♫ There's one thing baby

That I don't understand

You keep on telling me

I ain't your kind of man ♫

"What are we watching?" Alex asked as I walked into the common room with him after dinner. Sidney had fallen asleep on the table and none of us had the decency to wake him. That guy could seriously sleep through the end of the world. I had also decided that Alex was my favourite. I just wanted to take him home with me and keep him in my closet, in a totally nonsexual way considering he was my brother's age.

"We made this epic horror movie," a very drunk Jonathon slurred, with a big smile and a travel mug, "you have to see it." He didn't even wait until dinner ended before he started drinking.

"I think I'll pass," Alex said. Jonathon rolled his eyes and leaned against the mustard coloured couch.

"You're such a party animal, Alex," Jonathon said dryly.

Alex's round cheeks turned a cherry shade of red and he looked down towards the ground. It was obvious he admired his brother more than Jonathon knew.

"Logan?" Jonathon turned to me.

I spared one more look at Alex before shaking my head at Jonathon's offer. Alex's mouth tipped into a slight smile, and Jonathon staggered away, murmuring something about us not recognizing his Grammy quality film. He was that wasted.

"What do you want to do?" I asked.

Alex spun the deck of cards in his hand and looked up at me through his lashes, his bottom lip between his teeth. God, this boy was going to break some hearts one day.

He looked towards the darkness of the movie-ready common room, and then to the questionable giggles coming from the teachers' lounge, then back at me. He clearly was waying the options and I could already tell, none of them seemed desirable to him.

"We can go to my room? It's at the end of the hall," I offered.

He was half a foot shorter than me, which was understandable since he was just a kid, but it didn't stop the oddly parental feeling inside of me as he walked next to me with his shoelace untied. How could Jonathon turn out so.... Interesting... while Alex was such a perfect, quiet kid.

I pushed open the door to the room, revealing the warm, musty smell that had my nose crinkling and Alex pulling his forest green sweatshirt up to his eyes. The room felt like a sauna, but the heat wasn't on.

"What's wrong with your room?" he asked, plopping down on Sidney's bed, sheets still balled up from our escapades at lunch.

"It has two settings- sauna and Antarctica."

I pushed open the window, despite the huge snow drifts outside, and then I joined him sitting on the bed.

"Can we play a game I actually know this time?" I whined.

"What games do you know?" he asked, shuffling the cards so exactly and effortlessly that I was mesmerized.

"Crazy Eights."

He laughed, but started dealing out the cards anyways.

We played silently for near a half hour, listening to the obnoxious sounds coming from the common room down the hall. By the sounds of it, I was pretty sure Ian and Hudson had already been murdered in their movie, and Leigh was next in line.

Alex broke the silence with a question that had me choking on my own spit.

"How did you know you were gay?"

I coughed incessantly, until my lungs were sore, my eyes were watering, and there wasn't enough breath support for me to cough once more.

"What?!"

A brush crawled up from Alex's finger tips all the way to the tips of his ears that touched his light blond hair.

"I just mean... like... how-w-when, did you..?"

"I'm not gay," I said flatly, and his eyes widened.

"But you and Sid-"

"And Leigh," I interjected. He stopped for a minute and dropped the card in his hand.

"Oh." This kid was way too innocent to be here. Hell, I was too innocent to be here.

"Yeah... Did you need advice on like coming out or something? Because I really can't help with that, but I can ask around?"

"No, no."

"What then? Do you like someone?"

"Uh, y-yeah but I-I," he stuttered, his cheeks turning a darker shade of red. I sighed audibly and leaned back on the bed, still keeping eye contact with him.

"Can we skip the part where I pretend I don't know you like me? Because this isn't a Julia Roberts movie, and I'm not good at bullshitting. You're a little, really, too young for me. But I have a brother I think you'll love."

"You have a gay brother?" he asked, looking perplexed. I laughed a little. Flynn, gay. That would make all those times I've used my dick as a way to win the bathroom slightly more awkward. And that time he stole my middle school girlfriend. Good times.

"Nope. I'm sure you'll love him anyways though."

"Gee, thanks."

I laid a reassuring hand on Alex's shoulder and he looked up at me with a meek smile. He was still playing with the edges of the cards that I had long forgotten about.

Sidney chose that moment to burst into the room, yelling about how we had left him asleep on the table, like the great friends we are.

"I woke up to an old Italian man poking me with a metal spatula and asking if I was dead! Was it really so hard to wa-" He stopped flailing his arms and yelling dramatically long enough to look over at me and Alex and ask, "Am I interrupting something?"

"No."

"Yes," I said.

"First you're kissing me, then you're kissing girls, now you're kissing children, and you were worried I was going to give you an STD."

