"Pick it up."
Norman said and I looked at him with popping eyes.

"I don't smoke, sir."
I said instead of taking that cigarette in my hand.

"I don't think he asked you anything. He ordered you to do it, no questions."
Neil said coming towards us.

I looked at him with begging eyes and he looked back at me sternly.

I gulped down and his 'I want every bit of your trust' rang in my ears.

I looked down again and back up at Neil with a pinch of hope.

"That's it. Hundred Diamonds. Quick."
He said in his rarely annoyed tone.

I dropped down and started pushing.
He has been repeatedly attacking my shoulders and arms and they have been in a constant state of pain.

"Hundred Diamond Pushups completed, sir."
"Those were not quick. Again. Quick."

How can he be so heartless?

I started going all over again, this time faster than the previous set.
Two hundred Pushups back to back with cramped up arms - he really is angry at me.

"Hundred Diamond Pushups completed, sir."
"You call this quick?"
Neil asked me and my heart fell on the floor.

I can't do any better than this. Another hundred will never finish.

"What do you think, sir?"
Neil asked Norman and my hands started shaking. I knew that bastard is going to make me suffer more.

"Get up."
Norman said to my surprise and I pulled myself up. I was panting and it was obvious to both of them.

"Now will you pick it up or do you need him to repeat?"
Neil asked me without a crack in his tone.

"Yes sir."
I didn't waste a single second and lifted the cigarette up. Anything to avoid Neil's merciless wrath.

"Slide that end between your index and middle finger. Put that end on your lips and stop breathing from your nose. Don't breathe through your mouth either. Hold up."
Neil guided me about how to smoke a cigarette. I suddenly hated him more than ever.

But the hate slowly turned into torment because I was standing without breathing.
My hands were near my lips holding the cigarette and my lips were sealed.
I needed oxygen!
I felt pathetic.

Neil looked at me with an eyebrow raised.
We were having a conversation Norman never heard.

* I've taught you to hold it for long. Don't dare disappoint me.

- But that was underwater!

* You want me to give you a separate on-ground session? Because I can totally arrange that.

- Negative. I'll hold my breath till you say.

* Better.

When I couldn't hold anymore, Neil brought a lighter and lit it next to the other end.

"Breathe through this. Any other air goes in, and I'm going to punch that air out. Two breaths before you take this off your lips."
His warning was clear.

I had no option of breaking the seal my lips had formed around the cigarette and I was in dire need of oxygen.

I did what he ordered once and felt my lungs set on fire. I swallowed what I felt like soot and held my breath because I knew if I exhale now, I'll cough till I die.

After holding for a few seconds, I exhaled slowly. The burn in my throat was unbearable.

I looked at Neil pleading him to let me take normal 78% nitrogen and 21% oxygen and spare me this carbon. His looks hardened and he nodded towards the cigarette. He was still holding the lighter very close.

I prepared myself mentally to commit this sin voluntarily this time and breathed again.
This time I couldn't hold it and I coughed as soon as the nicotine hit my throat.

I moved the cigarette away and coughed and coughed.
The fresh air felt like heaven!

When I finally got control of my body back, I noticed that Norman and Neil were looking at me with a straight face.
Like it was nothing as life threatening as it was for me.

I bent down to keep the cigarette back.

"Na Na."
Norman said and I stopped in my track, hoping I don't hear the words I'm dreading.

"Look at the burnt end. How does it look?"
Neil asked.

"Mm.. Orange? Sir.."
I really didn't know what to say.

"Beat it out against the ashtray."
I rubbed it and got the fire off.

Neil threw the lighter at me and I caught it before I could let it hit my face.

I straightened up with the cigarette in one hand and lighter in another.
God please no.

"Light it back yourself. Like you did a few seconds ago. It should light up in one go this time."
He said heartlessly. What's gotten into him!

I can't even get the image off my mind - how would I have looked - like a fucking chain smoker.

I coughed again and had to hold one end between my teeth to stop it from falling off. Thank my stars, the orange returned in just one deep breath.

I was crying on the inside. I committed a sin I promised myself I never will.
I hate myself.

"You really have him there."
Norman said, impressed.

Yes bitch, he has me right there! Right where you wanted me to be! And I don't have another fucking option!

"That thing goes in every third breath. It should not die out till the brown end is lit."
Neil ordered.

I looked at the thing in my hand and accepted that I'll be finishing this today if I wish to face him.

By the last one, that smoke's torture had come down but my throat was not ready to forget the burn just yet.
I promised myself I'll try to evade this situation if I know that it's coming again.

As soon as the brown part was lit, I showed it to both of them.
"It has reached the end."

"Put it off."
Neil said pointing towards the ash tray.

I thanked him silently and wished I could read Bible because I won't be sleeping tonight.

"I want to see his shooting skills if you permit."
Neil asked Norman and suddenly I was interested.

Norman looked at me with the same hate.

"Front rolls of the ground. Three rounds."
Neil said before Norman could tell whether I'll be touching my loves again soon or not.

"Yes sir."
I hate you bossy Neil!

I took off for the ground and felt fresh air enter my lungs.
I was feeling so remorseful I wanted to puke. If there was one thing that my dad hated, and Beta too for that matter, it was smoking.

