"Am I allowed...to ask just one thing?" Eren murmured as he kicked at the dirt below his shoe, his hands wrapped around the chains of the swingset where Levi sat right next to him.

"Mhm," Levi murmured, watching in the sunlight as the dust flew up from the ground.

"With this whole college thing, and you probably going away soon and all that...I just wanna know...where does that...um..." He swallowed hard and pulled in a deep breath. "Where does it leave us?" he barely whispered.

Levi's answer didn't come instantly. With each passing second, Eren's anxiety shot up and soon his knuckles were aching from gripping the chain so tightly.

"You're talking about last night," Levi murmured. Though it wasn't formed as a question, Eren nodded. Another long moment of quiet passed; Eren forced himself to focus on something, anything, but his growing uneasiness - the slightly uncomfortable way the swing curved beneath him, the heat of the sun as it beat down on his back...

"I guess that's up to you," the older finally said. "I'm gonna be the one who's leaving." Eren couldn't help his cringe at the word leaving. "If you don't want anything out of...heh, whatever it is, I won't blame you. I mean, shit's changed now..."

"Are you saying you don't?" Eren couldn't help but ask, lifting his head.

"No." Levi met his eyes evenly. "But if it'll make it harder on you later..." His sentence faded out and he shrugged, knowing Eren knew what he was getting at. Neither of them wanted to say it.

It was hard for Eren, being so used to getting close to people only for them to leave him again. It would hurt in ways he knew he couldn't even fathom if the same happened with Levi, and his first instinct was to protect himself from it. At the same time, however, his feelings for the dark-haired boy sitting a mere foot away from him were too strong to ignore. He felt an attachment to Levi unlike any other before, and a bigger, stronger part of his instincts said to hold him as tight as he could for as long as he possibly could, even if in the end it meant heartache.

"I guess we'll never know what happens, right?" he said finally, reaching over and threading his fingers between Levi's - not too intimate a gesture, just in case someone happened to be peering down at them from the door or an upstairs window, but affectionate enough that Levi, at least, would get the message. "Why waste an opportunity?"

Levi's eyes narrowed just a fraction; it was impossible to even guess what he might've been thinking past those stormy irises, but eventually he nodded. "I agree."

Eren's smile helped wash away some of the dread sitting in the pit of his stomach. "Okay. Then it's settled." He squeezed the other's hand for finality.

~

Over the course of the next several weeks, the two stretched their time out and made the most of each second as best they could. Eren did his absolute best to put to the back of his mind the fact that Levi would be leaving much too soon and instead focused on their unspoken promise from the swingset.

The hours upon hours they spent with each other during the day - downtime (which was most of the time), mealtimes where they'd purposely sit next to each other, any time they went anywhere as a 'family' - was spent with endless conversations about everything and nothing all at the same time. Levi would help Eren with his schoolwork where he could, and where he couldn't, would silently sit beside him and watch, or perhaps read his own book to keep himself occupied. The two would sit in the sunroom talking, playing with the cat and sometimes the dog; Levi would occasionally play the violin and let Eren hold it a few times and then cringing whenever he made a horrid sound with the bow. Very quickly, Eren thrusted it back at him and shook his head, never wanting to hear such a god-awful sound again.

And among all the hours spent together, talking and laughing (more on Eren's part than Levi's, though Levi couldn't deny to himself that he loved to make the brat laugh, especially after all he was learning about what he's been through), one of them climbing into the other's bed nearly every night, there was experimental kissing and affectionate physical contact laced in. It was awkward at first, what with the both of them being inexperienced and still trying to find things the other liked while learning about themselves in the process, but it was sort of grounding, for Eren especially. Feeling Levi's soft lips move along against his or press warmly to his skin, feeling his fingers in his hair or dancing around the surface of himself was the best distraction to the thing he wanted to be distracted from, anyway. And Levi loved it the same, cherishing every little sigh brushing past Eren's lips without him realizing it or the sensation of his quickened heartbeat. And it wasn't too fast or too slow for either of them.

To each, the other felt like home.

They couldn't deny they weren't particularly fond of the fact that they were forced to act normal around the rest of the household, but the moments when they weren't alone or were at risk of being caught, they cherished just the same. In those weeks, Eren found himself making memories he'd carry with him forever - simply sitting side by side in the living room while Marco was attempting to beat yet another one of his video games, giving Mikasa opinions on her drawings when she asked or helping the younger kids with their school work, or on the occasions where the family took trips together - the museum, the zoo, the mall, and the park. They would trail away from the group a little at times, and once at the park Eren raced Levi to the swings and made a bet of who could swing the highest. Levi tried his best but because Eren's legs were just a tad longer, he was able to swing higher; but for Levi, it was worth it, because the 'prize' was a kiss once they were alone together again, and he was all too happy to oblige.

Being with Levi was the happiest Eren could ever remember being, but as the days went on, his anxiety about the person who was becoming his salvation leaving grew inevitably stronger.

