Be Myself - Chapter Seventeen
Chat Noir jumped in the air from shock, and stumbled back into a nearby table, with Marinette's food on it. With a crash, the tray fell onto the floor, and the food went everywhere.
"Chat Noir!" Marinette and her mother said at the same time. Distracted, Chat Noir tried to comfortingly smile at them, and ended up slipping, and hitting his head hard on the cold floor.
As he struggled to remain conscious (when unconscious, he / Ladybug would automatically change back), Marinette sprung into action. Regardless of the pain it caused her, she moved as quickly as she could manage out of bed and grabbed Chat Noir's head.
"Mum!" Marinette called her, knees shaking from sudden strain. "Help me chuck Chat Noir in the bathroom! If he falls unconscious, he'll de-transform and reveal himself to the world!"
Sabine was quick to assist her, grabbing Chat Noir's feet and opening the bathroom door. They gently lay Chat Noir on the floor, then flinched and slammed the door shut as they saw a bright flash of light emitting from the bathroom. Sabine shut the door, and Marinette propped up a nearby chair against the door, so they'd catch anyone trying to enter the bathroom.
Marinette fell to her knees, utterly exhausted. Sabine carefully picked her up and carried her to the hospital bed.
"Marinette, dear... why would you do this to yourself?" Sabine asked her, sadly. Marinette looked back up at her, with her crystal clear blue eyes showing conviction and certainty, and said:
"I don't deserve to be here. I'm a failure to you, to the class, and to Paris. If I die it'll make everything better."
Marinette felt a pressure on her wrist and noticed a small bobble of red and black hiding in her sleeve. Tikki's presence always made her feel warmer.
She smiled gently and placed her opposite hand in her sleeve and gently tapped Tikki on the head with her thumb as a form of affection. "But recently, I've found that there are people who do care about me, despite the many reasons why they shouldn't."
Sabine hugged her daughter, both the girls teary-eyed and flustered with emotion. "Oh Marinette." Sabine said, trying to wipe the tears away from her child's eyes. "I'm so glad you've met people who make you feel this way. Keep them close to you."
She took a deep breath, and moved away from Marinette, holding her hands awkwardly.
"Marinette, I - I need to apologise to you."
"What? Why?"
Sabine opened her mouth to talk but was cut off by a loud SMACK coming from the door to the hallway. Sabine and Marinette glanced at each other before Sabine shook her head and continued.
"I - I was told that you had developed self-destructive habits. Chat Noir told me a few days ago."
"HE DID WHAT?!" Marinette yelled, angry at having her privacy be destroyed by someone she trusts. With an angry yell, she stormed to the bathroom - disregarding the idea that he's changed back and opening this door could reveal his identity to the world - and flung open the bathroom door...
... with no one in it.
Marinette spotted the only window in the bathroom open, angrily growled, and slammed it shut. As she went back into her room, knees once again shaking, Sabine started to talk again, while helping Marinette back into her bed.
"Instead of immediately talking to you about it, I only told your father-"
"You did WHAT??"
"Marinette - he's your father!"
Marinette grumbled but allowed her to continue. Sabine sat down at the edge of Marinette's bed, tears beginning to well up in her eyes.
"I only told your father about it. I planned on writing down what you'd been doing for the next few days and talk to you about everything at the weekend, so we could all have a proper discussion about it - but I waited too long. I'm so sorry - if I had said something sooner, then maybe... maybe you wouldn't have..."
Marinette's irritated expression quickly dissolved into a deeply concerned one, as Sabine let go of Marinette's hands to cover her tear-stained face with. Her body racked with sobs, Marinette tried to sit back up in bed to comfort her - but the past two sudden activities had completely exhausted her resolve and will-power, and the collapsed back onto the bed. Instead of hugging her mum, or rubbing her back, Marinette could only reach out and clasp Sabine's arm.
Marinette felt so useless, unable to do anything besides tap her mother's arm in comfort, and she was so far away only the tips of her fingers reached their destination. But with each light tap, Sabine's expression became more cheerful, and she slowly stopped crying. She turned back around to face Marinette and clasped her comforting hand.
"Thank you, Marinette." She said, smiling at her daughter.
Marinette smiled back, overwhelmed with joy at feeling like she finally helped someone as boring Marinette - when the moment was ruined by the hallway door bursting open.
"I see you're awake, Marinette!" The nurse walking into the hospital room said, with a cheerful smile and wave. Marinette awkwardly waved back.
