Jeremy Gets a Girlfriend: Part 4

Michael stormed out of the bathroom and stopped for a moment to catch his breath. He held his hand over his mouth so that Jeremy wouldn't hear the sobs that nearly escaped his lips. He didn't want to hurt Jeremy...it hurt him so much to see him like that...like that for him...

Michael knew that Jeremy loved him, which is why he had put such confidence in his words. However, part of him started to doubt himself and he began to turn back to open the door to the bathroom. He wanted to throw himself into Jeremy's arms and tell him that everything was alright, that no matter what he'd always love him and that this was just one of those single moments in time that would blow over eventually, and that they were still them and that's all that mattered. That it didn't matter if they were the only ones who knew about her love, as long as they loved each other, that was it, and that was enough, that was...that wasn't enough. Michael had always been about pride in himself since he was a kid. Pride in what he loved and who he loved. He took no shame in his retro hoodie, with his PacMan and radio patches, and he sure as hell didn't take shame in his rainbow patch. Though, most people assumed it was for 'decoration' it was obviously a hint to all the homosexual guys at school. Thankfully Jeremy had caught onto that hint.

He reached his hand forward to turn the knob, touching it. Then, he released his grip and turned back around, what was the point? He'd just basically dumped Jeremy and he wasn't going to let him win. He needed to fix this by himself and needed to earn Michael back. He stated walking towards his third period class when the bell rung, and he switched directions to his fourth period in time to see Jeremy stumble out of the bathroom, blending in with the crowd best he could, wiping his face dry for extra precaution. Michael felt his chest tighten at the sight and forced himself not to go over to him and hug and hold him, for all of eternity would be nice. But he did nothing as Jeremy went past him, so much in his own thoughts he didn't even notice that he brushed against Michael.

Michael let out a sigh of sadness, proceeding forward until he finally reached his science class. Heading through the door with his heart like a stone in his chest.

***

As the lunch bell rang Michael felt as if the end of the world was coming. He wanted so badly to be able to sit beside Jeremy and secretly hold his hand, to hear the little squeak noise he made whenever Michael's hand made contact with his, to be able to look over and see his face turn red but him act like nothing was different, when everything was.

He had to force himself out of his seat and head for the classroom exit, briskly walking towards the cafeteria. If he got there first then he wouldn't have to worry about finding a place to sit, he could sit at him and Jeremy's usual table- and Jeremy...Jeremy could do whatever he so pleased, it's not like he was his problem anymore. He'd probably sit with Christine and tell her how when she cries his name it's 'tragically wonderful' yeah, that was probably just some crap he used to lure people into loving him back...it had all just been one joke and Michael had been the victim. Jeremy had never loved him, he'd always loved Christine, of course he had! Why had he been so blind? Why hadn't he just said no? Why couldn't he have just left Jeremy alone in that bathroom at the Halloween party instead of him? And why...why couldn't he stop loving Jeremy?