Megyn smoothed her ankle-length skirt down and glanced up at the mirror, where she stared at her reflection. She closed her eyes, imagining Tom coming out of the bathroom, wrestling with his necktie like he always did. In her mind, she smiled and chuckled, reaching out and turning the mess into a Windsor knot, then planting a quick kiss on the tip of his long, slightly hooked nose. Meg opened her eyes, causing the imaginary scene to vanish. Would his absence ever stop hurting?

A stupid need to prove she wasn't too tired. She was.

A foolish decision. She made her choice.

Too much rain. A slippery road. A downed tree.

Turn the steering wheel. Skid to a stop.

Right in the path of an oncoming tractor-trailer.

Grating metal, piercing glass. Blood...everywhere. A dead husband.

All of it, her choice. No turning back. No second chances. Just empty pain, dull nothingness, and a funeral. How she had survived it.......Only God knew.

Megyn's face contorted in anger as she picked up the hairbrush and threw it into the wall. A spasm of tears gripped her midsection and doubled over, crying out to God as she sank to the carpet.

Where were you? Why couldn't you save him and take me instead?

She struggled not to be angry at Him. It wasn't working. She was slipping. And if she was angry at God.....well, she might as well just accept she was going to Hell. Wasn't that the unpardonable sin; lashing out at God when she knew better? She couldn't go to Hell. If she did, then she would never see Tom again.

Lord, please take away this anger in my heart. I don't want anything between you and me.

A nudge on her arm made her look up. Her old cat, Dixie, stared up at her and released a tentative reow. Megyn smiled and scooped up the soft mass, burying her face in Dixie's warm fur. The cat purred and snuggled close to her chest.

"It's okay, baby," Meg crooned. "Mama's okay. She just misses Daddy." She stroked the kitty, remembering when Tom had given her the cat when they had just started dating.

Megyn sat the cat down and stood. She was going to church tonight no matter how she felt. It would be good for her.

~

Jake sat at the window table, his coffee untouched. The feeling was returning. The feeling that he was being hunted, chased. Maybe it was time to leave.

He had lived in many cities while running. Chicago, New York, Seattle, Houston, and now Charlotte. He always chose large cities where he could disappear. Where you didn't have friendly neighbors that cared enough to be nosy. But the thing was, he was starting to miss being cared about. Scratch that, he wanted someone to care.

His mom had cared once, taken him to church twice a week and baked him cookies. Mom things. But then she had gotten sick and where had that God of hers been? He had prayed, and God hadn't listened. That was it.

The bell on the door jingled, and lo and behold, in stepped that Megyn woman. He watched her as she went to the counter, and if he had been honest with himself, he would have admitted that she was the reason he was sitting in the little coffee shop. For some inexplicable reason, he wanted to see her, to argue with her.

"Mind if I sit here?"

Jake nodded and Megyn took her seat.

"You were missed at the Revival services."

He snorted and finally took a drag on his coffee. "By who? God?"

Megyn smiled. "And me."

He frowned. Was she hitting on him? Or just messing with him?

"It was a good meeting," she continued.

Jake raised an eyebrow. "A place where they sit around and talk about God? No thank you."

Megyn's expression grew serious. "He does care about you, you know. No matter what, He will always care."

He shook his head. "I've seen too much to believe in a caring God."

"That's a common argument: Why would a loving God allow the suffering and evil we see? He gives us free will, the power of choice. Without it, we would be robots, programmed to love Him and be good. But then it wouldn't be love, now would it?"

Jake rolled his eyes. "And that's a common response: It's all about free will. That's an annoyingly brief and extraneous answer."

"It doesn't have to be complicated to be true. 'Air exists' isn't complicated but we know it to be true because we breathe."

"Well, the fact of God's existence is a lot more complicated than that of air."

"Only if we make it. The song 'Jesus loves me this I know, for the bible tells me so," is very simple and to-the-point, but it's true."

Jake sucked in a breath and sat there.

Megyn sat her coffee down. "Would you consider going to church with me Sunday?"

He eyed her. "No."

"Why not?"

And so, Jake launched into another argument against Christianity. And Megyn rebutted. And so it went every week for two months. They would see each other at places around town and at the coffee shop. And every time, they would argue religion, doctrine, and creation, with the virgin birth and the resurrection sometimes thrown in for good measure. Jake would Google every argument he could find, and Megyn read books on Christian Apologetics and listened to RZIM programs whenever the chance presented itself. Then one day, a miracle occurred. Jake agreed to go to church with her.

"Might as well get it over with so you'll quit buggin' me about it," he growled.

Megyn smiled sweetly. "The service begins at 10:30. I'll pick you up at 10:15."

So, at 10:14 on Sunday morning, Megyn honked her horn and waited. The man that approached her car wasn't much different than the one she'd met. He had showered and shaved but wore ratty clothes and a stained t-shirt that showed his tats.

Megyn refused to grimace as he slid into the car. "Good morning."