"Okay, I'm just going to run your vitals now." The nurse said, giving Marinette a brief check-up, while ringing the nearby bell for the doctor. While checking Marinette, her other family members, friends, and Alya creeped into the room. Sabine inched away from Marinette while she was focused on the nurse, and briefed Tom, Gina, and Sylvie about what had been going on in the hospital room, and what she had been talking to Marinette about, prior to everyone arriving.
Alya hid behind everyone else, trying to merge with the corner of the room. The other girls deliberately ignored her and allowed her to feel alone and sad. Chloe and Belle inched their way in front of Alya, to try and block Marinette's view. Alya put up no fight, and just leant against the wall, tears in her eyes. Once the nurse finished checking Marinette, she smiled and handed Marinette a new tray of simple food.
"Here, Marinette. Please eat this, while I try and find your doctor."
As the nurse left, her family walked up to her - her friends (and Alya) respectfully hanging back.
Gina gave Marinette a hug, while Tom ruffled her hair. Marinette's hand shook as she picked up a metal spoon for some soup on her plate. She was utterly exhausted and could do nothing to stop the spoon slipping out of her hand. It clattered on the ground and made an incredibly loud noise.
Marinette flinched. "Oh no! I'm so sorry I-"
"No it's alright!" Sabine interrupted, picking up the spoon and laying it back on the tray. "I'll go ask the receptionist for another one. Sylvie, would you like to join?"
Sylvie threw a concerned glance in Marinette's direction, before nodding and following Sabine out the door. After a few minutes with no sign of the doctor or his wife, Tom also left to try and find either one, leaving the children by themselves, dragging Gina along with him.
By this point Marinette had fully broken down - she had pulled her knees to her chest and weakly rested her head on them. She clumsily tried to wipe away frustrated tears that left her eyes.
"Damn it..." Marinette muttered to herself. Her friends pretended not to hear her and let her retain her dignity.
Suddenly a knock on the door interrupted Marinette's musings.
"Uhh, come in!" She said, fiercely rubbing her tears away. The door gently opened, and Adrien shuffled in.
"Hey Marinette..." He muttered to her, unsure of how to talk to her as Adrien.
"Ahh - hi!" She scrambled and threw a response back to him.
As her friends fangirled over Marinette and Adrien - even Chloe - Alya tried to sneak out of the room, realising how maybe she should talk to Marinette once she's fully healed. Adrien's Chat Noir senses pick up the movement, and he spun around, catching Alya in the act of leaving.
"Alya! Why are you here?" He growled at her, reaching around and clutching Marinette's hand in an act of support. Marinette's anxious - afraid - eyes staring into hers is what finally broke Alya.
"I - I came to talk to you, Marinette." She said, tears beginning to roll down her face. "I was selfish, and arrogant, and too caught up in myself to realise what I was doing to you. I felt like you had shoved me aside for Chloe, and I was terrified of becoming a third wheel or something with you two, so I decided to push you away before you hurt me. I didn't realise how awful I was being until you... you..."
She wiped her eyes and looked away from everyone else in the room - ashamed.
"Once I realised what I had done to you - I just... I'm so sorry." She finished, unable to clear her eyes. She turned to walk out the door.
"Alya."
She turned back around, keeping her eyes pinned to the floor.
"It wasn't what you had done to me. What you did pushed me over the edge - but I probably would've ended up jumping even if you hadn't pushed me to do so."
Marinette sighed, thinking about what Alya said.
"I can see you truly mean what you say. I will give you another chance - but that doesn't mean I automatically forgive you. What you did really hurt me - regardless of whether you feel sorry or not. I'm happy for us to spend time together and chat again - but at least at first there will be a tenseness between us that will be both awkward and frustrating." Her eyes sharpened. "If you truly want to be friends with me then you will deal with it and persevere until the tenseness between us goes away."
Alya slowly lifted her eyes to match Marinette's. Watery and shining, she smiled at Marinette.
"Thank you so much! I'll do my best to prove how much I want to be a part of your life Marinette!"
"You can start by leaving her alone." Chloe bluntly interrupted. Alya flushed red and scurried out, muttering apologises as she left.
"Alya - wait!" Marinette called as Alya's head disappeared from view - before hesitantly popping back up.
"Thanks."
With a smile, Alya disappeared from sight once again, and left the hospital.
Marinette turned to Adrien, squeezing his hand tight. "Hey, thanks Adrien." She said, staring into his eyes.
"Oh, you're welcome." He replied, staring back at her.
After a couple seconds of silence and staring, Chloe said: "I can see you two have some things to talk about, we'll leave you in peace."
Before the other girls could protest, she grabbed Mylene's wrist with her right hand and Rose's wrist with her left. She gave Marinette a thumbs up as she left, and Marinette smiled back at her, incredibly grateful for the help.
