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Chapter 29

*Patrick's P.O.V.*

I really tried my best to give her the best proposal, of course, who wouldn't want to give that to the person you truly love? I chose the studio to be the place, I don't want the public to see it too, I want it to be as romantic as possible...but still, it turned out like this? I'm really bad at this thing I guess.

Chasity was panicking in front of me, saying that she's not Chasity...and that the girl I saw that approached me was the real one. Of course, that made a lot of sense, that girl could really be the true Chasity, well I mean the face? the memories? and everything. What I don't understand is...why I didn't believe her?

"Please, please, Patrick! Believe me!" Chasity begged in front of me and I got to my feet. The others approached her too with worry in their eyes. "How can you all be this blind and deaf?! You're torturing that girl, the real Chasity. I didn't tell you because...because she said not to and she convinced me that you wouldn't believe it and that thought disgusts me! Especially with you Patrick! Everyday I always try to give you a hint that I wasn't her, but you noticed nothing! You should be the first fucking person who should notice this, but no! Instead, you're the first person who kept on denying it., you're the first person who threw the idea away!" she reasoned. I'm seeing every inch of determination in her eyes and I can feel that she's telling the truth, but then again...there's something I don't understand.

"Maybe you're right! Maybe I did close out on her...or whoever she is. B-but it's just because that I-I'm afraid! You! You're what I want, you don't have memories of the past...that horrible past that I caused you. I caused Chasity a lot of pain back then and I'm afraid that I would do it again and again, and I'm afraid that she'll always remember it! I don't...I don't want it to be that way! I want something new, a new start. Yes, I don't believe that girl because she's also working with Matthew...but more than that, I don't want to believe it because I just don't want to!!" I explained and I myself don't know where I got that idea...but I think that's the closest explanation to what I am feeling right now.

Chasity looked at me in disbelief and in shock and one blink away, I felt that my right cheek burned from her hard slap. I heard her breathing got heavier and she continued looked at me, this time angrily. Andy got hold of her and kept on telling her to calm down, but it seems that she's not even listening to him.

"How could you! Y-you're so stupid, Stump!! Afraid?! Afraid that you're going to hurt her...Well, do you think that denying it will help her?! Have you gone mad, Patrick?! Those memories...that past is what binds the both of you and you want to throw that away because you're fucking afraid?!!! You're a coward, Patrick! I can't believe you're like this! I should have just pushed Chasity to show herself again than going to this point, YOU'RE SELFISH! Maybe Chasity's decision will be the best right now! Maybe she deserves death better than being with a fucking coward like you!" she hissed at me.

Yes, I need all that. Those harsh words, that hard slap in the face, she's right, I'm nothing but a coward. I felt like my life flashed in front of my eyes, and it's not the best memories...it was just all the hatred I have given Chasity...the moment I found out she lied to us for being a boy, the moment I became mad at her for being kind with me, the times I ignored her and treated her like shit, the moment I chose to leave her and proposed to Elaine...and now this. All of those are the stupidest thing I have ever done to her. I honestly thought that I have been making the right decision here...I can't even imagine what torment I gave Chasity if what this girl in front of me is saying is the truth.

"Wait, whoa, whoa. What do you mean death?!" Pete asked her and that's the same question I wanted to ask, but can't.

"I found a note in front of my door, saying that she found a way to cope up with all this...this fucking torture you gave her! Do you know how she felt hopeless, Patrick?! You're always the number one person who says that that girl is made out of hope, but you fucking made her lost it all. That night I saw her, I saw how much she needed you, but she knows that you'll never believe her. Do you realize how hard that is for her? I would have done anything too, but she knows that you won't even believe anything about this...because, she's right...she knew! That you don't want her anymore. Do you realize how that --

"STOP! JUST STOP!" I exploded. I wasn't angry at her, I was angry with myself and all these realization right now.

"Okay, we need to find Chasity...or that girl right now and get this thing over with!" Joe said. "This is enough, whether you or that girl is the real Chasity, we know we made a lot of mistakes already! But it's not too late to turn everything right, so let's just go!" he added.

"That's the problem, I have no idea where to find her. That poor girl. I know she's going to do something that she'll regret. With this memory, I feel like she's my twin or something, I know she's made out of positivity and for her to give up like this...it's just unbelievable." she said and she had to lean on the wall. I know she wanted to find her as soon as, the determination in her eyes shows this, but she's feeling hopeless too.

I, on the other hand, just involuntarily moved, making my way towards the door. I felt that everyone's eyes are on me.

"You have any idea on where to go?" Pete asked me before I set my foot out of the room.

"No, but I will do anything to find her and find the truth about ---

Before I can even finish my sentence I heard Chasity laughing lowly, she then looked at me with much disappointment in her face.

"You already know the truth even before, you're just a coward to accept it." she said.

And I swear I couldn't agree more to that.

********************************

*Chasity's P.O.V.*

"So, he's really going to propose to her." I said to myself while I stalk at them through these cameras Matthew put on their studio.

I was seeing Patrick readying this surprise for me, well technically it really is for me, he just doesn't know. I'm happy and sad at the same time too, at least I found out that he loves me to this extent...it's just sad that I won't be able to feel this myself and tjat I'll have another person experience this for me, this is a new level of having a proxy.

I smiled sadly to myself and turned off all the monitors before I returned to my seat and stared at this turned off TV.

"You won't watch till C gets there?" Matthew suddenly asked. I didn't know that he was in there too.

"No, I know it'll turn out well. Besides, I'll just feel jealous again and sad...and everything. I just have to let it be." I said calmly.

Maybe I've accepted it now, or maybe I'm just showing off this fake courage. I don't mind it anyway, because I know sooner or later, I won't remember any of this.

"When do you want to --

"Tomorrow and I'm really sure about it now, you're right that its the only way." I told him and he gave me a small smile. "I just have one question, where's my brother?"

"I honestly don't know Chasity, the moment they thought that C is you, he just disappeared."

"He knew that she's not the real me, right?" I asked.

"Yes, he knew that you're dead. Maybe he just let C be, I mean, maybe he realized that he can't have the real you again and just let her be with them because, you know, they can't pin point thay she's really not you. Maybe he decided move on." He said and here I am again, believing everything his saying.

"I hope so, I really don't need him to continuously think of me." I said.

"Are you really sure about your decision, Chasity?" He asked.

I looked at him with a smile and I nodded at him.

"I'm sure...and please, don't call me that, I'm not Chasity anymore." I said.

I really can't believe that denying to be a girl will lead me to deny my whole life.

{Thanks for reading!
Well guys, it's ending! But don't worry, I'll give you tw endings :). So look forward to it.

So, again, thank you guys for all the support for this fanfic. I know sometimes it seems absurb and all that, but still you stick with it to the end! I love you all for that! Thank you very much ^_^}

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