21 || BONUS EPILOGUE
There was no mistake when Ying said that the cave systems weren't far off from where they were. All they had to do was to pound through the snow like how they normally would have. Lucky for them, BoBoiBoy isn't feeling much pain anymore like how he should be. Yaya, however, is a different discussion. At this point, her only medicinal comfort can be the warm flames from the burning forest trees.
They wade through the thick weather without even turning back. Not once. No one wants to look back to those horrors again.
Apparently, the cave system is dark. The tunnels thread for what seems like miles on end, coated by ancient pieces of brick and old bundles of moss. Once they trace its features with their keen eyes, they see iron lining its walls.
Soon, they see there's some on the floor too. Yaya learns this the hard way when she almost trips on large wooden slabs.
"W-W-Woah, Miss Yaya! Are you okay?" Fang catches her before she even falls flat on the rails.
"Yeah, I'm fine," she puffs. Most of them are actually surprised she isn't too hurt from the arrow wound by her leg. But Ying knows better.
She's played tag with her for years and lost to her even when she had a behemoth splinter in her ankle.
They were kids. They were kids, hearing each other's stories, eating potatoes with prickly plants by the fire with their mothers.
Their mothers.
They need to go back home.
"How long do you think this cave is, Gopal?" Ying asks.
"Honestly, no idea. But I have a clue where we are."
"Where?"
"Guys, I can see rails on the g-ground," Fang stutters also from the cold. "We must be in one of those...p-pr-prehistoric transportation routes. I think this is where...t-t-trains used to go."
"Well," Gopal blows a raspberry. "I dunno what in the world trains are, but they don't look as nice as I thought they are."
"At this time, Mom and Aunty should have gone to migrate about now. Could the site be that far from here?"
"Migrate?" Fang asks, gesturing Yaya to sit by the tunnel as he does too.
"Yes," Yaya says. "It gets too cold back from where we're from that we need to head somewhere else bearable. We all didn't get to see the path we took to get here, so how do we know how far we are-?"
Turns out, Ying has already scooted outside, over the tunnel. She rushes back in to find them all seated down, exhausted. "For the love of pebbles- Actually," she says in her high voice. "You remember that mountain we always use as some sort of landmark to get here?"
"You mean, the weird ginger-looking one?" Yaya recalls easily.
"Yeah! This tunnel is literally right next to it! I looked at the stuff right next to it too. You know, the rail thing you have been talking about? It continues all the way over there! So if we continue down this path..."
We get home. Nobody even needs to say that aloud.
"Boys," Yaya says instead. They turn to her. "You guys should come along with us too. Do you have anywhere else to stay after this?"
"Uhm, M-Miss Yaya," Fang tries to protest out of modesty, but ending up biting his lower lip. "Actually, yes. I hhhave nowhere else to stay."
"Neither do I."
"Yeah," Ying scoffs. "Even if you did, there's no way I'm letting you go back to scaring anybody else in the woods like how you did with me, you potato!" Right after, she slams Gopal by the shoulder. She couldn't believe that first encounter really. After lies of zombies and narcissistic heroism, what is there for them to say they aren't kind of like real heroes now?
Soft laughter echoes in the tunnel when they remember that eventful day in the misty forest. Then, the giggling dies down. "Don't worry. You all are coming with us, okay? You too, BoBoiBoy-"
"BoBoiBoy?"
Back to the sight of him, he's leaning against the cave wall, tense and panting, although his stance looked like it was more reassured than ever. At the sound of his name, his head whips to their call. His hand trembles, showing what he's been holding.
He's breathing hard. He has taken the collar out of his neck. Between his fingers, it seems charred and damaged.
Heaving another breath, he forcefully tosses it into the burning trees. With that, it'll be gone forever.
That was a lot of force taken. He takes his head back and drops the weight of his body to sit down.
No one bothers to call him again. They just rush to his side. "You okay?"
"Yeah...yeah, I think I am," he finally murmurs.
For a while, Yaya couldn't even recognize the fatigued face lined with ash in front of her. Minor burns blotch at portions of his body and she can't even hurry to scan them all. What began as a fiesty abduction, what began as an image of a man clad in white within her presence...suddenly looked like it diminished.
