times, he's just a vision, an illusion her mind creates for her, to associate with, so that she doesn't feel alone. Unloved.

For me, I've found the one. He's the forever I've been looking for. Now, only time can be our enemy, it's cruel, it's real and it's never fair.

    “Ivy—” Why is that whenever he says my name I feel divine, I feel alive. Shutting my eyes close to the symphony of his ragged breaths, I sweet surrender, to the wicked allure of his deft hands, that are tenderly tracing an unknown map upon my back. His hand is underneath my silk tank top, while his other hand tries to turn my face towards his oft-so inviting lips,“How can you be so close and far at the same time. Look at me, want me.”

My eyes widen, as I shake with a tremor when my husband, stares down at me, vulnerable, and bare, so I swallow and fake a chuckle,“That's not true. You don't know how much I want you. ”

“Did you not like it?”His question, is a lot more than just a question it's like an attack, not just upon me, but more upon himself. I could tell that the mere thought of me not wanting, scares him. It terrifies him,“Just tell me, ever since we came back home you've been distant you're faraway, I can feel you drifting. It's insane, I may sound paranoid but, Ivy I know something's wrong.”

Rising from the bed, he pushes me deeper and stares ghastly at me, his gaze fierce,“Tell me. Don't hide from me. Baby, talk to me.”

           “No—you’re perfect,” my voice cracks, it's weak and it sounds pathetic, as I touch his face, hold it between both my hands, my chest, presses hard against his chest, his knee digs deeper into my throbbing heat, as I close the distance between us, trying to breathe with him, his scent, after a deep breath, I speak, “We didn't use a condom, Jungkook, I'm not on the pills. You finished inside me. ”

If I thought my words would anger him, shaken him. I was wrong. The only thing I find perplexing  in the man lying underneath, is bewitched gaze, the dark gleam of his eyes baffles me speechless, turns my breath into a mess of gasps and, gulps when he very amusingly and darkly, pulls me further into his embrace, his arms surround me and his mouth consumes mine just for a brief moment, a hard peck.

“If this is the reason that you've been quiet than, I really hate my past self, more than anything now. I want a child with you, Ivy hell I want many children with you. ” His voice dropping an octave, Do you want kids with me?”

I lift his hand, the one with the golden band, the one he never took off, the one I did. Because, he never stopped believing in us, he never stopped fighting for us. Smiling, I place my lips upon his knuckles, kissing him tenderly,“I want it more than anything. ”

His eyes go impossibly dark, and for a second he stills. His breathing queases, and as something primal goes off within him. Something I've triggered, set ablaze.

“Strip.”

I'm numb, I'm quivering but I know by the tone of his voice he's holding by a thread. The desire that pools out his gaze is enough to have me reach for my tank top,  I'm not wearing a bra, so within a second my breasts are out they perk with desire, yearning for his touch, but I don't stop even when his eyes continue to trace them, worship them. Swiftly, my hands reach for my underwear, it's good that I decided to not wearing; any pyjamas tonight, it made it all the more easier.

My hands take my panties off as I stare with complete eagerness when he reaches forward and takes them away from my hand. I watch as he winds them around his wrist, before pressing them to his nose. His eyes locked upon me, he's enjoying this, he wants to unravel me. His action prove that he wants to show me, my arousal an answer. His reward.

“I'm going to make love to you, Ivy but this time I want you to know, that,  ” His fingers explore between legs, parting at the entrance, as he groan when finds it slick,“I am going to come inside you again, I'm going to do it raw. And I'm going to this almost everyday, until there's a baby inside you. ”

I bite my lips,  gasping with a plea, I want him now. I needed him inside.

“You are so wicked—-” I whisper, my face hot with shame, and want as he darkly chuckles, placing hungry kisses against my neck, my jaw.

“No. I'm just a man in love with his wife.”

Fuck—my heart.

Grinning like a silly girl, a teenager, I circle my arms around his neck,“And I'm just a woman in love with her husband. ”

TO BE CONTINUED

Author's Note:

Hi, I'm not sure how long I've written here, I kinda wanted to update and here's it. I hope you do enjoy it. I'm well, just busy with exams college and just my health. I hope all of you are doing well. 💜

Thanks for reading!