~

"I didn't know the library was next to a Baskin Robbins!" Eren practically gasped as the bus jerked to a stop just outside their local library where Petra allowed them to visit for a few hours so long as they were back no later than six.

"I didn't either," Levi murmured, leaning around him to peer out the window and see what he was talking about.

"Shoot. Now I want ice cream," Eren mumbled in a small pout as they stood up and headed toward the door. Once on the sidewalk, he turned to look at Levi, curious about why he hadn't replied, to see him shuffling through the small wallet he was carrying their bus money in.

"Bus fare is three dollars, right?" he asked, counting through the change the driver had given him after paying.

"Yeah, why?" Eren asked, trying to hide his growing excitement.

"Petra gave us twenty. As long as we have six left to get back, I think we can afford to share some ice cream."

A wide grin spread out across Eren's face but almost immediately faltered. "Do you think we're allowed to do that?" he asked. "Don't you think Petra might get mad?"

Levi rolled his eyes and started walking after the bus pulled noisily away from the curb. Eren automatically followed. "Have you ever known Petra to get mad about anything?" he muttered.

"Well, not mad, really. But she was really upset when Annie shoplifted from the amusement park."

"That's shoplifting, kid. And it's not like she told us to give her the change. It's just ice cream, anyway."

Eren pressed his lips together, still a little uneasy about it but still all too drawn to the little shop just steps away from the library.

"I won't tell if you won't, kid."

And how could Eren possibly say no to that?

After striding into the little sweet-smelling shop and taking what felt like forever to agree on a flavor and a topping, the two sat down with the little purple cup of cookie dough ice cream between them, Eren already ogling over the sprinkle-dusted dessert. Still, under the table he hooked his leg around Levi's, something he did when he couldn't hold his hand, before he even dug in.

"We have enough left to get back, right?"

Levi held up the five and two ones he held before sticking it back in the wallet and pocketing it. With that, Eren happily dug in, not even trying to hold back his moan of delight.

Just watching the bliss on his face, Levi's heart warmed a little more before he, too, scooped a bite into his mouth. He wasn't the fondest of sweets, but being with Eren and making him happy was his main goal for the moment, so he humored him by eating it (despite the fact that, in the end, he let the kid have most of the treat).

Once finished, the two sauntered back over to the library hand in hand, Eren happily walking along beside the other. He started to swing their hands between them, smiling, but Levi tugged him back, shaking his head but not without a sparkle of amusement and affection in his eyes.

The sort of musty scent of books greeted them at the door. As libraries are, the inside was quiet with a few hushed whispers here and there, the humming of a printer, and fingers clicking away at keyboards. There were check out computers and a small reception desk in the center of it all and tables where featured books were put on display.

Automatically, Eren weaved into the aisles without particularly caring what genre he was in. His eyes skimmed briefly over the titles while his hand was stretched behind him, tugging Levi along.

"So did you come here to wander around or actually read something?" Levi mumbled.

Eren shrugged. "I dunno. I just wanted to leave the house for a while with you, and I know you like books, so..."

The raven huffed and shook his head. "Dork," he muttered. Eren merely cast a smile over his shoulder.

Eventually, the two settled down in side by side beanbag chairs in one corner of the building with a pile of different books they'd picked out from all over the shelves that had caught their eye. Eren dragged one of the chairs over to be as close as physically possible to Levi and ended up leaning over onto his chair anyway.

None of the books in their pile caught their interest, so they were back at it. After two rounds of this, Eren sighed and muttered, "Screw this. I'm gonna go find some I-Spy," before standing up and wandering off again. He returned with six -six - different I-Spy books and plopped back down, setting the pile between them and picking the first one in the stack up and propping it on their knees.

"Sometimes I wonder if you're actually fifteen," Levi mused.

"Why?"

"Because you act so damn childish sometimes."

Immediately, the brunet's face fell. "Oh..."

"I didn't say it was a bad thing," Levi countered, leaning over and pressing a kiss to his forehead.

As quick as it had vanished, Eren's small grin returned and he quickly lifted his chin to catch the other's lips with his own instead. Levi grinned just a little, gently butted his head against Eren's, and then turned his attention back to the book.

Eren flipped the cover open and allowed Levi to flip through the first few pages as he said, "My mom and I used to do these all the time when I was younger. Ya know how they have books in the dentist office and stuff? Mine had these, and she'd always distract me from my nerves with one of them. I loved them so much that she bought me one for my seventh birthday."

Levi arched a brow. "Lose it or something?"

"...I guess you could say that," Eren hushed. "I lost it when I moved into my first foster home."

Levi merely hummed. "So we're looking for these?" he said, pointing at the words at the bottom.

Eren nodded. "A green candle," he read off, and their search commenced.

It took several hours to get through all the books they had in the library. Eren insisted upon finding every single thing in the lists despite Levi's grumpy protests, but he let Eren have his way with it anyway. Before they knew it, the sun was much closer to the horizon and Levi's head whipped around to the clock.

"Shit," he hissed. "It's quarter to six. We have to go."