His eyes had that strange bloodlust and yearning before. In his pool of bronze eyes once lay mystery, a sense of sadness, and a pang of emptiness. Like a dim, starless sky.
Now, something else takes over. For an eye that used to be stripped of shine, it's currently filled with stars.
Yaya can't tell if she can take this the good way. Because for a boy blinded of emotions for the longest time, for a person that has never seen the light of the sun, he's blinded by its rays.
"I-" It's like BoBoiBoy's trying to utter something. But nothing wrings out. "It's-"
"Yes...?"
"My dad could be dead now...My mom's gone too..."
So what, if The Man was his father? They still know how much that statement would hurt them all.
"We didn't say he was dead-"
Yaya looks at it again. His eyes of an overwhelming number of stars. They've seen all and nothing at the same time.
"You said to assume he's gone. Do I have nothing left? No- wait- I shouldn't feel that way, now should I...?" he stammers.
He's dead. You're free.
But what does being free mean?
You don't know the answer to that.
He did.
No! You are free! You don't need him.
What if you did? What if you still do?
Do I need him to be free?
"Is there an emotion like...this...?"
Pursing her lips, Yaya and the others watch BoBoiBoy with concern. Suddenly, they had forgotten how this is all still unfurling in his head for the first time. As they stare, they think, In this winter, do you think he's feeling the warmth for the first time? Is he still frozen, is he heating...or is he burning and scorching up?
The way he said it all felt numb to the tongue. This time, it's a new emptiness. Nothing in everything.
"I don't know an emotion like that, but..."
Words run dry from Yaya's mouth. BoBoiBoy continues, "For over sixty years, I dreamt of this moment, and now...it seems...real...? Is this the happiness you guys talk about? The jumpiness of overflowing joy? Or is this sadness? The well of- no- wait. This is anger. Because my dad is dead or- no- Not that- Am I- no, no, no, not that? Scared? Am I scared...? Is this fear? Or am I glad? What-"
"Hey-"
All of them try to calm him down. And even when he isn't throwing an outburst, they still need him to stop.
Only Yaya can attempt to actually speak with him.
"I- I don't know what this is..." he chokes out slightly. "Yaya, do you know this feeling? What's happening to me right now?"
Without the collar, he's feeling everything. Everything.
"Are you okay?" she asks.
"That's what I was asking you...! I don't know! I don't know what this is- I don't know what's happening to me- I don't know if I'm fine! Is this- Is this normal?"
More words jam in their throats. "We're...not sure..."
"You- don't know?"
"BoBoiBoy...?"
He begins to breathe rapidly. "What's happening to me? What's happening to me? What's-?"
At least he isn't throwing his arms everywhere, Yaya can see that. His lips just tremble at the surge of it all. Calming him down became Yaya's first priority. Her hands wave over him, attempting to orient him back to reality, let him settle down and fix whatever was happening in his head.
But she couldn't do it. She keeps getting distracted by his sudden flush of color by his cheeks. He seemed so pale before, now he's aflame. His eyes look like they're about to well up, leak, anything. Not even BoBoiBoy knows what's happening.
"Hey, please- Calm do-"
She can only manage to get a glimpse of his other hand, balled into a fist that he's been hiding from them.
"What's that? What did you...?"
BoBoiBoy actually doesn't even have the energy to keep what it is. Ying becomes the one to unfold his fingers for her. In his hand was a thin glass vessel of orange liquid.
She remembers that potion. That lustrous potion. Mostly from that first trip to the potions room. All of it became like a glimmering, distant memory. Yet if there was one thing she remembers, it was that the vessel had more liquid than what she's seeing.
"What did you do?"
"I don't-" he coughs out what he wishes he could say.
"I don't remember what that does but BoBoiBoy I swear if that does something to you!"
"What- What now?" He's too scared to think of what to do. What to say. What to feel. What to see. What to hear. "What should I do- What should I do-?"
One thing comes to mind.
