CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN:
THE GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS

Klaus -and Ben- left after Jason stopped chasing the seance around for having barbeque nights without him. He said something about going to see someone about paint?

So, Jason decided to go have some coffee. There was one he saw the other day, it had a 'whites only' sign so Jason gave it the finger and left. But there are bound to be others around, right? It's better for business that way.

Or he thought. He doesn't have a degree in business so he has no idea.

Anyways, when he got to his destination, he found Allison inside, sitting down with some of her friends.

And how can Jason refuse to support the black community and mess with racist assholes? He can't.

So he enters and heads straight to where Allison is sitting. The other racists back off, thinking he's gonna do something about the blacks, cause he's white and all whites hate blacks.

Sun goes up, the sky is blue, whites hate blacks.

Foolish idiots-

Allison was startled when suddenly someone pushed themself on the counter and sat right in front of her. Her friends went tense, thinking he was about to attack. But he's just a smol baby assassin with 70 something years in his pocket! He'd never!

Smiling at the dog boy, Allison relaxed and received a grin.

The owner walked up to him, "We're in the middle of something, kid."

"Yes," Jason nodded seriously, "You were about to sever these wonderful people some coffee and I want iced caramel macchiato for me."

The racists started murmuring between themselves.

"Hi Jason," Allison finally said with her smile intact.

"Heya, Allison," Jason waved, even though they were really close.

It didn't take long before the racists figured out that Jason was actually against them, so they went back to their booing all while Allison, her friends, and Jason sat calmly.

Jason and Allison would exchange looks occasionally, a 'can you believe these idiots' look and the other woman even introduced him to her friends!

Not long after Raymond joined them, but he was acting cold and distant.

Outside was filled with shouts of 'no more back door' and inside with 'get out'

It all went to hell when the owner when Jason, Raymond, and Allison were talking about Klaus and Luther and pushed a hot cup of coffee towards Allison, making her jump back and the officers in the diner react.

The one behind Allison twisted her arm behind her and slammed her face-first against the counter. Raymond was dragged outside and beaten while the others were ordered to put their hands up.

In the midst, Allison got free with the help of Jason and then they ran to find Raymond.

"You're next!" The officer shouted at Allison while two others held back Allison and Jason.

Biting one, the dog boy got himself free and then punched the one holding Allison, making her escape his hold and rumor the one beating Raymond.

He didn't hear what was said between Allison and Reymond, but then Klaus showed up and dragged them away.

They went back to Allison's and passed out.

Jason woke up to Klaus telling Allison the scorpion and frogs and how frogs are bitches and we don't negotiate with terrorists.

No idea how the story went from what it was to that specific moral of the story, but it's Klaus so it must have a deep meaning.

Turned out, Raymond had not come home that night and Allison was rightfully worried.

"Can I have my iced caramel macchiato before we go on the search party?" Jason grumbled and made his way around the house with his eyes closed. He did hit a wall, a table, and tripped over a chair. But he finally found the kitchen.

Good news, kitchen was there.

Bad news, no iced caramel macchiato.

Allison and Jason set out to find Ray, and the first place they hit up was Odessa's. There, they found Ray and the others having a meeting.

Without Allison.

And Raymond hadn't even bothered to call to say his okay.

Reymond lead Allison outside to talk to her and Jason waited inside, giving them privacy.

Odessa smiled at him, "Hello, Jason."

"Hey, Odessa!"

She cooed, "Do you want candy? We got some cherry-flavored ones that I'm sure you'll like."

Jason grinned, "I love cherry! Thanks!"

Mr. ET-don't-call-home (get it? Cause -)  came back in and held the door open for Jason, clearly indicating that he should leave now.

He left but not without Odessa giving him a handful of candy which he stuffed in his hoody.

On their way home, they found Luther!

Yayyy!

Not.

Again, Jason decided to give them some privacy and climbed up the tree behind them and played monkey.

They hugged, talked, gossiped.

Normal stuff.

Good news, they had iced caramel macchiato!!

Bad news, Apocalypse in five days, baby!

"Vanya is living on a farm, very happy," Allison said on their walk back while they both drank their drinks, "Luther is a boxer or something, Diego is in a nuthouse and Five turned up a few days ago."

"My Snuggluffagus is here!"

She looked at him with disgust, "Never say that again."

"Tubba Wubba?"

"Stop."

"Cutie Patootie?"

"Jason, I'm warning you-"

"He named me Cookie Monster, I should be allowed to get revenge."

Allison paused and then pointed at Jason, "Good point, ok go on."

"Fart bomb?"

•ᴥ︎•

The next morning, started the same as the last (besides worrying about ET).

Jason found his way to the kitchen with closed eyes and having stubbed his toes multiple times.

Allison looked on silently, horrified as he made no sound and just opened an eye just a bit to avoid stubbing it a fifth time.

She didn't warn him about the passed-out Klaus on the floor so he stumbled and crashed. No sounds came, no shouting, bo ouches, no nothing. Peeking inside, she found him curling up on the floor next to Klaus and went back to sleep.

They were both disasters.

She went upstairs to get her robe and when she came back Klaus was talking to a certain ghost.

"What ghost are you talking to now?" walking past the sleeping old-child, she set out to make breakfast.

"Oh just another," Klaus pushed himself up, "Just another old cowboy. They're usually cute but this one is ugly...and dumb."

"Why are they called cowboys when they ride horses?" Jason mumbled from his curled-up position, "Petition to name them horseboys."

"Signed," Klaus said it like a little cheers before drinking whatever was in the bottle.

"You want some?" He offered it to Allison.

They started talking feeling and Jason felt like just dying right there and there.

He was the worst at that.

Allison went to make better alcohol and she was right for that, so Jason decided to leave his cold position and went and snuggled up with his soul brother while soul sister made booze.

Fuck breakfast, just booze.

•ᴥ︎•

BONJOUR MA DUDES!

I'VE MISSED YOU
AJSDLKAJLDKAD

sorry I haven't updated in a while, was a bit busy.
but from now on -if nothing comes up- updates are due on Wednesdays!

hope you liked this chapter and in the next one cookie and Snuggluffagus will finally reunite!

(this chapter, while kinda short, was episodes 3,4, and 20 minutes of 5. not my fault Jason is hanging out with Klaus and/or Allison who don't get enough screen time.)

Small, horrible, quick drawing of the diner scene. (I am very bad at this please do forgive this monstrosity)

[Memes]