Eren looked up, too, and then they were scrambling to put all the books away and practically sprinted toward the bus stop. Levi anxiously tapped his foot on the sidewalk as they waited for the next bus to come around the corner, and when it did, it couldn't have pulled away from the curb fast enough once they were on, paid for, and seated.

The two burst into the house after sprinting down the street and through the yard, absolutely breathless, seventeen minutes after six.

Petra emerged from the other room a few seconds later, a hand on her hip. As soon as he saw her, Eren immediately bowed his head and managed past his panting, "S-sorry, Petra...we...we lost track of time..."

"Took a few minutes for the bus to show up," Levi added. "We got here as fast as we could."

Surprisingly, a small smile spread out over Petra's rosy lips. "I suppose it's alright. You're not that late, and you obviously understand you made a small mistake, so don't sweat it."

Eren's head snapped up as Levi nodded. "Thank you," he said.

"You made it back for dinner, at least," the woman said. "Come on and wash up, it's almost ready." She nodded them back before heading in the direction of the kitchen, leaving Eren to cast a breathless smile of relief at Levi.

~

That night, Eren was the one to abandon his bed (letting Zoe curl up in the center of it) for Levi's, pressing up against his side with his head tucked against the other's shoulder, drawing nonsensical patterns on his arm while they laid in silence. It'd been a while since either of them said anything, and Levi's breathing was slow and even so Eren couldn't be sure of whether or not he'd fallen asleep yet.

In the silence with little to distract him, Eren's anxieties about Levi's closing in departure pushed their way forward as they often did in situations like these. He imagined the room to be empty of Levi's things the way it was for the first month he'd lived with Petra and it left a heavy ache in his chest. He thought of how nights would be quiet and lonely again, how he would no longer wake up to the sound of the door in the sunroom opening to find Levi slipping through to join him. He thought of how there'd be no more blanket forts (it was no fun to make one alone) and no more subtle gestures in the presence of others, no more nights of cuddling such as this, no more kisses, no more, no more, no more...

Eren was pulled from his thoughts when Levi pulled his arm away and shifted his weight a bit before slipping his hand into Eren's.

"Oh. You are awake," the younger whispered.

"Mhm," Levi hummed. "You're tense as hell."

"What? Oh." Eren worked on relaxing himself. "Sorry."

"Tch."

"Want me to move?"

"No."

"...okay." Eren swallowed and snuggled just a bit closer, closing his eyes. "Um, Levi?"

"Hm?"

"Uhm...nothing. Just...thanks."

"For what?"

"Today. The ice cream, and the library...it was fun."

"Sure. Now what is it that you really wanted to say?"

Eren lifted his head, eyes opening to seek out Levi's in the dark. When he met the other's shiny irises he immediately looked away and rested his head down once more. "I'm that easy to see through?"

"Like glass," retorted the older. "So?"

Eren sucked in a deep breath, keeping his eyes fixed on the desk near Levi's bed. "I just...was wondering something."

A beat of silence, and then, "Wondering what?"

"About you."

The raven sighed. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, Eren."

"I do. I just don't know how to say it."

Levi merely waited. It took a few long moments for Eren to muster up enough courage to finally blurt it out.

"Are you scared to go to college?"

Levi snorted. "That's what you were so scared to ask?" Involuntarily, Eren shrunk away a bit. Feeling this, Levi relented and tightened his hold on the other's hand, a silent way of telling Eren he still didn't want him to move. "Yeah, a little," he whispered. "But it's also nice to finally have something to look forward to so I can start being independent and get the hell out of the foster system."

Eren forced away his selfish emotions, shutting his eyes to deny the tears he could feel surfacing, and nodded. "I understand," he barely whispered. "Does that mean...you've decided where you wanna go?"

"Not quite. Petra says I only have a few more days to decide, too."

Eren nodded again and curled up a bit, putting just an inch of distance between himself and the other warm body he'd been pressed up against. "I'm sure you'll pick the right one for you," he said in a small voice. "The one that makes you happiest." Even if it means leaving me forever.

All Levi managed was a small "yeah" before it fell quiet once more. Truth be told, he had a feeling he knew which school would do just that for him. He knew which one held the most opportunity for what he wanted, and because of his scholarship and such, money wasn't really an issue - at least for the first few semesters. The issue lied with Eren - did he have the guts, the heart, the capacity to leave this kid who'd brought more light into his life than he'd experienced maybe ever? Was it worth it to go to a school so far away and leave this kid behind, just because they were said to have one of the best music programs in the state? How much would it tear each of them apart - Eren because he'd been left behind by so many people he cared about in the past; Levi because he'd just be another one of those people to add to the list and because Eren was such an integral part of him now - when he left?

Levi chased himself around in circles with these questions, an ongoing war waging inside his mind that he was still no closer to a solution for.

---

Guys, if you ever find a mistake in my writing - a weird sentence or a grammar/punctuation error or whatever - please tell me. Thanks! ;*♥