Jake popped a piece of gum in his mouth and went to work on it. "I guess."

When they got to church, Megyn held her breath and steered Jake directly into the sanctuary, hoping that he would behave and not embarrass her. She pressed her lips together and closed her eyes, Megyn, that wasn't a very Christ-like thought. Pray that he'll meet Jesus, not avoid embarrassing you!

She smiled at Sister Levine and headed for her typical pew, trying not to grimace when Jake slid in beside her, chewing on his gum like a cowboy on tobacco. A few members stopped at Megyn's pew, curious about the stranger and generally friendly but distant. Jake chewed away at his gum, slouching and acting like a moody teenage boy. When Pastor David, a short, middle-aged man with an ample middle stopped to shake hands, Jake just stared at his outstretched hand and chewed away. Megyn smiled apologetically and resisted the urge to smack Jake upside the head.

As the choir began to sing, she closed her eyes and complained to God.

Megyn, he said, who are you doing this for? You, or him?

Megyn flushed slightly. Truth was, the main reason she stayed around Jake was because that was when she heard God's voice. Like an adrenaline junkie who kept jumping off of buildings, she did it for the rush. Before meeting Jake, she hadn't heard God's voice in so long. She got her spiritual 'rush' from being around Jake.

I'm sorry, Lord. I just missed You so much and thought being around Jake was the only way I could hear your voice.

She glanced over at Jake, who was glaring at the world in general with a vehemence reminiscent of Anakin Skywalker. And he stayed that way until the end of the service, when he proceeded to stomp out to the car behind Megyn.

"So, what did you think?" Megyn asked cheerfully after some time.

Jake scowled and stared out the window. What did he think? And what had happened in there?

His plan had been to go to church with Megyn and be as rude and worldly as possible so all the goody-two-shoes church people would be horrified and she wouldn't ask again. And he had been rude, but after ignoring the preacher's offered hand, something had changed. He had listened to the guy's sermon on the crucifixion...and been riveted. The guy hadn't just given the whole Jesus-died-so-be-good bit that Jake had expected. Nope. He had gone into gory detail, talking about the physical aspect. And it had rattled Jake.

So Jake just stayed quiet all the way to his apartment. When Megyn asked if he would like to go Wednesday, he accepted. And accepted, and accepted, until the next thing he knew, he had been going to church on a tri-weekly basis for almost a month. He couldn't get Jesus out of his head. So he went with Megyn and before he knew it, he was no longer skeptical about Jesus, His death, or His resurrection.

One Wednesday night after church, Jake couldn't sleep. All he could think about was the pastor's sermon, Be Still, and Know That I Am God. This God seemed to be speaking directly to him! Jake paced the floor at one in the morning, wrestling with...something. Finally, he looked up at the ceiling.

"Why?" was the most he could manage for several moments. "Why God? Why do you want me? Me?" He shook his head, trying to fight off tears. Someone out there loved him. He wanted what Megyn had, what that preacher had. So what now?

Be still, and know that I am God.

Jake laughed. Could it be that simple? "God, if You want me, You can have me. I believe all of that stuff about You sending Your kid to die like that. I don't understand it all...but I am so tired of being alone and miserable. I want You. Please, take me."

Something seemed to lift away from him, that dark, oppressing cloud that had covered him since Afghanistan. It was gone. And joy flooded him.

He laughed. "Thank you, God! Thank you so much!" He sat up, grinning from ear to ear. Call Megyn, that's what he had to do. He dialed her number and waited for six rings until she picked up, her voice sleepy.

"Meg, wake up, I've got something to tell you."

"Jake?" she mumbled. "You okay? You sound.....happy."

He laughed. "I'm better than okay. I'm saved!"

Megyn sighed. "That's ni...Wait, really?"

Jake laughed again. "Yep. Wake up, woman, I need to know where I go from here."

"I'll get you a Bible."

"Thanks. I'll let you sleep now. Bye."

After hanging up, he jumped up into the air, doing a fist pump and letting loose a war whoop. Life was wonderful for the first time in like....forever.

The next Sunday, Megyn held her breath as Jake climbed into her car. He was a completely different person than the one she had met in a little hole-in-the-wall coffee shop. He had shaved, showered, gotten a haircut, and wore new clothes. Jake grinned and grabbed Megyn in a big hug that made her blush. He guffawed. "Megyn, I feel so clean, so new! Where's that Bible?"

Megyn smiled and handed him a KJV Bible with his name on it, and he snatched it up. "Thank you." Then he proceeded to explain what had happened to him all the way to church. When they got to church, he told everyone that would listen that he had gotten saved, even grabbing the preacher in a bear hug.

Megyn smiled as the congregation sang the opening hymn, which, as God would have it, was Be Still My Soul. God had given her a new friend and given that friend new life. She had found peace over Tom's death and God had given her new purpose in life. Jake turned and smiled, the hymnal balanced in his hands, and Megyn smiled back. God was good.

A/N: I am continuing this story