Sidney scoffed, Alex's eyes widened, and I paled. Sidney crossed his arms rather triumphantly and I picked up my cards again, feigning disinterest in the conversation, which wasn't very convincing unless I was playing Crazy 8's with myself, because Alex seemed very interested in what Sidney was saying.

"You were not my first kiss."

"Because that's believable," Sidney retorted with a laugh.

"Offended," I yelled, throwing the cards at Sidney and missing by a football field. I never was one for sports.

"Don't care."

"I think I should go..." Alex trailed off, picking up his scattered cards and shoving them into the box.

"Yes," Sidney commanded and I glared at him.

"No! Alex, please stay," I said, grabbing his wrist. He stared at the spot where I had touched him as if he might break out in hives any second.

"Yeah, he seems like more of an observer anyways."

Sidney slung an arm over Alex's shoulders and he stiffened instantly. I rested my hand on Sidney's chest for a second before pushing him so violently he stumbled backwards, freeing Alex. His cheeks flushed with embarrassment that I had almost knocked him over.

"He's just kidding, Alex."

"I wasn't, actually." He took a challenging step closer to me and Alex took about 15 backwards.

"Sidney, you're scaring him."

"In five more minutes we'll be scarring him."

"You think you can last five minutes? That's cute."

"That sounds like a challenge," he whispered, his voice dropping an octave, sounding almost gravelly. I wondered how many people he had used that on, and if it always worked on them like it did on me.

Sidney reached a soft hand up to touch my jaw and I heard the door click.

"Alex?" I pulled away from Sidney, but Alex was already long gone, leaving a card behind. The 4 of spades, which sat right between were Sidney and I were stood.

"So, I hear they're playing strip poker. Wanna check it out?" Sidney asked.

"Nah, I'm crashing," I replied.

It was mostly true; I was fairly tired. I also believed that strip poker was like nudist beaches- you saw way too much of the ones you'd prefer not to see any part of, and I liked my eyes. I also had this sad hope that maybe Sidney would offer to stay with me, but he didn't. I mean, it wasn't like he was my boyfriend or anything.

"Ah, okay. See you later?" He asked as he hovered by the door.

"Mhm." I tried not to sound disappointed because that was just sad. Sidney didn't catch on. He closed the door, leaving me alone in the musty room.

I sat on Sidney's bed, telling myself I would change my clothes and brush my teeth in five minutes. Basically, I was just avoiding the inevitable climb up to my bunk. They were right, I had regretted it. All my muscles were sore from the shitty mattress to the point that going up the ladder felt like an exhausting workout. Plus, it's not like Sidney was here to tell me to move, so I had time. I examined the metal bed frame above me, and ran my fingers over the wooden walls, and took in the overwhelming sent of Sidney.

My eyes shot open only to be met with darkness, and someone's grip on the bottom of my pants. I lifted my head to see the brown curls I'd come to know too well. I pulled my feet away and he stared at me in confusion.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"My bad. I didn't realize you liked sleeping in jeans," Sidney said.

The button and zipper was already undone, which was disturbing to know I had slept through. I grabbed my jeans by the belt loops and sat up, trying to shimmy out of them. And I had almost gotten them off when I hit my head on the top bunk.

"Shit," I cursed, falling back into Sidney's pillow. My hands abandoned my pants and flew to my forehead.

"You okay?" Sidney managed to say in the midst of his chuckling.

I looked around the empty room, and then back at Sidney, still just standing there in the dark.

"Where is everyone?"

"Jonathon passed out in the common room, Hudson is in some girl's room, and Ian is... around."

My head pulsed in pain and I took a sharp breath. Sidney sat on the edge of the bed, ducking slightly.

"Doing okay there, Logibear?"

"Fuck off, Sidney."

We sat in silence for a few minutes, and eventually he flopped down on the bed next to me, and I really couldn't complain since it was his bed. Not that I'd want to because, you know, Sidney.

"Care to explain why you're on my bed?"

"Too tired to climb."

"I see. And the two single beds and other bottom bunk just weren't as good as mine?"

I was blushing, and he knew it even in the dark, because he poked my cheek and said, "Tomato face."

The wind was howling outside, and the room had shifted to its freezing cold setting. I started to roll off the bed and give Sidney his space, but he grabbed my bicep and pulled me back. Then he nuzzled his face into my shoulder, causing his hair to brush the back of my neck, and a shiver to run through my entire body.

"Sidney..." I whispered into the darkness.

"Yeah?"

"When we get back to school, are we going to act like we don't know each other?" I didn't want this to be just the cool story I told. At the very least, I wanted to be friends. We all know that's a damn lie but just mind your business, okay?

"Do you want to?"

"No," I admitted, nearly gnawing through my bottom lip as I waited for his response.

"Okay."