Honestly, Marinette thought to herself, if me and Adrien were left alone six months ago, I'd have been a stuttering mess - I wouldn't have been able to talk to him properly. One month ago and I might have burst into tears. But now...
She smiled.
"Hi Adrien."
Adrien flushed red, and he looked up at her.
"Y - You're not stuttering anymore."
"No - but you are!" Marinette teased him.
With every passing comment they threw at each other, Adrien could clearly see the Ladybug part of Marinette shine through.
He knew she was his soulmate.
"Marinette - I need to talk to you about something - do you think the others will get here soon?" He asked her.
"Well prop up that chair by the bathroom against the main door, and then they can't get in without giving us warning." Marinette told him, not realising Chloe, Mylene and Rose were actually guarding the door and making sure no one was going to enter for a while. Since the door was shut, none of them could hear the interaction between the two heroes.
As Adrien grabbed the wooden chair to prop by the door, Marinette noticed with each step he grew more feverish and scared.
Whatever he's about to tell me - is going to be very serious.
Adrien sat down on Marinette's hospital bed.
"Look Marinette... I - I really care about you."
Marinette blinked. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. I... got so scared when I - I found out you were at the hospital. I was so angry and upset with myself." He looked up at Marinette and gave her a sad smile. "I almost didn't make it in time."
"What do you mean? Visiting hours don't end for another two hours!"
"No... I think you misunderstood Marinette." Adrien took a deep breath. "I almost didn't catch you from that roof in time."
Marinette paused.
Chat Noir caught her from that roof.
Chat Noir was found in her school by Tikki in a moment of crisis.
Chat Noir - Chat Noir was...
"You. You're Chat Noir?" Marinette whispered. Instead of replying to her, he held his hand out and said the words.
"Plagg, claws out."
As he transformed into Chat Noir, time seemed to slow down. Marinette could see each part of him change into the famous saviour Paris knows and loves.
"This is... crazy. You're really Chat Noir?" Marinette asked, shocked. While it made no sense, it also... made so much sense that it felt like the only thing that sounded logical. It explained so much.
"Hello, Milady." Chat Noir - no, Adrien - greeted Marinette.
Tears formed once again, in her eyes.
"You - you kissed me." She muttered to him. "I understand the hero Ladybug - but why kiss Marinette?"
"Because I love you, Marinette." Chat Noir said, taking her hands in his. He de-transformed, and tapped their foreheads together, leaning in for a kiss.
Marinette pushed him away.
"If we do this," She said. "If we become a couple - you need to know it won't automatically make me better. I'm still going to be insecure, weak, and sad. I'll do my best to help myself get better, but if you decide to go down this path with me, it will mean nights when I call you, too scared to sleep, emotional breakdowns, and more."
"I wouldn't have it any other way, Milady." Adrien comforted her. "As long as you promise you'll let me help you. I won't force you to feel happy, I won't force you to do what I believe is best for you. Unless your life is in danger, I won't take any drastic action against you. I'll make it so that you always feel comfortable calling me, talking to be about your problems, and spending time with me. I want you to be happy - but I want you to be happy on your own terms, and at your own pace. Do you promise that if we go down this path, you'll let me be there for you?"
Tears streaming down her face, Marinette smiled and nodded, wiping them away best as she could. Adrien wiped away some suspiciously tear-looking fluid on his cheeks, smiling as well.
He leant down once again, pressed their foreheads together and moved forward to kiss her.
Marinette didn't stop him.
Once they had their first proper kiss, symbolising the start of a new beginning, they entwined their hands, and beamed at each other.
"I promise."
IT'S FINISHED!!!!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
*Ahem*
I finally finished this story! I hope you all enjoyed reading it as much - or more - than I enjoyed writing it. It was so fun!!
Maybe eventually I'll write an epilogue for a year later or something, as I hate having an odd number of chapters, but for now the story will end here.
Thank you all for supporting me (and my completely random unreliable schedule) during all of this - your support means everything to me. You give me the courage and inspiration to continue doing what I love, and I couldn't thank you all enough for it.
My next steps are to continue writing Let me Live (sequel to For the Glory - a How To Train Your Dragon fanfic) and the random one I'm writing with my Wattpad friends.
This story was supposed to be only 10 chapters, then it rose to 15, now we're at 17! Just like our assumptions of ourselves, I expected less than what I received. Guys when you think: 'I can't do this', remember the body is more durable, and your soul is more strong than you think.
And with that, I'll leave you all. Thank you for reading!
For the final time:
But for now...
Peachy out! 😊
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