Yup..me has made ANOTHER edit. This time it's to Mad Hatter by Melanie Martinez!! Hope you guys enjoy it! =D

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Even though twelve days is not a long time, it surely feels like it.  Everything seems to be taking longer than usual and I don't like it.  It's making me nervous, like something won't go as planned and Peter won't follow through.  I can't sleep for the first three days, and on the fourth I only get a wink in before images of Tris laying lifeless on a table sprout into my mind and I have to open my eyes, have to stop them before they over take me and I go running into Erudite on a suicide mission trying to save Tris.

It's taking it's toll on me, I can tell.  I've only eaten a little over the three days of no sleep.  I can practically feel myself getting thinner and I'm suddenly reminded of how thin I was when I arrived at Dauntless.  I can't let that happen again - I'm not that person anymore.  

So I force myself to put on shoes and clothes and go to breakfast.

I get my food and sit down at Zeke's table.  He's starting to look more and more miserable every day Shauna isn't here.  I can relate.

"Hey buddy." He says when I sit down. "I'm surprised to see you here."

"Yeah I know.  Figured that if I didn't eat I'd get too skinny and not be able to help Tris when the time comes." I say, biting into my toast.

"Smart."

For the rest of the meal we sit in relative silence.  He attempts talking to me but it never gets anywhere. I guess I'm just not in the mood.

Until he breaks the news to me.

"Marcus left a few days ago." I immediately tense at his name.  It brings me back to that moment when I was finally undaunted by him - that moment when I in essence turned into him.  Tris would not be pleased.  "You beat him up pretty bad."

"Oh." I say, because I don't have the courage to say anything else.  What is there left to say, really? 'Yeah, I beat him up.  I'm sorry though.' or 'I beat him because of what he did to me, so it's justified.' No, those didn't seem right.

"Just so you know I think what you did was very Dauntless of you.  You put him in his pace, showed him who's boss.  I doubt anyone will be making fun of you again." He's smirking proudly, like this is something to be proud of.

Like he doesn't understand that when I did that I was doing exactly what he did to me, which didn't make me any better.

But I don't tell him that.

"Yeah, me too."

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On the seventh day, I leave Dauntless to take a walk.  The city makes me think of Tris, who won't stay off my mind anyway.  I might as well entertain my thoughts rather than dismiss them.

It's breezy outside, but not too breezy.  The temperature is just right.

I really have no aim to where I'm going but I'm careful to watch what's in front of me lest my thoughts somehow trick me into showing up at Erudite headquarters' doorstep.

I think about going to Candor to check on Shauna, for Zeke and to make sure they're treating her correctly.

I decide to go.

The Merciless Mart looks exactly like it did when we left, only the glass doors have been replaced with another material you can't see through.

Great. I think, Now I won't know if someone is waiting for me on the other side.

I'll have to take my chances.

After all of this, the doors still remain unlocked and I slip inside.

Thankfully no one is waiting at the door for me, but there are guards at the doors.  Now that Dauntless is gone they seem to be short on them.

I get the urge to snicker.

So they did need us.

One of the guards walk up to me and I see their hand twitching, probably debating whether or not to point the gun at me.

They choose not to.

"State your business." She says firmly.

"I'm here to check on a friend." I throw my hands up in surrender so she won't think I'm somehow doing something scandalous.

She scowls. "You're Dauntless - all of your friends are gone."

"No, they aren't.  There was one girl, her name is Shauna, she was unable to travel with us.  She should be in the infirmary." 

It looks like she's contemplating letting me go or not but at last she must understand that I'm not a threat because she moves to the side and lets me pass.

"Just go down that hallway," she says, pointing to my left. "First door on the right."

"Thanks." 

I go down the hallway she told me to and realize that even if she hadn't told me which door it was I would've guessed it.  The smell of alcohol is strong enough to reach my nostrils long before I reach the door.

I push the door open and am hit with several smells: blood, water, and vomit.

It almost makes me want to turn around.

Almost.

It's easy to find Shauna. She's sitting up in her bed with her leg propped up.  She's awake and she looks angry.

When she spots me coming towards her her face instantly lights up, but it drops a second later as she realizes that I came alone.

"Hey, you doing alright?" I smile at her, happy to see that she's alright.

"Yeah I'd be doing better if my entire Faction hadn't left me simply because I couldn't walk." She grumbles, folding her arms.

"Shauna it wasn't that...You were still unconscious by the time we left - we had no choice but to let them continue operating on you.  Otherwise you wouldn't have fully recovered."

"Well I still haven't fully recovered you know.  They said my legs'll be paralyzed for the rest of my life." She looks sad as she says this.  I can't blame her.  She's Dauntless.  Most of her favorite things to do involve using her legs.

"It's alright Shauna.  You're still the same person."  I put my hand on her shoulder so that she'll look at me again. "Zeke misses you a lot you know.  He looks miserable." 

She smirks. "So he does care..."

I look at her like she's crazy.  "Of course he cares.  He's cared from the start."

She rolls her eyes. "Alright, whatever you say."

"When did they say you could leave?"

"As soon as I was ready.  They already have the wheelchair ready." She scowls when she says 'wheelchair'.

I go over to where it's sitting and bring it over to her bed.  I then take her foot off of it's perch even as she asks what I'm doing.

Then I pick her up bridal-style and sit her in the wheelchair.

"We're going home." I say, and push her out of the infirmary.

As we travel to Dauntless a thought crosses my mind.

I wonder...in a different life, if I hadn't have done all the things I had...perhaps I'd fallen for Shauna instead of Tris.

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Sorry if it's sort of boring.... AND I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN FOREVER DOGGIT! Sorry guys...Thanks for 300 subscribers and all your awesome support!!! =D