If there's one thing Yaya can just manage to do at the moment, it's what her mother always did to her when she was uncomfortable. Her arms wrapped him in until her very fingers buckled by his back. To BoBoiBoy suddenly, everything turned warm...as if he could fly.
Over his shoulder, Yaya rested her chin. If only she could whisper properly, It's gonna be okay, before her voice could even crack. Like, how could you tell someone it's gonna be okay, when they aren't feeling okay themselves?
She took his head to her hand, pressing him against her until she could surpress all of the tears that might flow out.
For a first time, he feels warm. They feel warm.
Then, coldness again.
Their embrace only lasts for a few seconds before everyone starts seeing Yaya hugging nothing but the empty space. Pretty soon, her arms return and cling to her own self.
"BoBoiBoy?"
He disappeared. Dissipated. Or so they thought.
Tiny chirps sound from below her, emerging as if out of nowhere before Yaya completely feels a prickling sensation by her knees. It tickles for a while before she realizes what it is.
By her leg, an orange canary tries to climb to her lap as she remembers her trip to the potions room. BoBoiBoy once told him of a special, favorite in the whole collection. Its recipe, a secret at the time. A potion that could turn him into a bird.
Of course he turned into this bird. He's just adorably pathetic right now, Yaya chuckles wordlessly.
Ying, Gopal, and Fang watch her try and take the bird into her hands instead.
"Did he just?"
"Turn iiinto a bird? I think so."
"Why did he have to- Can he change back?" Ying asks Yaya.
It was still being tested, the last time she was told. Can he change back? No one knows.
Long stares follow rather than a proper answer. Over her palms, the bird is tiny, but its eyes are wide open, as if they're ready to see every island in the world. Its wings strong and undamaged, almost ready to fly.
In her grasp, the bird bounces as it peeps straight to her face. To her ears, they were melodies she can't understand. BoBoiBoy wants to tell them something, but they render inaudible to their senses.
If there's one thing they're sure of, however, he sounds lighter now. Yaya understands.
The potion. He was brewing it for a long time.
To fly away.
He wanted to be free.
There's a mix of wonder in their eyes as they try to listen to the canary's song. With the snow gently falling at the corner of their eye, it all already felt splendorous and calm. They're itching to go back home.
However, the bird's wings are also itching to fly.
It's like she's quick to read his mind already. How he's already yearning to look at what life already has for him. How he's yearning to clear his mind to see the path he's about to take. How he's yearning to live out the years he missed out in captivity.
They're all going home. To a world that welcomes them. But BoBoiBoy? He has no home to return to. Not one that will greet him warm arms that he deserves.
He'll know what will be for himself. He'll strike a way to tell himself that he deserves a second try in living this world.
They're all going home. They're leaving. And so will he.
"You want to fly now...?"
The canary tweets one last time before tilting its head to rub against Yaya's open thumb.
Had BoBoiBoy been crueler, he would've flown off without even a goodbye. But no. He's given her a chance already. She should learn how to let go.
There are just some times when people will want to carve their own lives. Like how a whole sapling decides to grow to a tree, its branches will eventually part.
Yaya remembers how Otoi left. Her dad, Ying's dad, probably their dad's dads...their mom's moms. Everybody leaves, really.
She sighs. Life is all about coming and going. Phases happen. And it's all normal.
Don't cry about the days when one was lost, laugh about the days they were found.
The bird can't wait. Yaya knows that.
"Go...It's okay...I'll be fine...You'll be fine..."
Moonlight peers slowly as Yaya extends her hand out the tunnel. It shines on his eyes. His bright, bright eyes.
Orange wings soar through the snow as they watch the bird shrink away from their sights. They don't expect him to look back. They can't. It's already enough to know that he'll be out there, living free. They aren't guaranteed to be happier, but it will be better.
But if fate were to ever be nicer to them, meeting again will be another fairytale...another fantasy...turned reality.
And BoBoiBoy will remember the face of the girl that freed him.
Their lips smile at the prospect. It isn't impossible.
Feet crunch on the snow while they walk down the tunnel together. From when Yaya left to find a myth, what she found instead...was a truth.
There are more things lying behind the simple word, 'happiness'.
They go home.
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