Both these men repeated same wise words.
"There's nothing called first cigarette. Once you have had one, it never stops at just one."
So I had promised myself never to smoke or even try a single cigarette in my entire life.
After meeting Beta and hearing the same words from him, my decision was final.
Until today.
I hate myself.

After I completed three front rolls and absolutely wrecked my back, I report back only to find that Norman had gone.

"Three front-roll rounds of ground completed, Neil."
I said panting.

"Tired much?"
"Negative."
I say still panting. Wow!

"Either you stop lying. Or stop dying."
He said smirking.

I took a few moments to control my breaths back.
Then I spoke "I'm not tired, Neil."

"Good. Sit down."
He motioned me to sit on the sofa and I didn't know which muscle to move.

"For a Lieutenant working right under my nose, you disobey me too much! And what was that before? What did you want to show to Major Norman? That you do as you like and I don't go against it?"
Shit.

"No sofa for you. Chair."
He pointed at me.

Fuck you James!
You were getting a cushion for that torn out ass. Now you get nothing but cramped ass muscles. Congrats!

I got in the position with my hands sprayed in front and hip and knees bent.
Yeah, I was a chair myself.

The bar attendant came to clear the area.
Suddenly all my attention was on him.
Where all is he walking, what all is he touching, how many steps, how many breaths, how many seconds etc etc.

"You've never smoked before, right?"
Neil said and I had to allot a part of my attention to his words along with my eyes fixed on him.
"Negative, Neil."

"You've ever seen me smoking since we met?"
"Negative, Neil."

"Do you think I know how to smoke?"
What kind of question is that? He practically taught me like a regular smoker pressurising a teenager.
"Yes, Neil."
I can be honest with him. He doesn't want filtered answers and thank god for that.

Suddenly it struck me.
If he's too smooth a bitch, why doesn't he do it at all?
I mean a guy like him should finish a whole pack in twelve hours.

"I know how to. I'm not addicted. That's a part of the job."
He said calmly.

My hands were staring to shake.
He looked at them and then looked at my face. I tried not to give away the pain I was feeling.
He nodded, appreciating my efforts.
Such a stone heart.

The bar attendant left and now my full attention was on my body. And trust me, I prayed to god to send that guy in here again, or make Neil say something so that I can take my mind off myself.

"Today was just a lesson. You'll revise it twice more just so you don't forget it. There are times when you have to light a cigarette or help someone else light up one just to start a conversation. If, at that moment, you have this skill, it will be a smooth entry and they'll feel you as their own. One smoker has an unsaid bonding with another, because they can feel each other's weakness. The only difference in your case is - you'll know their weakness, not feel it. Because you'll never touch a cigarette a fourth time. Thrice in front of my eyes - out of which one was today - and that's it. If I ever heard that you touched that thing without my knowledge or permission, you'll chair for four hours straight."
My hands were shaking badly now and I was about to give up.

"Ten seconds to think over it."
He hushed bending a little towards me.

I did as he said and it made so much sense.
I've seen so many movies where the hero lights up villain's cigarette when he's in dire need of fire and immediately gets into his good books.
Though it only happens in movies but one thing that they show that's really true is - addiction. They are addicted to the smoke.

So this might actually work if I have to stay close to someone who is deeply into it.

Never knew learning something I considered a sin will make sense.
It's just learning how to use a weak person's weakness by showing him the same weakness from my side, all the while not being weak at all.
Brilliant.

"Countries with their capitals."
He said bringing me out of my trance.

"All countries on the world map, their capitals and other famous cities. Your next task. Viva after three days."
What the hell is he preparing me for?

"Yes Neil."

"Am I allowed firing now?"
I ask raising my hopes.

"With such a body control?"
He pointed at my hands that were shaking. "Not a chance. You'll touch no weapon anytime soon."
He said heartlessly.

Guess I'll have to wait for few more days.
Bitch Norman completed his own CT and went back to his posting, leaving me behind with this man.
I didn't know whether to be glad or scared.

"Up."
Neil said and I exhaled in relief.

"Major Norman knows what I did with commander."
He stated a fact that twisted my guts.

"Damn. Did he tell General Warren?"
I asked scared.

"No. In fact he was happy I did that. He didn't want to do that job anyways - said you wouldn't have survived under him. But now chances of seeing you as a Class-I are high."
Neil said with a little pride in his tone.

"He did? He wants me to clear the trial?"
I was shocked.

"He knew you had potential. It was him who wanted to get rid of you."
"That makes complete sense. Atleast now I have one less human standing on my way."

"Don't think that your way has become any easier with him gone."
He said curtly.

"Yes, Neil. I know you're here only to guide. The efforts have to come from me. And I won't disappoint you."
I said.

"That's what I want to hear. Now get on your job."
His tone didn't flinch.

I ran to library straightaway to get the world map and hung it on the bathroom wall. Guess I'll have something to do other than learning German - while I piss, shit and shower.

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First thing first - I don't promote smoking. So no, you need not go try one.
Second, nothing was said / thought (by my characters) against any smoker. So no need to get offended either.

Now.
Who else hates Neil, because I definitely do.
How heartless can he be?

And WOW! Norman actually said that about James? Quite surprising!

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As expected, none of you have guessed the surprise I mentioned in last chapter, so I'll tell you myself.
But.
In next chapter. 😉

And I want all my 50PM addicts to be ready for a big bang! 😁

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